Fic: Not A Girl (Chapter 5)
Title: Not a girl
Rating: PG-14
Genre: Humor, romance
Word count: about 13,000 (total), 2,335 (Chapter 5)
Disclaimer: I only own the plot.
Summary: Kazuya Kamenashi feels the strain of being a JE idol. He thinks girls have life easy. That was until he wakes up with girl parts.
A/N: Birthday wishes coming true was a plot of the Jim Carrey movie “Liar, Liar.” Technically, it's not mpreg because as Junno pointed out: “Technically, you're not a man. You would not be pregnant if you are. And since you are then...”
A/N for this chapter: The slight angst here but it's more like angst wannabe or Kazuya being a drama queen and Jin attempting to be emo or something. Lame chapters I warn thee XD]
Chapter 5
Jin, sitting on a bench, watched as Kazuya walks towards him. The younger man had just finished practicing his dance and was rubbing his sweaty hair with a towel. As Kazuya approaches, Jin noticed that his youngest band mate's shirt was not buttoned all the way down.
As soon as Kazuya got near enough, he pulled the other's shirttail to propel the boy towards him. “Button you shirt,” Jin said.
“Why? Stop,” Kazuya said and slapped Jin's hands off his shirt.
“It's cold, Kame,” Jin worriedly said.
“Not for me. My body's like an oven perennially set to bake a cake.” Kazuya drank from his water bottle. Jin watched in awe - from Kazuya's pink lips on the bottle, to his silky throat, to his shirt-covered chest (at which, Jin slightly smirked) down to his very subtly swollen belly. Jin was suddenly overwhelmed and before he could stop himself, he grabbed Kazuya and planted a kiss on the latter's belly.
“What are you doing?” the surprised Kazuya exclaimed. The feel of Jin's lips on his belly created a warm tingling feeling all over his body and he could not help but smile. He unconsciously pressed Jin's head against his stomach.
“Maybe we should get married,” Jin murmured into Kazuya's belly.
“What?” Kazuya asked, gently pushing Jin's face off his belly.
Jin looked up and knew Kazuya heard him because the younger man was blushing. “I said maybe we should get married.”
Kazuya didn't like how he felt - happiness started to surge within him. He could feel his heart bloat as it hammers into his chest. He did not like it all because he had felt that once before but when that feeling ended, in its place came a numbing pain. And it hovered until it became a burdening gloom. He did not want to go through that again. Not especially because of Jin again.
Jin pressed his face on Kazuya's belly again. “We should get married...you're my girl now,” Jin said.
And there it was...it didn't even last a minute, Kazuya painfully thought. The heart that started to bloat suddenly contracted and squeezed in his chest. Tears welled on Kazuya's eyes. He wriggled out of Jin's embrace. “I'm not marrying you,” he said coldly and walked away without looking back at the puzzled Jin.
♡♡♡♡♡
Junno had to leave earlier than the rest of the band, forcing Maru to ride with the rest on their way back to Tokyo. This was a good thing, as far as Kazuya was concerned. He was able to maneuver Maru and Ueda to sit beside him at the back of the car leaving Jin with no choice but to sit up front beside the driving Koki.
All through out their travel, Jin kept looking back at Kazuya and asking him if he's okay or if he needs anything. Kazuya would just glare at Jin and shake his head stiffly. On the three occasions he asked for a pit stop, he asked Koki directly.
As they approached Tokyo, as they near going their separate ways to each of their apartments, Kazuya suddenly felt very depressed and felt an overwhelming need to cry. He could not turn his face away to hide his tears as he was seated between Ueda and Maru but he just could not control his tears. He decided to feign falling asleep and rested his head on Maru's shoulder. Then subtly, he buried his face on his band mate's shirt.
When Maru felt his shirt getting wet, he shifted. But before he could say anything, Kazuya clamped a hand on his mouth and Maru understood. He just hoped he would later be able to get away fast enough from Jin, who currently was shooting him dagger looks through the rear view mirror.
Kazuya asked to be dropped off first and no one protested. Jin did not even attempt to walk him to his apartment seeing as how Kazuya seem to have suddenly found Jin's presence revolting. When they stopped to drop off Ueda, Jin quickly got out of the car, pulled open the right back door, causing the sleeping Maru to fall off.
“What the...!” Maru exclaimed as he found himself sprawled on the ground.
“Why are you making a move on Kazuya?” Jin angrily demanded. Ueda strode near with Koki right behind.
“I am not,” Maru calmly said as he stood up.
Jin's eyes narrowed at Maru. “You were nuzzling him!” Ueda's left eyebrow lifted.
“I was not,” Maru, still calm, defended himself as he brush dirt off his pants.
“His hand was on your face!” insisted Jin.
“Oh for chrissake, Jin,” Maru exasperatedly said. “Kazuya was crying and he did not want me to tell on him. You're the one who should explain. What the hell did you do to him this time?”
The three young men looked at Jin. Jin suddenly looked lost and forlorn. He pushed his hands inside his pants pockets and kicked the ground, causing a flurry of dust. He was more confused now. He could not understand why Kazuya suddenly turned cold on him when he, in fact, proposed marriage. And he mumbled this fact to his three friends.
Koki sat on the car's hood. “How did you propose?”
“I said 'maybe we should get married',” replied Jin.
Ueda's forehead creased. “No, really, what exactly did you say?”
Jin looked up at Ueda, puzzled. “That's exactly what I said.”
Ueda shook his head. “Think hard, Jin. What exactly did you say?”
Jin frowned and gazed away. As if relaying a scene playing right in front of him, he said, “I said 'maybe we should get married.' Then he said, 'what?’ Then I said 'maybe we should get married'. Then I said it again. I said it three times.”
“The exact words, Jin?” Ueda ordered, quite impatient.
“I said, “Maybe we should get married. You're my girl now' and then Kazuya...”
“Okay, stop!” Ueda interjected. “Say that again.”
“I said 'you're my...” And Jin trailed off. “Oh. That's bad?” His three other band mates nodded their heads in unison. “Why is that bad?”
“I'm not a girl!” Maru said, mimicking Kazuya. “Get it?”
♡♡♡♡♡
Kazuya woke up with a start. He was breathing heavily and sweating profusely. “Oh god!” he exclaimed. His heart was beating wildly in his chest as he fumbled on his bed looking for his phone. Automatically, he called Jin's number but at the third ring he remembered he was not speaking to Jin and ended his call. He called Koki instead who mumbled something incoherent after the eighth ring.
“Koki! I’m pregnant!” Kazuya shouted over the phone.
“Kame? Are you okay?” Koki asked from the other end of the line.
“I'M PREGNANT, KOKI!” Kazuya shouted louder.
“Kame, you have been pregnant for ...for eight months. We have gone through this panic stage before...” Kazuya did not answer. He has sat up on his bed, rocking himself back and forth. “You're not going into early labor, are you?” Koki asked, panic starting to creep in his voice.
Kazuya paused and took stock of how his body felt. “No,” he replied and heard an audible sigh from the other end. “But I'm pregnant and I will give birth and I have no fucking idea how to do that and I'm going to have a baby and I'm an idol and I really, really miss my penis...” Kazuya lamented panicky without even pausing to breathe.
“Calm down,” Koki said. “Do you want me to come over?”
Kazuya looked at the watch on his bedside table. It was past 3 in the morning. He did want company. He needs company but he could not, in his heart, ask his best friend to drive at this ungodly hour. He simply took three successive deep breaths to calm himself. “No, I'm okay, Koki. It was just panic attack. I'm okay now.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah....”
The two talked over the phone some more: Koki trying to placate Kazuya and Kazuya trying to assure Koki he was okay.
After he put down the phone, Kazuya could not fall back to sleep. His panic attack was well founded. He is a man, a national celebrity at that, and he is about to give birth. Of course he was now physically equipped to do that but that does not lessen the fear.
Kazuya went to his kitchen and made tea. As he waited for the water to boil, he took stock of all things that happened to him since the day after his birthday.
He lost his penis and was replaced by a vagina that disgustingly squirts liquid on certain days. Then there's the horrifying monthly period and the more horrifying tampons. He could not imagine how girls live normal lives when they bleed for a few days every month. And he thought it was a good thing that he only menstruated once only to be shocked that the reason for that was he got pregnant.
Being pregnant is a whole other slew of terrifying experience. Aside from the constant need to pee and a perennially heavy chest - breasts - there was that hormonal imbalance causing him emotional swings that would shame the most chronic of manic-depressives. Not to mention the stupid cravings - gorging on gyoza was unusual for him but when he started dipping it in chocolate ice cream and his band mates started gagging, he knew it was too much.
He wondered how women survive pregnancy. He wondered how his mother did - four times even. And at that thought, he suddenly felt an overwhelming need to hear his mother. When the kettle whistled, he turned the stove off then pressed his mother's number as he poured hot water on a cup.
Then he realized it was too early and was about to hang up but he heard his mother's voice. “Kazu-kun?” he heard his mother's voice.
“Oka-san...” Kazuya softly muttered.
“Is something wrong, honey? Are you okay?” his mother worriedly asked.
His mother's familiar soothing voice somehow unleashed a tide of sadness. Not just from the pain caused by neither Jin’s proposal nor the emotional battering he's been going through since he became “a girl.” The tears that were about to surge forth emanate from the long-felt emptiness that he has ignored and weariness he has suppressed for years. Kazuya started to cry. “Oka-san...I miss you,” he said, in between sniffs.
“Baby, are you okay?” his mother asked, her voice now tinged with panic.
Kazuya didn't want to worry to his mother and tried to stop himself from crying but instead managed to make himself hiccup while he still sobs. “I'm...(hic)...okay...(hic)...oka-san...(hic)...”
“I will go over there now,” his mother said.
“No (hic)!” Kazuya protested. “No, oka-san (hic). I'm okay (hic).” Then he heard the doorbell ring. “I have (hic) to go (hic)...” he said and before his mother could reply Kazuya ended his call.
Fuck this life, Kazuya thought to himself. Waking up to a panic attack and disturbing his best friend, breaking down while to talking his mom and now - a disheveled ex-boyfriend looking extremely haggard at his door.
“Are you okay?” Jin worriedly asked especially when he saw Kazuya's tear-streaked face, swollen eyes and red nose.
“(hic) You’re (hic) the third person (hic) to ask me that (hic) in 30 minutes (hic) and it's not even (hic) four in the morning,” Kazuya said. He turned around and walked towards his kitchen.
“You called then you hang up before I could answer. I kept calling you but your line was busy. What happened?” Jin asked, following Kazuya inside.
Kazuya drank two glassful of water before he could stop his hiccups. He then sat on the sofa while Jin sat on an adjacent armchair. “I'm fine...given how fucked up my life is right now,” Kazuya saw the tea he had made and offered it to Jin. Jin took it and took a sip while Kazuya watched him.
“You look like shit,” Kazuya commented at his ordinarily fashionable ex-boyfriend now clad in a t-shirt he obviously had been sleeping in and if Kazuya is not mistaken, the striped fabric bunched up on his waistline is part of a pajama bottom tucked inside the low-waist jeans.
“You don't look too hot yourself,” Jin commented. Kazuya had only managed to put on a t-shirt over his boxer short. His messed up face was framed by a more messed up hair.
Kazuya got miffed. He always gets miffed with anything Jin has to say since the hurtful proposal. “Go away!” he yelled.
Jin bit his lower lip, knowing his tactless mouth has done it again. “Sorry, I didn't mean...”
And they both grew quiet. Jin drank tea while he watches Kazuya staring blankly at the floor, deep in thought.
“Kazuya,” Jin softly called out when he finally emptied his cup. “I didn't mean what I said when I proposed to you.” Kazuya just stared back at him. “No, that's not what I mean.” Jin grimaced, pissed at his incoherence. “I mean, I did propose to you and I meant that but not all of it. Do you understand?”
To Jin's suprise, Kazuya nodded. “Yeah. I know you. You just feel responsible...” He leaned back and tucked his legs under him.
“What? No!” Jin interjected. “When did I ever feel responsible? That's not it. I mean because you need me...”
Kazuya stared at Jin. “I don't need you.”
“Oh,” was all Jin could mutter and he unconsciously placed a hand on his heart. He felt an emptiness in his gut and he wanted to cry. “Well, I guess, you don't need me to fuck up your life some more, huh?”
“You don't fuck up my life, Jin,” Kazuya muttered. “I mean, I don't need you because I lo...” But he abruptly stopped and his jaw dropped open. “Aww.” Then Kazuya doubled over, clutching his stomach.
Chapter 6
Rating: PG-14
Genre: Humor, romance
Word count: about 13,000 (total), 2,335 (Chapter 5)
Disclaimer: I only own the plot.
Summary: Kazuya Kamenashi feels the strain of being a JE idol. He thinks girls have life easy. That was until he wakes up with girl parts.
A/N: Birthday wishes coming true was a plot of the Jim Carrey movie “Liar, Liar.” Technically, it's not mpreg because as Junno pointed out: “Technically, you're not a man. You would not be pregnant if you are. And since you are then...”
A/N for this chapter: The slight angst here but it's more like angst wannabe or Kazuya being a drama queen and Jin attempting to be emo or something. Lame chapters I warn thee XD]
Chapter 5
Jin, sitting on a bench, watched as Kazuya walks towards him. The younger man had just finished practicing his dance and was rubbing his sweaty hair with a towel. As Kazuya approaches, Jin noticed that his youngest band mate's shirt was not buttoned all the way down.
As soon as Kazuya got near enough, he pulled the other's shirttail to propel the boy towards him. “Button you shirt,” Jin said.
“Why? Stop,” Kazuya said and slapped Jin's hands off his shirt.
“It's cold, Kame,” Jin worriedly said.
“Not for me. My body's like an oven perennially set to bake a cake.” Kazuya drank from his water bottle. Jin watched in awe - from Kazuya's pink lips on the bottle, to his silky throat, to his shirt-covered chest (at which, Jin slightly smirked) down to his very subtly swollen belly. Jin was suddenly overwhelmed and before he could stop himself, he grabbed Kazuya and planted a kiss on the latter's belly.
“What are you doing?” the surprised Kazuya exclaimed. The feel of Jin's lips on his belly created a warm tingling feeling all over his body and he could not help but smile. He unconsciously pressed Jin's head against his stomach.
“Maybe we should get married,” Jin murmured into Kazuya's belly.
“What?” Kazuya asked, gently pushing Jin's face off his belly.
Jin looked up and knew Kazuya heard him because the younger man was blushing. “I said maybe we should get married.”
Kazuya didn't like how he felt - happiness started to surge within him. He could feel his heart bloat as it hammers into his chest. He did not like it all because he had felt that once before but when that feeling ended, in its place came a numbing pain. And it hovered until it became a burdening gloom. He did not want to go through that again. Not especially because of Jin again.
Jin pressed his face on Kazuya's belly again. “We should get married...you're my girl now,” Jin said.
And there it was...it didn't even last a minute, Kazuya painfully thought. The heart that started to bloat suddenly contracted and squeezed in his chest. Tears welled on Kazuya's eyes. He wriggled out of Jin's embrace. “I'm not marrying you,” he said coldly and walked away without looking back at the puzzled Jin.
♡♡♡♡♡
Junno had to leave earlier than the rest of the band, forcing Maru to ride with the rest on their way back to Tokyo. This was a good thing, as far as Kazuya was concerned. He was able to maneuver Maru and Ueda to sit beside him at the back of the car leaving Jin with no choice but to sit up front beside the driving Koki.
All through out their travel, Jin kept looking back at Kazuya and asking him if he's okay or if he needs anything. Kazuya would just glare at Jin and shake his head stiffly. On the three occasions he asked for a pit stop, he asked Koki directly.
As they approached Tokyo, as they near going their separate ways to each of their apartments, Kazuya suddenly felt very depressed and felt an overwhelming need to cry. He could not turn his face away to hide his tears as he was seated between Ueda and Maru but he just could not control his tears. He decided to feign falling asleep and rested his head on Maru's shoulder. Then subtly, he buried his face on his band mate's shirt.
When Maru felt his shirt getting wet, he shifted. But before he could say anything, Kazuya clamped a hand on his mouth and Maru understood. He just hoped he would later be able to get away fast enough from Jin, who currently was shooting him dagger looks through the rear view mirror.
Kazuya asked to be dropped off first and no one protested. Jin did not even attempt to walk him to his apartment seeing as how Kazuya seem to have suddenly found Jin's presence revolting. When they stopped to drop off Ueda, Jin quickly got out of the car, pulled open the right back door, causing the sleeping Maru to fall off.
“What the...!” Maru exclaimed as he found himself sprawled on the ground.
“Why are you making a move on Kazuya?” Jin angrily demanded. Ueda strode near with Koki right behind.
“I am not,” Maru calmly said as he stood up.
Jin's eyes narrowed at Maru. “You were nuzzling him!” Ueda's left eyebrow lifted.
“I was not,” Maru, still calm, defended himself as he brush dirt off his pants.
“His hand was on your face!” insisted Jin.
“Oh for chrissake, Jin,” Maru exasperatedly said. “Kazuya was crying and he did not want me to tell on him. You're the one who should explain. What the hell did you do to him this time?”
The three young men looked at Jin. Jin suddenly looked lost and forlorn. He pushed his hands inside his pants pockets and kicked the ground, causing a flurry of dust. He was more confused now. He could not understand why Kazuya suddenly turned cold on him when he, in fact, proposed marriage. And he mumbled this fact to his three friends.
Koki sat on the car's hood. “How did you propose?”
“I said 'maybe we should get married',” replied Jin.
Ueda's forehead creased. “No, really, what exactly did you say?”
Jin looked up at Ueda, puzzled. “That's exactly what I said.”
Ueda shook his head. “Think hard, Jin. What exactly did you say?”
Jin frowned and gazed away. As if relaying a scene playing right in front of him, he said, “I said 'maybe we should get married.' Then he said, 'what?’ Then I said 'maybe we should get married'. Then I said it again. I said it three times.”
“The exact words, Jin?” Ueda ordered, quite impatient.
“I said, “Maybe we should get married. You're my girl now' and then Kazuya...”
“Okay, stop!” Ueda interjected. “Say that again.”
“I said 'you're my...” And Jin trailed off. “Oh. That's bad?” His three other band mates nodded their heads in unison. “Why is that bad?”
“I'm not a girl!” Maru said, mimicking Kazuya. “Get it?”
♡♡♡♡♡
Kazuya woke up with a start. He was breathing heavily and sweating profusely. “Oh god!” he exclaimed. His heart was beating wildly in his chest as he fumbled on his bed looking for his phone. Automatically, he called Jin's number but at the third ring he remembered he was not speaking to Jin and ended his call. He called Koki instead who mumbled something incoherent after the eighth ring.
“Koki! I’m pregnant!” Kazuya shouted over the phone.
“Kame? Are you okay?” Koki asked from the other end of the line.
“I'M PREGNANT, KOKI!” Kazuya shouted louder.
“Kame, you have been pregnant for ...for eight months. We have gone through this panic stage before...” Kazuya did not answer. He has sat up on his bed, rocking himself back and forth. “You're not going into early labor, are you?” Koki asked, panic starting to creep in his voice.
Kazuya paused and took stock of how his body felt. “No,” he replied and heard an audible sigh from the other end. “But I'm pregnant and I will give birth and I have no fucking idea how to do that and I'm going to have a baby and I'm an idol and I really, really miss my penis...” Kazuya lamented panicky without even pausing to breathe.
“Calm down,” Koki said. “Do you want me to come over?”
Kazuya looked at the watch on his bedside table. It was past 3 in the morning. He did want company. He needs company but he could not, in his heart, ask his best friend to drive at this ungodly hour. He simply took three successive deep breaths to calm himself. “No, I'm okay, Koki. It was just panic attack. I'm okay now.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah....”
The two talked over the phone some more: Koki trying to placate Kazuya and Kazuya trying to assure Koki he was okay.
After he put down the phone, Kazuya could not fall back to sleep. His panic attack was well founded. He is a man, a national celebrity at that, and he is about to give birth. Of course he was now physically equipped to do that but that does not lessen the fear.
Kazuya went to his kitchen and made tea. As he waited for the water to boil, he took stock of all things that happened to him since the day after his birthday.
He lost his penis and was replaced by a vagina that disgustingly squirts liquid on certain days. Then there's the horrifying monthly period and the more horrifying tampons. He could not imagine how girls live normal lives when they bleed for a few days every month. And he thought it was a good thing that he only menstruated once only to be shocked that the reason for that was he got pregnant.
Being pregnant is a whole other slew of terrifying experience. Aside from the constant need to pee and a perennially heavy chest - breasts - there was that hormonal imbalance causing him emotional swings that would shame the most chronic of manic-depressives. Not to mention the stupid cravings - gorging on gyoza was unusual for him but when he started dipping it in chocolate ice cream and his band mates started gagging, he knew it was too much.
He wondered how women survive pregnancy. He wondered how his mother did - four times even. And at that thought, he suddenly felt an overwhelming need to hear his mother. When the kettle whistled, he turned the stove off then pressed his mother's number as he poured hot water on a cup.
Then he realized it was too early and was about to hang up but he heard his mother's voice. “Kazu-kun?” he heard his mother's voice.
“Oka-san...” Kazuya softly muttered.
“Is something wrong, honey? Are you okay?” his mother worriedly asked.
His mother's familiar soothing voice somehow unleashed a tide of sadness. Not just from the pain caused by neither Jin’s proposal nor the emotional battering he's been going through since he became “a girl.” The tears that were about to surge forth emanate from the long-felt emptiness that he has ignored and weariness he has suppressed for years. Kazuya started to cry. “Oka-san...I miss you,” he said, in between sniffs.
“Baby, are you okay?” his mother asked, her voice now tinged with panic.
Kazuya didn't want to worry to his mother and tried to stop himself from crying but instead managed to make himself hiccup while he still sobs. “I'm...(hic)...okay...(hic)...oka-san...(hic)...”
“I will go over there now,” his mother said.
“No (hic)!” Kazuya protested. “No, oka-san (hic). I'm okay (hic).” Then he heard the doorbell ring. “I have (hic) to go (hic)...” he said and before his mother could reply Kazuya ended his call.
Fuck this life, Kazuya thought to himself. Waking up to a panic attack and disturbing his best friend, breaking down while to talking his mom and now - a disheveled ex-boyfriend looking extremely haggard at his door.
“Are you okay?” Jin worriedly asked especially when he saw Kazuya's tear-streaked face, swollen eyes and red nose.
“(hic) You’re (hic) the third person (hic) to ask me that (hic) in 30 minutes (hic) and it's not even (hic) four in the morning,” Kazuya said. He turned around and walked towards his kitchen.
“You called then you hang up before I could answer. I kept calling you but your line was busy. What happened?” Jin asked, following Kazuya inside.
Kazuya drank two glassful of water before he could stop his hiccups. He then sat on the sofa while Jin sat on an adjacent armchair. “I'm fine...given how fucked up my life is right now,” Kazuya saw the tea he had made and offered it to Jin. Jin took it and took a sip while Kazuya watched him.
“You look like shit,” Kazuya commented at his ordinarily fashionable ex-boyfriend now clad in a t-shirt he obviously had been sleeping in and if Kazuya is not mistaken, the striped fabric bunched up on his waistline is part of a pajama bottom tucked inside the low-waist jeans.
“You don't look too hot yourself,” Jin commented. Kazuya had only managed to put on a t-shirt over his boxer short. His messed up face was framed by a more messed up hair.
Kazuya got miffed. He always gets miffed with anything Jin has to say since the hurtful proposal. “Go away!” he yelled.
Jin bit his lower lip, knowing his tactless mouth has done it again. “Sorry, I didn't mean...”
And they both grew quiet. Jin drank tea while he watches Kazuya staring blankly at the floor, deep in thought.
“Kazuya,” Jin softly called out when he finally emptied his cup. “I didn't mean what I said when I proposed to you.” Kazuya just stared back at him. “No, that's not what I mean.” Jin grimaced, pissed at his incoherence. “I mean, I did propose to you and I meant that but not all of it. Do you understand?”
To Jin's suprise, Kazuya nodded. “Yeah. I know you. You just feel responsible...” He leaned back and tucked his legs under him.
“What? No!” Jin interjected. “When did I ever feel responsible? That's not it. I mean because you need me...”
Kazuya stared at Jin. “I don't need you.”
“Oh,” was all Jin could mutter and he unconsciously placed a hand on his heart. He felt an emptiness in his gut and he wanted to cry. “Well, I guess, you don't need me to fuck up your life some more, huh?”
“You don't fuck up my life, Jin,” Kazuya muttered. “I mean, I don't need you because I lo...” But he abruptly stopped and his jaw dropped open. “Aww.” Then Kazuya doubled over, clutching his stomach.
Chapter 6