check out my icon, assholes!

[ask_janet]

ode to the newport key
by janet

the first time i used an external weapon
it was shiny and thumpy
shump shump shirrump
(that was andy's drunk arse dragging it down the plass)

too long and unwieldy, rather
unlike my elegant claws. they are sexy. you should all lick them.
i digress.

oh broken window!that was a complete accident! but while i'm

Comments

[timeagency]

Sorry about the invisible lift thing. I saw that it was about to happen but my mouth was otherwise occupied and by the time I got free of the -- er -- obstacle -- no, that's not right, but you know what I mean, it was already over. You can't blame Jack for this one. He was off playing tonsil hockey with Ianto at some Italian restaurant. You, of all beings, should be able to appreciate the importance of a spaghetti dinner.

[ask_janet]

i think i broke my spleen. well, one of them.

[timeagency]

Ouch. I'm sorry for you. Can you function on the spare or do you need someone to grow a new one for you in the lab? I can get you a maintenance contract with Vigoro Organ Renewal if you'd like one. Just be patient with the time delay since it'll be coming from the 49th century or later.

[ask_janet]

half of my organs are voluntary, i think. it's been a while since i was in health class.

[dontask_pcandy]

Ha a, Newport Key ha ha ha.. hrrghu*throws up*

My God, that's gross. Good poem, man. Er, Quad. T, I'm so sorry you saw any of that, but the shop dummy spree was fukkin' good fun, I have to lie down a bit. Would you like a wig? Janet, would you like a wig? Not mine, one of these...

[timeagency]

How many are you now? I'm kind of hoping the illness is related to some of the loose Andys reintegrating.

[dontask_pcandy]

Just the two of us. I am experiencing some liberation from the 2oth century upbringing which is a bit giddy. I remember everything except the taste of the time-panini deception by the TARDIS.

T, she did this for us to stay together.

[timeagency]

I love how the TARDIS takes care of all whom she touches. I'll make you panini anytime you want to remember them.

That other Andy, he's not going to remember the Doctor or the TARDIS or any of that, is he? I feel a little sad for him. But so long as I have YOU, darling Andy, I'm content with life.

You're going to have to meet my mother, you know.

[ask_captainjack]

I'm sorry that your cell smells like Parker Posey. I never wanted that for you. I'm having cloves of garlic thrown in immediately to mask the smell.

[ask_janet]

mmm, my cell smells like rotten pesto! the best kind!

[timeagency]

We need to get you some basil that's gone to seed just to round out the fragrance palette.