The Atwood DITFT: Generation 5, Chapter 6
Yaaaaaay another Atwood chapter only like a month after the last one! That's sadly really good for me... hm. Well I moved my computer desk into a different room that I spend more time in and I'm hoping that'll help me play more! Really though what I need to do is sort through my CC, because I have so much and my game is so laggy and I look at all of it in game and just think about how I don't really need half of it. So. Yeah. that's good. Maybe one day I'll go through it all. Though that does involve s3pe and like recombining package files, which is not horribly hard but just kind of time consuming. I'll stop talking about that now though!
The Atwood DITFT: Generation 5, Chapter 6
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Early mornings on the farm had always been one of Joey’s favorite things. The big old house stood watching quietly over the land, and everyone slept but her. She would pass the dogs, usually curled up together on a couch somewhere, snoring softly. Then she would slip out the back door to the big wraparound porch; from there, she’d hop down the steps to the grass and crunch across frosted blades to the barn. She especially loved days when fog hung low on the ground and it seemed like new objects were appearing to her with each step.
In the barn the horses would nicker softly at her approach. Cheerfully she’d go to them one at a time, tossing new hay into their stalls, brushing their coats, and scooping up any mess there was. The horses’ quiet companionship had been a constant for Joey’s entire life.
She would miss it dearly. Her morning routine had been the same since she was old enough to realize that her mother didn’t always get out of bed and take care of the horses like she should have. When Genie died, Joey took over completely-though Graham had often helped on his good days. Despite how much better her father seemed to be doing lately, he hadn’t been out there in the morning in years; Joey figured he was giving her space. He knew how special the horses were to her.
Genie had loved the horses more than anything. Joey thought her mother had understood horses better than she’d understood people. For Joey, time spent with the horses was the closest thing to spending time with her mother. Sometimes she could swear her mom was watching over her through Lucy’s old eyes. But that was probably wishful thinking, Joey reflected. Lucy sneezed in response.
She wasn’t worried about leaving the horses in Graham’s hands. He was doing so much better. He got out of bed every single day; he cooked and kept the house clean; and he was even painting again. Joey had noticed a half-finished canvas on his easel on the porch on her way over to the barn this morning. She had to admit that had made her happy. She knew her father would be just fine, and the horses too. No, the one Joey was worried for was herself. Did she really want to cut that last connection she had to her mom?
“I hope you’ll understand why I’m leaving,” she said softly. The fronds of the weeping willow tree tickled her hair. She had not cried over her mother’s grave in many years. But this was another part of her morning routine, and another of the final connections to Genie that she was about to leave behind. “You would want me to follow my dreams, I think. I’ll miss you so much.” She looked toward the other two little graves nearby. “I wish you two could come along, or tell me it’s a stupid idea, or something.” Charlie and Sam. Her little brothers. She’d watched her bandmates interact with their siblings plenty of times over the years, laughing, bickering, teasing, fighting. She liked to imagine what her relationship would be like with her brothers, if they were here. “I wish I could hear you tell me what you think about what I’m going to do.” She sighed, and stood silently for awhile. Then the horses began to gallop around the pasture, and she smiled a little. “They’re excited for me, I think,” she said, only half kidding. “Maybe that means you are too, Mom.” She paused for awhile again. “I love you. I love all of you. I’ll come back one day.”
* * *
Somehow saying goodbye to Graham seemed insurmountably harder than it had been to say goodbye to the rest of her family. Maybe it was because Joey had had to say goodbye to her mother and brothers many years ago already. I should really get used to the fact that they’re gone, she reflected.
But Graham wasn’t gone. In fact, he was more present now than he had been since Genie’s death nine years ago. And that was the worst part, really. He was finally willing to try, but it was just too late. Joey was too angry, and had been for too long.
In the end, Joey wrote him a letter. She felt a bit awful about it-she couldn’t gather the courage to say anything to his face?-but she knew it was this or nothing at all.
Dad,
I’m sorry I’m doing this in a letter instead of talking to you in person. You would just try to change my mind and it’s too late for that. So it’s easier this way.
I’m moving. Ellie and I found a place in Bridgeport, and we’re going to play in a band and be famous. Well, that’s the plan at least. I have enough money from graduation and my savings to make it for a little while, and hopefully I’ll find a job before that cash runs out. Please don’t try to come after me or convince me to come back. I can’t stay in Meadow Glen anymore, I just can’t do it. I feel like you should understand that.
I didn’t want us to fight the last time I see you, so I’m writing instead. Please take care of the horses, I don’t want anything to happen to them. I’ll let you know if I decide to come back and visit or anything.
Joey
* * *
“So you’re not mad at all,” Ellie said, skepticism dripping from her voice. “Not even a tiny bit.”
“Nope,” Joey said calmly, staring out the window of the cab and avoiding Ellie’s gaze. The two were on their way from Meadow Glen to the nearest train station, two towns over.
“He left the band!” Ellie said. “He yelled at you and all of us, he called it stupid and pointless and said none of us would ever make it anywhere.”
“I’m just glad to finally realize he’s an asshole. He has been all along, you know,” Joey said.
“Yes, but he was our asshole,” Ellie lamented. “And he was good.”
“I don’t care about him anymore,” Joey said firmly. “We can make it without him, especially once Evan and Shaun make it out to the city.”
Ellie hesitated. “I think Shaun might be going to college.”
“What?” Joey demanded. “He can’t do that. We need him.”
“I know,” Ellie said. “And he didn’t want to say it at the band meeting, because he didn’t want you to feel like he and Jared were ganging up on you. He was pissed off at Jared for all the things he said, he didn’t want to be associated with that.”
“Since when do you and Shaun talk without the rest of us?” Joey asked.
“Oh, we’ve always hung out, we’re next door neighbors,” Ellie said quickly.
“Okay,” Joey said, giving Ellie an exaggerated wink.
“Whatever,” Ellie said, “the point is, he might not be joining us in Bridgeport like he said he would. I’m sorry.”
Joey bit her lip. “Where will he go to college? Can he go somewhere close to where we’ll be?”
“I don’t know,” said Ellie softly. “He wasn’t sure yet. I’m sure he’ll keep me-us-posted.”
“Ugh,” said Joey, “we’ve lost half the band. What about Evan?”
“I know as much about Evan as you do,” Ellie said, laughing a bit. “Which is nothing.”
“He’s always so… brooding,” Joey replied. “Like he’s simmering with silent rage.”
“You used to be kind of like that,” Ellie said. “No one was ever sure what you were so mad about.”
Joey shrugged awkwardly. “Yeah. I hope I’m not that bad anymore.”
“I mean, the fact that you’re not even a little mad at Jared should be proof that you’re different now.”
Joey rolled her eyes. “Why waste energy on people you don’t care about?”
“I’m not buying it,” Ellie insisted firmly.
“If this is all we’re going to talk about for the whole trip I’m going to die,” Joey grumbled.
Ellie laughed. “What would you rather talk about?”
“I don’t know.”
“Don’t be such a downer,” Ellie said breezily. “We’re about to be in Bridgeport for goodness’ sakes! Cheer up!”
“Oh, whatever!” Joey said. “As if I’m not totally excited for this! You know I am.”
“You’re right,” Ellie admitted. “Okay, let’s talk about our apartment. What color scheme do you like for the kitchen?”
Joey laughed, but went along with it. Their discussion lasted the rest of the cab ride, and then much of the train ride into the city.
* * *
“I’m so glad we finally found it,” Joey said, throwing down her bags and fighting the urge to lie down in the middle of their apartment’s empty floor. She had been walking far too long.
“It’s nice to be home, huh?” Ellie said, grinning. She walked eagerly around the place, running her hands across the bare walls.
The two of them had been traveling all day. After their long train ride they’d caught the subway, a process that involved several train changes (once because they got off a stop too early). When they finally found the right place, they had climbed back to ground level and stared around in awe. It was a surreal experience for Joey, who had never before been to a city this big. The skyscrapers had her craning her neck and staring upward for a long time. Her amazement had at least taken her mind off the walking. They walked-they had thought this subway stop was really close to their building-and walked, getting lost, trying to take shortcuts, getting even more lost. Finally, somehow, they had gotten themselves here, to their building.
“I don’t know, it doesn’t feel like home yet,” Joey said. The apartment was quite empty. They had sleeping bags with them for the night, and tomorrow would begin their search for furniture and other necessities. “Maybe it will when we have silverware… and a shower curtain… and a place to sit.”
“Fair,” said Ellie, smiling. “Still, it’s a place, and it’s ours! How rad is that?” She started pacing the room, squinting her eyes and mentally planning every inch.
“You’ve been moved out of your parents’ house for over a year,” Joey pointed out.
“Yeah, but I moved in with people who had already been living somewhere,” Ellie said. “This place is fresh.”
Joey shrugged. “All right. Did you say you checked Craigslist for furniture?”
“I found a great deal on a little dining set, a table and two chairs,” Ellie said. “You’re coming with me tomorrow to look at it and talk to the guys. You don’t go to Craigslist deals alone.”
“Oh, no,” Joey said seriously, “I’d never allow that.”
“Then it’s settled.” Ellie laughed cheerily. “I’m going to brush my teeth and get in bed.” She nodded toward her rolled up sleeping bag and laughed.
“Sounds perfect right now,” Joey agreed.
* * *
By the next afternoon, Ellie had made them several new friends. Jeff, Carlos, Izzy, and Andie were the people selling the dining set, and they had a few other people over when Ellie and Joey arrived.
Joey watched as Ellie schmoozed and flirted with everyone, one of the guys in particular (Joey had immediately forgotten who was who).
“I can’t believe you talked them out of this couch, too,” Joey said later, as they hauled their new furniture into their little apartment.
“People are more than willing to help you out, if you know how to ask them,” Ellie said breezily.
“I don’t, though.”
“Well, that’s why you have me.” Ellie winked.
“Fair enough!” Joey said, chuckling. “Okay, what’s left on the list?”
The two surveyed their apartment. “Um, everything?” Ellie said. “I mean, minus a table and chairs and a couch.”
“I mean, we have like some silverware now,” said Joey defensively.
“Ohhh, you’re right, we’re so much further along than I thought!” Ellie said.
“Well, it’s a start.”
“Sure is.”
“And at least we’ve got our instruments,” Joey added. She wandered toward her piano, her fingers itching to play again.
“That is very true!” Ellie said cheerfully. “Wanna play something?”
“Well…” Joey thought about it. “I don’t know if I want to play any Bone Rocket songs.”
“Let’s write our own new songs,” Ellie said. “Who needs those guys anyway?”
“Oh come on,” Joey said. “You miss them, don’t you?”
“Obviously,” said Ellie. “Don’t you? But like you said, I don’t want to play our old songs from with them.”
“No, I guess not. Why did Jared have to be such an asshole about it?”
Ellie’s face said, So you’re ready to talk about it now? “I don’t know,” she replied.
“Like, what a dick move! He acted like he was on the same page as us for so long, he treated it like a long-term plan, he said it was so important to him, and you could tell how much he loved it.”
“And then he totally flaked out.”
“Yeah!” Joey fumed. “He did. What an ass.”
“He seemed genuinely worried about you, though,” said Ellie.
“Whatever,” Joey said. “He didn’t need to be. We’ll be fine out here. And he would have been, too. He could’ve been a part of this. And because he bailed, now all three of them are gone, and we’re on our own. Bone Rocket is dead, and it’s Jared’s fault.”
“I don’t know,” Ellie said thoughtfully. “I really feel like Shaun will make it out here eventually.”
“Well, that’s because Shaun is in love with you,” Joey said irritably.
“What?”
“Oh, don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.” Joey hadn’t really wanted to talk about this with Ellie, but when she was mad she found herself throwing things in people’s faces regardless of how good an idea it might be. “Shaun has been in love with you for like the whole time I’ve known you two. Probably longer.”
“That’s your opinion,” said Ellie. “We’re neighbors, we’re friends. We just know each other really well. That’s all there is to it.”
“Yeah fucking right. You obviously don’t see the way he looks at you.”
“Joey, shut up, okay? He doesn’t. Besides, I don’t feel that way about him, even if he did feel that way about me.”
“I don’t buy that either.” Joey sat down at the piano, tapping the keys to a song Shaun had written. “Don’t you remember this one? About the girl who’s in love with her chemistry teacher, and she knows she can never have him because he’s older and cooler and off-limits?”
“If you think that’s Shaun’s secret way of telling me-”
“It’s, like, painfully not secret!” Joey insisted. “He loves you and you’re blind and that’s it.”
Ellie groaned and grabbed her sleeping bag and climbed into it. “I’m going to bed,” she said. “That’s the end of this conversation.”
“It’s only 8:30!” Joey protested.
“You lost your Ellie privileges for the day,” she shot back. “Tomorrow let’s get a TV or something, so we have something to do besides bother each other.”
Joey couldn’t help but laugh. Ellie was only so flustered about this because she knew it was true. “You’re not bothering me at all!” Joey said cheerfully. Ellie grumbled a loud, wordless grumble, and rolled over to face away from her friend. Then she began making loud, exaggerated snoring sounds. “All right, all right,” Joey said, giggling.
* * *
“Let’s do this,” said Ellie, her voice full of determination.
“I really don’t think this is going to work,” said Joey. “We’re underage, they might not even let us through the doors.”
“We’re legal in England,” Ellie said dismissively.
“Uh, yeah, has that excuse ever worked for you before?”
Ellie made a face. “Well, it’s not like we’re new at this, so it’s kind of a dumb rule.”
“I’m not saying it’s not dumb, I’m saying they’re not going to serve us anything.”
“But there’s a chance!” Ellie insisted. Joey sighed. Sometimes there was no arguing with Ellie. She had wanted to experience Bridgeport’s night life today, and that was what they were doing, drinking age be damned.
“Ooh, look, they have this!” Joey said, wandering over to the shuffleboard table (or whatever it was called).
“I’m gonna talk to the bartender,” Ellie said casually.
“Yeah, good luck,” Joey dismissed.
“Watch and learn, girl.”
“Care for a drink?”
“You’re an evil mastermind,” Joey said incredulously, staring at the tray of drinks in Ellie’s hand.
“I might not be able to do it again, so I hope you’re content with just one.”
Joey scoffed. “I mean, I’m not gonna turn down a drink, but one isn’t gonna go too far.”
“I heard these have at least three shots in them,” Ellie said.
“Ahhh,” Joey said. “You make your one favor go far.”
“That I do,” Ellie agreed.
After the drinks were gone, Joey said, “Hey, I saw they have instruments set up on a stage over there. We should go play!”
Joey had always believed she was better at playing piano when she was a little tipsy. That might have been the alcohol talking, but then again, she was always less terrified of playing in front of others this way.
Not that a single old lady in this basement bar was necessarily an intimidating audience. But it was something!
* * *
“Okay, meet back here at 3:00,” Ellie said.
Joey nodded, making a mental note of the café’s location. It was pretty close to their apartment, but Joey still found it way too easy to get lost in such a large city.
“Whoever finds a job first wins,” Ellie added. Joey made a face, but Ellie was already sprinting away.
Laughing, Joey headed in the opposite direction, looking around lazily. The city’s atmosphere was so different from what she was used to back home. As much as she’d loved the horses, Joey was starting to wonder how she’d ever considered herself anything but a city type.
She walked into any shop or restaurant or club that looked interesting, but no one was hiring. She was starting to get anxious now. They’d been in Bridgeport for over two weeks, and they hadn’t been able to find any source of income. Well, other than playing their instruments on the street or in bars, which was what they’d been doing until Ellie suggested this whole contest.
Frustrated, Joey checked her phone for the time. 2:45. Well, there probably wasn’t a point to trying any longer, since no one in the entire city had any job openings. Just watch as Ellie has a job lined up for each of us when I get back, she thought bitterly.
“Before you say anything, I just want you to know that I totally won,” Ellie said as soon as she saw Joey approaching. Joey glared at her friend, who was lounging on a chair at the café and sipping a half-empty cup of coffee.
“How long have you been here?” Joey demanded. “It’s 2:57!”
“Yeah, and I came to relax as soon as I found the award-winning offer!”
“Ugh,” Joey said. “As usual, you are better than me in every way, right? Okay, you can stop gloating, just tell me!”
“Well, I was perusing some little theaters and clubs that have jazz nights and such. And I was name-dropping those people who gave us the couch, right, because they’re the only people I know in town.”
Of course Ellie had been name-dropping, Joey thought. That’s just so typical.
“Anyway one of the lounges is owned by Jeff’s older brother! So I told him Jeff and I are best friends and he offered to give me and you a weekly spot playing there.”
“What?!” Joey said incredulously. “That sounds like some kind of a bad movie setup.”
“What do you mean?” Ellie demanded. “It sounds awesome is what it sounds like.”
“I know, it does,” Joey clarified, “it just also sounds totally fake.”
“Well, he was totally serious,” Ellie said. “He gave me his card, look! He wants to hear us play first to make sure we don’t suck, but he said he’s been looking for local musical talent to add some atmosphere.”
“That’s incredible!”
“I know! I mean, he offered us Tuesdays, so it’s not like we’re going to get tons of exposure right away, but it’s a start, you know?”
“Um, yeah! This is awesome! When’s our audition?”
“Tomorrow morning, before the place opens.”
“Oh my God,” Joey said, “we have to practice! Like, now!”
Ellie abandoned her coffee and the two girls dashed home.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Joey's nose ring was one of my better decisions, I think. Hope you all enjoyed the chapter!