Today, I'm putting on my teacher hat.
This list is in honor of my mother, the Grammar Goddess.
Ten Grammar Mistakes, Some of Which Are Made by People With Decent Grammar, Two of Which Are Routinely Made by Yours Truly
1. Its vs. It's
The apostrophe. It confuses people. It would be nice if there were two distinct punctuation marks: one to indicate possession and the other to indicate contraction. (But for god's sake, neither one would indicate plurality!) Just remember that "its" is a possessive pronoun like "his" and "hers," neither of which have apostrophes. Add the apostrophe and it's a contraction.
2. I vs. Me
The first is a subject, the second is an object. And the real difficulty comes when there's more than one person being discussed in the sentence. Because no one would say, "Would you like to meet I for dinner tonight?" And yet, "Would you like to meet John and I for dinner tonight?" is distressingly common. But seriously, if you remember to split it up like that and make the "I" or "me" stand alone in the sentence in your head, you will never, ever make this mistake again.
3. Every day vs. Everyday
The first is an adverb modifying a noun. The second is an adjective. The trick to getting it right is to mentally replace "every" with "each." If it still makes sense, you want the two-word option. Because no one would say, "It's a common, eachday problem." But they might say, "We encounter this problem each day." So, folks, oatmeal is my everyday breakfast. I eat it every day. Get it?
4. There vs. Their vs. They're
You know what really makes me crazy? When people I work with, people who make twice my salary, can't keep this straight. The first is an adverb, the second is a possessive pronoun, the third is a contraction. "They're eating their lunch at the table over there."
5. Should of vs. Should have
The first one is never, ever correct.
6. Lie vs. lay
So many smart people switch these up. If you say, "I'm going to lay down," the most obnoxious of my inner voices asks, "You're going to lay what down?" A trick to remember is that "lie" sounds like "recline" and "lay" sounds like "place." And it would be really convenient if the past tense of "recline" were something like "reclane" because "lay" is also the past tense of "lie." Here's how it works. Last night, I lay awake until dawn. So today, as soon as I lay this book on the table, I'm going to lie down for a long nap.
7. Who vs. Whom
Oh, the age-old question. Who is a subject, whom is an object. Mom taught me a trick with this one. Try mentally replacing it with "he" or "him." If "he" sounds correct, you want "who." (They both end with vowels.) If "him" sounds right, you want "whom." (They both end with "m.")
8. Subject/verb agreement
I had a lovely grammar smackdown over this one. I was sitting with a bunch of people in a restaurant, one of whom I didn't like much. And I said something like, "None of us is ready to go home yet." And this guy said, "Is that a grammar mistake I hear?" I knew what he was thinking but I just said, "A grammar mistake? No, I don't think so." He smirked and said, "'Us' is plural! You should have said, 'None of us are ready to go home.' And you, an English teacher!" I smiled and said, "Yes, I'm an English teacher. Therefore I know that the subject of that sentence is 'none' and 'of us' is its prepositional phrase. 'None' is singular, so the verb must be singular as well." He shut up. I mentally buffed my fingernails on my t-shirt.
9. Split Infinitive
This is one "mistake" I make myself. I put the word in quotation marks because I know the rule, I just choose to disregard it. The infinitive forms of Latin verbs are single words. In English, the infinitive is "to" plus the verb. So since Latin is the sacred source of most European languages, it was decided that nothing must come between "to" and the verb. Which is just silly, if you ask me. So I often decide to recklessly split my infinitives (see what I did there?) just because I don't see a reason not to.
10. Ending a sentence with a presposition
I just did it at the end of #9. Stupid rule, and again we can blame the Latin. I'm not talking about the pointless prepositions. Don't say, "Where is the library at?" Totally unnecessary preposition. Just say, "Where is the library?" But if I am expected to laboriously reword my sentences to avoid saying things like, "Turn that off," sorry. I am not that much of a grammar nazi. That is the kind of snobbishness up with which I shall not put.
Ten Grammar Mistakes, Some of Which Are Made by People With Decent Grammar, Two of Which Are Routinely Made by Yours Truly
1. Its vs. It's
The apostrophe. It confuses people. It would be nice if there were two distinct punctuation marks: one to indicate possession and the other to indicate contraction. (But for god's sake, neither one would indicate plurality!) Just remember that "its" is a possessive pronoun like "his" and "hers," neither of which have apostrophes. Add the apostrophe and it's a contraction.
2. I vs. Me
The first is a subject, the second is an object. And the real difficulty comes when there's more than one person being discussed in the sentence. Because no one would say, "Would you like to meet I for dinner tonight?" And yet, "Would you like to meet John and I for dinner tonight?" is distressingly common. But seriously, if you remember to split it up like that and make the "I" or "me" stand alone in the sentence in your head, you will never, ever make this mistake again.
3. Every day vs. Everyday
The first is an adverb modifying a noun. The second is an adjective. The trick to getting it right is to mentally replace "every" with "each." If it still makes sense, you want the two-word option. Because no one would say, "It's a common, eachday problem." But they might say, "We encounter this problem each day." So, folks, oatmeal is my everyday breakfast. I eat it every day. Get it?
4. There vs. Their vs. They're
You know what really makes me crazy? When people I work with, people who make twice my salary, can't keep this straight. The first is an adverb, the second is a possessive pronoun, the third is a contraction. "They're eating their lunch at the table over there."
5. Should of vs. Should have
The first one is never, ever correct.
6. Lie vs. lay
So many smart people switch these up. If you say, "I'm going to lay down," the most obnoxious of my inner voices asks, "You're going to lay what down?" A trick to remember is that "lie" sounds like "recline" and "lay" sounds like "place." And it would be really convenient if the past tense of "recline" were something like "reclane" because "lay" is also the past tense of "lie." Here's how it works. Last night, I lay awake until dawn. So today, as soon as I lay this book on the table, I'm going to lie down for a long nap.
7. Who vs. Whom
Oh, the age-old question. Who is a subject, whom is an object. Mom taught me a trick with this one. Try mentally replacing it with "he" or "him." If "he" sounds correct, you want "who." (They both end with vowels.) If "him" sounds right, you want "whom." (They both end with "m.")
8. Subject/verb agreement
I had a lovely grammar smackdown over this one. I was sitting with a bunch of people in a restaurant, one of whom I didn't like much. And I said something like, "None of us is ready to go home yet." And this guy said, "Is that a grammar mistake I hear?" I knew what he was thinking but I just said, "A grammar mistake? No, I don't think so." He smirked and said, "'Us' is plural! You should have said, 'None of us are ready to go home.' And you, an English teacher!" I smiled and said, "Yes, I'm an English teacher. Therefore I know that the subject of that sentence is 'none' and 'of us' is its prepositional phrase. 'None' is singular, so the verb must be singular as well." He shut up. I mentally buffed my fingernails on my t-shirt.
9. Split Infinitive
This is one "mistake" I make myself. I put the word in quotation marks because I know the rule, I just choose to disregard it. The infinitive forms of Latin verbs are single words. In English, the infinitive is "to" plus the verb. So since Latin is the sacred source of most European languages, it was decided that nothing must come between "to" and the verb. Which is just silly, if you ask me. So I often decide to recklessly split my infinitives (see what I did there?) just because I don't see a reason not to.
10. Ending a sentence with a presposition
I just did it at the end of #9. Stupid rule, and again we can blame the Latin. I'm not talking about the pointless prepositions. Don't say, "Where is the library at?" Totally unnecessary preposition. Just say, "Where is the library?" But if I am expected to laboriously reword my sentences to avoid saying things like, "Turn that off," sorry. I am not that much of a grammar nazi. That is the kind of snobbishness up with which I shall not put.