Eye Spy
I hate looking into people's eyes most of the time. I know I'm an open book and I can't hide anything, so once someone with any ounce of discernment looks into my eyes I'm pretty sure they can know immediately what I'm feeling.
This is why I especially don't look into the eyes of the following categories of people:
1. Those I have a crush on. It's exceptionally awkward and embarrassing. Once I looked into a friend's eyes and spaced out for 10 seconds thinking "Wow why are your eyes so warm liquid brown" and didn't hear what he was saying at all, then I realised that he was looking at me curiously and I flushed and choked. Damn.
2. Those I hate/dislike/can't stand/despise. If I don't want to let that person know the above negative feelings about said person. Which really is almost all of the time. Because mostly, I'm just thinking "Ugh let this conversation end soon so I can stop being fake and polite".
There are other smaller groups of people, but this pretty much sums it up.
Unfortunately, the side effect of this aversion to direct eye contact probably makes me seem shifty and guilty most of the time. I can't help it, I am guilty of being too open with my emotions that I can only defend myself by averting.
I've been trying to force myself to maintain eye contact with people I feel neutral about for longer and longer periods of time but it just makes my skin crawl, and my eyes dart around aching to look somewhere else. But it does get slightly easier to look at people now.
In the next edition of Eye Spy, we'll talk about people with pimples between their eyebrows/on their nose and how it's so compelling to stare at the blemish instead of their eyes.
This is why I especially don't look into the eyes of the following categories of people:
1. Those I have a crush on. It's exceptionally awkward and embarrassing. Once I looked into a friend's eyes and spaced out for 10 seconds thinking "Wow why are your eyes so warm liquid brown" and didn't hear what he was saying at all, then I realised that he was looking at me curiously and I flushed and choked. Damn.
2. Those I hate/dislike/can't stand/despise. If I don't want to let that person know the above negative feelings about said person. Which really is almost all of the time. Because mostly, I'm just thinking "Ugh let this conversation end soon so I can stop being fake and polite".
There are other smaller groups of people, but this pretty much sums it up.
Unfortunately, the side effect of this aversion to direct eye contact probably makes me seem shifty and guilty most of the time. I can't help it, I am guilty of being too open with my emotions that I can only defend myself by averting.
I've been trying to force myself to maintain eye contact with people I feel neutral about for longer and longer periods of time but it just makes my skin crawl, and my eyes dart around aching to look somewhere else. But it does get slightly easier to look at people now.
In the next edition of Eye Spy, we'll talk about people with pimples between their eyebrows/on their nose and how it's so compelling to stare at the blemish instead of their eyes.