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Some days I get this uncontrollable anger that just wells up inside of me and I lash out at whomever I can. I hate this so I normally self-medicate. I don’t know what to do tonight however as I have run out of medication. I want so badly to be happy and wanted. I hate the idea that I have to battle something so deep inside of me that I can’t ( Read more... ) -
I'm going mad. . .
I just want a woman that will wear a suit. One who will fucking pack for me. I want to meet a woman that looks and enjoys acting like a man occasionally. Is that to goddamn much to ask?!
I just don’t know where to find them and I’m so damn self conscious about being ugly that if I did find one I’d never talk to her unless she came up to me. I ( Read more... ) -
How things change. . .
What I am about to post here was written a year ago, almost to the day, and I just stumbled across it ten minutes ago. This is so strange, things change so much. Some of the things in this entry didn't happen as planed but over all I wish I still felt so good. Here goes ( Read more... ) -
I should update more.
I really should. I like LJ, I'm just a lazy ho! Anyway, my mom and I went up to Gallery Row tonight, had a good time ( Read more... ) -
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So just a quick note about what’s been going on in my life recently. I went on a bit of a manic shopping spree today and spent more money than I care to reveal. However, it was on a credit card so I don’t feel too bad. Mostly I’m excited about my new clothes because they look and feel so good. My diet is working and I feel so much better. I ( Read more... ) -
My rat is plotting to kill me. . . .
Any way I'm still awake. I just had to remark on two things. The boys on "Nip/Tuck" are so cute. (Enough with that show already!) And that I understand my French homework so much better when I'm high. Off to class now, very tired. -
Random thoughts. . .And I thought this show would be for yuppies!
I would give anything for a community of lesbians. I know on day I’ll live in a big city and get tired of seeing no new faces, but I really want to meet more women, more butches. I hate being stuck in this dead-end town. I am going to try to go out, but it is so hard to go out by myself. I get nervous and depressed and anti-social.
I just got ( Read more... ) -
I can't think of one right now. . .
I’m so tired of my family acting like we’re a bunch of victims. Disclaimer: some of the following traits have been known to be exhibited by yours truly. My mom acts like we have real problems (here ‘real’ is not used as a term of existence but of severity; our problems exist but are not severe) when so many people in the world have real problems ( Read more... ) -
I will never sleep again!
I realized tonight, after being awake for two ore three days (I can’t remember exactly) exactly how desirable I am. Here’s what I mean. I was driving home from an emergency run to the grocery store. I had had the idea that Oreos go great with a Vietnam War movie (Full Metal Jacket) and I had no Oreos. So, on the way home I realized that any red ( Read more... ) -
Oh My God, I'm so angry!
I'll have to elaborate on this when I'm not so tired and LIVID! I cannot believe that I work with one of the dumbest humans on the face of the planet. He spits good game, and until tonight I didn’t question his college experience. But it is now horribly obvious to me that he is so far from educated that I cannot even look at him the same way. ( Read more... )