Forever Cinderella
Title: Forever Cinderella
Pairing(s): HanChul, side!KangTeuk
Genre(s): Romance, transgender!AU
Length: 3384 words
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Heechul had always wanted to be a princess.
Inspiration(s): I took an English course about transgenderism and I just wanted to write down an idea I got.
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For as long as he remembered, Kim Heechul had wanted to be Cinderella. He had always wanted that huge layered dress and the fancy pumpkin-turned-carriage and those dainty glass shoes and have Prince Charming approach to ask for a dance. He had always wanted to be the one in the spotlight, the most beautiful girl at the ball, the one who other girls envied, the one that all the men in the room had their eyes on. He wanted all that and more. He wanted to be the greatest girl in the whole world.
But that was the problem. He wasn’t a girl. Not biologically, at least. God had made a mistake when Heechul was placed in the body of a normal male infant in the wee hours of July 10th, 1983. He was never going to forgive God for that blunder-seriously, how hard could putting a person’s soul into the right body be? Why him? Why did he have to be the one to be uncomfortable in his own skin?
Heechul knew something was off with him by the time he turned seven. His mother was a fashionista, always up to date with the newest trends and never seen in the same outfit twice. She never failed to charm the pants off of all who came her way (oftentimes bringing about a fit of jealous possessiveness from her husband, but that’s beside the point), she was elegant to the point where her feet never seemed to touch the ground, and she almost always had the most beautiful smile on her pretty face. Heechul thought she was the epitome of perfection. He sometimes snuck into his mother’s closet and tried on her beautiful dresses, accessorizing with large sunglasses and sometimes a chic wide-brimmed hat, topping off with a pair of classy high-heeled shoes. Little Heechul would spend hours in front of the mirror, admiring his outfit and posing like the models did in those fashion shows his mother watched all the time.
Heechul’s mother was surprised but supportive of her son’s peculiar behavior when she found out about what he did in his spare time. At first she ignored the notion, but as a mother and a self-proclaimed fashion expert, she could not stand the fact that her son had an interest in beauty that had potential to develop into something spectacular. Little by little, she immersed herself in her child’s development, and eventually the two had created a routine where Heechul’s mother would meet with her beloved child in her room once she got back home from work and they would play dress-up for hours on end. She would teach Heechul beauty tips and secrets that only you know, so let’s keep it between us, okay?, and help him color-coordinate his clothing until the best outfit was reached. “Remember, you should always think about your clothing as if you were going to wear that outfit for the rest of your life,” she recited wisely, grinning when her son watched her with wide admiring eyes. “If you can’t see yourself wearing an outfit for more than a week, it’s not going to cut it. Outfits should not only be mere clothing; they are pieces of art.”
The best days were when Heechul’s mother would come home and surprise him with gifts, like that one Wednesday when she brought home a pair of tight jeans that would go perfectly with that red shirt you have, come on, let’s try it on!. At first she was reluctant to buy any dresses or skirts, but when little Heechul continued to insist upon more feminine pretty clothing, she commenced bringing home frilly skirts, cute waist-hugging tops, and delicate flats. She never regretted that decision, especially when she remembered the first time she returned home with a Girl’s Size 7 red summer dress and saw Heechul’s face light up the room as he anxiously tried it on.
“Do I look like a princess, mommy?” he had asked, twirling in front of the full-length mirror. “Do I, do I?”
“You look even more beautiful than any princess,” she had replied, unformed tears in her eyes.
Heechul’s father was another story. A man’s man through and through, he had looked forward to teaching his son how to play baseball and how to fix cars. He had already been disappointed with the fact that Heechul couldn’t throw a ball father than arm’s length not to mention the fact that he refused to get his hands dirty with car oil. When he found out about Heechul’s “unnatural tendencies” and his wife’s contributions, he had lashed out at both of them and refused to believe that his only son was going to turn into a full-fledged sissy.
“It’s not natural,” he had argued, face flushed with anger as he saw Heechul cowering in the corner clad in a flowery pink dress. “None of what you two are doing is natural.”
Mrs. Kim pursed her lips and put her hands on her hips. “Natural or not, Heechul wanted this. It was his own choice, and you really should be more supportive as his father.”
“How could it be his own choice? You’re the one who was so desperate to have a little daughter to play dress-up with! I’m sorry, but for your information, you have a son! Do you understand what a son is? A son is a child who has a dick!”
“Don’t use that language in front of him!”
Mr. Kim ignored his wife and grabbed his son, bringing himself face to face with him. “Now you listen to me, boy,” he growled. “What you are doing here is wrong. All of these clothes, all of these ribbons belong to females, and you are not a female. You are supposed to grow into a strong man and do manly things like football. Do you understand?”
Whimpering from how tight his father was holding him, Heechul let out a sob and nodded, tears travelling down his face.
“Stop crying, sissy!” his father bellowed. “Boys don’t cry!” He spun around to face his wife, anger seeping from his very soul. “From now on, he is never to spend any time alone with you.”
“Excuse me?” Mrs. Kim looked at her husband like he had three heads.
“You heard me, lady!”
“But he’s my son, too!”
“Well apparently not since you’re treating him like a damn daughter! I won’t allow my only son to turn into a freak because of you! Not if I can help it!”
Heechul’s parents divorced several months later, and his mother was granted custody. His father was never seen again.
Life was peaceful for a while. Children in elementary school were still at an age where discrimination was still nonexistent, and thus they accepted Heechul as a fellow peer though many were still curious as to why he wore dresses. “I thought that dresses were for girls,” they said. Heechul always replied to these statements with a nod and a simple I am a girl, to which most children would just shrug and accept the answer with no more questions. When Heechul entered middle school, however, things started turning ugly. He heard whispers behind his back, and noticed how people would point and laugh when they thought he wasn’t looking.
“Hey, sissy, I bet you can’t even throw a punch!” the boys jeered.
“Stop trying to be one of us!” the girls snuffed. “It’s disgusting.”
Heechul was strong, and took every insult with a proud lift of his chin. Sometimes he would come up with even wittier replies that made the jeerers speechless.
The physical abuse was far more difficult. He had grown his hair long and beautiful just like his mother’s, and unruly schoolboys would constantly pull on his ponytail so hard he fell backwards. He was also a target on the playgrounds, and was inflicted with one too many bruises for those times when students “accidentally” bumped into him. Probably the worst case was on April Fool’s Day in eight grade when several students grabbed him from behind, holding him immobile, while others lifted his skirt over his head and laughed at the bulge under his pantyhose. They had only planned on going so far, but one ambitious boy decided that it would be even funnier to expose the he-she once and for all. Heechul never forgot the humiliation she suffered from this “innocent prank”. After the school showed no sympathy for the abuse, Heechul transferred, but when news broke out about his questionable gender identity in the other school, he had no choice but to be homeschooled in order to be safe from any further cruelty from his peers.
Heechul entered freshman year of high school with dread. His mother had begun to worry about his increasingly closed-off personality, and after months of arguing, she finally talked him into attending school again. “If it really gets too difficult,” she promised, “We’ll find another way. Just please try this, for me.”
He ended up at the entrance of his homeroom class dressed in a simple red dress and a pair of red flats, and entered the room with her eyes downcast, shoulder-length hair covering most of her face. He chose the back seat, and took out his books, heart beating faster every time another student walked in. Several minutes before class started, a cute blond-haired girl in a white top and skirt sat down at the desk next to Heechul’s and immediately greeted him. “My name is Jungsu,” she introduced, a dimpled smile on her pretty face. “You can call me Leeteuk. Everyone does!”
“N-Nice to meet you, Leeteuk,” Heechul stammered. “I’m Heechul.”
“What a pretty name!” Leeteuk grinned. “I wish my name was as pretty as yours!”
Heechul allowed himself a small smile.
“Hey, can I ask you something?”
The boy tensed and nodded hesitantly.
“Where did you get your dress? It’s so pretty!”
Heechul let out a sigh of relief and from there they dove into an animated conversation about dresses, lip gloss, and suspenders, quickly becoming best friends.
Soon Heechul found himself smothered with admiration. As he was naturally feminine and graceful, he fit right into the circle of girls in his class. He enjoyed teasing the bubbly Leeteuk about her crush on football captain Kangin, going shopping with the ever-so-cute Sungmin, and debating with Kyuhyun a.k.a the brains of the group. As he also had the advantage of being gorgeous and fashionable, he quickly gained respect for his knowledge of clothes and cosmetics. He found himself recommending creams to girls with acne problems, and gave hairspray suggestions to girls with frizzy hair, and he always always got compliments on his stylish outfits. This continued until he was considered one of the most popular girls in the whole school, and Heechul would have been lying if he said that he didn’t enjoy the attention. Gradually his previously shot-down self-confidence mended and his true witty charismatic personality started showing through.
In due time, he started attracting male attention, and found that when boys were not being jerks and assholes they were actually quite nice to have around. His first real crush was Han Geng, the transfer student from China, and he told nobody about this except Leeteuk to whom he swore to secrecy. Han Geng was one of the least popular guys in the whole school because of his evident geek persona-horned-rimmed glasses, argyle vests, old man shoes etc.-but Heechul still fell for him. He loved his accent, how he stumbled over the simplest Korean phrases, and how he spent all of his time studying when he honestly didn’t need to. Leeteuk had always told him that he should just go and talk to him, but Heechul always chickened out in the end, preferring to watch from afar.
Surprisingly, Heechul’s first date in his life was with Choi Siwon, the star quarterback of the football team-which was apparently a huge deal. He had called Leeteuk up and squealed with her over the phone, and then on the big night Leeteuk came over and helped Heechul with her outfit and makeup. The date went really well-a romantic movie and then dinner at some expensive diner (Siwon was too rich to be alive)-and Heechul enjoyed himself immensely, and before long they were going steady though deep down he knew that Siwon would never be the one.
In junior year, however, he was outed.
He went to school, dressed as trendily as ever, and was met with whispers and averted eyes. Dread that he had not felt since middle school built up inside of him and before he even reached his homeroom Leeteuk had already dragged her into a stall in the second-floor Girls’ Washroom. “Is it true?” she demanded, arms crossed over her petite chest.
“Is what true?”
“That you are actually a boy?”
“No! Why would you think that?” Heechul answered too quickly, averting his eyes.
Leeteuk’s eyes were hard in their gaze. “You are a terrible liar.” She stomped her foot on the ground. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Heechul raised his eyebrows. “It’s not exactly something you tell people freely.”
“You should have been honest with me,” his best friend pouted. “I told you all of my secrets! I even told you that I was so close to being aborted!”
The boy-turned-girl looked down guiltily. He remembered that day very clearly. They had been sitting on Leeteuk’s bed, talking about their parents, and she tearfully retold the tale of when her mother finally revealed that she was the daughter of a serial rapist. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re going to make this up with me,” Leeteuk crossed her arms. “We’re meeting at my house tomorrow so that you can explain everything. Also, I have a date with Kangin on Saturday and I want to borrow your white flats. Don’t you dare say no.”
Heechul saw amusement in his best friend’s eyes and he laughed. “Deal.”
The rest of Heechul’s closer friends had pretty much the same reaction. “You were always filled with surprises,” Kyuhyun had remarked, rolling her eyes behind her messy bangs. “This counts as one of the bigger ones.” Smartass.
If Siwon was horrified at the revelation, he certainly did not show it. They did break up, evidently, but not because of the gender disparity (not like Heechul believed him). “It’s just that I want children of my own when I grow older,” the quarterback explained kindly. “You won’t be able to give me that.” Heechul hardly cared.
The feedback from the rest of the high school was not as supportive. Some of the girls that Heechul had given beauty tips were suddenly convinced that he was a rapist who was dressing as a girl to infiltrate the Girls’ Bathroom. Many of the boys were suddenly disgusted with the fact that all this time, they had been ogling a b-b-boy. Heechul’s popularity decreased drastically, and he was constantly picked on, but this time, instead of having to bear the brunt of his middle school memories once again, Leeteuk stayed by his side. “I refuse to talk to people who are not open enough to accept you as you are,” she scoffed. “That just means that they wouldn’t be able to accept me either.”
So life went on as before. Those who still talked to him treated him like before. Those who refused to talk to the sick-minded sissy left him alone. And Heechul was happy with the arrangement-that is, until prom season came along.
At first, Heechul was reluctant to go. One, no boy would ask her to prom, and it was embarrassing enough to know that even Kyuhyun of all people had a date (she had almost smiled when longtime crush Zhou Mi asked). Two, he did not want to hold his friends back from dancing with their dates. And three, Siwon had asked Sungmin to the prom, which did not hurt as much as it should have but still. But of course, Heechul never said no to a shopping trip, and agreed to go prom dress shopping with Leeteuk together with their mothers. After trying on at least three hundred dresses, Leeteuk had finally decided on a simple white bareback full-length dress to go with her immaculate white high heels. Heechul, on the other hand, chose a 3-hoop 2-layered red dress with a diamond-decorated corset bodice.
On the evening of the biggest night of his life so far, he sat in front of his mirror and really looked at himself. The closer he looked, the more he liked. He did not see a young man dressed in women’s clothing-he saw a girl-turned-woman, an independent individual who had nothing to be ashamed of. He was not Kim Heechul, the cross-dressing tranny. She was Kim Heechul, known for her wit and fashion sense. And tonight, she was going to be the princess that she had always wanted to be.
Her mother drove her to the school and kissed her good luck. Slipping on her glass high heels, Heechul took a deep breath and strutted down the pavement, pretending that she was a supermodel in her mother’s favorite fashion show. She held her head high as she strove into the hall, and ignored the stares and the looks of disgust and the hey look, it’s the tranny comments. She spotted Leeteuk and the others at a table and put on her prettiest lip-gloss-coated smile. “Hey guys,” she greeted, making sure that she made eye contact with Siwon to let him know that she was okay with everything.
“Heechul, you came!” Leeteuk threw her arms around her best friend. “You look gorgeous!”
“Well, I couldn’t miss the greatest night of my life now, could I?” Heechul winked.
They spent the first hour talking amongst themselves, consisting of Heechul and Kangin getting into a heated argument about whether Superman or Batman was better dressed, before the music started. One by one, the couples started off towards the dance floor, Sungmin and Kyuhyun included. Leeteuk had stayed at the table, loyal as ever, observing the dancing couples longingly.
“Go on,” Heechul nudged her best friend.
“What about you?”
“What about me? It’s your night to shine, girl! Go on! Dammit, Kangin, ask her to dance.”
Leeteuk did not need any more encouragement. She sprung up from her chair and pulled her boyfriend onto the dance floor, smiling her dimpled smile with all she had. Heechul laughed at them and watched, heart swelling with happiness. She noticed the happiness in Leeteuk’s eyes, the curve of her waist articulated every time she spun. Heechul kept watching, and had been so transfixed that she hardly noticed the shadow on her left, only stirring when the shadow cleared his throat. She lifted her head to find a handsome young man in a spiffy black tuxedo and red bowtie.
“May I have this dance?” he asked in a soft accented voice, graciously offering his hand.
She knew that voice. Heechul blinked several times before it hit her: Han Geng. “Y-You may,” she accepted hesitantly.
Han Geng smiled and led her to the dance floor. Without his nerd glasses and sweater, there was no doubt that he outshined even Siwon in terms of looks. Heechul swelled up with pride as the other couples stared at them, gaping.
“You look beautiful,” the Chinese student complimented suavely as they swayed to the slow beat of Elton John’s Can You Feel The Love Tonight? (cheesy but effective, Heechul noted).
“As do you,” Heechul replied, blushing. “But I like you better when you’re not in a tuxedo.”
Han Geng laughed. “Me too. These things are scratchy.”
“Your bowtie is the same color as my dress,” Heechul remarked lamely.
“I knew it would.”
In that moment, Heechul felt as if she had gotten everything she had ever wanted. The other girls were staring at her, mouths open with-oh was that envy? The boys were eyeing her as she glided around the hall in her partner’s lean arms. There she was in the spotlight, the most beautiful girl in the ball, dressed in her dream dress and glass shoes, dancing with her Prince Charming. In that moment, she felt like she was the greatest girl in the whole world. She was finally Cinderella.
Pairing(s): HanChul, side!KangTeuk
Genre(s): Romance, transgender!AU
Length: 3384 words
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Heechul had always wanted to be a princess.
Inspiration(s): I took an English course about transgenderism and I just wanted to write down an idea I got.
```
For as long as he remembered, Kim Heechul had wanted to be Cinderella. He had always wanted that huge layered dress and the fancy pumpkin-turned-carriage and those dainty glass shoes and have Prince Charming approach to ask for a dance. He had always wanted to be the one in the spotlight, the most beautiful girl at the ball, the one who other girls envied, the one that all the men in the room had their eyes on. He wanted all that and more. He wanted to be the greatest girl in the whole world.
But that was the problem. He wasn’t a girl. Not biologically, at least. God had made a mistake when Heechul was placed in the body of a normal male infant in the wee hours of July 10th, 1983. He was never going to forgive God for that blunder-seriously, how hard could putting a person’s soul into the right body be? Why him? Why did he have to be the one to be uncomfortable in his own skin?
Heechul knew something was off with him by the time he turned seven. His mother was a fashionista, always up to date with the newest trends and never seen in the same outfit twice. She never failed to charm the pants off of all who came her way (oftentimes bringing about a fit of jealous possessiveness from her husband, but that’s beside the point), she was elegant to the point where her feet never seemed to touch the ground, and she almost always had the most beautiful smile on her pretty face. Heechul thought she was the epitome of perfection. He sometimes snuck into his mother’s closet and tried on her beautiful dresses, accessorizing with large sunglasses and sometimes a chic wide-brimmed hat, topping off with a pair of classy high-heeled shoes. Little Heechul would spend hours in front of the mirror, admiring his outfit and posing like the models did in those fashion shows his mother watched all the time.
Heechul’s mother was surprised but supportive of her son’s peculiar behavior when she found out about what he did in his spare time. At first she ignored the notion, but as a mother and a self-proclaimed fashion expert, she could not stand the fact that her son had an interest in beauty that had potential to develop into something spectacular. Little by little, she immersed herself in her child’s development, and eventually the two had created a routine where Heechul’s mother would meet with her beloved child in her room once she got back home from work and they would play dress-up for hours on end. She would teach Heechul beauty tips and secrets that only you know, so let’s keep it between us, okay?, and help him color-coordinate his clothing until the best outfit was reached. “Remember, you should always think about your clothing as if you were going to wear that outfit for the rest of your life,” she recited wisely, grinning when her son watched her with wide admiring eyes. “If you can’t see yourself wearing an outfit for more than a week, it’s not going to cut it. Outfits should not only be mere clothing; they are pieces of art.”
The best days were when Heechul’s mother would come home and surprise him with gifts, like that one Wednesday when she brought home a pair of tight jeans that would go perfectly with that red shirt you have, come on, let’s try it on!. At first she was reluctant to buy any dresses or skirts, but when little Heechul continued to insist upon more feminine pretty clothing, she commenced bringing home frilly skirts, cute waist-hugging tops, and delicate flats. She never regretted that decision, especially when she remembered the first time she returned home with a Girl’s Size 7 red summer dress and saw Heechul’s face light up the room as he anxiously tried it on.
“Do I look like a princess, mommy?” he had asked, twirling in front of the full-length mirror. “Do I, do I?”
“You look even more beautiful than any princess,” she had replied, unformed tears in her eyes.
Heechul’s father was another story. A man’s man through and through, he had looked forward to teaching his son how to play baseball and how to fix cars. He had already been disappointed with the fact that Heechul couldn’t throw a ball father than arm’s length not to mention the fact that he refused to get his hands dirty with car oil. When he found out about Heechul’s “unnatural tendencies” and his wife’s contributions, he had lashed out at both of them and refused to believe that his only son was going to turn into a full-fledged sissy.
“It’s not natural,” he had argued, face flushed with anger as he saw Heechul cowering in the corner clad in a flowery pink dress. “None of what you two are doing is natural.”
Mrs. Kim pursed her lips and put her hands on her hips. “Natural or not, Heechul wanted this. It was his own choice, and you really should be more supportive as his father.”
“How could it be his own choice? You’re the one who was so desperate to have a little daughter to play dress-up with! I’m sorry, but for your information, you have a son! Do you understand what a son is? A son is a child who has a dick!”
“Don’t use that language in front of him!”
Mr. Kim ignored his wife and grabbed his son, bringing himself face to face with him. “Now you listen to me, boy,” he growled. “What you are doing here is wrong. All of these clothes, all of these ribbons belong to females, and you are not a female. You are supposed to grow into a strong man and do manly things like football. Do you understand?”
Whimpering from how tight his father was holding him, Heechul let out a sob and nodded, tears travelling down his face.
“Stop crying, sissy!” his father bellowed. “Boys don’t cry!” He spun around to face his wife, anger seeping from his very soul. “From now on, he is never to spend any time alone with you.”
“Excuse me?” Mrs. Kim looked at her husband like he had three heads.
“You heard me, lady!”
“But he’s my son, too!”
“Well apparently not since you’re treating him like a damn daughter! I won’t allow my only son to turn into a freak because of you! Not if I can help it!”
Heechul’s parents divorced several months later, and his mother was granted custody. His father was never seen again.
Life was peaceful for a while. Children in elementary school were still at an age where discrimination was still nonexistent, and thus they accepted Heechul as a fellow peer though many were still curious as to why he wore dresses. “I thought that dresses were for girls,” they said. Heechul always replied to these statements with a nod and a simple I am a girl, to which most children would just shrug and accept the answer with no more questions. When Heechul entered middle school, however, things started turning ugly. He heard whispers behind his back, and noticed how people would point and laugh when they thought he wasn’t looking.
“Hey, sissy, I bet you can’t even throw a punch!” the boys jeered.
“Stop trying to be one of us!” the girls snuffed. “It’s disgusting.”
Heechul was strong, and took every insult with a proud lift of his chin. Sometimes he would come up with even wittier replies that made the jeerers speechless.
The physical abuse was far more difficult. He had grown his hair long and beautiful just like his mother’s, and unruly schoolboys would constantly pull on his ponytail so hard he fell backwards. He was also a target on the playgrounds, and was inflicted with one too many bruises for those times when students “accidentally” bumped into him. Probably the worst case was on April Fool’s Day in eight grade when several students grabbed him from behind, holding him immobile, while others lifted his skirt over his head and laughed at the bulge under his pantyhose. They had only planned on going so far, but one ambitious boy decided that it would be even funnier to expose the he-she once and for all. Heechul never forgot the humiliation she suffered from this “innocent prank”. After the school showed no sympathy for the abuse, Heechul transferred, but when news broke out about his questionable gender identity in the other school, he had no choice but to be homeschooled in order to be safe from any further cruelty from his peers.
Heechul entered freshman year of high school with dread. His mother had begun to worry about his increasingly closed-off personality, and after months of arguing, she finally talked him into attending school again. “If it really gets too difficult,” she promised, “We’ll find another way. Just please try this, for me.”
He ended up at the entrance of his homeroom class dressed in a simple red dress and a pair of red flats, and entered the room with her eyes downcast, shoulder-length hair covering most of her face. He chose the back seat, and took out his books, heart beating faster every time another student walked in. Several minutes before class started, a cute blond-haired girl in a white top and skirt sat down at the desk next to Heechul’s and immediately greeted him. “My name is Jungsu,” she introduced, a dimpled smile on her pretty face. “You can call me Leeteuk. Everyone does!”
“N-Nice to meet you, Leeteuk,” Heechul stammered. “I’m Heechul.”
“What a pretty name!” Leeteuk grinned. “I wish my name was as pretty as yours!”
Heechul allowed himself a small smile.
“Hey, can I ask you something?”
The boy tensed and nodded hesitantly.
“Where did you get your dress? It’s so pretty!”
Heechul let out a sigh of relief and from there they dove into an animated conversation about dresses, lip gloss, and suspenders, quickly becoming best friends.
Soon Heechul found himself smothered with admiration. As he was naturally feminine and graceful, he fit right into the circle of girls in his class. He enjoyed teasing the bubbly Leeteuk about her crush on football captain Kangin, going shopping with the ever-so-cute Sungmin, and debating with Kyuhyun a.k.a the brains of the group. As he also had the advantage of being gorgeous and fashionable, he quickly gained respect for his knowledge of clothes and cosmetics. He found himself recommending creams to girls with acne problems, and gave hairspray suggestions to girls with frizzy hair, and he always always got compliments on his stylish outfits. This continued until he was considered one of the most popular girls in the whole school, and Heechul would have been lying if he said that he didn’t enjoy the attention. Gradually his previously shot-down self-confidence mended and his true witty charismatic personality started showing through.
In due time, he started attracting male attention, and found that when boys were not being jerks and assholes they were actually quite nice to have around. His first real crush was Han Geng, the transfer student from China, and he told nobody about this except Leeteuk to whom he swore to secrecy. Han Geng was one of the least popular guys in the whole school because of his evident geek persona-horned-rimmed glasses, argyle vests, old man shoes etc.-but Heechul still fell for him. He loved his accent, how he stumbled over the simplest Korean phrases, and how he spent all of his time studying when he honestly didn’t need to. Leeteuk had always told him that he should just go and talk to him, but Heechul always chickened out in the end, preferring to watch from afar.
Surprisingly, Heechul’s first date in his life was with Choi Siwon, the star quarterback of the football team-which was apparently a huge deal. He had called Leeteuk up and squealed with her over the phone, and then on the big night Leeteuk came over and helped Heechul with her outfit and makeup. The date went really well-a romantic movie and then dinner at some expensive diner (Siwon was too rich to be alive)-and Heechul enjoyed himself immensely, and before long they were going steady though deep down he knew that Siwon would never be the one.
In junior year, however, he was outed.
He went to school, dressed as trendily as ever, and was met with whispers and averted eyes. Dread that he had not felt since middle school built up inside of him and before he even reached his homeroom Leeteuk had already dragged her into a stall in the second-floor Girls’ Washroom. “Is it true?” she demanded, arms crossed over her petite chest.
“Is what true?”
“That you are actually a boy?”
“No! Why would you think that?” Heechul answered too quickly, averting his eyes.
Leeteuk’s eyes were hard in their gaze. “You are a terrible liar.” She stomped her foot on the ground. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Heechul raised his eyebrows. “It’s not exactly something you tell people freely.”
“You should have been honest with me,” his best friend pouted. “I told you all of my secrets! I even told you that I was so close to being aborted!”
The boy-turned-girl looked down guiltily. He remembered that day very clearly. They had been sitting on Leeteuk’s bed, talking about their parents, and she tearfully retold the tale of when her mother finally revealed that she was the daughter of a serial rapist. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re going to make this up with me,” Leeteuk crossed her arms. “We’re meeting at my house tomorrow so that you can explain everything. Also, I have a date with Kangin on Saturday and I want to borrow your white flats. Don’t you dare say no.”
Heechul saw amusement in his best friend’s eyes and he laughed. “Deal.”
The rest of Heechul’s closer friends had pretty much the same reaction. “You were always filled with surprises,” Kyuhyun had remarked, rolling her eyes behind her messy bangs. “This counts as one of the bigger ones.” Smartass.
If Siwon was horrified at the revelation, he certainly did not show it. They did break up, evidently, but not because of the gender disparity (not like Heechul believed him). “It’s just that I want children of my own when I grow older,” the quarterback explained kindly. “You won’t be able to give me that.” Heechul hardly cared.
The feedback from the rest of the high school was not as supportive. Some of the girls that Heechul had given beauty tips were suddenly convinced that he was a rapist who was dressing as a girl to infiltrate the Girls’ Bathroom. Many of the boys were suddenly disgusted with the fact that all this time, they had been ogling a b-b-boy. Heechul’s popularity decreased drastically, and he was constantly picked on, but this time, instead of having to bear the brunt of his middle school memories once again, Leeteuk stayed by his side. “I refuse to talk to people who are not open enough to accept you as you are,” she scoffed. “That just means that they wouldn’t be able to accept me either.”
So life went on as before. Those who still talked to him treated him like before. Those who refused to talk to the sick-minded sissy left him alone. And Heechul was happy with the arrangement-that is, until prom season came along.
At first, Heechul was reluctant to go. One, no boy would ask her to prom, and it was embarrassing enough to know that even Kyuhyun of all people had a date (she had almost smiled when longtime crush Zhou Mi asked). Two, he did not want to hold his friends back from dancing with their dates. And three, Siwon had asked Sungmin to the prom, which did not hurt as much as it should have but still. But of course, Heechul never said no to a shopping trip, and agreed to go prom dress shopping with Leeteuk together with their mothers. After trying on at least three hundred dresses, Leeteuk had finally decided on a simple white bareback full-length dress to go with her immaculate white high heels. Heechul, on the other hand, chose a 3-hoop 2-layered red dress with a diamond-decorated corset bodice.
On the evening of the biggest night of his life so far, he sat in front of his mirror and really looked at himself. The closer he looked, the more he liked. He did not see a young man dressed in women’s clothing-he saw a girl-turned-woman, an independent individual who had nothing to be ashamed of. He was not Kim Heechul, the cross-dressing tranny. She was Kim Heechul, known for her wit and fashion sense. And tonight, she was going to be the princess that she had always wanted to be.
Her mother drove her to the school and kissed her good luck. Slipping on her glass high heels, Heechul took a deep breath and strutted down the pavement, pretending that she was a supermodel in her mother’s favorite fashion show. She held her head high as she strove into the hall, and ignored the stares and the looks of disgust and the hey look, it’s the tranny comments. She spotted Leeteuk and the others at a table and put on her prettiest lip-gloss-coated smile. “Hey guys,” she greeted, making sure that she made eye contact with Siwon to let him know that she was okay with everything.
“Heechul, you came!” Leeteuk threw her arms around her best friend. “You look gorgeous!”
“Well, I couldn’t miss the greatest night of my life now, could I?” Heechul winked.
They spent the first hour talking amongst themselves, consisting of Heechul and Kangin getting into a heated argument about whether Superman or Batman was better dressed, before the music started. One by one, the couples started off towards the dance floor, Sungmin and Kyuhyun included. Leeteuk had stayed at the table, loyal as ever, observing the dancing couples longingly.
“Go on,” Heechul nudged her best friend.
“What about you?”
“What about me? It’s your night to shine, girl! Go on! Dammit, Kangin, ask her to dance.”
Leeteuk did not need any more encouragement. She sprung up from her chair and pulled her boyfriend onto the dance floor, smiling her dimpled smile with all she had. Heechul laughed at them and watched, heart swelling with happiness. She noticed the happiness in Leeteuk’s eyes, the curve of her waist articulated every time she spun. Heechul kept watching, and had been so transfixed that she hardly noticed the shadow on her left, only stirring when the shadow cleared his throat. She lifted her head to find a handsome young man in a spiffy black tuxedo and red bowtie.
“May I have this dance?” he asked in a soft accented voice, graciously offering his hand.
She knew that voice. Heechul blinked several times before it hit her: Han Geng. “Y-You may,” she accepted hesitantly.
Han Geng smiled and led her to the dance floor. Without his nerd glasses and sweater, there was no doubt that he outshined even Siwon in terms of looks. Heechul swelled up with pride as the other couples stared at them, gaping.
“You look beautiful,” the Chinese student complimented suavely as they swayed to the slow beat of Elton John’s Can You Feel The Love Tonight? (cheesy but effective, Heechul noted).
“As do you,” Heechul replied, blushing. “But I like you better when you’re not in a tuxedo.”
Han Geng laughed. “Me too. These things are scratchy.”
“Your bowtie is the same color as my dress,” Heechul remarked lamely.
“I knew it would.”
In that moment, Heechul felt as if she had gotten everything she had ever wanted. The other girls were staring at her, mouths open with-oh was that envy? The boys were eyeing her as she glided around the hall in her partner’s lean arms. There she was in the spotlight, the most beautiful girl in the ball, dressed in her dream dress and glass shoes, dancing with her Prince Charming. In that moment, she felt like she was the greatest girl in the whole world. She was finally Cinderella.