Happy birthday, Caitlin!

Christmas trees and pictionary. Wine and good fortune. Late nights and early mornings. Dr. Zhivago and stories. It almost feels like last year this time. Interested or uninterested? This girl is interested. I wonder, though, how it will go. He has an inexhaustible sense of humor. I like how he kisses me. I like how his hair stands straight up when ( Read more... )

The past year was one of death, of many temperments. It looks keen to follow me and my family into the new year. My Uncle Brian and Aunt Cheryl both passed away last Thursday in a fire at their home in Muncie, IN. They were both found inches from the door. My mother is heart broken. Of my other uncles, one is in the Navy and is currently on active ( Read more... )

Every time I see something beautiful I want to call you so that I can tell you how beautiful it is. But you wouldn't answer. So I have stopped calling. And I sit and think to myself how beautiful everything is.

I return home this weekend for my Uncle Jacce's funeral.

My removal from everything is increasing. I live in novels and foreign words. Reconstruct reality.

The plague has struck our household. I suffer from this too.

I am lonely, in simplest terms. Fore-go your sympathies. I need a warmth that words cannot provide. Finicky? I think not. Human

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The cold air settles within my bones and leaves me longing for a place much colder. Ten degrees cooler, anyway. The apartment seems more inviting with the colorful draperies and feels somehow more like home ( Read more... )

I finished the last episode of Six Feet Under yesterday. I cried for four hours after it was over.

There are many changes I need to make in my life, many things I need to let go of. Many things I have to tear down. And many more that I need to build. "You can't take a picture of this. Its already gone." I need to move on.

"There is no such thing as luck." The last thing I said online. It has been awhile. I like the way the sun slants through the windows of the apartment. Rays of light on empty walls. I wish more people had come to visit me this often. But is seems I'm more of a bitch than I thought I was. I'm not sorry for anything except the stupid decisions I ( Read more... )

On the train on the way home from work tonight I offered a begging homeless man, who was asking for money for food, half a loaf of Cosi bread from work. He walked right past me. He must not have been very hungry ( Read more... )