Fic: Ev'ry Time We Say Goodbye (Avengers/Glee, Clint/Kurt)
Title: Ev'ry Time We Say Goodbye
Fandom: Avengers (movieverse)/Glee
Pairing: Coulson/Clint/Natasha (past), Natasha/Pepper (established), Tina/Mike(established), Steve/Tony (eventual), Clint/Kurt (eventual), Thor/Jane (established), Bruce/Darcy (established), Kurt/Blaine(past)
Rating: M
Summary: Kurt begins to use the powers he inherited from his mother and through this he often finds himself at odd with the Avengers.
Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with Avengers or Glee. Neither is my toy box and I'm merely playing. The title is a Cole Porter song, I own nothing to do with that either. You can find a version of the song here.
Warning: Spoilers for the movie. Canon compliant. Grief, mind-control. More warnings later.
A/N: A fill for this prompt on the kink meme. Based on the prompt this is supposed to be fun and flirty and it’ll get there, but there is some darkness and issues to be dealt with as well.
A/N2: I'm messing with timelines on this one as S3 of Glee isn't over and the movie just came out. I'm aging Kurt up to about 23. Age differences will be addressed later in the story.
Ev'ry Time We Say Goodbye:
Clint brought his knees up to his chest and let his toes dig gently into the cool faux leather of the chair. Their chair. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back and tried to capture the feeling that it wasn’t all over. They were still a them. They hadn’t been broken. He wasn’t missing a vital piece of what made his life work, what made them work, who made his life work.
If he was still enough maybe he could hold onto the memories just a moment longer. If he shifted through them long enough maybe they’d feel less like memories and he’d get to relive them just one more time. He’d feel himself in this chair wrapped around Phil. He’d still feel fingers running lightly over his scalp and hear words that soothed. He’d still be secure in the knowledge that Natasha was at the table, cleaning her knifes and listening because the words were meant for her too. Or he’d be wrapped around Natasha instead, his fingers running through her hair, his legs thrown over hers as Phil watered plants. Or he’d be cocooned in both their arms, safe, in their chair…
Natasha shifted in the doorway, scattered the memories so that he was once again stuck in the present, the ache of here and now.
“Nat,” he complained.
“It’s been three months,” she reminded him.
“There months today,” he corrected as he shifted his gaze to where she stood in what used to be their bedroom. It’s his bedroom now, but the bed is too big and he’s taken to sleeping in the chair.
“Clint.”
He shrugged, “He’d understand why you and I couldn’t stay together.”
“We never worked, just the two of us,” Natasha agreed.
“No,” he nodded, “we never could figure that out. And you have Pepper now.”
She nodded, unable to stop the small smile that graced her face.
He frowned at her, “Stark didn’t have to let her go.”
“I’m grateful.”
Clint smirked, “He doesn’t know that.”
“They’re still good friends,” Natasha attempted to mollify, “and I make her happy and he’s distracted by the unnecessary tension between him and Steve.”
“Unnecessary?” Clint questioned, “I thought that was part of the fun?”
“Not communicating? Misunderstanding? Making each other miserable?” Natasha tallied, “Those two need to figure it out before someone loses their patience and gives them a push.”
“Wasn’t that what Thor tried to do last week?” Clint teased.
Natasha shrugged.
“So you’re going to…”
“Bruce, maybe,” she teased, “He’d crack before I do and he spends more time with Tony.”
“Tony?” Clint questioned, “I guess living together has brought the group together.”
“You should be there too,” she pushed.
Clint pressed his lips together, swallowed the retort and frowned. They always ended on this and then argued and then she left to spend time with the team and he was left with the empty apartment, until they needed him or he saw them at SHEILD.
“Clint.”
She was right. It’d been three months and he was a part of the team. He should be living with them, but some days it felt easier to hide himself in memories then deal with the full weight of what he’d done, what he’d lost.
“Phil…” Natasha started.
“Don’t,” Clint cut her off, “don’t go and tell me this isn’t what he’d want. I know that. I’m…”
He gave himself a slow breath.
“I’m just tired of losing,” he managed to finish.
“Which is why…” Natasha started and paused, let him finish.
“We keep fighting,” he agreed. He leaned his head back against the chair, caused it to rock slightly as he glanced away from her towards the window. He took a slow breath in and out, concentrating on the sound of it. He took one more moment and then stood, crossed the room and wrapped himself around her. Her arms pulled him in. He rested his chin on her shoulder before he turned his head into the crook of her neck. He thought about allowing himself one more slow breath, but then he’d give himself time to rethink.
“Alright,” he agreed, “but you have to help me pack and I’m keeping the chair.”
“I want some of the plants,” she said in return, “We’ll do this, just the two of us and we’ll get you moved into the tower.”
“I still object to Stark labeling it Avengers,” Clint complained, “He turned it into a target.”
He glanced up when she didn’t respond, took in the look that said the argument was old and huffed out a short almost laugh and he took a step back, determined to relearned how to stand on his own.
“There are boxes in my car, we’ll take our time,” she promised.
Clint crossed his arms and nodded. They could do this. They could say goodbye, together.
~~~~~*****~~~~~
Kurt closed his eyes, felt the roughness of the building through his clothes as he slide to the ground. He drew in a ragged breath and tried not to sob. He wrapped his arms tightly around his knees and shook. He closed his eyes, tempted to reach out as he always did in times of need.
“Don’t,” he whispered to himself.
He’d checked in with Loki only once since Loki had tried to take over Earth and got sent home to Asgard, just once. He’d check in to make sure Loki was still alive and then retreated in to the safety of his own mind. He’d seen what Loki had done. He shouldn’t…but what option did he have left?
“If you already know what I’m going to say then why do you want my advice?” Loki asked.
Kurt shuddered, wanted to retreat, even though he knew they were technically in his head. He forced himself to take Loki in and managed, “You still don’t feel right.”
“You keep saying, but I’m still myself,” Loki told him, “Perhaps you’re the one who’s changed?”
“Mom, please.”
Loki frowned, stepped closer, sat near him and considered. Kurt leaned in, laid his head on his shoulder.
“Destroy them,” Loki advised.
Kurt shook his head.
“You have the power…” he trailed off. Kurt lifted his head till they were looking at each other. Loki frowned, “Child?”
“He made them disappear. He…he, Dad, Carole, Finn…all those people in that restaurant…just gone. He said I felt different and he wanted to see what I could do and…I….”
Loki wiped the tears off his face and pulled him close. Kurt leaned into the embrace.
“Mom,” Kurt sobbed, “I tried. I gave in.”
“Good, make him bring them back. Make him realize he should fear you.”
Kurt shook his head, “The Avengers showed up…they, they tried to save him.”
Loki tilted his head back and Kurt went with the movement willingly, stared up at the now very male face of his mother, who still felt different than he had most of his life, but who was the only one who could offer him advice and comfort.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” Kurt told him.
“I going to tell you where SHIELD is and then you’re going to get everyone back.”
Fandom: Avengers (movieverse)/Glee
Pairing: Coulson/Clint/Natasha (past), Natasha/Pepper (established), Tina/Mike(established), Steve/Tony (eventual), Clint/Kurt (eventual), Thor/Jane (established), Bruce/Darcy (established), Kurt/Blaine(past)
Rating: M
Summary: Kurt begins to use the powers he inherited from his mother and through this he often finds himself at odd with the Avengers.
Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with Avengers or Glee. Neither is my toy box and I'm merely playing. The title is a Cole Porter song, I own nothing to do with that either. You can find a version of the song here.
Warning: Spoilers for the movie. Canon compliant. Grief, mind-control. More warnings later.
A/N: A fill for this prompt on the kink meme. Based on the prompt this is supposed to be fun and flirty and it’ll get there, but there is some darkness and issues to be dealt with as well.
A/N2: I'm messing with timelines on this one as S3 of Glee isn't over and the movie just came out. I'm aging Kurt up to about 23. Age differences will be addressed later in the story.
Ev'ry Time We Say Goodbye:
Clint brought his knees up to his chest and let his toes dig gently into the cool faux leather of the chair. Their chair. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back and tried to capture the feeling that it wasn’t all over. They were still a them. They hadn’t been broken. He wasn’t missing a vital piece of what made his life work, what made them work, who made his life work.
If he was still enough maybe he could hold onto the memories just a moment longer. If he shifted through them long enough maybe they’d feel less like memories and he’d get to relive them just one more time. He’d feel himself in this chair wrapped around Phil. He’d still feel fingers running lightly over his scalp and hear words that soothed. He’d still be secure in the knowledge that Natasha was at the table, cleaning her knifes and listening because the words were meant for her too. Or he’d be wrapped around Natasha instead, his fingers running through her hair, his legs thrown over hers as Phil watered plants. Or he’d be cocooned in both their arms, safe, in their chair…
Natasha shifted in the doorway, scattered the memories so that he was once again stuck in the present, the ache of here and now.
“Nat,” he complained.
“It’s been three months,” she reminded him.
“There months today,” he corrected as he shifted his gaze to where she stood in what used to be their bedroom. It’s his bedroom now, but the bed is too big and he’s taken to sleeping in the chair.
“Clint.”
He shrugged, “He’d understand why you and I couldn’t stay together.”
“We never worked, just the two of us,” Natasha agreed.
“No,” he nodded, “we never could figure that out. And you have Pepper now.”
She nodded, unable to stop the small smile that graced her face.
He frowned at her, “Stark didn’t have to let her go.”
“I’m grateful.”
Clint smirked, “He doesn’t know that.”
“They’re still good friends,” Natasha attempted to mollify, “and I make her happy and he’s distracted by the unnecessary tension between him and Steve.”
“Unnecessary?” Clint questioned, “I thought that was part of the fun?”
“Not communicating? Misunderstanding? Making each other miserable?” Natasha tallied, “Those two need to figure it out before someone loses their patience and gives them a push.”
“Wasn’t that what Thor tried to do last week?” Clint teased.
Natasha shrugged.
“So you’re going to…”
“Bruce, maybe,” she teased, “He’d crack before I do and he spends more time with Tony.”
“Tony?” Clint questioned, “I guess living together has brought the group together.”
“You should be there too,” she pushed.
Clint pressed his lips together, swallowed the retort and frowned. They always ended on this and then argued and then she left to spend time with the team and he was left with the empty apartment, until they needed him or he saw them at SHEILD.
“Clint.”
She was right. It’d been three months and he was a part of the team. He should be living with them, but some days it felt easier to hide himself in memories then deal with the full weight of what he’d done, what he’d lost.
“Phil…” Natasha started.
“Don’t,” Clint cut her off, “don’t go and tell me this isn’t what he’d want. I know that. I’m…”
He gave himself a slow breath.
“I’m just tired of losing,” he managed to finish.
“Which is why…” Natasha started and paused, let him finish.
“We keep fighting,” he agreed. He leaned his head back against the chair, caused it to rock slightly as he glanced away from her towards the window. He took a slow breath in and out, concentrating on the sound of it. He took one more moment and then stood, crossed the room and wrapped himself around her. Her arms pulled him in. He rested his chin on her shoulder before he turned his head into the crook of her neck. He thought about allowing himself one more slow breath, but then he’d give himself time to rethink.
“Alright,” he agreed, “but you have to help me pack and I’m keeping the chair.”
“I want some of the plants,” she said in return, “We’ll do this, just the two of us and we’ll get you moved into the tower.”
“I still object to Stark labeling it Avengers,” Clint complained, “He turned it into a target.”
He glanced up when she didn’t respond, took in the look that said the argument was old and huffed out a short almost laugh and he took a step back, determined to relearned how to stand on his own.
“There are boxes in my car, we’ll take our time,” she promised.
Clint crossed his arms and nodded. They could do this. They could say goodbye, together.
~~~~~*****~~~~~
Kurt closed his eyes, felt the roughness of the building through his clothes as he slide to the ground. He drew in a ragged breath and tried not to sob. He wrapped his arms tightly around his knees and shook. He closed his eyes, tempted to reach out as he always did in times of need.
“Don’t,” he whispered to himself.
He’d checked in with Loki only once since Loki had tried to take over Earth and got sent home to Asgard, just once. He’d check in to make sure Loki was still alive and then retreated in to the safety of his own mind. He’d seen what Loki had done. He shouldn’t…but what option did he have left?
“If you already know what I’m going to say then why do you want my advice?” Loki asked.
Kurt shuddered, wanted to retreat, even though he knew they were technically in his head. He forced himself to take Loki in and managed, “You still don’t feel right.”
“You keep saying, but I’m still myself,” Loki told him, “Perhaps you’re the one who’s changed?”
“Mom, please.”
Loki frowned, stepped closer, sat near him and considered. Kurt leaned in, laid his head on his shoulder.
“Destroy them,” Loki advised.
Kurt shook his head.
“You have the power…” he trailed off. Kurt lifted his head till they were looking at each other. Loki frowned, “Child?”
“He made them disappear. He…he, Dad, Carole, Finn…all those people in that restaurant…just gone. He said I felt different and he wanted to see what I could do and…I….”
Loki wiped the tears off his face and pulled him close. Kurt leaned into the embrace.
“Mom,” Kurt sobbed, “I tried. I gave in.”
“Good, make him bring them back. Make him realize he should fear you.”
Kurt shook his head, “The Avengers showed up…they, they tried to save him.”
Loki tilted his head back and Kurt went with the movement willingly, stared up at the now very male face of his mother, who still felt different than he had most of his life, but who was the only one who could offer him advice and comfort.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” Kurt told him.
“I going to tell you where SHIELD is and then you’re going to get everyone back.”