I've decided to return to LiveJournal after a previous failed attempt to keep a consistent online journal. I updated my layout and I friends locked my old angsty entries. I lurk around enough communities around here; it's time I actually put my journal to use!

Why does this never get any easier, and why am I always left wanting so much more?

I just realized that I'm not going to see you for at least two years, and I'm not okay with that.

I still search for you in every person I meet.

~

A beautiful and blinding morning ( Read more... )

Where has that old friend gone
Lost in a February song
Tell him it won’t be long
Till he opens his eyes...

Where have I gone in a year? Where is the old me? She’s lost in a dream somewhere in the past, in years that blur and melt together and can no longer be distinguished. I don’t remember who I used to be, and I don’t quite know who I am. I’m in ( Read more... )

I want to make up for lost time. I want to take every moment, latch on to each one, drink them in and savor them for the rest of my life. Every smile, every laugh, every word, every tear, every glance, every embrace, every secret; every painful, memorable, wonderful, terrible, beautiful happening - I won't forget a single thing. That's how sibling ( Read more... )

I've recently been mulling over my own definition of "family." To this adoptee, the meaning of the term is wrapped up in biological connection and heritage, sharing ties with those who physically resemble you, who are genetically the same as you. My personal definition of "family" has always been narrowed by that missing piece of me: the biological ( Read more... )

belong - 1. a. to be proper, appropriate or suitable ( Read more... )

I posted this over at the adoptee support forums at http://forums.adoption.comI'm tired of "getting over things" -- adoption-related and otherwise. I wonder if it's worth it to really work through all of my issues. Wouldn't it be better just to let them lie than to live in this limbo-like state where so many things are only partially resolved and ( Read more... )

It's been a while since I've been on here, so I've decided to resurrect this journal. There are only a few people who have the link to this journal, so I can use it to safely vent out some of my very complicated emotions ( Read more... )