For my next trick...
For anyone who has not heard, here's my big announcement: I successfully defended my dissertation on Thursday, June 4!
In addition to my three committee members, I was also humbled to have several others join the event. My ever-patient husband was there, along with not one, not two, but THREE of my kind and loving colleagues from work. Wow!
And to make sure I fully benefit from the fabulous feedback I was hoping to get, I had my husband audiotape the whole thing. Yay!
(Seriously, all three said they would come, but I fully expected something to get in the way. It was SO COOL that they made time in their busy lives to witness and participate in this!)
A few days before the defense, I met with my chair at his house for about five hours. He took my 75 slide powerpoint and put it on a serious diet, with the result being something like 25 slides, total. He also guided me in emphasizing certain points, and we talked, in great detail, about some of the potentially problematic parts of my arguments.
Then I got to do run-through of my presentation with another professor that was at his house. That was nice, because she was not familiar with my topic and was hearing all with "new ears."
So then, June 4. Everyone was in place, and the metaphorical curtain rose. To my surprise, my chair read a brief academic and professional bio of me, which somehow felt indulgent and mildly embarrassing. (But it was nice.) And then it was go time. I was seriously fighting nausea (which I had been entertaining for about the last week) but I just stayed focused, took my time and moved forward.
I went through my first six slides, which were background/ foundational stuff, and then moved to slide 7, which was the first really important/ controversial slide. And it was GONE. It was on my own notes pages, but it was NOT IN THE PPT on the screen. I paused, trying not to panic, and I wondered if everyone had it on their handouts, too... But after a short hesitation, I decided to just move on, and explain those ideas later on.
I went through the rest of my slides as planned-- no more missing pieces, thank goodness. And then it was time for questions.
First question came from my chair, and it was almost ridiculously simple-- it was something we tend to talk about pretty frequently. Nice!
The next question came from my methodology professor, and it, too, was pretty straightforward.
And then my third committee member got the floor, and it felt a bit like the bottom dropped out of the world. I love and respect her, and vice versa, but her questions were really.... It was as if she were asking me to re-frame the entire dissertation around the work of a particular researcher. Although this might work in a very elegant and powerful way, I seriously don't think this is the time to re-work the whole, entire thing.
She also was very uncomfortable with a term I used throughout the dissertation. Instead of saying "minority students" or "culturally, linguistically, and ability diverse students," I used something novel that to me, seems like a better, more descriptive phrase. I used, "students with historically marginalized identities," and she did NOT like that.
So oddly, a tangential debate arose, during my defense, about that term, and why it is (or is not) better than other, more commonly used terminology. I recognize that it is limited and imperfect in many ways, but nevertheless, I prefer it over the others mentioned above for reasons I detailed during my presentation. Ultimately, two committee members agreed with me.
Soon after this, the committee chair asked everyone to leave, so the three committee members could discuss and decide whether or not I had passed. So we trooped outside, and sat listening to them raise their voices at one another. It was a strange sensation.
After what felt like a long time, the chair came out, and embraced me and said, "Congratulations, Doctora! Come inside!" So we went back into the room, and they explained that I had passed my defense, but need to make some edits to my dissertation document before final submission.
Everyone hugged me, and the profs signed all their paperwork, and then we took a couple photos.
And by that point, I was exhausted, and wanted to sleeeeeeeep.
But hubby insisted we get some lunch, so we did. I got a crazy triple-color margarita, which turned out to be HUGE, and I drank most of it. Delicious! Then I came home and slept for four hours!
So now, I have spent a few days ignoring my dissertation, knowing that I need to go back and make all of the required edits relatively soon. But that's small potatoes, compared to everything else!
I am still pretty numb/ in a state of disbelief. It has not really sunken in yet...
In addition to my three committee members, I was also humbled to have several others join the event. My ever-patient husband was there, along with not one, not two, but THREE of my kind and loving colleagues from work. Wow!
And to make sure I fully benefit from the fabulous feedback I was hoping to get, I had my husband audiotape the whole thing. Yay!
(Seriously, all three said they would come, but I fully expected something to get in the way. It was SO COOL that they made time in their busy lives to witness and participate in this!)
A few days before the defense, I met with my chair at his house for about five hours. He took my 75 slide powerpoint and put it on a serious diet, with the result being something like 25 slides, total. He also guided me in emphasizing certain points, and we talked, in great detail, about some of the potentially problematic parts of my arguments.
Then I got to do run-through of my presentation with another professor that was at his house. That was nice, because she was not familiar with my topic and was hearing all with "new ears."
So then, June 4. Everyone was in place, and the metaphorical curtain rose. To my surprise, my chair read a brief academic and professional bio of me, which somehow felt indulgent and mildly embarrassing. (But it was nice.) And then it was go time. I was seriously fighting nausea (which I had been entertaining for about the last week) but I just stayed focused, took my time and moved forward.
I went through my first six slides, which were background/ foundational stuff, and then moved to slide 7, which was the first really important/ controversial slide. And it was GONE. It was on my own notes pages, but it was NOT IN THE PPT on the screen. I paused, trying not to panic, and I wondered if everyone had it on their handouts, too... But after a short hesitation, I decided to just move on, and explain those ideas later on.
I went through the rest of my slides as planned-- no more missing pieces, thank goodness. And then it was time for questions.
First question came from my chair, and it was almost ridiculously simple-- it was something we tend to talk about pretty frequently. Nice!
The next question came from my methodology professor, and it, too, was pretty straightforward.
And then my third committee member got the floor, and it felt a bit like the bottom dropped out of the world. I love and respect her, and vice versa, but her questions were really.... It was as if she were asking me to re-frame the entire dissertation around the work of a particular researcher. Although this might work in a very elegant and powerful way, I seriously don't think this is the time to re-work the whole, entire thing.
She also was very uncomfortable with a term I used throughout the dissertation. Instead of saying "minority students" or "culturally, linguistically, and ability diverse students," I used something novel that to me, seems like a better, more descriptive phrase. I used, "students with historically marginalized identities," and she did NOT like that.
So oddly, a tangential debate arose, during my defense, about that term, and why it is (or is not) better than other, more commonly used terminology. I recognize that it is limited and imperfect in many ways, but nevertheless, I prefer it over the others mentioned above for reasons I detailed during my presentation. Ultimately, two committee members agreed with me.
Soon after this, the committee chair asked everyone to leave, so the three committee members could discuss and decide whether or not I had passed. So we trooped outside, and sat listening to them raise their voices at one another. It was a strange sensation.
After what felt like a long time, the chair came out, and embraced me and said, "Congratulations, Doctora! Come inside!" So we went back into the room, and they explained that I had passed my defense, but need to make some edits to my dissertation document before final submission.
Everyone hugged me, and the profs signed all their paperwork, and then we took a couple photos.
And by that point, I was exhausted, and wanted to sleeeeeeeep.
But hubby insisted we get some lunch, so we did. I got a crazy triple-color margarita, which turned out to be HUGE, and I drank most of it. Delicious! Then I came home and slept for four hours!
So now, I have spent a few days ignoring my dissertation, knowing that I need to go back and make all of the required edits relatively soon. But that's small potatoes, compared to everything else!
I am still pretty numb/ in a state of disbelief. It has not really sunken in yet...