[Mini-series] Let Me Love You, Master
Let me Love You, Master | KyuMin, EunHae | Romance, historical, angst, fluff, smut | PG-13/NC-17
All he see was Sungmin. He never thought he was loved.
*
He was ten when he knew about it. How his body won’t bleed if he was cut. How his bones won’t break whenever he falls from places or beaten. How his face won’t age once he reached puberty. How his friends will leave him one by one and he will be the only one left after that. How his family moved from one place to another to make sure their secrets of undead are well kept, and spread around the world, the tribes of his kind.
Since then, he never appreciates his own life. He mocked every human who wanted to have immortality just like him. They who want to have his family’s blood to be just like them.
“I want to be human,” he said once to his best friend who knew about him, the one that he met after living for two hundred years, “so that I can die, when my age says I should. So that I will only know the people that I befriend with, not their great great grandchildren too.”
The friend laughed, and hugged him. “Don’t worry, if I’m dead before I can marry, you’ll only know me, for I don’t have anyone else in my family, Hyukjae.”
And the friend was right. Two days after saying that, he was killed when his house was robbed.
And Hyukjae lost his best friend again. Maybe this time, this best friend is one of his bestest best friend. So he decided to erase this best friend’s name and face out of his head.
‘I don’t want to know if I’m going to meet the next him in the future,’ or so he thought.
-
It was only five years later after the loss of his best friend, that he met with a man of his kind, named Sungmin, when his family hosted a reunion of their tribe, that will be held once in five years for their age, or five hundred years for human’s age.
The man was small, with a short hairstyle, and a delicate smile. “Hi. You must be Hyukjae, right? How old are you? I didn’t see you in the last reunion.”
Not even interested in the reunion itself, Hyukjae lazily answered the question. “Sorry, I was only born around two hundred and five years ago. So it is impossible for me to be there in the first place.” Sungmin smiled, and laughed. Should be said as giggle. And it was that kind of giggle that made Hyukjae interested to make the chat longer. And soon enough, they became friends.
-
Friends, is the word that he used, to make sure that Sungmin didn’t run away from him. He had fallen in love with Sungmin. Sungmin was the only reason for him to live. But he was not the reason for Sungmin to move on with life.
Sungmin is an optimist. He never regrets having to live for hundreds of years. He enjoyed living while studying about the world, and even creating histories. Sungmin was the one who told him, study about your own existence, if you don’t want to be bored with it.
And so he did. He did all the research of his tribe’s history, their difference between normal human, their specialities, taboos, myths. And after hundreds of years, Hyukjae himself was stunned by how much that he had contributed to his tribe.
The tribe that was named as VAMPIRE, by humans.
And in the time of doing all the research, he was finding his strength to tell Sungmin how much he adored him, admired him, love him. But then, he was too late.
-
He hated it. The smile on Sungmin’s face when he was talking about the boy named Kyuhyun. The boy that was special to him. But he can do nothing about it. Because he loved the same smile too. The smile that was full of love.
So all that he could do was listening to the talk, smile when he thought he needs to, patted Sungmin’s back when he was worried about the boy, and did absolutely nothing about his own feelings. And desire.
The desire to have Sungmin in his arms. The desire to kiss him. The desire to say “Stop talking about that damn boy!” or “Stay with me only!” to Sungmin.
All because he was too scared to lose Sungmin in his life. Too scared to have Sungmin to hate him.
All because the one reason left, because he love Sungmin.
“Hyung, I would like to meet him someday.”
-
He received a letter a few months later, by Sungmin, saying that he needed him there. At Kyuhyun’s house.
“He’s dying. I’m losing him.”
Even though it was not an appropriate feeling for him to have at that time, Hyukjae knew that he didn’t want to stop feeling so delightful about
it. Thinking about there will be no one to take Sungmin away from him anymore.
The journey was long, as it was a road from West to East, and cold, as it was the starting of winter in Korea. The horses of his carriage starting to lose their strength, due to the coldness and starvation. “We can’t use these horses anymore, Master,” said his human servant, who will follow him wherever he goes; “they are dying.”
Hyukjae got off his carriage, his thick, long coat followed his movement. “Then let’s kill them, eat their meat, and continue our journey on foot.”
He went back inside his carriage, searching for his emergency dagger, and hand it to his servant, who took it with trembling hands.
“I... I ca - can’t do this, Master. This is... cruel.”
Hyukjae smirked, as he took the dagger from the servant’s young hand, and slowly walked towards the dying horses, which were lying down on the cold road by its side, panting and making weird sounds, the sounds of some life forms that is about to die.
“It’s not like it will be better for us to leave them out in the cold, dying just like that, Donghae.”
And Donghae turned his head the other way around, as the sounds of the Master’s dagger ripped the flesh of the mammals flew straight into his ears.
-
‘The Master is so cruel,’ he thought, but there’s nothing that Donghae could do. Because at the other side of his thought, there was another word;
‘The Master is so cool.’
It was five years ago, when he was abducted and being shipped to a place called the West region. A place where they spoke different language, and different culture from his birthplace. Where the people were huge, and way taller than him.
He was cold, and starving. His body was aching as a result of falling while he was running away from the people who smuggled him. He didn’t know how to speak, how to beg for food, how to ask for a shelter, and people were wondering who the hell is this weird looking teenage boy?
He was shoved away like garbage. Until one day, two men came up to him, smiling like something was hidden behind the smile, and waving a buck of paper, which he believed it was money, tempting him.
“Give us your ass, and you’ll live.” But of course he couldn’t understand that. All he knew that he was nodding, and a few seconds later, he was forced to undressed in the cold, damp street. Nobody heard his calling for help.
His hands were tied at the back; his face was on the wet road. Rough fingers were clenching his butt cheeks, and one of them has already poking his asshole. Donghae’s eyes were filled with aching tears.
“Please let me go...” but of course, they couldn’t understand that. And donghae doubt the fact that even if they did understand, they’ll stop. One of the men pushed his huge dick into Donghae’s ass, almost tearing the opening up, and that made him screamed so loud, so painful. His wet, black hair was fisted at the back of his head, being pulled forcefully, that he could hear some strains of his hair were pulled out of its place, as the man thrust in his member deeper into his body.
“Shit man, he’s bleeding.” But Donghae couldn’t understand that, too. All he knew was it was the next man turn to fuck him up. He could feel his body moved together with the force thrust. It was so harsh, that he couldn’t even hear himself panting for air in the moment. His nipples were swollen due to the bitings, and pinching, and his lips were covered with cuts, being beaten when he refused to spread his legs to be fucked earlier.
All he could ask for at that time, was an angel to be sent to him. God listened to him, but it was not an angel in white who saved him.
The angel was in black. And eyes with the colour of ruby.
-
He opened his eyes, and found that he was laying on a huge bed, wearing a cloth that he never seen before in his life. But his down parts felt as if he was naked. And small touches on his swollen slit.
Donghae jolted, and tried to sit up, only to be pushed down back by a pale, slim man in front of him. “Don’t worry, I’m not gonna hurt you.”
He spoke in Donghae’s mother tongue, that made him a little bit comforted. But still, even the man was actually treating his wound, DOnghae couldn’t help but to be embarrassed by the fact that the man was actually seeing his private parts.
“You can call me Master.”
“Ma - Master?”
“Yeah, Master. I’m hiring you to be my servant. Are you okay with it?”
Donghae nodded. This is not good. He was excited. And it’s not good when you’re too excited, because your...
“Hey, kiddo. You’re hard.” Abruptly, Donghae sat up and covered his hardness, apologizing to the Master. Hyukjae snickered. “It’s okay. You’re a man after all.” Laughing, the Master ruffled his dark hair and knuckled his head.
Embarrassed, Donghae nodded while he palmed his face down. But through the view behind his fingers, he could see that the Master was laughing so hard that his cheeks were red and his gummy smile was so... mesmerizing.
Those made him feel as if he was captured by the mystery man in front of him.
-
“Are you okay, Donghae?” the servant nodded, as he carried two bags of horse meats behind his back without any sound. Hyukjae was a bit worried since it’s getting dark and the journey still need them to walk a few miles away to reach the town where Sungmin live. And it was colder too, that despite Donghae was telling him that he was okay, he could see that the young man was actually trembling of the coldness of the night.
Slowly, the slim man took off his long jacket and shoved it to Donghae, and took one of the meat bags from the servant’s shoulder.
“Master?”
“Just walk. Don’t talk too much, or you’ll get tired easily in this weather.” Donghae nodded, and did as he told to. He was smiling up to his ears as he sniffed the scent of the jacket. The scent of his Master.
“Master, may I ask you a question?”
“You really didn’t understand my orders earlier, did you?” Donghae smiled stupidly, stupidly enough that Hyukjae didn’t think that he could resist it at all.
“Yes, you may.”
Twisting the rope that was used to tie the end of the meat bag on his shoulder, Donghae cleared his throat several times, before he finally said the awaited question;
“You did know about the rumours they were talking about you, back in England, didn’t you?”
Hyukjae turned and stared at the servant’s face, which wasn’t really looking at his Master while he was talking.
“Define rumours.”
Donghae lifted his head, and jilted a little bit as he saw the stares by Hyukjae at him. “Urmm... the one that said that... you’re not a human.”
And with that, Hyukjae let out a huge laugh, that nearly took Donghae’s soul out of his body.
“Donghae-ah, that’s not a rumour. That’s the truth.”
“Eh??”
-
“B - b - b - b - but...!! You didn’t get burnt when it was daylight!!”
“Who said I MUST get burnt in daylight?”
“A - a - a - and you eat cooked meat!!”
“Oh, didn’t I tell you? Even it was cooked on the outside, it was still raw and bloody inside. Yummy.”
“D - d - d - d - did you... kill people... by any chance?”
“Nope. That’s against the law of my tribe.”
The fire in front of them was flickering, and swaying as the cold breeze moving around them. There was a silent moment before Hyukjae opened his mouth.
“Shocked?” Donghae nodded. Hyukjae could see that the distance between them was still the same as before Donghae asked his all the questions, the moment when he confessed that he was not a human to his servant.
“Scared?” Hyukjae was expecting a nod too, this time. But it was not. Donghae hastily shook his head, while shutting his eyes, as hard as he could, as if he was trying to convince his Master, that he was not scared of him at all. “If... if I’m scared, then I must have left you at the moment I... I knew that you’re not a human, Master.”
Hyukjae smiled, as happily as he always have, and dusted the cloth that he spread next to him, as a sign for Donghae to sit nearer to him.
“I don’t want to let my loyal servant freeze to death.” And Donghae neared his Master, as usual, obeying what he was told to do. And as their shoulders met, unexpectedly, Donghae wrapped his teenage arms around the Master’s neck, tightly enough, that made Hyukjae wondered what has gotten into this kid.
“Let - Let me stay like this for a while, Master. To... to stay warm.”
-
The sleeping face of the young man really made him smile. Hyukjae ran his finger down the bridge of the young man’s nose, to his cheeks, then his lips. His lips were thin, and dry. Maybe because of the coldness, maybe because lack of water. Or maybe simply because it was originally dry. Hyukjae didn’t want to waste his time thinking about that.
Lee Donghae. The first time he heard the boy’s name, he felt as if there was something about this name. About this boy. As if they have met somewhere else before. Before he took this boy in as his personal servant, even though he was returning to a house that was filled with maids and butlers, he still felt lonely. He got nobody to talk to, nobody to be teased. The mansion was just a place for him to sleep and eat, and nothing else.
He could never love the mansion, or so he thought.
But when the teenage boy came, it was different. He was clumsy, never really understood the orders that he gave, and often makes mistakes, that sometimes Hyukjae felt as if he was more a tutor for the kid than of a Master. In the first place it was tiring, his jobs and managing the lost Korean boy, but then he enjoyed it more than anyone else. Donghae gave him the feel of being a normal human. To be tired of something or someone is amazing. To really think of someone’s life while he was working, or to think of home when he was away, just because Donghae was there, was a good feeling.
When he asked Donghae whether he wants to return to his birthplace, the servant shook his head. “I don’t think, I can go back to my place before I can repay your deeds, Master.”
It was a silly excuse that humans often told him, being a creature that lives inside an immortality cycle of life, but when it was Donghae who told him that, he somehow believed it, one hundred percent. No doubt.
Is this the same feeling that Sungmin felt for the boy named Kyuhyun? He didn’t know, and he never wanted to know. Upset of his own mind for suddenly thinking about that, Hyukjae then snuggled deeper to Donghae’s side, and hugged the servant’s waist comfortably. There were no awkward feelings, just a familiar atmosphere surrounding him. He looked at Donghae’s face a little bit longer, since the moon was full that night, and the light from the fire they lit before made the servant’s face became clearer in the dark.
He thought he was the only one who was staring, when suddenly he realized, the young servant’s eyes were actually opening slightly, looking back into his eyes, giving him a slight of chill down his spine.
“Ouh, you scared me.” Donghae smiled sleepily, and put his cold palm on his Master’s face.
“Master, this Sungmin that we’re going to visit, is he a vampire like you too?” didn’t do anything about the servant’s hand, he closed his eyes and answered;
“Yeah, he is. Why?”
“Nothing. He must be a good vampire like you too.” Hyukjae nodded, and smiled. His face was blushing, Donghae could see that.
“And you love him, right?” he nodded again, but quickly realized that it was a trap. He untangled his arms from the servant’s body, and sat up abruptly. “What are you talking about? I don’t love him!”
The servant sat up too, and lazily moved his butt to be nearer to the Master. “Well, you can say that you love him like a brother. And even if you don’t really love him as a brother, then, just confess you true feelings to him clearly, rather than keeping it inside yourself only.”
Hyukjae never expected this to happen. That his feelings will be revealed by someone that he thought wasn’t smart enough about love and feelings like Donghae.
“I... I... don’t really know about this. Just shut up and go to sleep already.” He lay back onto the thick leather cloth that was used to exclude themselves from the cold floor of the woods, and Donghae followed him a few seconds later with a smile on his face. “You must tell him that you love him, Master.”
“Aish arasso~! Now sleep, brat!”
They both fell asleep, snuggling into each other’s embrace, to avoid the coldness, and Hyukjae never thought that this will be the last night he will see a smile on Donghae’s young face.
-
He woke up the next morning, only to find Donghae’s leather sleeping bag was empty, and the day was snowing like hell. Their campfire has been lit off a long time ago, and coldness would have killed him, if only he was a human.
Picking up his things, he shouted for his servant’s name again and again, and listens to no reply, except for the sounds of his own voice earlier, bouncing back into his ears, echoing through the forest. In his head he thought hard of the possible places that Donghae could’ve been, or anything that happened to the human teenager. Hyukjae was worried, and he never thought that he would ever be this worried for someone like Donghae before.
And when he passed a huge oak tree that was losing its tiny leaves for trying to match with the winter’s need, he spotted a familiar body, leaned against the old tree, with snows covering his clothes, and a pale; no, a blue colour painted on his face for the freezing temperature.
He didn’t remember when did he slide on the wood’s floor and embrace the dying boy, but he could feel the ice-like hands that were touching his tears that flowed from his small eyes. It took him a while to figure out what happened to Donghae, when he saw blood stains on the latter’s coat, that was tore in a place near his ribs.
“Master, I -I managed to save this...from those mobs...”
It was the pocket watch that Sungmin gave him a few years ago when he visited him in France. Sungmin was working as a clocksmith there. The gold watch was his favourite, and he has been holding it as his dearest since he got it.
“Silly. This isn’t worth your life for it, stupid Donghae.” His hands were pulling Donghae’s body much closer to his chest, trying his best to give Donghae the last warmth of his life.
“Master, your heart is beating. Just like a human’s heart does.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“So you’re no different from a human. Your heart is even more beautiful than a human.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“So you don’t have to think of any other ways of being a human, Master, because you’re more human than a human himself.”
“Why are you telling me all these, Donghae? You’re dying for goodness sake!” Donghae then held his hand and smiled. Tears were coming out from both their eyes, and there was no sign for it to stop.
“Because these are all that I’ve wanted to say to you, since the first time we met. I love you, Master.”
And Donghae’s panting breath stopped. Hyukjae’s eyes were widened, if that was even possible. In front of his eyes, a boy that he never thought would become his dearest gone in silence.
Hyukjae bent down, and planted a small kiss on the dead lips. The body that was warm and lively last night, now left cold and inanimate.
“Donghae, I am human, just because you said so.”
-
Hyukjae arrived at Sungmin’s workplace, with a small black ash pot in his hand. He couldn’t hide his tears when he realised that it was Donghae in it all the time. And ironically, when he was there, the whole town was mourning for the loss of the doryeon-nim of a scholar family. And when he saw Sungmin was one of the mourners, he finally figured out that Kyuhyun was dead, too.
“He’s gone, Donghae. Sungmin’s beloved was gone. Just around the time I lost you.”
And in his head, he could see Donghae’s clumsy smile when he smacked the boy’s head after he did something wrong, or the burnt kitchen that was resulted from Donghae’s eagerness to learn how to cook. Donghae’s excited face when he was telling Hyukjae a story, or his sleepy face in the morning when Hyukjae woke him up to accompany him for a business affair.
And he just couldn’t help but wonder why he didn’t fall in love with this kid for all these times they were together.
-
“Hyukjae, this is not right. Our story has ended a long time ago. I don’t love you anymore, Hyukjae.”
“Hyung, haven’t you ever thought, why I helped you all these centuries? Why I let you know all the secrets of the reborn of the souls, why I never been away from you more than a decade?”
“Now I know, how it feels when you love someone who doesn’t love you. So thank you for loving me after all these times, Hyukjae-ah.”
It was the end of 2009, when he confessed his heart to Sungmin once again. A few hundred years before, after they both mourned for their loss, they’ve tried to make this relationship to work, but Sungmin was still waiting for the same man to be loved. Even though Hyukjae was by his side all this time.
He was crying when he was walking back to his shared room with Donghae, when that roommate of his hugged him from the back.
“Eunhyuk-ah, don’t cry.”
“Donghae? Wha - what are you saying? I’m not crying you dumbass.” Trying to smile, he shoved Donghae away, only to be hugged even tighter by the latter. Not feeling energetic to stop the harass, he just stayed like that in Donghae’s arms for a while.
“Don’t cry Eunhyuk-ah.”
“I’m not.”
“At least you’ve confessed to Sungmin hyung. We can never expect everything to happen to our own will. Don’t cry.”
And for some strange reason, he felt incredibly calm inside Donghae’s arms. The warmth that the body projected were wrapping his body, and the familiarity came to him;
As if Donghae was one of his beloved from a long time ago.
“Eunhyuk-ah, can you let me love you?”
“Huh?”
“If you’ve been the only one that loved all this time, then this time, let me be the one that loves you.”
“It takes a lot to love someone like me. Are you ready?” Donghae turned his body around, and gave him a small peck on his forehead.
“From a long time ago.”
And Hyukjae was thinking about having this man as his final love.
Hyukjae finally drank the potion for mortality the next day.
-
“I want to be human,” he said once to his best friend who knew about him, the one that he met after living for two hundred years, “so that I can die, when my age says I should. So that I will only know the people that I befriend with, not their great great grandchildren too.”
The friend laughed, and hugged him. “Don’t worry, if I’m dead before I can marry, you’ll only know me, for I don’t have anyone else in my family, Hyukjae.”
And the friend was right. Two days after saying that, he was killed when his house was robbed.
And Hyukjae lost his best friend again. Maybe this time, this best friend is one of his best best friend. So he decided to erase this best friend’s name and face out of his head.
‘I don’t want to know if I’m going to meet the next Donghae again,’ or so he thought.
‘So that I can fall in love with him in the future, over and over again.'
-The End-
All he see was Sungmin. He never thought he was loved.
*
He was ten when he knew about it. How his body won’t bleed if he was cut. How his bones won’t break whenever he falls from places or beaten. How his face won’t age once he reached puberty. How his friends will leave him one by one and he will be the only one left after that. How his family moved from one place to another to make sure their secrets of undead are well kept, and spread around the world, the tribes of his kind.
Since then, he never appreciates his own life. He mocked every human who wanted to have immortality just like him. They who want to have his family’s blood to be just like them.
“I want to be human,” he said once to his best friend who knew about him, the one that he met after living for two hundred years, “so that I can die, when my age says I should. So that I will only know the people that I befriend with, not their great great grandchildren too.”
The friend laughed, and hugged him. “Don’t worry, if I’m dead before I can marry, you’ll only know me, for I don’t have anyone else in my family, Hyukjae.”
And the friend was right. Two days after saying that, he was killed when his house was robbed.
And Hyukjae lost his best friend again. Maybe this time, this best friend is one of his bestest best friend. So he decided to erase this best friend’s name and face out of his head.
‘I don’t want to know if I’m going to meet the next him in the future,’ or so he thought.
-
It was only five years later after the loss of his best friend, that he met with a man of his kind, named Sungmin, when his family hosted a reunion of their tribe, that will be held once in five years for their age, or five hundred years for human’s age.
The man was small, with a short hairstyle, and a delicate smile. “Hi. You must be Hyukjae, right? How old are you? I didn’t see you in the last reunion.”
Not even interested in the reunion itself, Hyukjae lazily answered the question. “Sorry, I was only born around two hundred and five years ago. So it is impossible for me to be there in the first place.” Sungmin smiled, and laughed. Should be said as giggle. And it was that kind of giggle that made Hyukjae interested to make the chat longer. And soon enough, they became friends.
-
Friends, is the word that he used, to make sure that Sungmin didn’t run away from him. He had fallen in love with Sungmin. Sungmin was the only reason for him to live. But he was not the reason for Sungmin to move on with life.
Sungmin is an optimist. He never regrets having to live for hundreds of years. He enjoyed living while studying about the world, and even creating histories. Sungmin was the one who told him, study about your own existence, if you don’t want to be bored with it.
And so he did. He did all the research of his tribe’s history, their difference between normal human, their specialities, taboos, myths. And after hundreds of years, Hyukjae himself was stunned by how much that he had contributed to his tribe.
The tribe that was named as VAMPIRE, by humans.
And in the time of doing all the research, he was finding his strength to tell Sungmin how much he adored him, admired him, love him. But then, he was too late.
-
He hated it. The smile on Sungmin’s face when he was talking about the boy named Kyuhyun. The boy that was special to him. But he can do nothing about it. Because he loved the same smile too. The smile that was full of love.
So all that he could do was listening to the talk, smile when he thought he needs to, patted Sungmin’s back when he was worried about the boy, and did absolutely nothing about his own feelings. And desire.
The desire to have Sungmin in his arms. The desire to kiss him. The desire to say “Stop talking about that damn boy!” or “Stay with me only!” to Sungmin.
All because he was too scared to lose Sungmin in his life. Too scared to have Sungmin to hate him.
All because the one reason left, because he love Sungmin.
“Hyung, I would like to meet him someday.”
-
He received a letter a few months later, by Sungmin, saying that he needed him there. At Kyuhyun’s house.
“He’s dying. I’m losing him.”
Even though it was not an appropriate feeling for him to have at that time, Hyukjae knew that he didn’t want to stop feeling so delightful about
it. Thinking about there will be no one to take Sungmin away from him anymore.
The journey was long, as it was a road from West to East, and cold, as it was the starting of winter in Korea. The horses of his carriage starting to lose their strength, due to the coldness and starvation. “We can’t use these horses anymore, Master,” said his human servant, who will follow him wherever he goes; “they are dying.”
Hyukjae got off his carriage, his thick, long coat followed his movement. “Then let’s kill them, eat their meat, and continue our journey on foot.”
He went back inside his carriage, searching for his emergency dagger, and hand it to his servant, who took it with trembling hands.
“I... I ca - can’t do this, Master. This is... cruel.”
Hyukjae smirked, as he took the dagger from the servant’s young hand, and slowly walked towards the dying horses, which were lying down on the cold road by its side, panting and making weird sounds, the sounds of some life forms that is about to die.
“It’s not like it will be better for us to leave them out in the cold, dying just like that, Donghae.”
And Donghae turned his head the other way around, as the sounds of the Master’s dagger ripped the flesh of the mammals flew straight into his ears.
-
‘The Master is so cruel,’ he thought, but there’s nothing that Donghae could do. Because at the other side of his thought, there was another word;
‘The Master is so cool.’
It was five years ago, when he was abducted and being shipped to a place called the West region. A place where they spoke different language, and different culture from his birthplace. Where the people were huge, and way taller than him.
He was cold, and starving. His body was aching as a result of falling while he was running away from the people who smuggled him. He didn’t know how to speak, how to beg for food, how to ask for a shelter, and people were wondering who the hell is this weird looking teenage boy?
He was shoved away like garbage. Until one day, two men came up to him, smiling like something was hidden behind the smile, and waving a buck of paper, which he believed it was money, tempting him.
“Give us your ass, and you’ll live.” But of course he couldn’t understand that. All he knew that he was nodding, and a few seconds later, he was forced to undressed in the cold, damp street. Nobody heard his calling for help.
His hands were tied at the back; his face was on the wet road. Rough fingers were clenching his butt cheeks, and one of them has already poking his asshole. Donghae’s eyes were filled with aching tears.
“Please let me go...” but of course, they couldn’t understand that. And donghae doubt the fact that even if they did understand, they’ll stop. One of the men pushed his huge dick into Donghae’s ass, almost tearing the opening up, and that made him screamed so loud, so painful. His wet, black hair was fisted at the back of his head, being pulled forcefully, that he could hear some strains of his hair were pulled out of its place, as the man thrust in his member deeper into his body.
“Shit man, he’s bleeding.” But Donghae couldn’t understand that, too. All he knew was it was the next man turn to fuck him up. He could feel his body moved together with the force thrust. It was so harsh, that he couldn’t even hear himself panting for air in the moment. His nipples were swollen due to the bitings, and pinching, and his lips were covered with cuts, being beaten when he refused to spread his legs to be fucked earlier.
All he could ask for at that time, was an angel to be sent to him. God listened to him, but it was not an angel in white who saved him.
The angel was in black. And eyes with the colour of ruby.
-
He opened his eyes, and found that he was laying on a huge bed, wearing a cloth that he never seen before in his life. But his down parts felt as if he was naked. And small touches on his swollen slit.
Donghae jolted, and tried to sit up, only to be pushed down back by a pale, slim man in front of him. “Don’t worry, I’m not gonna hurt you.”
He spoke in Donghae’s mother tongue, that made him a little bit comforted. But still, even the man was actually treating his wound, DOnghae couldn’t help but to be embarrassed by the fact that the man was actually seeing his private parts.
“You can call me Master.”
“Ma - Master?”
“Yeah, Master. I’m hiring you to be my servant. Are you okay with it?”
Donghae nodded. This is not good. He was excited. And it’s not good when you’re too excited, because your...
“Hey, kiddo. You’re hard.” Abruptly, Donghae sat up and covered his hardness, apologizing to the Master. Hyukjae snickered. “It’s okay. You’re a man after all.” Laughing, the Master ruffled his dark hair and knuckled his head.
Embarrassed, Donghae nodded while he palmed his face down. But through the view behind his fingers, he could see that the Master was laughing so hard that his cheeks were red and his gummy smile was so... mesmerizing.
Those made him feel as if he was captured by the mystery man in front of him.
-
“Are you okay, Donghae?” the servant nodded, as he carried two bags of horse meats behind his back without any sound. Hyukjae was a bit worried since it’s getting dark and the journey still need them to walk a few miles away to reach the town where Sungmin live. And it was colder too, that despite Donghae was telling him that he was okay, he could see that the young man was actually trembling of the coldness of the night.
Slowly, the slim man took off his long jacket and shoved it to Donghae, and took one of the meat bags from the servant’s shoulder.
“Master?”
“Just walk. Don’t talk too much, or you’ll get tired easily in this weather.” Donghae nodded, and did as he told to. He was smiling up to his ears as he sniffed the scent of the jacket. The scent of his Master.
“Master, may I ask you a question?”
“You really didn’t understand my orders earlier, did you?” Donghae smiled stupidly, stupidly enough that Hyukjae didn’t think that he could resist it at all.
“Yes, you may.”
Twisting the rope that was used to tie the end of the meat bag on his shoulder, Donghae cleared his throat several times, before he finally said the awaited question;
“You did know about the rumours they were talking about you, back in England, didn’t you?”
Hyukjae turned and stared at the servant’s face, which wasn’t really looking at his Master while he was talking.
“Define rumours.”
Donghae lifted his head, and jilted a little bit as he saw the stares by Hyukjae at him. “Urmm... the one that said that... you’re not a human.”
And with that, Hyukjae let out a huge laugh, that nearly took Donghae’s soul out of his body.
“Donghae-ah, that’s not a rumour. That’s the truth.”
“Eh??”
-
“B - b - b - b - but...!! You didn’t get burnt when it was daylight!!”
“Who said I MUST get burnt in daylight?”
“A - a - a - and you eat cooked meat!!”
“Oh, didn’t I tell you? Even it was cooked on the outside, it was still raw and bloody inside. Yummy.”
“D - d - d - d - did you... kill people... by any chance?”
“Nope. That’s against the law of my tribe.”
The fire in front of them was flickering, and swaying as the cold breeze moving around them. There was a silent moment before Hyukjae opened his mouth.
“Shocked?” Donghae nodded. Hyukjae could see that the distance between them was still the same as before Donghae asked his all the questions, the moment when he confessed that he was not a human to his servant.
“Scared?” Hyukjae was expecting a nod too, this time. But it was not. Donghae hastily shook his head, while shutting his eyes, as hard as he could, as if he was trying to convince his Master, that he was not scared of him at all. “If... if I’m scared, then I must have left you at the moment I... I knew that you’re not a human, Master.”
Hyukjae smiled, as happily as he always have, and dusted the cloth that he spread next to him, as a sign for Donghae to sit nearer to him.
“I don’t want to let my loyal servant freeze to death.” And Donghae neared his Master, as usual, obeying what he was told to do. And as their shoulders met, unexpectedly, Donghae wrapped his teenage arms around the Master’s neck, tightly enough, that made Hyukjae wondered what has gotten into this kid.
“Let - Let me stay like this for a while, Master. To... to stay warm.”
-
The sleeping face of the young man really made him smile. Hyukjae ran his finger down the bridge of the young man’s nose, to his cheeks, then his lips. His lips were thin, and dry. Maybe because of the coldness, maybe because lack of water. Or maybe simply because it was originally dry. Hyukjae didn’t want to waste his time thinking about that.
Lee Donghae. The first time he heard the boy’s name, he felt as if there was something about this name. About this boy. As if they have met somewhere else before. Before he took this boy in as his personal servant, even though he was returning to a house that was filled with maids and butlers, he still felt lonely. He got nobody to talk to, nobody to be teased. The mansion was just a place for him to sleep and eat, and nothing else.
He could never love the mansion, or so he thought.
But when the teenage boy came, it was different. He was clumsy, never really understood the orders that he gave, and often makes mistakes, that sometimes Hyukjae felt as if he was more a tutor for the kid than of a Master. In the first place it was tiring, his jobs and managing the lost Korean boy, but then he enjoyed it more than anyone else. Donghae gave him the feel of being a normal human. To be tired of something or someone is amazing. To really think of someone’s life while he was working, or to think of home when he was away, just because Donghae was there, was a good feeling.
When he asked Donghae whether he wants to return to his birthplace, the servant shook his head. “I don’t think, I can go back to my place before I can repay your deeds, Master.”
It was a silly excuse that humans often told him, being a creature that lives inside an immortality cycle of life, but when it was Donghae who told him that, he somehow believed it, one hundred percent. No doubt.
Is this the same feeling that Sungmin felt for the boy named Kyuhyun? He didn’t know, and he never wanted to know. Upset of his own mind for suddenly thinking about that, Hyukjae then snuggled deeper to Donghae’s side, and hugged the servant’s waist comfortably. There were no awkward feelings, just a familiar atmosphere surrounding him. He looked at Donghae’s face a little bit longer, since the moon was full that night, and the light from the fire they lit before made the servant’s face became clearer in the dark.
He thought he was the only one who was staring, when suddenly he realized, the young servant’s eyes were actually opening slightly, looking back into his eyes, giving him a slight of chill down his spine.
“Ouh, you scared me.” Donghae smiled sleepily, and put his cold palm on his Master’s face.
“Master, this Sungmin that we’re going to visit, is he a vampire like you too?” didn’t do anything about the servant’s hand, he closed his eyes and answered;
“Yeah, he is. Why?”
“Nothing. He must be a good vampire like you too.” Hyukjae nodded, and smiled. His face was blushing, Donghae could see that.
“And you love him, right?” he nodded again, but quickly realized that it was a trap. He untangled his arms from the servant’s body, and sat up abruptly. “What are you talking about? I don’t love him!”
The servant sat up too, and lazily moved his butt to be nearer to the Master. “Well, you can say that you love him like a brother. And even if you don’t really love him as a brother, then, just confess you true feelings to him clearly, rather than keeping it inside yourself only.”
Hyukjae never expected this to happen. That his feelings will be revealed by someone that he thought wasn’t smart enough about love and feelings like Donghae.
“I... I... don’t really know about this. Just shut up and go to sleep already.” He lay back onto the thick leather cloth that was used to exclude themselves from the cold floor of the woods, and Donghae followed him a few seconds later with a smile on his face. “You must tell him that you love him, Master.”
“Aish arasso~! Now sleep, brat!”
They both fell asleep, snuggling into each other’s embrace, to avoid the coldness, and Hyukjae never thought that this will be the last night he will see a smile on Donghae’s young face.
-
He woke up the next morning, only to find Donghae’s leather sleeping bag was empty, and the day was snowing like hell. Their campfire has been lit off a long time ago, and coldness would have killed him, if only he was a human.
Picking up his things, he shouted for his servant’s name again and again, and listens to no reply, except for the sounds of his own voice earlier, bouncing back into his ears, echoing through the forest. In his head he thought hard of the possible places that Donghae could’ve been, or anything that happened to the human teenager. Hyukjae was worried, and he never thought that he would ever be this worried for someone like Donghae before.
And when he passed a huge oak tree that was losing its tiny leaves for trying to match with the winter’s need, he spotted a familiar body, leaned against the old tree, with snows covering his clothes, and a pale; no, a blue colour painted on his face for the freezing temperature.
He didn’t remember when did he slide on the wood’s floor and embrace the dying boy, but he could feel the ice-like hands that were touching his tears that flowed from his small eyes. It took him a while to figure out what happened to Donghae, when he saw blood stains on the latter’s coat, that was tore in a place near his ribs.
“Master, I -I managed to save this...from those mobs...”
It was the pocket watch that Sungmin gave him a few years ago when he visited him in France. Sungmin was working as a clocksmith there. The gold watch was his favourite, and he has been holding it as his dearest since he got it.
“Silly. This isn’t worth your life for it, stupid Donghae.” His hands were pulling Donghae’s body much closer to his chest, trying his best to give Donghae the last warmth of his life.
“Master, your heart is beating. Just like a human’s heart does.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“So you’re no different from a human. Your heart is even more beautiful than a human.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“So you don’t have to think of any other ways of being a human, Master, because you’re more human than a human himself.”
“Why are you telling me all these, Donghae? You’re dying for goodness sake!” Donghae then held his hand and smiled. Tears were coming out from both their eyes, and there was no sign for it to stop.
“Because these are all that I’ve wanted to say to you, since the first time we met. I love you, Master.”
And Donghae’s panting breath stopped. Hyukjae’s eyes were widened, if that was even possible. In front of his eyes, a boy that he never thought would become his dearest gone in silence.
Hyukjae bent down, and planted a small kiss on the dead lips. The body that was warm and lively last night, now left cold and inanimate.
“Donghae, I am human, just because you said so.”
-
Hyukjae arrived at Sungmin’s workplace, with a small black ash pot in his hand. He couldn’t hide his tears when he realised that it was Donghae in it all the time. And ironically, when he was there, the whole town was mourning for the loss of the doryeon-nim of a scholar family. And when he saw Sungmin was one of the mourners, he finally figured out that Kyuhyun was dead, too.
“He’s gone, Donghae. Sungmin’s beloved was gone. Just around the time I lost you.”
And in his head, he could see Donghae’s clumsy smile when he smacked the boy’s head after he did something wrong, or the burnt kitchen that was resulted from Donghae’s eagerness to learn how to cook. Donghae’s excited face when he was telling Hyukjae a story, or his sleepy face in the morning when Hyukjae woke him up to accompany him for a business affair.
And he just couldn’t help but wonder why he didn’t fall in love with this kid for all these times they were together.
-
“Hyukjae, this is not right. Our story has ended a long time ago. I don’t love you anymore, Hyukjae.”
“Hyung, haven’t you ever thought, why I helped you all these centuries? Why I let you know all the secrets of the reborn of the souls, why I never been away from you more than a decade?”
“Now I know, how it feels when you love someone who doesn’t love you. So thank you for loving me after all these times, Hyukjae-ah.”
It was the end of 2009, when he confessed his heart to Sungmin once again. A few hundred years before, after they both mourned for their loss, they’ve tried to make this relationship to work, but Sungmin was still waiting for the same man to be loved. Even though Hyukjae was by his side all this time.
He was crying when he was walking back to his shared room with Donghae, when that roommate of his hugged him from the back.
“Eunhyuk-ah, don’t cry.”
“Donghae? Wha - what are you saying? I’m not crying you dumbass.” Trying to smile, he shoved Donghae away, only to be hugged even tighter by the latter. Not feeling energetic to stop the harass, he just stayed like that in Donghae’s arms for a while.
“Don’t cry Eunhyuk-ah.”
“I’m not.”
“At least you’ve confessed to Sungmin hyung. We can never expect everything to happen to our own will. Don’t cry.”
And for some strange reason, he felt incredibly calm inside Donghae’s arms. The warmth that the body projected were wrapping his body, and the familiarity came to him;
As if Donghae was one of his beloved from a long time ago.
“Eunhyuk-ah, can you let me love you?”
“Huh?”
“If you’ve been the only one that loved all this time, then this time, let me be the one that loves you.”
“It takes a lot to love someone like me. Are you ready?” Donghae turned his body around, and gave him a small peck on his forehead.
“From a long time ago.”
And Hyukjae was thinking about having this man as his final love.
Hyukjae finally drank the potion for mortality the next day.
-
“I want to be human,” he said once to his best friend who knew about him, the one that he met after living for two hundred years, “so that I can die, when my age says I should. So that I will only know the people that I befriend with, not their great great grandchildren too.”
The friend laughed, and hugged him. “Don’t worry, if I’m dead before I can marry, you’ll only know me, for I don’t have anyone else in my family, Hyukjae.”
And the friend was right. Two days after saying that, he was killed when his house was robbed.
And Hyukjae lost his best friend again. Maybe this time, this best friend is one of his best best friend. So he decided to erase this best friend’s name and face out of his head.
‘I don’t want to know if I’m going to meet the next Donghae again,’ or so he thought.
‘So that I can fall in love with him in the future, over and over again.'
-The End-