Open Your Heart - Chapter Eleven
Kei tossed and turned in bed, his mind incessantly replaying the moment Ryoko slammed the door as she ran out, tears streaming down her face. I want to talk to her, but there’s no way she’ll listen to me now… I know she will listen to Kota, but if I tell him how I made Ryoko cry, will Kota hate me…? I can’t stop feeling guilty for causing her tears, her sadness, her anger, her frustration… it’s all because of me… it’s all my fault!
Kei covered his face with his pillow and muffled his yell of anguish. Checking his clock, Kei sighed. Two in the morning… I need to get some sleep! He turned over onto his side and closed his eyes.
“NO!!” Ryoko’s scream rang through his ears. “I still think we ought to do something about this…” Yuri’s voice echoed. “Why don’t we just tell Young Master? I mean, technically, it’s all his fault…”
~~~
Kei knocked tentatively on Kota’s bedroom door the following morning. “Kota…?” he called softly. The door quickly swung open to reveal a smiling Kota, who beckoned for Kei to come in.
“Keiko! I was about to call for you! My friend, Daiki, remember him from yesterday? He’s coming over again, but this time, could you call me down instead of calling him up?” Kota requested.
Kei nodded. “Of course, Young Master.” Taking a deep breath, Kei continued. “But I was wondering if I could talk to you for a second, in private,” Kei said quietly, eyes averting Kota’s questioning gaze.
“Sure,” Kota answered as he closing the door behind him. “Kei, what’s wrong? You look pretty beat up,” Kota asked, being sure to address Kei by his real name. Kota’s eyes glimmered with worry as he noticed the dark circles around Kei’s eyes and the deep frown decorating Kei’s face.
He gestured for Kei to sit down next to him on the bed and Kei complied.
“To be completely honest… I made Ryoko cry yesterday…”
“What?! Why?” Kota shifted his position to face Kei straight-on. “Why did you hurt her?”
Kei could feel his eyes beginning to blur as he wanted to yell, “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to!” But, he knew then he’d be lying. He had meant to hurt her.
“Ryoko… did some things to me, and I… overreacted and yelled some really mean words to her…” Kei winced. He didn’t want to sound like he was being a tattletale on Ryoko, but he didn’t want to sound like he was a heartless, cruel person himself. There was no easy way to say this.
“Tell me exactly what happened,” Kota demanded calmly.
Kei felt Kota’s eyes penetrating right through him, right down to his soul. He could never hide the truth from him. Taking another deep breath, Kei decided he could avoid it no longer as he spat out his rushed explanation.
“After Ryoko threatened me to stay away from you, because she thought I was ‘stealing your heart’, she locked me in a closet, and set up a bucket of water to drench me as I felt around desperately in the dark. Then she came to apologize, I think, so I’m guessing she must’ve felt guilty. But when she heard you calling for me, she got all angry and told me to ‘forget it’. Then later, she poured water on me again, and I told her that water wasn’t going to hurt me, her actions were only hurting herself, and I yelled at her…” Kei paused, biting his lip before taking another deep breath, calming himself down so he would speak a little slower. “I ask her if she thought acting this way would win your heart, and of course she said, ‘no’, but she screamed it, and then she ran out of the house, crying as tears ran down her cheeks, and I felt really bad, and I could hardly sleep at all last night, because I was so r-racked with g-guilt, so I c-came to y-you-”
A grief-stricken flood of Kei’s sobs ensued, but he was cut off by Kota as the older boy leaned forward and pulled Kei into his arms. “Kota?” Kei squeaked softly, his eyes inundated with tears.
Without answering, Kota put his hand on the back of Kei’s head and he gently stroked his dark curls. Kei’s breath caught, surprised by Kota’s tender touch.
“Kei, you should have come to me earlier,” Kota murmured softly into Kei’s ear. Hearing Kota’s voice so close, feeling Kota’s arms warmly enveloping him, Kei’s heart starting beating madly and his cheeks crimsoned as his eyes stung with tears.
After what seemed like an eternity in Kota’s arms, Kei pulled away, finding himself finally able to speak. “I am really sorry… Are you mad?” he whispered, looking up into Kota’s dark, deep eyes apprehensively.
When Kei got no response from Kota, he began to panic. “I am really sorry,” he blurted out. “I know it was horrible for me to yell at her, to force tears out of her, but I just felt so angry and frustrated… I know she really cares about you, and you’ve known her for a really long time now, so hearing me say this about what I did probably makes you want to hate me, but I needed to tell you, I wanted to tell you, tell you the truth.” Kei confided, his gaze drifting downward as she spoke.
“Kei…” Kota murmured, lifting Kei’s chin so their eyes met once more. “Trust me, I don’t hate you,” I love you, and seeing you break down like this is breaking me as well. “I’m not mad at you, either,” I’m mad at Ryoko, for hurting you, for causing your tears. Why do you feel so guilty about hurting her anyway? It seems like she’s hurt you so much more…
Placing a chaste kiss on Kei’s forehead, Kota whispered, “I’ll take care of this, don’t worry. You need to get more sleep tonight, okay? Promise me.”
Kei nodded slowly, unsure of how else to respond. His heart was pounding furiously, and his cheeks were now burning red. Why does Kota’s kiss make my body react this way when Yuto’s kiss does nothing? The same spot, their lips both touched my forehead, yet I only yearn for Kota’s kiss…
~~~
Ryoko Yamada stepped into the main convening room after lunch to see Kota Yabu waiting at the foot of the stairs.
“Young Master!” she smiled weakly.
“Ryoko,” Kota frowned. “So this is where you did it, huh?”
“Did what?” Ryoko asked, a little scared by Kota’s sudden fierce tone.
“Where you drenched Keiko with water, the second time,” he stated, crossing his arms in front of his chest.
“Did she tell-”
“Yes, she told me, and I’m glad she did, too. Ryoko, you are the last person I would ever expect to take such rash and hurtful actions. I’ve known you since we were both kids, when your mom first started working here. You’ve always been one of the nicest people I know. Why have things changed? Is it really because you thought Keiko was stealing me from you?”
Ryoko was stunned by Kota’s straightforwardness. “N-No,” she lied, looking away from Kota gaze.
“Ryoko, please, if you won’t tell me the truth even though I’m your Young Master, then at least tell me the truth to prove you even care for me at all-”
“I do care about you!” Ryoko exclaimed. Covering her mouth hastily, she turned away again, disgraced by her outburst.
“Then tell me…” Kota answered softly.
Ryoko sighed. “I did those things because… because I like you, Kota. As in, like like you… I’ve liked you ever since we met, and even though I knew you didn’t like me back, I was willing to wait. I’ve been waiting almost fifteen years now… but now, all of a sudden, this new girl came along and she’s already winning your heart…” Ryoko paused, seeing Kota about to interrupt. “It’s okay, you don’t have to deny it, Kota, I can tell,” she continued, purposefully calling him by his given name rather than “Young Master.”
“I know you well enough to recognize the way you look at her is different from the way you look at everyone else. The way you smile at her, the way you talk to her, there’s something different, and I could tell right away.” Ryoko hung her head in shame. Hearing herself say the words that had been bottled up inside for so long just made the pain within her grow even more. What she didn’t know was the Kota’s next words would hurt her in a way she could have never imagined.
“Ryoko… If you knew how I felt about her, why did you still hurt her?” he said quietly, his voice strained. “How is that caring for me at all?”
Ryoko gasped, Kota’s words were like bullets piercing through her entire body. Everything she had done now seemed so… stupid. Regret washed over her, and she tried to explain herself. “I do care for you-” she repeated before Kota cut her off.
“No. No, you don’t.”
Without another word, Kota turned and walked up the stairs and into his room, shutting the door behind him. Kota’s words resounded in Ryoko’s mind as she collapsed onto the group, crying, just as Kei had done the day before. The only difference was, Ryoko had no one there to comfort her.