It seems I burying my posts tonight...
Ok, I've leaving this up as public for a couple days.. probably just tonigth and tomorrow... cause I know Jackie will have a fit at me if she didn't have a chance to try and "fix" my problem... so to speak. After that, it's going to friends only. My friends are the only ones who really need to see this.
I don't know completely why, but last night after I got home from Folklorama and tonight so far...I'm feeling something between being hyped up and desperately wishing someone was here to talk with. (God I wish Mako would pop up... I think my head needs to be de-freagged or something)
All I can figure out is that after being at the festival... around a bunch of ppl...I guess I feel I've been missing that...missing being around ppl and stuff. If only that were the full case tho. I miss being around "my" people. The Elders. The people I feel are closest to me.
And even now as I think about it... we've diminished so badly lately... everyone busy with their own things. It's been 4 months since Icy's updated her LJ.. a bit less then that since I've talked to her last. I'm worried she's not coming back.
Pun and Skycat have been good for ages and they don't show any sign of coming back.
Mako's MIA too.
Tracks at least pops on every now and then. SO I still get to see him.
Same with MK, I know she's busy with stuff, but I still see her now and again.
Jackie and I are practically phoning each other twice a week if not more sometimes.
Nate and JC are usually on...I know weekends are usually iffy, since there's so many shows they like on.
But with how it stands right now... the past 2 nights(last and tonight), I've been here by myself with no one to talk to. It's stupid really... but ...damnit... it has me wondering if maybe this is the start of the guys going away too..
It's stupid... I know that.. hell I said it... but if I'm going to be freakin' honest with myself... I HAVE to at least acknowledge the fact that I'm absolutely on the verge of having a freakin' break-down... all because I haven't had someone to talk to two nights in a row.
The really bad part is... I KNOW some of you will go into fits of guilt about this and that's the last thing I want to happen cause I KNOW how that is.
I think I need a life...
I don't know completely why, but last night after I got home from Folklorama and tonight so far...I'm feeling something between being hyped up and desperately wishing someone was here to talk with. (God I wish Mako would pop up... I think my head needs to be de-freagged or something)
All I can figure out is that after being at the festival... around a bunch of ppl...I guess I feel I've been missing that...missing being around ppl and stuff. If only that were the full case tho. I miss being around "my" people. The Elders. The people I feel are closest to me.
And even now as I think about it... we've diminished so badly lately... everyone busy with their own things. It's been 4 months since Icy's updated her LJ.. a bit less then that since I've talked to her last. I'm worried she's not coming back.
Pun and Skycat have been good for ages and they don't show any sign of coming back.
Mako's MIA too.
Tracks at least pops on every now and then. SO I still get to see him.
Same with MK, I know she's busy with stuff, but I still see her now and again.
Jackie and I are practically phoning each other twice a week if not more sometimes.
Nate and JC are usually on...I know weekends are usually iffy, since there's so many shows they like on.
But with how it stands right now... the past 2 nights(last and tonight), I've been here by myself with no one to talk to. It's stupid really... but ...damnit... it has me wondering if maybe this is the start of the guys going away too..
It's stupid... I know that.. hell I said it... but if I'm going to be freakin' honest with myself... I HAVE to at least acknowledge the fact that I'm absolutely on the verge of having a freakin' break-down... all because I haven't had someone to talk to two nights in a row.
The really bad part is... I KNOW some of you will go into fits of guilt about this and that's the last thing I want to happen cause I KNOW how that is.
I think I need a life...