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[ayrrie]

It's amazing how much assholes continue to affect your life even after you've dumped them! In this case, in the form of shame spirals while you're trying to sleep.

Good thing I have so much studying to do for exams next week. Distractions!

Comments

[parallax_view]

So you've been beating yourself up? It seems like the time right before sleep is, for some reason, the period where some of us think the most on emotionally draining material. Agonize over loss, blame oneself for things, overanalyze, decide something ambiguous another person said or did means they don't like you, etc. Personally, whatever I could possibly feel bad about in my life, I feel worst about when I'm lying in bed.

If you're calling him an asshole, that's at least a sign that you don't logically believe you deserve all of the blame you're placing upon yourself.

[ayrrie]

I mostly get a shame spiral from how long I stuck around/put up with his bullshit. It was several months too long, and I'm still recovering the self-esteem and security I lost while dating him.

[parallax_view]

That's a shame he was bad enough to affect you that way. You're nice enough, good to talk to, and well, worth bugging for roughly ten years.

[ayrrie]

Holy shit, has it really been that long? Oh my god it has.

You just made me feel old. :P