The ebbs and flows of it all

[azuki_pie]

Here I have sat for an hour and half with no students. I have watched many trailers of up coming films and have picked some that I hope die a quick death and those I am quite interested to see (those of interest include: Food, Inc., It's gonna get loud, and 9). I can't help but wonder at these moments what the fuck I'm doing with my life. We all

Comments

[amandasan]

it's not like i have the answers either, but i just wanted to say try not to be so hard on yourself. maybe i should take my own advice as well, but life isn't a race. having kids or being married or whatever doesn't mean people have it figured out or that they're even happy or stable or anything.
:hugs:

[azuki_pie]

Thanks for the hugs. I don't feel in a race to start a family or get married. It's more that I feel like even if I do find that it could all fall apart (the recent rash of friends splitting). And the being jealous of others si not reserved for those who are in relationships more for those who seem to be living a life I'd prefer to my own. And you are most right that they may seem together on the outside but not at all on the inside. But I can't help but feel I've let myself down. I'm 31 and live with 3 other people whom I don't really know and try to drown my sorrows more often than I should - it's hard NOT to be hard on one's self in this situation but you are right that it isn't going to help anything!

[amandasan]

I'm 31 and am most likely moving into my parents basement in a couple of days! And soemtimes I feel pretty shitty about that. But at the same time, I am trying to see it as the whole Eleanor Roosevelt "No one can make me feel inferior without my consent" kind of thing. I can't tell people what to think or how they're going to think about me, but I can spin it positively if I want to. So hey - you're young, you're having fun, you've got your freedom, you're not tied down... (fill in the blank here) and the rest of the world just has to deal with it :) ok, I'll stop the incoherent rambling now but basically I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone!

[azuki_pie]

That's a great rallying cry! And the only reason I write on here is because I know I'm not alone but at the same time find comfort when people comment and remind me of that fact - so thanks!