[FIC] Comfort, YunChun.
Yes, I got sidetracked and have been writing other plunnies like whoa (including way too much smut inspired by the anon kink meme. anyone interested in reading them? XD). I thankfully got out of jury duty (yes! can do my work now), and won't be called for the next 5 years or so.
In other news, there's a new hot Asian boy that sings at karoake night. He's beautiful and sings amazingly well and I have no courage whatsoever to approach him. *sigh* At least I know his name is Ian. ^^;;
And this is something I wrote a while back, but came back to.
Title: Comfort
Pairing: YunChun
Rating: PG
Genre: angst, slight OOC
Summary: a moment when Yoochun is younger, unsure, and feeling alone.
Despite how things are now, it wasn't Jaejoong who had found him that night so long ago.
"Hyung, I'm doing well right now. I'm working hard. Umma's doing her best too." He can hear the pleading sincerity, the voice pushing so hard to be believed.
"Yoohwan--"
"She's really happy for you, and I am too. You have to become famous and popular and I know we'll all be together again, right?"
Yoochun can't speak; he's already breaking again and it's been months since he's been here already. Shouldn't he be used to the distance by now?
"Aja aja!" He can hear the voice cracking a little and he finds himself trying to smile even though the tears have already begun to pool in his eyes.
"Aja aja hwaiting!" he responds finally, trying to get some semblance of composure. "I promise, I'll make it to the top and we'll be together again. I'll take care of you."
"Promise."
He has to hang up before he starts openly sobbing on the phone. He's tucked himself between the bed and wall, letting them both clench his body tight in a hug. He's always liked to burrow himself in these tight spaces. It makes for good hiding.
Jaejoong hyung had invited him to dinner with his family earlier that day, but it still hurts him to see Jae's umma, to see Jae's sisters and to have Jae's umma hug him and coo over him like another mother. He knows Jae's just trying to help. It doesn't really ease the pain or shorten the distance to America. To be with his family. Together.
He lies down on the carpeted floor, letting his whole body stretch out between the wall and bed. He turns to his side. There are some random things tossed under the bed -- magazines, a bouncy ball, some extension cords. Closing his eyes, Yoochun imagines his brother, smiling and cheerful, of his mother, looking tired but relieved and hoping for the best. He lets the tears flow freely (they wouldn't stop even if he tried).
He's so lost in his thoughts that he can barely react to the bed suddenly thumping down as a body tosses itself on the mattress.
"Shit!" Yoochun's trying to calm his trembling heart.
"The fuck?!" a voice says and a head suddenly peers over the side to stare at Yoochun.
"What are you doing?" Yunho's looking down at him, slightly exasperated.
"Uh, um..." Yoochun feels incredibly stupid and small. Maybe the floor can swallow him up, clothes and all.
"You could've just gotten on the bed. The floor can't be all that comfortable," Yunho says, seeming to pick up on Yoochun's embarrassment and expression softening somewhat.
He quirks a smile, his skin feeling tight with the dried tears on his cheeks.
"Ehehe. Guess it's a habit I've always had since I was little." Thank god the tears had stopped flowing. But he's sure his nose is red and his eyes are puffy.
"Hmmm..." Yunho's purses his lips together as he nods. "I've never been good with tight spaces. Reminds me too much of when I was working all the time. Always loved the open space, air and all that."
They haven't really talked about their lives before they started training. At least, not yet. But Yoochun's heard bits and parts from Jae and he'll sometimes hear Junsu joke about Yunho always crashing at his apartment.
He's not quite sure why he's disclosing this, but somehow the moment seems right and he feels like talking, thinking out loud.
"It makes me feel safe," Yoochun slowly says. He looks away slightly from Yunho, afraid that he will be quick to assess, to assume. But Yunho doesn't say anything at first, letting a rather calm pause linger.
"Maybe that's why I have my Bambi." Yunho's flipped on his back now, holding said stuffed animal in his hands and holding it high towards the ceiling. "It was a gift my younger sister gave me as a joke. But I've held on to it for some time..."
Yoochun sometimes wondered why a teenage boy would insist on holding on to a Disney stuffed animal, especially when Yunho always struck him as strong and confident.
"I sometimes wish I could be there, to make sure she's doing alright, protect her from things. It's what I should be doing, as her oppa." Yoochun hears Yunho sigh. "She's growing up so quickly."
Yoochun swallows.
He wishes he could talk to Yunho, to say what's on his mind, how he feels just like Yunho except with a younger brother. He feels the words on his mouth, but he can't speak, can't say anything yet. He doesn't know them well enough. He can't bear to be seen as weak, useless, a liability to the group.
He doesn't realize he's said Yoohwan's name outloud until Yunho's voice breaks his thoughts.
"He's your younger brother right?"
"Y-yeah..." Yoochun answers, somewhat hesitantly. He doesn't want to say anymore, but Yunho doesn't push him. They lie next to each other, on different levels, staring at the same ceiling above. He's glad that he's lower, that the bed protects him somewhat from Yunho's eyes.
A stuffed deer suddenly enters his vision, floating above his head. Yunho makes it dance and Yoochun has to smile a little.
"That's silly." Yoochun pokes at the stuffed animal.
"Do you want to hold her?" Yunho asks, propping up on his elbows as he leans over the bed. Yoochun wonders if he should point out that Bambi is actually a boy.
"Sure." It's not really relevant though, so he lets it go. He fingers the soft fur, playing slightly with the ears.
He jumps slightly when a hand softly catches a tear on his cheek. Yoochun feels immediately embarrassed and his face turns red. Was he crying? He didn't even realize.
"It's okay if you need to. If you want to use this space and all. I don't mind." Yunho's voice is calm, soothing. "Do you want me to leave?"
He cracks at that, and he crumples his face in his hands, almost squishing the toy in the process. Oh, they're flowing now, no turning back at this point. But he shakes his head at Yunho's question and croaks out a "it's okay."
Yunho doesn't say anything, just squeezes his arm and places a box of tissues next to Yoochun. Yunho's presence is comforting and warm and after a while, Yoochun composes himself and can only smile a thanks to Yunho despite his puffy eyes and runny nose. Yunho ruffles his hair and Yoochun blushes slightly.
It's hours later when he realizes exactly what Yunho had told him last.
"You're so pretty when you cry."
He's not sure if he should feel disturbed or worried. But Yunho is all smiles and normal leader the next day, making him wonder if he just imagined it all.
In other news, there's a new hot Asian boy that sings at karoake night. He's beautiful and sings amazingly well and I have no courage whatsoever to approach him. *sigh* At least I know his name is Ian. ^^;;
And this is something I wrote a while back, but came back to.
Title: Comfort
Pairing: YunChun
Rating: PG
Genre: angst, slight OOC
Summary: a moment when Yoochun is younger, unsure, and feeling alone.
Despite how things are now, it wasn't Jaejoong who had found him that night so long ago.
"Hyung, I'm doing well right now. I'm working hard. Umma's doing her best too." He can hear the pleading sincerity, the voice pushing so hard to be believed.
"Yoohwan--"
"She's really happy for you, and I am too. You have to become famous and popular and I know we'll all be together again, right?"
Yoochun can't speak; he's already breaking again and it's been months since he's been here already. Shouldn't he be used to the distance by now?
"Aja aja!" He can hear the voice cracking a little and he finds himself trying to smile even though the tears have already begun to pool in his eyes.
"Aja aja hwaiting!" he responds finally, trying to get some semblance of composure. "I promise, I'll make it to the top and we'll be together again. I'll take care of you."
"Promise."
He has to hang up before he starts openly sobbing on the phone. He's tucked himself between the bed and wall, letting them both clench his body tight in a hug. He's always liked to burrow himself in these tight spaces. It makes for good hiding.
Jaejoong hyung had invited him to dinner with his family earlier that day, but it still hurts him to see Jae's umma, to see Jae's sisters and to have Jae's umma hug him and coo over him like another mother. He knows Jae's just trying to help. It doesn't really ease the pain or shorten the distance to America. To be with his family. Together.
He lies down on the carpeted floor, letting his whole body stretch out between the wall and bed. He turns to his side. There are some random things tossed under the bed -- magazines, a bouncy ball, some extension cords. Closing his eyes, Yoochun imagines his brother, smiling and cheerful, of his mother, looking tired but relieved and hoping for the best. He lets the tears flow freely (they wouldn't stop even if he tried).
He's so lost in his thoughts that he can barely react to the bed suddenly thumping down as a body tosses itself on the mattress.
"Shit!" Yoochun's trying to calm his trembling heart.
"The fuck?!" a voice says and a head suddenly peers over the side to stare at Yoochun.
"What are you doing?" Yunho's looking down at him, slightly exasperated.
"Uh, um..." Yoochun feels incredibly stupid and small. Maybe the floor can swallow him up, clothes and all.
"You could've just gotten on the bed. The floor can't be all that comfortable," Yunho says, seeming to pick up on Yoochun's embarrassment and expression softening somewhat.
He quirks a smile, his skin feeling tight with the dried tears on his cheeks.
"Ehehe. Guess it's a habit I've always had since I was little." Thank god the tears had stopped flowing. But he's sure his nose is red and his eyes are puffy.
"Hmmm..." Yunho's purses his lips together as he nods. "I've never been good with tight spaces. Reminds me too much of when I was working all the time. Always loved the open space, air and all that."
They haven't really talked about their lives before they started training. At least, not yet. But Yoochun's heard bits and parts from Jae and he'll sometimes hear Junsu joke about Yunho always crashing at his apartment.
He's not quite sure why he's disclosing this, but somehow the moment seems right and he feels like talking, thinking out loud.
"It makes me feel safe," Yoochun slowly says. He looks away slightly from Yunho, afraid that he will be quick to assess, to assume. But Yunho doesn't say anything at first, letting a rather calm pause linger.
"Maybe that's why I have my Bambi." Yunho's flipped on his back now, holding said stuffed animal in his hands and holding it high towards the ceiling. "It was a gift my younger sister gave me as a joke. But I've held on to it for some time..."
Yoochun sometimes wondered why a teenage boy would insist on holding on to a Disney stuffed animal, especially when Yunho always struck him as strong and confident.
"I sometimes wish I could be there, to make sure she's doing alright, protect her from things. It's what I should be doing, as her oppa." Yoochun hears Yunho sigh. "She's growing up so quickly."
Yoochun swallows.
He wishes he could talk to Yunho, to say what's on his mind, how he feels just like Yunho except with a younger brother. He feels the words on his mouth, but he can't speak, can't say anything yet. He doesn't know them well enough. He can't bear to be seen as weak, useless, a liability to the group.
He doesn't realize he's said Yoohwan's name outloud until Yunho's voice breaks his thoughts.
"He's your younger brother right?"
"Y-yeah..." Yoochun answers, somewhat hesitantly. He doesn't want to say anymore, but Yunho doesn't push him. They lie next to each other, on different levels, staring at the same ceiling above. He's glad that he's lower, that the bed protects him somewhat from Yunho's eyes.
A stuffed deer suddenly enters his vision, floating above his head. Yunho makes it dance and Yoochun has to smile a little.
"That's silly." Yoochun pokes at the stuffed animal.
"Do you want to hold her?" Yunho asks, propping up on his elbows as he leans over the bed. Yoochun wonders if he should point out that Bambi is actually a boy.
"Sure." It's not really relevant though, so he lets it go. He fingers the soft fur, playing slightly with the ears.
He jumps slightly when a hand softly catches a tear on his cheek. Yoochun feels immediately embarrassed and his face turns red. Was he crying? He didn't even realize.
"It's okay if you need to. If you want to use this space and all. I don't mind." Yunho's voice is calm, soothing. "Do you want me to leave?"
He cracks at that, and he crumples his face in his hands, almost squishing the toy in the process. Oh, they're flowing now, no turning back at this point. But he shakes his head at Yunho's question and croaks out a "it's okay."
Yunho doesn't say anything, just squeezes his arm and places a box of tissues next to Yoochun. Yunho's presence is comforting and warm and after a while, Yoochun composes himself and can only smile a thanks to Yunho despite his puffy eyes and runny nose. Yunho ruffles his hair and Yoochun blushes slightly.
It's hours later when he realizes exactly what Yunho had told him last.
"You're so pretty when you cry."
He's not sure if he should feel disturbed or worried. But Yunho is all smiles and normal leader the next day, making him wonder if he just imagined it all.