[FIC] Of Sexually Transmitted...
Title: Of Sexually Transmitted...
Pairing: YunChun, JaeSu, JaeMin, HoMin, OT5
Rating: R
Genre: Smut, Crack
A/N: Yay for genderswitch! I've finally written one where they start off as boys. LOL. Anyway, a silly fun romp that I hope you'll enjoy too.
Jaejoong knows it's an emergency, because he can hear Yunho in the bathroom, noisy and cursing and clattering things into the sink and while leader is usually the first one awake, it's 3AM in the morning, way too early, even for him.
He finishes drinking his glass of water and pads over to the bathroom, knocks on the door. The noises cease at once and Jaejoong thinks he hears an intake of breath.
"Yunhoyah? You alright?"
There's no response at first, just a long exhalation of breath before the door suddenly opens and Jaejoong is startled. Is that, are those-- he finds his hands naturally reaching for them before he can even start to ask anything. Yunho swats his fingers away.
"I'm a fucking girl."
It's a riot by 6AM, Yoochun who's more awake than he should ever be at this time, Changmin looking back and forth from Yunho to his computer trying to find out if there's some reasonable scientific explanation, and Junsu babbling, joking around while Yunho looks more and more disgruntled.
Jaejoong doesn't know quite what to think, but calls their manager, tells them that no, they can't do the photoshoot today and could they go on their break a little bit earlier? He wonders if he should tell the truth to the manager (but he'd want proof and Jaejoong doesn't think Yunho would like flashing REAL boobs for a cell phone picture though Yoochun was rather convincing last time and managed to make Yunho do the fake cleavage so maybe Yoochun should convince him this time but then he realizes, fuck it's 6AM, and four guys seeing boobs this early in the morning is not a good idea considering their current state so all he says is).
"We're terribly sick and contagious," cough COUGH hack,"Yunho and Changmin both have an incredible fever and can we do the shoot for after? Junsu got a horrible rash, some allergic reaction and he's puffed up like a fish." Maybe not the most convincing, but it does the trick and he's thankful the shoot is for a photo book, not a magazine with strict deadlines.
He closes the phone shut and looks at Yunho, who seriously looks like he's about to cry. He keeps staring hard at the ceiling, his lips clenched tight and Jaejoong doesn't know quite what to do. He tugs nervously at his hair and is about to approach him when Yoochun beats him to it, just sits next to Yunho and pats her thigh, soft and gentle.
"We'll figure it out, we have time," he says, voice low and calming. Yunho's nose scrunches (oh crap, here it comes, Jaejoong thinks) and the tears burst out and Yunho grabs Yoochun, clings to him, sobs, as Yoochun easily holds him (her?), smooths his hair, and Junsu and Changmin stare.
Jaejoong feels irrationally jealous.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's been a few days and Jaejoong's brushing his teeth when the door suddenly opens and slams close. He jumps, almost swallows his toothpaste, before he realizes it's just Yunho, but wait, there's no boobs and is he back? Jaejoong spits and quickly rinses, about to hug Yunho but there's something off.
"You're back!" Jaejoong exclaims, excitement evident. "How'd it happen?" Yunho suddenly flushes, looks down. But then he suddenly snaps up and looks at Jaejoong.
"Yoochunnie, he uh, he touched me. Shit, I wasn't expecting it and then he started licking me, down there and gods, it felt so damn good and then I passed out and I woke up and, and--" Yunho's babbling, which means something is terribly, terribly wrong.
"And?" Jaejoong prompts.
"Yoochun was lying next to me, except he's. A she."
Yoochun's enjoying it way too much, teasing everyone and anyone in sight and Junsu, well, Junsu gets the worst of it, Yoochun rubs against him, whispers lewd comments in his ear, and Jaejoong really isn't all that surprised when it's only been two days and he wakes up to a horrible screeching. He opens the bathroom door to find Junsu. Or rather, a Junko.
"He, she made me touch him, I mean her, dammit, what was I supposed to do, looked at me like that, I can't believe this, I'm going to KILL hyung and now I have these breasts and I don't know what to do," but Jaejoong's been through this already, he can't take it anymore, he decides to kiss Junsu instead, works on easing the tension, slow and with plenty of tongue and when they break for air, Junsu is staring at him, pupils dark, bosom heaving gloriously.
"I'll change you back," Jaejoong says gallantly, but he knows it's nothing of the sort, fuck, he just loves how Junsu sounds, so breathy and high pitched, panting so desperately until he tastes the salt on his tongue, and Junsu collapses.
He kisses Junsu, tucks him into bed, but finds himself suddenly incredibly drowsy and stumbles, falls into a bed and sleeps.
Jaejoong wakes up to Changmin, staring at him intently. He starts and looks down at himself and notices, yes, he has boobs. Changmin's still assessing him and Jaejoong feels uncomfortable, starts to pull up the blankets. Changmin stops him.
"I guess it's my turn now," he smirks and Jaejoong has never really envied being a woman until that point when he discovers for himself multiple, quick, intense orgasms one after another, that they're real.
He wakes up worried, knowing that to complete the circle, it's Yunho's turn. Changmin seems to have already figured it out and he hears voices.
"Hyung, you have to. Otherwise, I won't turn back into a guy."
"What if I turn back into a girl again and it starts this whole ridiculous cycle?"
"Hyung, do you WANT me to stay as a girl or something? Logically, this is what we need to do."
"Why can't someone else-"
But Yunho's interrupted and there's a rustling noise and some thuds and it gets real, real quiet.
Changmin suddenly moans, hard, high, so full of want and Jaejoong can't take it; he grabs his headphones and listens to Yunho's collection of angry rock music, horrible stuff, lots of screaming, but it helps, and he's distracted.
Finally, finally it's over, except not really, because every time Jaejoong looks at Junsu, all he can think about is how hot Junsu looked in orgasm, damn, how they all looked and he wonders, wonders what it'd be like, would they like the same things, would it be better as guys because then they'd know personally what feels good and it's killing him until it all explodes, after a long stressful PV shooting and they find themselves in the public baths, late at night.
They rarely go to the baths together these days, all five of them at the same time (usually Jaejoong's gone with Yoochun or Changmin), so he doesn't quite realize the strangeness of the moment until he's seated and looks at the other members.
Yoochun almost looks passed out in the water while Changmin and Junsu seem to be bickering about something. He glances over at Yunho, who seems to be thinking of something, so he sidles over. Feeling spontaneous, he pokes Yunho's cheek, quirking a silly grin.
He expects Yunho to smile or laugh, but instead Yunho jumps, splashes water on him instead, leaving Jae to sputter and wipe at his face.
He narrows his eyebrows slightly. Yunho looks aghast and apologetic.
"Sorry Jaejoongie, you caught me by surprise."
Jaejoong sighs and leans back against the tiled tub.
"What's got you so jumpy anyway?" He's expecting something normal, like their schedule or their family but Yunho doesn't say anything, just shakes his head. "C'mon Yunho, you know it´s better just to let it out."
"...keephavingdreams."
Jaejoong furrows his brow.
"You're mumbling, I can't hear a thing. What did you say?" He leans closer to Yunho.
"I keep having dreams. And they won't go away."
"Nightmares? Maybe you need to think of other things, or solve whatever's bothering you." Jaejoong knows how stressed out leadersshi tends to get, knows that sometimes it just explodes over something small.
"Not...nightmares exactly. Just things keep happening in my dreams that aren't really helping."
"Like...?"
Yunho glances quickly at the other members and Jaejoong realizes that it must be something he wants to keep a secret from the others. He's incredibly intrigued and curious now and scoots closer to Yunho.
"Sex. Well. It starts with girls and then it changes. Gah why am I telling you this Jaejoong? Just forget it." Yunho waves his hands and shuts his mouth.
"Wait, wait, how does it change? What happens?" Jaejoong really wants to know now and feels like Yunho's being incredibly unfair to leave it at that.
Yunho sighs, long and hard and seems to be battling some internal battle before he whispers. "Guys. They become guys."
"GUY-"
"Shut up!" Yunho clamps his hand around Jaejoong's mouth and Jaejoong flails awkwardly before regaining his balance. They both look around, but Junsu and Changmin are still arguing and Yoochun is passed out.
"Anyway, yes. You heard me." Yunho looks incredibly tired and massages his forehead with his fingers.
Jaejoong isn't sure why he decides that moment, but the words come tumbling out anyway.
"I have too, with the member-um. But you know, maybe it makes sense because that's who's always around all the time? Just uh, gets ideas into our brains? It's probably not a big--" but Yunho suddenly interrupts him here with a big
"You too?! With the members too?!!"
His shout echoes in the room and they both wince and look over at the other three members. Junsu's mouth is wide open, staring and Changmin has his eyebrow raised. Even Yoochun blinks at them a bit blearily.
"What are you guys talking about anyway?" Changmin asks. He moves closer. "That it would, in fact, warrant a private conversation?" He looks straight at Jaejoong, and Jaejoong swallows, not liking the expression on Min's face at all.
"Nothing, just talking about dreams," Jaejoong responds warily.
Changmin suddenly grins.
"Ah, what was it about? Girls? Sex? Or something innocent like a pool?"
"A p-pool, that was it! I was swimming." Sweatdrops form on Jaejoong's forehead.
"Really, hyung? You know, dreaming of water means you want sex. Did you know that Yunho hyung?"
Yunho looks away and coughs. Junsu has splashed over at this point, bored of poking Yoochun and is looking between his hyungs.
"What's going on now?"
"Oh, hyungdeul want sex apparently. Of course, I hear Yunho sometimes when he's dreaming. He's rather enthusiastic."
"Changminah..." Yunho's looking pissed off and Jaejoong thinks this is really really not a good idea.
"It's only natural, right hyung? Though you did say someone's name..."
"Changmin! We're not talking about this, end of discussion." Yunho's voice is broking no arguments.
"A name?" Yoochun appears out of nowhere and leans in.
"I'm leaving. We have early schedule tomorrow so you guys should leave soon too." Yunho starts to head towards the stairs but Changmin whispers in Jaejoong's ear "It's yours," and Jaejoong finds himself grabbing Yunho's wrist, restraining him. Yunho glares at him.
"What?" he barks.
Jaejoong isn't intimidated though; he's known Yunho for too damn long to fall for that trick.
"I dream about you too," and he stands up, kisses him hard, pushing their bodies close together. Yunho struggles, tries to pull away, but Jaejoong grips him tighter and he's determined.
The fact that his dongsaengs are right there, watching, has conveniently been forgotten until now when he hears a cough and a clearing of throats.
Yoochun looks more awake than he should ever be.
"Sex times now?" His eyes glint. Junsu exclaims in typical dolphin fashion, which makes Jaejoong think of girl orgasming Junsu and his cock twitches.
Yunho seems to be struggling between escaping and wanting to stay, and Jaejoong wonders what to say.
"I have lube!" Changmin exclaims a little too enthusiastically and Jaejoong wonders if the magnae had been planning this, all along.
Jaejoong strokes Yunho's cheek gently, looks up at him, soft and tender.
"Let's fuck."
~~~
As much as Jaejoong enjoys oral, there's nothing quite like being stuffed from both ends and watching two of your dongsaengs fuck each other silly either. He sighs in utter contentment against the futon, feeling utterly debauched.
Yunho is oddly hesitant for some reason and Jaejoong thinks he's being ridiculous. He snuggles and holds his hand and doesn't let go even though Yunho startles and starts to pull away.
"Just admit it. Your subconscious wanted it anyway."
He hears a sigh and Yunho slowly moves closer, letting his hands brush up when they suddenly both realize something.
"Fuck."
Jaejoong has boobs.
~~~~~
A/N: I think I may write up the oneshot of the actual sex scene. X333
Pairing: YunChun, JaeSu, JaeMin, HoMin, OT5
Rating: R
Genre: Smut, Crack
A/N: Yay for genderswitch! I've finally written one where they start off as boys. LOL. Anyway, a silly fun romp that I hope you'll enjoy too.
Jaejoong knows it's an emergency, because he can hear Yunho in the bathroom, noisy and cursing and clattering things into the sink and while leader is usually the first one awake, it's 3AM in the morning, way too early, even for him.
He finishes drinking his glass of water and pads over to the bathroom, knocks on the door. The noises cease at once and Jaejoong thinks he hears an intake of breath.
"Yunhoyah? You alright?"
There's no response at first, just a long exhalation of breath before the door suddenly opens and Jaejoong is startled. Is that, are those-- he finds his hands naturally reaching for them before he can even start to ask anything. Yunho swats his fingers away.
"I'm a fucking girl."
It's a riot by 6AM, Yoochun who's more awake than he should ever be at this time, Changmin looking back and forth from Yunho to his computer trying to find out if there's some reasonable scientific explanation, and Junsu babbling, joking around while Yunho looks more and more disgruntled.
Jaejoong doesn't know quite what to think, but calls their manager, tells them that no, they can't do the photoshoot today and could they go on their break a little bit earlier? He wonders if he should tell the truth to the manager (but he'd want proof and Jaejoong doesn't think Yunho would like flashing REAL boobs for a cell phone picture though Yoochun was rather convincing last time and managed to make Yunho do the fake cleavage so maybe Yoochun should convince him this time but then he realizes, fuck it's 6AM, and four guys seeing boobs this early in the morning is not a good idea considering their current state so all he says is).
"We're terribly sick and contagious," cough COUGH hack,"Yunho and Changmin both have an incredible fever and can we do the shoot for after? Junsu got a horrible rash, some allergic reaction and he's puffed up like a fish." Maybe not the most convincing, but it does the trick and he's thankful the shoot is for a photo book, not a magazine with strict deadlines.
He closes the phone shut and looks at Yunho, who seriously looks like he's about to cry. He keeps staring hard at the ceiling, his lips clenched tight and Jaejoong doesn't know quite what to do. He tugs nervously at his hair and is about to approach him when Yoochun beats him to it, just sits next to Yunho and pats her thigh, soft and gentle.
"We'll figure it out, we have time," he says, voice low and calming. Yunho's nose scrunches (oh crap, here it comes, Jaejoong thinks) and the tears burst out and Yunho grabs Yoochun, clings to him, sobs, as Yoochun easily holds him (her?), smooths his hair, and Junsu and Changmin stare.
Jaejoong feels irrationally jealous.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's been a few days and Jaejoong's brushing his teeth when the door suddenly opens and slams close. He jumps, almost swallows his toothpaste, before he realizes it's just Yunho, but wait, there's no boobs and is he back? Jaejoong spits and quickly rinses, about to hug Yunho but there's something off.
"You're back!" Jaejoong exclaims, excitement evident. "How'd it happen?" Yunho suddenly flushes, looks down. But then he suddenly snaps up and looks at Jaejoong.
"Yoochunnie, he uh, he touched me. Shit, I wasn't expecting it and then he started licking me, down there and gods, it felt so damn good and then I passed out and I woke up and, and--" Yunho's babbling, which means something is terribly, terribly wrong.
"And?" Jaejoong prompts.
"Yoochun was lying next to me, except he's. A she."
Yoochun's enjoying it way too much, teasing everyone and anyone in sight and Junsu, well, Junsu gets the worst of it, Yoochun rubs against him, whispers lewd comments in his ear, and Jaejoong really isn't all that surprised when it's only been two days and he wakes up to a horrible screeching. He opens the bathroom door to find Junsu. Or rather, a Junko.
"He, she made me touch him, I mean her, dammit, what was I supposed to do, looked at me like that, I can't believe this, I'm going to KILL hyung and now I have these breasts and I don't know what to do," but Jaejoong's been through this already, he can't take it anymore, he decides to kiss Junsu instead, works on easing the tension, slow and with plenty of tongue and when they break for air, Junsu is staring at him, pupils dark, bosom heaving gloriously.
"I'll change you back," Jaejoong says gallantly, but he knows it's nothing of the sort, fuck, he just loves how Junsu sounds, so breathy and high pitched, panting so desperately until he tastes the salt on his tongue, and Junsu collapses.
He kisses Junsu, tucks him into bed, but finds himself suddenly incredibly drowsy and stumbles, falls into a bed and sleeps.
Jaejoong wakes up to Changmin, staring at him intently. He starts and looks down at himself and notices, yes, he has boobs. Changmin's still assessing him and Jaejoong feels uncomfortable, starts to pull up the blankets. Changmin stops him.
"I guess it's my turn now," he smirks and Jaejoong has never really envied being a woman until that point when he discovers for himself multiple, quick, intense orgasms one after another, that they're real.
He wakes up worried, knowing that to complete the circle, it's Yunho's turn. Changmin seems to have already figured it out and he hears voices.
"Hyung, you have to. Otherwise, I won't turn back into a guy."
"What if I turn back into a girl again and it starts this whole ridiculous cycle?"
"Hyung, do you WANT me to stay as a girl or something? Logically, this is what we need to do."
"Why can't someone else-"
But Yunho's interrupted and there's a rustling noise and some thuds and it gets real, real quiet.
Changmin suddenly moans, hard, high, so full of want and Jaejoong can't take it; he grabs his headphones and listens to Yunho's collection of angry rock music, horrible stuff, lots of screaming, but it helps, and he's distracted.
Finally, finally it's over, except not really, because every time Jaejoong looks at Junsu, all he can think about is how hot Junsu looked in orgasm, damn, how they all looked and he wonders, wonders what it'd be like, would they like the same things, would it be better as guys because then they'd know personally what feels good and it's killing him until it all explodes, after a long stressful PV shooting and they find themselves in the public baths, late at night.
They rarely go to the baths together these days, all five of them at the same time (usually Jaejoong's gone with Yoochun or Changmin), so he doesn't quite realize the strangeness of the moment until he's seated and looks at the other members.
Yoochun almost looks passed out in the water while Changmin and Junsu seem to be bickering about something. He glances over at Yunho, who seems to be thinking of something, so he sidles over. Feeling spontaneous, he pokes Yunho's cheek, quirking a silly grin.
He expects Yunho to smile or laugh, but instead Yunho jumps, splashes water on him instead, leaving Jae to sputter and wipe at his face.
He narrows his eyebrows slightly. Yunho looks aghast and apologetic.
"Sorry Jaejoongie, you caught me by surprise."
Jaejoong sighs and leans back against the tiled tub.
"What's got you so jumpy anyway?" He's expecting something normal, like their schedule or their family but Yunho doesn't say anything, just shakes his head. "C'mon Yunho, you know it´s better just to let it out."
"...keephavingdreams."
Jaejoong furrows his brow.
"You're mumbling, I can't hear a thing. What did you say?" He leans closer to Yunho.
"I keep having dreams. And they won't go away."
"Nightmares? Maybe you need to think of other things, or solve whatever's bothering you." Jaejoong knows how stressed out leadersshi tends to get, knows that sometimes it just explodes over something small.
"Not...nightmares exactly. Just things keep happening in my dreams that aren't really helping."
"Like...?"
Yunho glances quickly at the other members and Jaejoong realizes that it must be something he wants to keep a secret from the others. He's incredibly intrigued and curious now and scoots closer to Yunho.
"Sex. Well. It starts with girls and then it changes. Gah why am I telling you this Jaejoong? Just forget it." Yunho waves his hands and shuts his mouth.
"Wait, wait, how does it change? What happens?" Jaejoong really wants to know now and feels like Yunho's being incredibly unfair to leave it at that.
Yunho sighs, long and hard and seems to be battling some internal battle before he whispers. "Guys. They become guys."
"GUY-"
"Shut up!" Yunho clamps his hand around Jaejoong's mouth and Jaejoong flails awkwardly before regaining his balance. They both look around, but Junsu and Changmin are still arguing and Yoochun is passed out.
"Anyway, yes. You heard me." Yunho looks incredibly tired and massages his forehead with his fingers.
Jaejoong isn't sure why he decides that moment, but the words come tumbling out anyway.
"I have too, with the member-um. But you know, maybe it makes sense because that's who's always around all the time? Just uh, gets ideas into our brains? It's probably not a big--" but Yunho suddenly interrupts him here with a big
"You too?! With the members too?!!"
His shout echoes in the room and they both wince and look over at the other three members. Junsu's mouth is wide open, staring and Changmin has his eyebrow raised. Even Yoochun blinks at them a bit blearily.
"What are you guys talking about anyway?" Changmin asks. He moves closer. "That it would, in fact, warrant a private conversation?" He looks straight at Jaejoong, and Jaejoong swallows, not liking the expression on Min's face at all.
"Nothing, just talking about dreams," Jaejoong responds warily.
Changmin suddenly grins.
"Ah, what was it about? Girls? Sex? Or something innocent like a pool?"
"A p-pool, that was it! I was swimming." Sweatdrops form on Jaejoong's forehead.
"Really, hyung? You know, dreaming of water means you want sex. Did you know that Yunho hyung?"
Yunho looks away and coughs. Junsu has splashed over at this point, bored of poking Yoochun and is looking between his hyungs.
"What's going on now?"
"Oh, hyungdeul want sex apparently. Of course, I hear Yunho sometimes when he's dreaming. He's rather enthusiastic."
"Changminah..." Yunho's looking pissed off and Jaejoong thinks this is really really not a good idea.
"It's only natural, right hyung? Though you did say someone's name..."
"Changmin! We're not talking about this, end of discussion." Yunho's voice is broking no arguments.
"A name?" Yoochun appears out of nowhere and leans in.
"I'm leaving. We have early schedule tomorrow so you guys should leave soon too." Yunho starts to head towards the stairs but Changmin whispers in Jaejoong's ear "It's yours," and Jaejoong finds himself grabbing Yunho's wrist, restraining him. Yunho glares at him.
"What?" he barks.
Jaejoong isn't intimidated though; he's known Yunho for too damn long to fall for that trick.
"I dream about you too," and he stands up, kisses him hard, pushing their bodies close together. Yunho struggles, tries to pull away, but Jaejoong grips him tighter and he's determined.
The fact that his dongsaengs are right there, watching, has conveniently been forgotten until now when he hears a cough and a clearing of throats.
Yoochun looks more awake than he should ever be.
"Sex times now?" His eyes glint. Junsu exclaims in typical dolphin fashion, which makes Jaejoong think of girl orgasming Junsu and his cock twitches.
Yunho seems to be struggling between escaping and wanting to stay, and Jaejoong wonders what to say.
"I have lube!" Changmin exclaims a little too enthusiastically and Jaejoong wonders if the magnae had been planning this, all along.
Jaejoong strokes Yunho's cheek gently, looks up at him, soft and tender.
"Let's fuck."
~~~
As much as Jaejoong enjoys oral, there's nothing quite like being stuffed from both ends and watching two of your dongsaengs fuck each other silly either. He sighs in utter contentment against the futon, feeling utterly debauched.
Yunho is oddly hesitant for some reason and Jaejoong thinks he's being ridiculous. He snuggles and holds his hand and doesn't let go even though Yunho startles and starts to pull away.
"Just admit it. Your subconscious wanted it anyway."
He hears a sigh and Yunho slowly moves closer, letting his hands brush up when they suddenly both realize something.
"Fuck."
Jaejoong has boobs.
~~~~~
A/N: I think I may write up the oneshot of the actual sex scene. X333