(no subject)
So, as my last post in here for, well, who knows how long, I thought I'd put in the details of Dad's Memorial, including the eulogy I gave on behalf of the family. Behind the cut to save your friend's page:
The service was held in the sanctuary of Bethany UCC in Ephrata, when Troop 38 is sponsored and meets. This was Dad's home Scout troop. We had an hour of greeting before the service began. As Dad was cremated, there was no viewing, simple a single picture of Dad in his Boy Scout uniform. We draped his Wood Badge beads over the frame, placed his OA sash at the base, crossed with a single read rose. We'll get back to that rose in a bit.
I spent most of that hour greeting people I should have known but hadn't seen in almost 2 decades. My father was VERY involved in Scouting, both at the Troop level and also in the district. I would venture that at least half of the people showed up (and there were a lot) knew dad threw Scouts. It was great to see 4 of Dad's Eagles (boys...well, now men a few years younger than me...who joined Troop 38 when Dad was Scoutmaster and got their Eagle under him) show up, on top of a number who were just in the troop but Dad had such an impact on. Of course, there were family, neighbors, coworkers (including those of Mom, Tom, and Tracie), but the popular colors of the night were beige and olive.
The service itself began with a color guard of kids from Troop 38, of which Dad was Committee Chairman until very recently, but was also Scoutmaster of for over a decade. Reverend Truit, who was minister at the family church until a few years ago and who worked with Dad when he was Scoutmaster of his church's troop. He read some scripture, including Psalm 23, which takes on a slightly different meaning when taken from the Scouting slant. After prayer and a message (a well delivered funeral message, but not too different from those you've probably heard), he called people up for sharing.
Tom Spencer was a friend of my father's since they were 12. He shared a side of dad I never saw. A guy who played trombone and loved music, went out on Friday nights after football games, and did all the crazy stuff you expect a teenager to do. He talked about dad falling for mom and how he, Tom, was involved in Scouting but couldn't get dad into it, something they laughed about years later. We'd asked Tom to talk because we thought it was the perfect way to start remembering his life.
Darwin (can't remember his last name) was dad's Assistant Scoutmaster for dad and took over when dad stepped down. He talked about the side of dad most folks there knew. The guy who had fun at camp, would come out of "retirement" to go on canoeing trips to Maine. He talked about things dad talked him, like how to burn a paper bag with eggs and bacon in it. It was generally light and very heartfelt and more thna a few laughs resulted. He got a little choked at the end and forgot a favor I'd asked of him.
Roy, the current Scoutmaster for Troop 38, came up impromptu and talked about the dad's involvement even after he was "out" of the troop for a while. They butted heads a little but came to really like each other. Wood Badge was a bonding point for them as they both ended up as "Beavers" (the name of the patrol, all Wood Badge patrol names are the same and never change, so even though they were years apart in taking the course, they were both "Beavers". We're giving Roy all of dad's old Beaver badges and pins)
No one else rose, so I got up to "close the show". No one else in my family wanted to talk, or at least felt like they could. What follows is what I wrote, which is more or less what I said:
I get to speak on behalf of the family, partially because I'm the performer, and partially because the rest want to see me in front of all of you in my kilt. Before I talk about dad, I'd like to ask all of the Scouts here to stand up. Even if you were once a Scout, please stand and join me if you remember the words. (This is what I had asked Darwin to do, but he forgot. It almost broke me)
The Scout Oath
On my honor I will do my best to do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law;
To help other people at all times; To keep myself physically stong, mentally awake, and morally straight
The Scout Law
A Scout is
Trustworthy
Loyal
Helpful
Friendly
Courteous
Kind
Obedient
Cheerful
Thrifty
Brave
Clean
Reverent
For those of you who don't know, I'm David's oldest...and tallest. It means he got most of his yelling out on me. OK, really he figured out how to yell at me, then got all of it out on Tom so that he was worn out when Tracie came along. Which means she got away with everything.
My memories of dad start in Hawaii, most vividly of him playing with me in the warm water of the ocean. Dad was in the Air Force for over 8 years, which some here may not know. When he left the Air Force we moved around until settling in Ohio. I remember Tom and I would take a cardboard box and cut a slot in the side so we could play with the punch cards and green bar paper he would bring home from work. Of course, in recent years dad would come to Tom and I for technical support. He never could figure out those new fangled PCs.
Just before we moved to PA, dad got what he really wanted; a daughter. He may never have said it, but Tracie was always his favorite. Tom and I were OK with that.
After we moved, thing became pretty well blended with Scouting. It starts with Pine Wood Derbies and Webelos meetings in the firehall basement. When he became Scoutmaster of Troop 252, I naturally followed. Later we went to Troop 44, where I stayed when he and Tom came here to Troop 38. This wasn't dad's first troop, but it was his home troop and he belonged here until the end. Dad and I both became involved in Junior Leader Training. We were both asked individually and I thought I was going to be away from him, but now such luck. This was an area dad excelled at. He wasn't the sort of leader many are. Instead of being the charismatic guy everyone to follow, he wanted the Scouts to lead. Dad was far more interested in creating leaders than being one. Though it was mom who pushed me to become an Eagle, it was dad who helped make me a leader.
Though he seldom showed it in "normal" ways, dad loved his family. From mom, Julie, his bride and number one argument partner, down through his grandkids, Alysa, Tessa, and Ethan or "the boy". Tom and I both benefited from dad's involvement in Scouting, but Tracie remained the apple of dad's eye. He was protective of his little girl. Boyfriends were seldom good enough in dad's opinion. Brian, Tracie's fiancé, seems to have been the exception, partially because he could take dad's ribbing and give it right back. Anyone who knew dad knows how he liked to pick on those he liked. As you can imagine, it is a vital survival skill in the Pasker family! I know dad would have willingly and gladly given Tracie away to Brian at their wedding in May. Even now, I know he won't miss it.
(stepping down from the podium, and trying to keep it together)
When Pooh, the nickname dad gave Tracie that she still has today, turned 16, dad sent her a single red rose. (picking up rose from in front of dad's picture) This rose won't last until May, but the petals will. (gave rose to mom, who gave it to Tracie)
Reverend Truitt lead a closing prayer and benediction. The Scouts retired the colors while their SPL played Taps, the only music for the entire service.
The service was held in the sanctuary of Bethany UCC in Ephrata, when Troop 38 is sponsored and meets. This was Dad's home Scout troop. We had an hour of greeting before the service began. As Dad was cremated, there was no viewing, simple a single picture of Dad in his Boy Scout uniform. We draped his Wood Badge beads over the frame, placed his OA sash at the base, crossed with a single read rose. We'll get back to that rose in a bit.
I spent most of that hour greeting people I should have known but hadn't seen in almost 2 decades. My father was VERY involved in Scouting, both at the Troop level and also in the district. I would venture that at least half of the people showed up (and there were a lot) knew dad threw Scouts. It was great to see 4 of Dad's Eagles (boys...well, now men a few years younger than me...who joined Troop 38 when Dad was Scoutmaster and got their Eagle under him) show up, on top of a number who were just in the troop but Dad had such an impact on. Of course, there were family, neighbors, coworkers (including those of Mom, Tom, and Tracie), but the popular colors of the night were beige and olive.
The service itself began with a color guard of kids from Troop 38, of which Dad was Committee Chairman until very recently, but was also Scoutmaster of for over a decade. Reverend Truit, who was minister at the family church until a few years ago and who worked with Dad when he was Scoutmaster of his church's troop. He read some scripture, including Psalm 23, which takes on a slightly different meaning when taken from the Scouting slant. After prayer and a message (a well delivered funeral message, but not too different from those you've probably heard), he called people up for sharing.
Tom Spencer was a friend of my father's since they were 12. He shared a side of dad I never saw. A guy who played trombone and loved music, went out on Friday nights after football games, and did all the crazy stuff you expect a teenager to do. He talked about dad falling for mom and how he, Tom, was involved in Scouting but couldn't get dad into it, something they laughed about years later. We'd asked Tom to talk because we thought it was the perfect way to start remembering his life.
Darwin (can't remember his last name) was dad's Assistant Scoutmaster for dad and took over when dad stepped down. He talked about the side of dad most folks there knew. The guy who had fun at camp, would come out of "retirement" to go on canoeing trips to Maine. He talked about things dad talked him, like how to burn a paper bag with eggs and bacon in it. It was generally light and very heartfelt and more thna a few laughs resulted. He got a little choked at the end and forgot a favor I'd asked of him.
Roy, the current Scoutmaster for Troop 38, came up impromptu and talked about the dad's involvement even after he was "out" of the troop for a while. They butted heads a little but came to really like each other. Wood Badge was a bonding point for them as they both ended up as "Beavers" (the name of the patrol, all Wood Badge patrol names are the same and never change, so even though they were years apart in taking the course, they were both "Beavers". We're giving Roy all of dad's old Beaver badges and pins)
No one else rose, so I got up to "close the show". No one else in my family wanted to talk, or at least felt like they could. What follows is what I wrote, which is more or less what I said:
I get to speak on behalf of the family, partially because I'm the performer, and partially because the rest want to see me in front of all of you in my kilt. Before I talk about dad, I'd like to ask all of the Scouts here to stand up. Even if you were once a Scout, please stand and join me if you remember the words. (This is what I had asked Darwin to do, but he forgot. It almost broke me)
The Scout Oath
On my honor I will do my best to do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law;
To help other people at all times; To keep myself physically stong, mentally awake, and morally straight
The Scout Law
A Scout is
Trustworthy
Loyal
Helpful
Friendly
Courteous
Kind
Obedient
Cheerful
Thrifty
Brave
Clean
Reverent
For those of you who don't know, I'm David's oldest...and tallest. It means he got most of his yelling out on me. OK, really he figured out how to yell at me, then got all of it out on Tom so that he was worn out when Tracie came along. Which means she got away with everything.
My memories of dad start in Hawaii, most vividly of him playing with me in the warm water of the ocean. Dad was in the Air Force for over 8 years, which some here may not know. When he left the Air Force we moved around until settling in Ohio. I remember Tom and I would take a cardboard box and cut a slot in the side so we could play with the punch cards and green bar paper he would bring home from work. Of course, in recent years dad would come to Tom and I for technical support. He never could figure out those new fangled PCs.
Just before we moved to PA, dad got what he really wanted; a daughter. He may never have said it, but Tracie was always his favorite. Tom and I were OK with that.
After we moved, thing became pretty well blended with Scouting. It starts with Pine Wood Derbies and Webelos meetings in the firehall basement. When he became Scoutmaster of Troop 252, I naturally followed. Later we went to Troop 44, where I stayed when he and Tom came here to Troop 38. This wasn't dad's first troop, but it was his home troop and he belonged here until the end. Dad and I both became involved in Junior Leader Training. We were both asked individually and I thought I was going to be away from him, but now such luck. This was an area dad excelled at. He wasn't the sort of leader many are. Instead of being the charismatic guy everyone to follow, he wanted the Scouts to lead. Dad was far more interested in creating leaders than being one. Though it was mom who pushed me to become an Eagle, it was dad who helped make me a leader.
Though he seldom showed it in "normal" ways, dad loved his family. From mom, Julie, his bride and number one argument partner, down through his grandkids, Alysa, Tessa, and Ethan or "the boy". Tom and I both benefited from dad's involvement in Scouting, but Tracie remained the apple of dad's eye. He was protective of his little girl. Boyfriends were seldom good enough in dad's opinion. Brian, Tracie's fiancé, seems to have been the exception, partially because he could take dad's ribbing and give it right back. Anyone who knew dad knows how he liked to pick on those he liked. As you can imagine, it is a vital survival skill in the Pasker family! I know dad would have willingly and gladly given Tracie away to Brian at their wedding in May. Even now, I know he won't miss it.
(stepping down from the podium, and trying to keep it together)
When Pooh, the nickname dad gave Tracie that she still has today, turned 16, dad sent her a single red rose. (picking up rose from in front of dad's picture) This rose won't last until May, but the petals will. (gave rose to mom, who gave it to Tracie)
Reverend Truitt lead a closing prayer and benediction. The Scouts retired the colors while their SPL played Taps, the only music for the entire service.