Comments | balladsofmirth: To be lost in the forest

balladsofmirth

To be lost in the forest

Oct 14, 2009 00:33

Writing a 4,000 travel guide about Australia causes me to 1. miss my friends who now live there and 2. wish I could travel abroad, which isn't possible just yet. Gotta save up the pennies to square away my finances - finally - and save for the move/apartment business. Good thing = when I'm ready to travel, I can not only experience a new place ( ( Read more... )

note to self, i want to make a universe of facts to be, tug me babe, fireflies, don't be offended, neil gaiman, stars, to be caught adrift, peripheral views, travel guides, to be lost in the forest, australia, jason jagel

Comments 12

gallion_dlareth October 14 2009, 17:09:43 UTC

I love, love, love Neil Gaiman.

balladsofmirth October 14 2009, 20:31:22 UTC

Oh Jen, me too.

smarthinking lightup_tea October 14 2009, 19:17:35 UTC

Re: Smarthinking, something I've been wondering about is possible days I wouldn't be able to fulfill a shift. For example, if I need to take a plane somewhere, or there's some other important thing I need to do. Have you ever needed to find a substitute and is it difficult to find someone?

Also, you tell them how many hours you want to work, right? They said 10-12 is min. and I want to do only ten.

Re: smarthinking balladsofmirth October 14 2009, 20:30:56 UTC

There is a subbing system called Aspect. If you can not work a shift, you can post it for other people to take. If no one will take your shift, I've found that the Smarthinking staff are incredibly understanding. They've dropped many hours for me when I've had to travel/fallen ill, etc. As long as you post your need of a sub early on, it shouldn't be an issue. If you post just before you need to leave, you'll still be fine.

You not only tell them how many hours you want to work, but you enter in your availability via Aspect: which days of the week you can work and which hours. I've found that they are great about giving hours within these parameters.

At first, the Aspect system may seem confusing. I promise it gets easier to navigate the more you use it.

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balladsofmirth October 14 2009, 20:34:20 UTC

Yes. Yes.

I've also considered that though people may not want/be able to be in my life in the present, that this does not eliminate such hope for the future. I'm learning to ease my expectations a bit.

For example, one of my teens suffers from shiny object syndrome: he can only see what is directly in front of him. I know he adores me to BITS, but when I'm not physically in Boston, his communication with me is erratic. It's been an important lesson for me. I've never been angry with him over missed phone calls or silence for days at a time, but this patience is something I'm working on transferring into other areas of my life.

Am I making sense? I guess I'm saying that the quotation is important, but that it doesn't always mean the snipping of cords.

And of course, friendship is a two-way street: each party has to uphold their end of the deal.

/Ramble.

Yes, that note was excellent. wolodymyr October 14 2009, 23:15:23 UTC

Actually, I've been in a two-day funk over my parents. Who, you know, were abusive. Abusive! And yet I keep some days being sunk in this notion that I owe it to them to try more, try harder, fix it, etc. etc.

My father has a tendency to forget my name. My mother used my birthday as an occasion to stalk my boyfriend - and she had the wrong day.

If they really wanted what their occasional plaintive Hallmark cards say they want, they'd have found a way to let me know.

Re: Yes, that note was excellent. balladsofmirth October 14 2009, 23:27:29 UTC

I think we sometimes we forget that we deserve as much as put out. It's okay, sometimes, to take a step back.

Easier said than done, I know.

It's a two-way street. It's okay to hold up signs and give out maps to help people find this street and even to identify its contents, but they have to make an effort. Yes.

Did something trigger your funk? I know it's not always something as "simple" as that.

Do the parents have positive qualities? Do they live in the same area?

Thread 7

astaria51 October 15 2009, 10:06:01 UTC

The guide to Australia sounds fantastic! I wish I could go too - I've got friends who live there, too, and I'd love to be able to visit someday.

I love Neil Gaiman. Sigh.

I really needed that note to self. ...and maybe I needed it not only to remind myself to stop stressing over a situation where I don't feel cared about, but to remind myself that I can be that person too, to take the initiative to repair a friendship.

Love this post. (Also, hi! I feel like we haven't talked much lately.)

balladsofmirth October 15 2009, 18:29:53 UTC

The guide was a lot of fun. I want to spend equal parts of my time schlepping around the museums and taking in the architecture/city life in Sydney as I do want to experience the "flamingo-red sunsets" and living in the Outback. It's hard to have so many friends in a place that is so far away ( ... )