I know exactly how you feel. Even though our situation is different, my dad obviously is gone and he is who I depeneded on, who I talked to about personal problems, and all of that. It is so hard, I'm not going to lie, but I've figured out that everything happens for a reason. I'm here for you if you need anything, and yes you can take me up on that. Hang in there.
Even if your mom doesn't want you to stay in contact, she would have to understand that you can't be expected just to forget him and how much he meant to you. The fact that you call him dad should mean something, and surely he will want to still see you too. I hope things work out, but if they don't know that you will be okay eventually. My parents split when I was 14 and divorced when I was 15... very different situation, but I know the pain involved, and the fear... and the anger. Hang in there, girl, and keep crying if that's what you have to do to get through it.
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You could still keep contact with him. Just because he isn't with your mom anymore doesn't mean he can't still be your father.
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