Glee - All The Good Ones (Kurt/Blaine, Rachel/Kurt, PG-13) 2/2
Title: All the Good Ones (This is a Gayvention) 2/2
Author: batgurl88
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 11,784
Pairings: Rachel/Kurt (onesided), Kurt/Blaine (established), past Rachel/Finn
Summary: Rachel falls in love with Kurt. Blaine and Finn aren't pleased. From a prompt on the Angst Meme.
A/N: Most of this was written before we started getting spoilers for S3, so ignore the fact that one of the songs ended up being used on the show. Set somewhere between 'Born This Way' and 'Prom Queen', so Rachel and Kurt's friendship is still in the middle of that awkward transition phase.
Major thanks to B for the beta and rec! Any additional mistakes are my own. And props to penelopesfriend for all the help/support.
Part One
-
The glee club was unruly as usual, Rachel's fellow teammates a loud and immature crowd with no appreciation for proper decorum. She herself sat attentive in the front row, steadfastly ignoring the odd looks Finn had been shooting her when he thought Quinn wasn't looking.
She hadn't been able to secure a seat next to Kurt - Tina and Mercedes had walked in alongside him, leaving her with little opportunity - so, instead she'd made sure to sit directly in his eyeline. He'd spend the whole glee practice unable to stop himself from noticing her.
It was a good thing she'd gone with the red-and-white printed dress that morning instead of the faux-ripped beige one - the giant bell-shaped hips would be sure to catch his eye where they hung out over her chair.
Even if it was really hard to sit without rolling off the side.
The last to enter, Mr. Schuester gave them all a big smile, setting down his messenger bag.
"You guys did a great job with the passion assignment," he said, stopping in the middle of the room. "But I really think we need to get back to our roots."
He clapped his hands, looking excited. "I know we had some issues the last time we tried West Side Story, but I think it has just the right blend of passion and romance for us."
Rachel bounced in her seat, the hoop of her dress adding an extra wobble to her enthusiasm. This was perfect - another chance for her to claim her rightful place as Maria. The daily notes she slipped under the door of Mr. Schuester's office must have finally paid off.
And she knew just who she wanted to play her Tony.
Mr. Schuester was still talking, handing out stacks of sheet music to everyone.
"The judges really seemed to like our romantic duets at past competitions, and I think this could be a great song for Nationals."
Rachel glanced down at the sheet she was handed, another rush of excitement going through her at seeing 'Somewhere' written at the top.
Immediately, she raised her hand and stood, cutting off whatever their teacher was saying.
"Mr. Schue, if I may," she said, smiling graciously to her fellow glee club members as she gained their attention. "I think Kurt and I would be perfect for this duet. Our voices blend like they were made for each other, and our natural chemistry while singing will be just what we need to win Nationals."
She could feel the others' eyes on her. They were probably wondering how she managed to come up with so many great ideas.
Mr. Schuester sighed.
"Rachel, we already talked about this at Sectionals. You and Finn can't always just-" he stopped, frowning. "Wait, you and Kurt?"
Her smile widened as he stared at her. This was a brilliant plan - singing this duet with Kurt at Nationals would require them to be around one another constantly. And once their overwhelming romantic tension was met with a dark auditorium and the power of Sondheim's lyrics, Kurt would have no choice but to succumb to his hidden feelings and admit they were soulmates.
Looking uncertain, Mr. Schuester turned his attention behind her. "Kurt?" he asked.
Kurt was obviously trying to contain his excitement, still sitting primly in his seat. His good posture was really quite admirable. "Far be it from me to refuse a solo. And West Side Story is a particular favourite of mine."
"O-okay, then," Mr. Schue nodded, trying to smile. "I guess we've got our two soloists."
Sitting back down again, Rachel nodded to herself. Everything was working out perfectly.
*
Taking a deep breath - which was harder than one might think, given the tight boning of her new black tulle dress - Rachel smiled at her reflection in her locker mirror. She grabbed a yellow star-shaped notepad off the top shelf (a gift from her dads after her eighth consecutive Junior Miss Ohio Tap Dance win) and flipped it open.
There, carefully written in rich blue ink, were the steps of her 'Get Kurt to Fall in Love With Me' plan, her smile growing with each check-mark. Finn often criticised her for being too goal-oriented, but Rachel knew that a healthy sense of accomplishment was not only important, but necessary for achieving true success in life. It may not have looked like it, but she was within days of having Kurt as her boyfriend.
Sure, Kurt was still somewhat hesitant toward her, but little by little she was wearing him down with compliments and her charismatic presence.
She shut her locker and began walking a bit unsteadily down the hall. The black studded lace-up ankle boots she'd let Kurt pick out for her were taller than she was used to, and the stiff fabric of her long-sleeve dress itched, but the way Kurt had glanced almost approvingly at her ensemble that morning had made it all worth it.
The makeover had gone a long way in softening Kurt up, but Rachel knew she'd require a secret weapon in order to seal the deal. If she wanted to get Kurt, then she needed advice from the only other person who'd done it.
"I need to speak with you."
Brittany frowned. "Are you the wicked witch? I don't have a dog for you to take, and Lord Tubbington hates long car rides."
Rachel faltered, looking down at her outfit uncertainly, but quickly regained her composure.
"While I normally pride myself on remaining above the common gossip that runs rampant in our school, there are some things one simply can't help but overhear, and it is my understanding that you and Kurt dated briefly last year."
"His face was soft like a bunny's," the other girl said vaguely. Rachel chose to take it as a confirmation. While she found conversations with Brittany a strange and uncomfortable experience, Rachel was confident that somewhere in her very odd ramblings lay the secret to winning Kurt's heart.
Preparing her notepad, her pen poised just above the paper, she smiled indulgently.
"How exactly did you get him to date you?"
Brittany tilted her head. "Well, I asked him if he wanted to tap this, because he reminded me of the big lumberjack from those paper towel commercials, and cleaning products are really hot."
Rachel furrowed her brow, writing 'Tap this?' in her perfect penmanship.
"I see," she said, reading the next question on her notepad. "And what sorts of activities did the two of you participate in together?"
"Sometimes we made out, but usually just when his dad was there," Brittany said, her face screwed up in thought. "Mostly we talked about My Little Pony and he did my nails. He helped me pick out a new raincoat for Lord Tubbington, because his old one didn't match his sunglasses."
Nodding her head, Rachel wrote furiously.
Possible Shared Activities:
- Couple's manicures
- Animal rights protest
- Exhibitionism?
Clearly she had her work cut out for her, but Rachel was positive that if Brittany could win Kurt over, she could as well.
"One last question," she said, smiling brightly. "What kind of kisser would you describe Kurt as - is he sweet and romantic, or does he have more of a passionate, take-charge style?"
While she was confident after dating Puck that she could make herself compatible with any type, it never hurt to be prepared, and knowing his style ahead of time would assist her in putting together an appropriate playlist of make-out songs.
"He kinda laid there like a hotdog without a bun," said Brittany, staring blankly into the distance. "But then we stopped making out because he started dressing like a Ken doll again, and Santana said that meant he was back to being gayer than Clay Aiken."
She stopped and turned to look at Rachel, her hands gripping the straps of her backpack. "You can tell Kurt if he wants to get back together, he's too late. I'm already dating Artie, and they have the same plumbing, so I can only sleep with one of them."
Rachel opened her mouth to reply, before realising she had nothing to say to that. She tilted her head in confusion, but Brittany was already leaving, the stuffed head of her unicorn backpack nodding in time as she walked.
*
Breadstix was fairly empty, that one older waitress who always seemed to be on-shift standing idly in the corner looking bored. She'd moved forward in interest when Rachel entered, but Rachel had waved her off, surveying the thin crowd. She quickly found what she was searching for.
Kurt and Blaine were seated across from each other, their heads bent forward over their clasped hands on the table, talking. The smiles on their faces were small, but familiar, both of them speaking too softly to hear.
"Hey, guys!" she said, sliding into the booth next to Kurt. "What are you up to?"
The two boys stared at her a moment before dropping their hands awkwardly and leaning back in their seats.
"Having dinner. Alone," Kurt said tersely. Their date must not have been going well.
Rachel smiled widely. "Great! I'm starving," she said, unbuttoning her red wool cape as she settled in comfortably next to him. The soft lighting really brought out his cheekbones.
Blaine shifted a bit in his seat.
"Don't you have dance practice right now, Rachel?"
"Yes," she said, pulling her cape off and laying it beside her, taking the opportunity to move that much closer to Kurt. She bet he was a great cuddler. He was taller than Blaine, but she was sure her head could rest comfortably on his shoulder without any unnecessary neck strain. Unlike with Finn.
She smiled again, directing her reply at Kurt. "Unfortunately our instructor has come down with a severe case of syphilis, so practices are cancelled until further notice. I offered to teach the class myself, but none of the other students were willing to concede to my leadership."
Although Rachel knew how important her dance classes were - a well-rounded portfolio would be her ticket to Julliard - Mr. Tische's bad luck actually worked in her favour. It allowed her further opportunity for her ongoing plan: be everywhere Kurt is. The more Kurt saw of her, the more he would think of her, making her too important to forget.
Soon enough, Kurt would come to anticipate her presence - even rely on and expect it.
She waved a hand in the air, flagging the waitress down.
"Anyway, with my whole evening wide open, I simply had to track Kurt down and tell him about this amazing new sheet music store I saw." She'd already special-ordered their matching copies of the complete Bye Bye Birdie soundtrack. She'd always thought she'd make a wonderful Kim MacAfee.
The waitress pulled out her pad and pen. "Can I get you something?"
Kurt and Blaine exchanged a look.
"Uh, Rachel-"
"Yes, I'll have a lemonade, and whatever Kurt's having as long as it's vegan," she answered, wrapping a hand around Kurt's arm in indication. Kurt gently removed it. He seemed very reluctant about public displays of affection. She'd have to work on that.
She turned back to the two boys as the waitress left, finding them both staring silently into space. Mentally, she checked another point off for herself - such deep-rooted communication problems were an obvious death knell for any relationship.
It was a good thing she'd turned up, or Kurt's night might have been awful.
*
Blaine rocked back on his heels, feeling a little out-of-place.
The front door of the Berry household was bright red, which made the part of Blaine that could easily spend most of the morning laughing at one of Jeff's terrible puns wonder if it had anything to do with their last name. The last time he'd been there, it'd been a lot darker, and he'd been distracted by those tight pants Kurt had been wearing - which sort of resembled bondage gear now that he thought about it - and worrying about making a good impression on his friends.
Now, though, standing alone on the welcome mat with its slightly disturbing big-eyed cat grinning up at him, he found himself wondering whether Rachel's dads had chosen the colour because they thought it was funny or simply because it was attention-grabbing.
Finally, the door opened to reveal Rachel. She was dressed in an off-white wrap he was pretty sure he'd seen Kate Middleton wearing to a museum opening last month (Blaine was still really amazed Kurt had managed to find so many high-fashion clothes for her in Lima, but then again, Kurt had a knack for doing the impossible).
She stiffened as she caught sight of him, her eyes widening a bit beneath the long red feathers of her ornate fascinator hat.
"Oh, hello, Blaine."
He smiled politely. "Hey, Rachel. Is it all right if I talk to you for a minute?"
She tilted her head to the side. "Of course," she said after a moment, beckoning him into her home with a sweep of her arm. He kind of liked that about Rachel - everything was like an old-fashioned movie with her.
The inside of the Berry household was as immaculate as the outside. He hadn't caught more than a glance at the upstairs the last time he'd been there because Rachel had been adamant about not leaving Puck alone in the basement too long without her supervision. Now, though, he could see pictures of her everywhere as they walked into the living room, only to be met with an ornate trophy case displaying several pairs of bronzed ballet shoes and more trophies than a Toddlers and Tiaras pageant.
"Um, that's quite the collection," he commented awkwardly, realising he'd been staring. It'd probably seemed impolite.
Rachel thanked him with a smile. "It's just a small portion of the honours I've received - my dads are in the process of redoing the spare bedroom to turn it into an appropriate show room for my awards. They want to ensure my entire career is properly documented for when I achieve worldwide fame."
Blaine had no idea what to say to that, except that it was comments like that that made him remember why Rachel was the way she was, so instead he settled for what he hoped was a supportive smile.
She gestured to a striped couch in front of the living room window, taking a seat herself in the chair directly across from it. Blaine sat, doing his best to ignore his surroundings.
Rachel shifted in her seat, a reluctant and falsely-detached expression on her face. "Not to be rude, but I have a meeting with the Black Student Union in half-an-hour and we're going to be voting on my suggestion for a musical re-telling of the Harriet Tubman story for next month's fundraiser."
Clasping his hands in front of him, Blaine organised his thoughts. He'd decided ahead of time that the best tactic was to be honest, and to approach the issue rationally.
"Kurt doesn't know I'm here," he said up front. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel embarrassed at the thought of them talking about her behind her back.
At Rachel's nod, he continued.
"You know Kurt and I don't get to spend as much time together as we used to since he transferred," he said, leaning forward to rest his forearms on his knees.
A smug look crossed Rachel's face, though she tried to hide it. "Long-distance relationships are generally unsuccessful in people our age," she said, overly-earnest. "I know from experience. Maybe you and Kurt should consider whether you're truly ready to tie yourselves to a relationship that might be doomed to failure."
He felt a surprising twinge of resentment at the dig about their relationship - the distance between them was a bit of a sore spot for him - but Blaine ignored it. Rachel was only lashing out due to her own insecurities.
"Regardless of that, we still enjoy spending time together," he said evenly, looking her in the eye. "And while I'd never suggest that you and Kurt should see less of each other, I can't help but notice that you've shown up on every one of our dates this week. And that's not really fair to Kurt and I."
Rachel was sitting ramrod-straight in her chair, her eyes guarded. "Kurt enjoys spending time with me." Blaine thought that might be stretching the truth a little bit, but it wasn't his place to comment. "You can't decide who he is and isn't friends with. There are pamphlets on things like that."
He held up his hands defensively. "Believe me, I have no intention of telling Kurt who he can be friends with. I just think it's a little inconsiderate of you to keep inviting yourself along on our dates when Kurt and I get to spend so little time together as it is. And, frankly, Rachel, your behaviour lately has been a little-" he winced, searching for the right word- "Inappropriate."
She huffed. "I don't know what you're talking about."
He scratched the back of his neck. He hadn't meant to bring it up so bluntly, but he knew it needed to be said. "Look, don't take this the wrong way, but it's been pretty obvious that you've developed...feelings for Kurt."
Rachel's cheeks reddened slightly, but her expression quickly turned defensive. "I don't see why that should bother you," she said.
Blaine sighed. "You know how girls sometimes say all of the best guys are either gay or taken?" he asked, waiting for a nod from Rachel before he continued. "Well, Kurt's both."
Rachel frowned.
"How do you know?" she asked. "Everyone always just assumed he was gay, but maybe he didn't get a chance to consider whether he likes girls. Or maybe he's bi. You can't say for sure."
Wincing a bit, Blaine sat back. Another sore spot - Rachel seemed to have a knack for finding them. "Would you say that to your dads, Rachel?"
She shrugged, a carefully unaffected look on her face. "That's different - they're both a lot older than Kurt. This is the time in our lives when we're supposed to be figuring these sorts of things out. For all we know, I could be doing Kurt a favour."
In general, Blaine liked Rachel, but it was moments like this one where he really understood Kurt's constant frustration with her.
He glanced to the side, considering a different approach.
"Look, I'd like to think the two of us are friends now, right?" he said, raising his eyebrows entreatingly.
She considered it for a moment before nodding her agreement.
"Well, then," he said slowly, working through the wording, "as your friend, I don't want to see you get hurt by falling for someone who can't return your feelings. I think you're just setting yourself up for disappointment."
Rachel was silent, hurt flashing briefly in her eyes before a look of hard determination settled on her features.
"I'm sorry that you're jealous of what Kurt and I share," she said quietly, her voice like steel. "But you need to accept that you may not be the best thing for him."
She tilted her head in a manner she probably thought exuded sympathy. "You're a good showman, Blaine, and admittedly quite attractive, but I'm a vastly superior singer and Kurt and I share a much longer history. I only hope there will be no hard feelings between us when Kurt chooses our Broadway-destined romance over you."
The twinge of irritation Blaine had felt earlier returned.
"Rachel, this isn't like when you and I went on that date. Kurt isn't questioning himself - he's gay."
She shook her head.
"You don't know every thought that goes through Kurt's mind. How do you know for sure he isn't interested?"
Blaine bit the inside of his cheek, feeling like he was in a punching match against a brick wall. "Fair enough," he conceded. "I don't. But even if Kurt were bi, we're still dating. And frankly, your behaviour has been bordering on rude."
He met her gaze head-on, his expression softening. "I mean, how would you feel if I acted like that to someone you were seeing?"
He was aware he was pleading, but he really wasn't sure how else to appeal to her. Rachel was used to viewing things only from her perspective, but maybe with a bit of prodding, she would see how her behaviour was affecting others.
For a second, he thought it might have worked, Rachel's gaze darting to the side uncertainly, her posture not as stiff. Her eyes were shining a bit as she turned back, but he was disappointed to see their sense of determination had not faded.
"I think if you're that insecure about your and Kurt's relationship, then maybe you should reconsider whether or not you're truly invested in it," she said shortly, the edges of her mouth pulled down in an unhappy line. "I'll stop showing up on your dates, but mostly because that much coffee consumption isn't good for my voice. You should both really think about finding another shared activity. But I'm not going to give up."
She stood, flicking a loose feather from her fascinator out of her eyes. "I assure you I won't hold any of this against you when Kurt and I are co-starring in this summer's community theatre production of Into the Woods. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to finish writing a song about abolitionism."
*
Blaine and Kurt were spread out on Kurt's bed, the door to his room open just past the acceptable limit. Blaine was propped up against the headboard, his chemistry textbook opened on his lap, while Kurt lounged on his stomach beside him reading a magazine. McKinley's schoolwork was a lot easier than Dalton's, and he always finished his before Blaine, but Kurt had still managed to convince his dad that they needed these nightly 'homework dates.'
Blaine didn't mind one bit. It was nice spending time with Kurt, and studying alone at Dalton just hadn't been the same since he left.
Today, though, his mind couldn't be further from his schoolwork, a gnawing feeling in the pit of his stomach. He'd re-read the same line five times already, and if anything, his focus was getting worse.
His looked up, staring at the back of Kurt's head. He hated having secrets, and he knew this wasn't one he could - or should - keep from his boyfriend.
He sighed, closing his book and pulling himself up straighter. "There's something I need to tell you."
"Sounds serious," Kurt said teasingly, his eyes still on his magazine and his ankles crossing playfully in the air behind him.
Blaine didn't smile, too busy thinking about how best to break the news. Total honesty was one of the best parts of their relationship, and this weight had been on his shoulders for too long now. He only hoped Kurt wouldn't be mad at him for waiting so long to bring it up.
"Um, I don't really know how to say this," he said, looking down at his hands. "But I've kind of suspected for a while- and- and she confirmed it - that Rachel, um...sort of has feelings for you."
Kurt inclined his head. "Well, it's not like it was hard to figure out," he said. His lip curled in mild distaste. "Her original song in glee club today was entitled 'My Big Closet of Love.' Subtlety has never been Rachel's strong suit."
Blaine felt as if a boulder had been lifted off of him, even as confusion settled in.
"Wait, you knew?"
The look of derision Kurt shot him would've hurt if not for the amusement in his eyes. "Of course I did."
Okay, so maybe their honesty wasn't as total as it could have been, but it still beat out most of the other relationships Blaine had seen. He shook his head.
"So, you mean I've been driving myself crazy trying to figure out how to break the news that Rachel Berry's in love with you, and you've known this whole time?"
"'Love' would imply it was about me." Kurt glanced back at him, unimpressed. "Make no mistake - this is about Rachel."
He was glad that the uncomfortable task of informing Kurt had been taken out of his hands, but something about Kurt's nonchalant attitude was putting Blaine on-edge. Why wasn't he upset about this? And why hadn't he said anything before now? Rachel had been trailing Kurt for almost two weeks.
"Doesn't it-" he said, his forehead creased, "doesn't it bother you at all?"
His boyfriend shrugged. "When you've known Rachel as long as I have, you get used to dealing with her tendency to jump into things. She came over last night and made dinner for me and my family, complete with a heart-healthy vegan lasagna for my dad. Finn spent the entire meal glaring at me like I'd stolen his X-Box. I think the only reason Carole let her in the house is because she was hoping to drive a wedge between Finn and Quinn."
So that was why Finn had been so short with Kurt lately. Blaine had been wondering if he'd accidentally walked in on them making out or something.
"Isn't going after another person's boyfriend a little...tactless?"
He hadn't wanted to say as much to Rachel, but her complete disregard for their relationship had been grating on him since their talk the day before.
"That never stopped her with Finn," Kurt said, not even bothering to look up from his magazine.
He frowned. "Shouldn't you do something to discourage her?"
"There's no stopping the Rachel Berry Crazy Train once it gets going," said Kurt, flipping to a new page. "The best you can do is ride it out until it finds its way back to the station."
Blaine narrowed his eyes, suspicious. "You're just enjoying all of the makeovers," he accused.
"In the last two weeks, she's let me throw out all of her clothes, redecorate her bedroom, and get rid of every one of her tacky locker decorations," Kurt hummed happily, not even trying to deny it. "If this keeps up, I might be able to obtain full creative control over her life."
Kurt sounded a bit too invested in that possibility, but Blaine was sure Rachel wouldn't go as far as to let him have that much influence over her. Well, he was pretty sure.
Sensing his unease, Kurt smiled reassuringly.
"Sometimes she gets an idea in her head, and there's not much you can do about it," he explained. "But it's harmless. I'm not going to run off and have tiny diva babies with Rachel, if that's what you're worried about," he tittered, absently crossing his ankles in the air again.
Blaine shifted awkwardly, causing Kurt to look up.
"Oh my god, that is what you're worried about!" he said, looking horrified.
He shrugged, feeling uncomfortable. This was the topic he'd been trying to avoid for the past two days. "I'm hardly the person to judge when it comes to confusing feelings."
Kurt sat up, a crease between his eyebrows. "I'm not confused about who I am, Blaine. And I've already been there done that with Brittany."
Right. He'd heard all about Kurt's brief-but-memorable brush with flannel. At the time, he'd thought it was sort of funny. But the situation with Rachel was different.
"Brittany's not really your type."
"Athletic and endearingly clueless?" Kurt said, turning around on the bed to face him. "Actually, she kind of is."
Blaine laughed in spite of himself. "Hey," he said, smacking Kurt playfully on the leg. It all sounded kind of stupid now that he was saying it out loud, but he knew he'd feel better once it was all out in the open. "I'm just saying, you and Rachel have a lot in common. Actually, so do I. You realise if you and I had kids, they'd probably turn out like Rachel?"
Kurt scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous. Our kids will be fabulous, and much better dressed."
He knew Kurt was joking, but the idea that he had fantasized about their future offspring made something warm pulse inside Blaine's chest. They hadn't even exchanged 'I love you's yet, but Blaine had never felt like this about anyone before. He really hoped he wasn't alone in that arena.
Quietly, he set his book aside and stretched himself out on the bed, taking Kurt's hand. After a moment, Kurt laid down beside him.
"You don't need to worry," Kurt said, his head turned toward him. "Short of Taylor Lautner showing up shirtless at McKinley on Monday, there's no one else I'm interested in dating."
"I know," said Blaine, his thumb gently stroking Kurt's hand, part of him already tensing for the shadow of Burt Hummel to appear in the doorway. He'd known the twinge of jealousy he'd been feeling was irrational (though, he couldn't deny the tiny part of him that was relieved to hear Kurt confirm it out loud). Just because Rachel and Kurt were weirdly perfect for one another didn't mean anything would happen.
He was just being silly.
Blaine smiled to himself as they laid there, Kurt humming the opening bars of Lady Gaga's latest chart-topper. His curfew wasn't for another hour. He could finish his homework in the morning.
*
The auditorium was softly lit, the atmosphere warm and intimate. Rachel had finally managed to book a time with Kurt to rehearse their duet, taking pains to ensure that it would just be the two of them.
Across from her on the stage, Kurt's deep timbre rang out, his eyes never once darting to the sheet music in his hand. He'd obviously prepared ahead of time, which meant that their duet had been on his mind.
He sounded good - almost as good as she did. It was like he was singing directly to her soul.
Rachel stared into his eyes as he sang, feeling just like Maria and Tony. It was all so romantic - she hadn't even had to bring along a picnic lunch.
Taking a step forward, Rachel's voice joined Kurt's as they reached the final verse. She bet his skin was even softer than it looked. She knew from discussions with Finn that Kurt was very particular about his night-time skin ritual. That kind of care and dedication to personal hygiene was very appealing in a romantic partner.
She reached out, lacing Kurt's fingers in hers as they sang.
"Hold my hand, and we're halfway there. Hold my hand and I'll take you there."
They were singing right to one another now, barely a foot of space between them. She pulled his hand to her chest, clasped between hers, and Kurt gave her an odd look. He must have felt the romantic tension building as well.
"Somehow! Some day! Somewhere!"
They were both breathing hard as they finished, their faces just inches apart. If her life were a musical, this was the part where the orchestra would swell, the audience holding its breath as the dashing leading man and beautiful young ingénue realised they could deny their feelings no longer.
She closed her eyes and pushed up on her toes, pressing her lips against his. His were soft - much softer than Finn's - and she smiled a bit against them, bracing herself for Kurt to sweep her up into his arms.
She felt his hands wrap around her biceps and promptly move her back.
"Okay, I'm going to stop you right there."
Kurt levelled her with an unimpressed gaze. "Rachel, what are you doing?"
Momentarily thrown, she laughed shyly. "I thought it would be pretty obvious," she said, looking hopeful.
"I'm gay, Rachel," Kurt said. "You know I'm gay. Why are you doing this to yourself?"
Rachel felt a shock of disappointment as she shook her head. This wasn't how it was supposed to go.
"We're great together," she said, trying to make him understand. "Our- our voices are perfect for one another, and we're both considerably more talented than our peers. Just think of all the amazing parts we could play."
She could picture it all perfectly - the eclectic little apartment they'd rent in New York, the stylish parties they'd attend, the beautiful daughter they'd have once she was twenty-six and well-established on the Broadway stage.
Kurt looked down at her with a mixture of pity and resignation.
"Just because you sing well with someone, doesn't mean you're soulmates," he said. "I've remained quiet until now, but this is a whole new level of crazy, even for you. In fact, I'd say hoping I'll just magically turn straight to fulfill your heteronormative Broadway fantasy borders on delusional."
Rachel's cheeks darkened as she looked away, hurt. "You're one to talk, after everything that happened with Finn," she said defensively.
Nodding to concede her point, Kurt said, "I think we both had our fair share of stupidity over that boy. Besides, as you so kindly pointed out, my gender ruled me out as a contender in that competition. Just like now."
The sharp sting of tears was building in her eyes, and she blinked, looking at her feet.
"This is different," she insisted quietly. "This is love."
Kurt sighed, trying to meet her eyes.
"You don't love me, Rachel," he said, not unkindly. "You love drama. I should know - I love drama, too.
"It's why you couldn't stop running after Finn. It's why you pursued Mr. Schuester even though he was married and has horrible taste in sweater vests. I suspect it's even why you fell for the lead singer of a rival show choir."
He gave her a pointed look. "And let's not forget - just a few short months ago, you convinced yourself you had feelings for Blaine - also gay - so you could write a song about rejection."
Rachel shook her head as he spoke. "This is more than that," she said, her eyes filling with tears. "We're perfect for one another - we're both passionate, and determined, and- and we both love singing more than anything. We fight a lot, but that's only because we're so alike!" she pleaded, trying to make him understand.
The pity was back in Kurt's eyes. "It doesn't work like that, Rachel."
She sniffled a bit - ordinarily, she could appreciate the artistic value of being faced with such an open dismissal, but at the moment, all she could focus on was the heartache.
"Look," said Kurt, "I know that we've had a bit of a rocky rivalry-turned-friendship, and I realise that - if viewed from a certain perspective - that could seem like the perfect set-up for a Hollywood rom-com starring Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant, but there's a key difference between those stories and this one: Hugh Grant didn't want to run off with Colin Firth." He paused, looking thoughtful. "Well, except maybe in the Bridget Jones sequel - there were some seriously heated looks during that fight scene."
She shook her head again. "But, you and I would be so compatible. I mean, we like the same movies and songs, we have the same hopes and dreams. No one else understands me like you do. I mean, where else am I going to find a guy who can appreciate Barbara and Patty like you?" She looked down, blinking away her tears. "Where am I going to find
someone who will put up with all of my crazy moments instead of just leaving me when I screw up?"
Kurt's expression softened. He sighed, reaching out to hold her hands in his. "Rachel, you are a smart, pretty, and extremely talented girl. And I know you're going to find someone - someone who will love you because of those moments, and not just in spite of them."
She shrugged her shoulder, unconvinced. "How do you know I'll ever find someone like that?" she asked quietly.
"Because I did," he said sincerely, the hint of an encouraging smile on his lips.
Rachel closed her eyes, still not quite persuaded. It was feeling increasingly unlikely - given her history - that she'd ever find someone like that. She wanted so badly to be loved, but in the end, they always found some reason to leave her. She'd never been good enough. What if she never was?
Appearing to read her thoughts, Kurt tilted her chin up.
"I have absolutely no doubt that you will one day find a man as - endearingly - insane and marvellous as you are. But I'm not him," he said, looking her straight in the eye as he wiped a tear off her cheek with a handkerchief. She could see the initials B.A. embroidered on one corner and felt a tiny stab of jealousy.
"And until that day comes," he continued, "you are far too much of a star to waste your time running after things you can't have."
She smiled reluctantly, ducking her head as he hooked her arm with his. It hurt, liking someone who couldn't like her back, but maybe Kurt had a point. After all, a year ago he'd been lonelier than her, and he'd still found love.
Besides, it would be nice to have her old clothes back again.
Kurt raised his eyebrows expectantly. Rachel gave a small nod, her eyes dry once more. Together, they walked arm-in-arm off the stage, her other hand lightly gripping the inside of his elbow.
"For what it's worth," Kurt said, leaning in close, "we would've ruled Broadway. But don't tell Blaine I said that."
Rachel laughed quietly, grateful that he seemed willing to move on.
"Are you sure you don't like girls even a little, teensy bit?" she asked, attempting a teasing tone.
"Afraid not," he said, his voice light as they made their way toward the exit. "It's the lipstick. It's just too messy for my liking."
He shot her an appraising look. "Though, for the record, your lip gloss tastes better than Brittany's does."
She shook her head, pushing the doors of the auditorium open, feeling a bit lighter than before. She still didn't have a boyfriend, but maybe she'd managed to find a true friend instead. That had to count for something. And all of this heartache was probably doing worlds for her song-writing abilities. Having a boyfriend could wait.
Arms still linked, they headed to the parking lot, plans for a Julie Andrews marathon at Kurt's house already underway.
Maybe Finn would be there.
The End.
Author: batgurl88
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 11,784
Pairings: Rachel/Kurt (onesided), Kurt/Blaine (established), past Rachel/Finn
Summary: Rachel falls in love with Kurt. Blaine and Finn aren't pleased. From a prompt on the Angst Meme.
A/N: Most of this was written before we started getting spoilers for S3, so ignore the fact that one of the songs ended up being used on the show. Set somewhere between 'Born This Way' and 'Prom Queen', so Rachel and Kurt's friendship is still in the middle of that awkward transition phase.
Major thanks to B for the beta and rec! Any additional mistakes are my own. And props to penelopesfriend for all the help/support.
Part One
-
The glee club was unruly as usual, Rachel's fellow teammates a loud and immature crowd with no appreciation for proper decorum. She herself sat attentive in the front row, steadfastly ignoring the odd looks Finn had been shooting her when he thought Quinn wasn't looking.
She hadn't been able to secure a seat next to Kurt - Tina and Mercedes had walked in alongside him, leaving her with little opportunity - so, instead she'd made sure to sit directly in his eyeline. He'd spend the whole glee practice unable to stop himself from noticing her.
It was a good thing she'd gone with the red-and-white printed dress that morning instead of the faux-ripped beige one - the giant bell-shaped hips would be sure to catch his eye where they hung out over her chair.
Even if it was really hard to sit without rolling off the side.
The last to enter, Mr. Schuester gave them all a big smile, setting down his messenger bag.
"You guys did a great job with the passion assignment," he said, stopping in the middle of the room. "But I really think we need to get back to our roots."
He clapped his hands, looking excited. "I know we had some issues the last time we tried West Side Story, but I think it has just the right blend of passion and romance for us."
Rachel bounced in her seat, the hoop of her dress adding an extra wobble to her enthusiasm. This was perfect - another chance for her to claim her rightful place as Maria. The daily notes she slipped under the door of Mr. Schuester's office must have finally paid off.
And she knew just who she wanted to play her Tony.
Mr. Schuester was still talking, handing out stacks of sheet music to everyone.
"The judges really seemed to like our romantic duets at past competitions, and I think this could be a great song for Nationals."
Rachel glanced down at the sheet she was handed, another rush of excitement going through her at seeing 'Somewhere' written at the top.
Immediately, she raised her hand and stood, cutting off whatever their teacher was saying.
"Mr. Schue, if I may," she said, smiling graciously to her fellow glee club members as she gained their attention. "I think Kurt and I would be perfect for this duet. Our voices blend like they were made for each other, and our natural chemistry while singing will be just what we need to win Nationals."
She could feel the others' eyes on her. They were probably wondering how she managed to come up with so many great ideas.
Mr. Schuester sighed.
"Rachel, we already talked about this at Sectionals. You and Finn can't always just-" he stopped, frowning. "Wait, you and Kurt?"
Her smile widened as he stared at her. This was a brilliant plan - singing this duet with Kurt at Nationals would require them to be around one another constantly. And once their overwhelming romantic tension was met with a dark auditorium and the power of Sondheim's lyrics, Kurt would have no choice but to succumb to his hidden feelings and admit they were soulmates.
Looking uncertain, Mr. Schuester turned his attention behind her. "Kurt?" he asked.
Kurt was obviously trying to contain his excitement, still sitting primly in his seat. His good posture was really quite admirable. "Far be it from me to refuse a solo. And West Side Story is a particular favourite of mine."
"O-okay, then," Mr. Schue nodded, trying to smile. "I guess we've got our two soloists."
Sitting back down again, Rachel nodded to herself. Everything was working out perfectly.
*
Taking a deep breath - which was harder than one might think, given the tight boning of her new black tulle dress - Rachel smiled at her reflection in her locker mirror. She grabbed a yellow star-shaped notepad off the top shelf (a gift from her dads after her eighth consecutive Junior Miss Ohio Tap Dance win) and flipped it open.
There, carefully written in rich blue ink, were the steps of her 'Get Kurt to Fall in Love With Me' plan, her smile growing with each check-mark. Finn often criticised her for being too goal-oriented, but Rachel knew that a healthy sense of accomplishment was not only important, but necessary for achieving true success in life. It may not have looked like it, but she was within days of having Kurt as her boyfriend.
Sure, Kurt was still somewhat hesitant toward her, but little by little she was wearing him down with compliments and her charismatic presence.
She shut her locker and began walking a bit unsteadily down the hall. The black studded lace-up ankle boots she'd let Kurt pick out for her were taller than she was used to, and the stiff fabric of her long-sleeve dress itched, but the way Kurt had glanced almost approvingly at her ensemble that morning had made it all worth it.
The makeover had gone a long way in softening Kurt up, but Rachel knew she'd require a secret weapon in order to seal the deal. If she wanted to get Kurt, then she needed advice from the only other person who'd done it.
"I need to speak with you."
Brittany frowned. "Are you the wicked witch? I don't have a dog for you to take, and Lord Tubbington hates long car rides."
Rachel faltered, looking down at her outfit uncertainly, but quickly regained her composure.
"While I normally pride myself on remaining above the common gossip that runs rampant in our school, there are some things one simply can't help but overhear, and it is my understanding that you and Kurt dated briefly last year."
"His face was soft like a bunny's," the other girl said vaguely. Rachel chose to take it as a confirmation. While she found conversations with Brittany a strange and uncomfortable experience, Rachel was confident that somewhere in her very odd ramblings lay the secret to winning Kurt's heart.
Preparing her notepad, her pen poised just above the paper, she smiled indulgently.
"How exactly did you get him to date you?"
Brittany tilted her head. "Well, I asked him if he wanted to tap this, because he reminded me of the big lumberjack from those paper towel commercials, and cleaning products are really hot."
Rachel furrowed her brow, writing 'Tap this?' in her perfect penmanship.
"I see," she said, reading the next question on her notepad. "And what sorts of activities did the two of you participate in together?"
"Sometimes we made out, but usually just when his dad was there," Brittany said, her face screwed up in thought. "Mostly we talked about My Little Pony and he did my nails. He helped me pick out a new raincoat for Lord Tubbington, because his old one didn't match his sunglasses."
Nodding her head, Rachel wrote furiously.
Possible Shared Activities:
- Couple's manicures
- Animal rights protest
- Exhibitionism?
Clearly she had her work cut out for her, but Rachel was positive that if Brittany could win Kurt over, she could as well.
"One last question," she said, smiling brightly. "What kind of kisser would you describe Kurt as - is he sweet and romantic, or does he have more of a passionate, take-charge style?"
While she was confident after dating Puck that she could make herself compatible with any type, it never hurt to be prepared, and knowing his style ahead of time would assist her in putting together an appropriate playlist of make-out songs.
"He kinda laid there like a hotdog without a bun," said Brittany, staring blankly into the distance. "But then we stopped making out because he started dressing like a Ken doll again, and Santana said that meant he was back to being gayer than Clay Aiken."
She stopped and turned to look at Rachel, her hands gripping the straps of her backpack. "You can tell Kurt if he wants to get back together, he's too late. I'm already dating Artie, and they have the same plumbing, so I can only sleep with one of them."
Rachel opened her mouth to reply, before realising she had nothing to say to that. She tilted her head in confusion, but Brittany was already leaving, the stuffed head of her unicorn backpack nodding in time as she walked.
*
Breadstix was fairly empty, that one older waitress who always seemed to be on-shift standing idly in the corner looking bored. She'd moved forward in interest when Rachel entered, but Rachel had waved her off, surveying the thin crowd. She quickly found what she was searching for.
Kurt and Blaine were seated across from each other, their heads bent forward over their clasped hands on the table, talking. The smiles on their faces were small, but familiar, both of them speaking too softly to hear.
"Hey, guys!" she said, sliding into the booth next to Kurt. "What are you up to?"
The two boys stared at her a moment before dropping their hands awkwardly and leaning back in their seats.
"Having dinner. Alone," Kurt said tersely. Their date must not have been going well.
Rachel smiled widely. "Great! I'm starving," she said, unbuttoning her red wool cape as she settled in comfortably next to him. The soft lighting really brought out his cheekbones.
Blaine shifted a bit in his seat.
"Don't you have dance practice right now, Rachel?"
"Yes," she said, pulling her cape off and laying it beside her, taking the opportunity to move that much closer to Kurt. She bet he was a great cuddler. He was taller than Blaine, but she was sure her head could rest comfortably on his shoulder without any unnecessary neck strain. Unlike with Finn.
She smiled again, directing her reply at Kurt. "Unfortunately our instructor has come down with a severe case of syphilis, so practices are cancelled until further notice. I offered to teach the class myself, but none of the other students were willing to concede to my leadership."
Although Rachel knew how important her dance classes were - a well-rounded portfolio would be her ticket to Julliard - Mr. Tische's bad luck actually worked in her favour. It allowed her further opportunity for her ongoing plan: be everywhere Kurt is. The more Kurt saw of her, the more he would think of her, making her too important to forget.
Soon enough, Kurt would come to anticipate her presence - even rely on and expect it.
She waved a hand in the air, flagging the waitress down.
"Anyway, with my whole evening wide open, I simply had to track Kurt down and tell him about this amazing new sheet music store I saw." She'd already special-ordered their matching copies of the complete Bye Bye Birdie soundtrack. She'd always thought she'd make a wonderful Kim MacAfee.
The waitress pulled out her pad and pen. "Can I get you something?"
Kurt and Blaine exchanged a look.
"Uh, Rachel-"
"Yes, I'll have a lemonade, and whatever Kurt's having as long as it's vegan," she answered, wrapping a hand around Kurt's arm in indication. Kurt gently removed it. He seemed very reluctant about public displays of affection. She'd have to work on that.
She turned back to the two boys as the waitress left, finding them both staring silently into space. Mentally, she checked another point off for herself - such deep-rooted communication problems were an obvious death knell for any relationship.
It was a good thing she'd turned up, or Kurt's night might have been awful.
*
Blaine rocked back on his heels, feeling a little out-of-place.
The front door of the Berry household was bright red, which made the part of Blaine that could easily spend most of the morning laughing at one of Jeff's terrible puns wonder if it had anything to do with their last name. The last time he'd been there, it'd been a lot darker, and he'd been distracted by those tight pants Kurt had been wearing - which sort of resembled bondage gear now that he thought about it - and worrying about making a good impression on his friends.
Now, though, standing alone on the welcome mat with its slightly disturbing big-eyed cat grinning up at him, he found himself wondering whether Rachel's dads had chosen the colour because they thought it was funny or simply because it was attention-grabbing.
Finally, the door opened to reveal Rachel. She was dressed in an off-white wrap he was pretty sure he'd seen Kate Middleton wearing to a museum opening last month (Blaine was still really amazed Kurt had managed to find so many high-fashion clothes for her in Lima, but then again, Kurt had a knack for doing the impossible).
She stiffened as she caught sight of him, her eyes widening a bit beneath the long red feathers of her ornate fascinator hat.
"Oh, hello, Blaine."
He smiled politely. "Hey, Rachel. Is it all right if I talk to you for a minute?"
She tilted her head to the side. "Of course," she said after a moment, beckoning him into her home with a sweep of her arm. He kind of liked that about Rachel - everything was like an old-fashioned movie with her.
The inside of the Berry household was as immaculate as the outside. He hadn't caught more than a glance at the upstairs the last time he'd been there because Rachel had been adamant about not leaving Puck alone in the basement too long without her supervision. Now, though, he could see pictures of her everywhere as they walked into the living room, only to be met with an ornate trophy case displaying several pairs of bronzed ballet shoes and more trophies than a Toddlers and Tiaras pageant.
"Um, that's quite the collection," he commented awkwardly, realising he'd been staring. It'd probably seemed impolite.
Rachel thanked him with a smile. "It's just a small portion of the honours I've received - my dads are in the process of redoing the spare bedroom to turn it into an appropriate show room for my awards. They want to ensure my entire career is properly documented for when I achieve worldwide fame."
Blaine had no idea what to say to that, except that it was comments like that that made him remember why Rachel was the way she was, so instead he settled for what he hoped was a supportive smile.
She gestured to a striped couch in front of the living room window, taking a seat herself in the chair directly across from it. Blaine sat, doing his best to ignore his surroundings.
Rachel shifted in her seat, a reluctant and falsely-detached expression on her face. "Not to be rude, but I have a meeting with the Black Student Union in half-an-hour and we're going to be voting on my suggestion for a musical re-telling of the Harriet Tubman story for next month's fundraiser."
Clasping his hands in front of him, Blaine organised his thoughts. He'd decided ahead of time that the best tactic was to be honest, and to approach the issue rationally.
"Kurt doesn't know I'm here," he said up front. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel embarrassed at the thought of them talking about her behind her back.
At Rachel's nod, he continued.
"You know Kurt and I don't get to spend as much time together as we used to since he transferred," he said, leaning forward to rest his forearms on his knees.
A smug look crossed Rachel's face, though she tried to hide it. "Long-distance relationships are generally unsuccessful in people our age," she said, overly-earnest. "I know from experience. Maybe you and Kurt should consider whether you're truly ready to tie yourselves to a relationship that might be doomed to failure."
He felt a surprising twinge of resentment at the dig about their relationship - the distance between them was a bit of a sore spot for him - but Blaine ignored it. Rachel was only lashing out due to her own insecurities.
"Regardless of that, we still enjoy spending time together," he said evenly, looking her in the eye. "And while I'd never suggest that you and Kurt should see less of each other, I can't help but notice that you've shown up on every one of our dates this week. And that's not really fair to Kurt and I."
Rachel was sitting ramrod-straight in her chair, her eyes guarded. "Kurt enjoys spending time with me." Blaine thought that might be stretching the truth a little bit, but it wasn't his place to comment. "You can't decide who he is and isn't friends with. There are pamphlets on things like that."
He held up his hands defensively. "Believe me, I have no intention of telling Kurt who he can be friends with. I just think it's a little inconsiderate of you to keep inviting yourself along on our dates when Kurt and I get to spend so little time together as it is. And, frankly, Rachel, your behaviour lately has been a little-" he winced, searching for the right word- "Inappropriate."
She huffed. "I don't know what you're talking about."
He scratched the back of his neck. He hadn't meant to bring it up so bluntly, but he knew it needed to be said. "Look, don't take this the wrong way, but it's been pretty obvious that you've developed...feelings for Kurt."
Rachel's cheeks reddened slightly, but her expression quickly turned defensive. "I don't see why that should bother you," she said.
Blaine sighed. "You know how girls sometimes say all of the best guys are either gay or taken?" he asked, waiting for a nod from Rachel before he continued. "Well, Kurt's both."
Rachel frowned.
"How do you know?" she asked. "Everyone always just assumed he was gay, but maybe he didn't get a chance to consider whether he likes girls. Or maybe he's bi. You can't say for sure."
Wincing a bit, Blaine sat back. Another sore spot - Rachel seemed to have a knack for finding them. "Would you say that to your dads, Rachel?"
She shrugged, a carefully unaffected look on her face. "That's different - they're both a lot older than Kurt. This is the time in our lives when we're supposed to be figuring these sorts of things out. For all we know, I could be doing Kurt a favour."
In general, Blaine liked Rachel, but it was moments like this one where he really understood Kurt's constant frustration with her.
He glanced to the side, considering a different approach.
"Look, I'd like to think the two of us are friends now, right?" he said, raising his eyebrows entreatingly.
She considered it for a moment before nodding her agreement.
"Well, then," he said slowly, working through the wording, "as your friend, I don't want to see you get hurt by falling for someone who can't return your feelings. I think you're just setting yourself up for disappointment."
Rachel was silent, hurt flashing briefly in her eyes before a look of hard determination settled on her features.
"I'm sorry that you're jealous of what Kurt and I share," she said quietly, her voice like steel. "But you need to accept that you may not be the best thing for him."
She tilted her head in a manner she probably thought exuded sympathy. "You're a good showman, Blaine, and admittedly quite attractive, but I'm a vastly superior singer and Kurt and I share a much longer history. I only hope there will be no hard feelings between us when Kurt chooses our Broadway-destined romance over you."
The twinge of irritation Blaine had felt earlier returned.
"Rachel, this isn't like when you and I went on that date. Kurt isn't questioning himself - he's gay."
She shook her head.
"You don't know every thought that goes through Kurt's mind. How do you know for sure he isn't interested?"
Blaine bit the inside of his cheek, feeling like he was in a punching match against a brick wall. "Fair enough," he conceded. "I don't. But even if Kurt were bi, we're still dating. And frankly, your behaviour has been bordering on rude."
He met her gaze head-on, his expression softening. "I mean, how would you feel if I acted like that to someone you were seeing?"
He was aware he was pleading, but he really wasn't sure how else to appeal to her. Rachel was used to viewing things only from her perspective, but maybe with a bit of prodding, she would see how her behaviour was affecting others.
For a second, he thought it might have worked, Rachel's gaze darting to the side uncertainly, her posture not as stiff. Her eyes were shining a bit as she turned back, but he was disappointed to see their sense of determination had not faded.
"I think if you're that insecure about your and Kurt's relationship, then maybe you should reconsider whether or not you're truly invested in it," she said shortly, the edges of her mouth pulled down in an unhappy line. "I'll stop showing up on your dates, but mostly because that much coffee consumption isn't good for my voice. You should both really think about finding another shared activity. But I'm not going to give up."
She stood, flicking a loose feather from her fascinator out of her eyes. "I assure you I won't hold any of this against you when Kurt and I are co-starring in this summer's community theatre production of Into the Woods. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to finish writing a song about abolitionism."
*
Blaine and Kurt were spread out on Kurt's bed, the door to his room open just past the acceptable limit. Blaine was propped up against the headboard, his chemistry textbook opened on his lap, while Kurt lounged on his stomach beside him reading a magazine. McKinley's schoolwork was a lot easier than Dalton's, and he always finished his before Blaine, but Kurt had still managed to convince his dad that they needed these nightly 'homework dates.'
Blaine didn't mind one bit. It was nice spending time with Kurt, and studying alone at Dalton just hadn't been the same since he left.
Today, though, his mind couldn't be further from his schoolwork, a gnawing feeling in the pit of his stomach. He'd re-read the same line five times already, and if anything, his focus was getting worse.
His looked up, staring at the back of Kurt's head. He hated having secrets, and he knew this wasn't one he could - or should - keep from his boyfriend.
He sighed, closing his book and pulling himself up straighter. "There's something I need to tell you."
"Sounds serious," Kurt said teasingly, his eyes still on his magazine and his ankles crossing playfully in the air behind him.
Blaine didn't smile, too busy thinking about how best to break the news. Total honesty was one of the best parts of their relationship, and this weight had been on his shoulders for too long now. He only hoped Kurt wouldn't be mad at him for waiting so long to bring it up.
"Um, I don't really know how to say this," he said, looking down at his hands. "But I've kind of suspected for a while- and- and she confirmed it - that Rachel, um...sort of has feelings for you."
Kurt inclined his head. "Well, it's not like it was hard to figure out," he said. His lip curled in mild distaste. "Her original song in glee club today was entitled 'My Big Closet of Love.' Subtlety has never been Rachel's strong suit."
Blaine felt as if a boulder had been lifted off of him, even as confusion settled in.
"Wait, you knew?"
The look of derision Kurt shot him would've hurt if not for the amusement in his eyes. "Of course I did."
Okay, so maybe their honesty wasn't as total as it could have been, but it still beat out most of the other relationships Blaine had seen. He shook his head.
"So, you mean I've been driving myself crazy trying to figure out how to break the news that Rachel Berry's in love with you, and you've known this whole time?"
"'Love' would imply it was about me." Kurt glanced back at him, unimpressed. "Make no mistake - this is about Rachel."
He was glad that the uncomfortable task of informing Kurt had been taken out of his hands, but something about Kurt's nonchalant attitude was putting Blaine on-edge. Why wasn't he upset about this? And why hadn't he said anything before now? Rachel had been trailing Kurt for almost two weeks.
"Doesn't it-" he said, his forehead creased, "doesn't it bother you at all?"
His boyfriend shrugged. "When you've known Rachel as long as I have, you get used to dealing with her tendency to jump into things. She came over last night and made dinner for me and my family, complete with a heart-healthy vegan lasagna for my dad. Finn spent the entire meal glaring at me like I'd stolen his X-Box. I think the only reason Carole let her in the house is because she was hoping to drive a wedge between Finn and Quinn."
So that was why Finn had been so short with Kurt lately. Blaine had been wondering if he'd accidentally walked in on them making out or something.
"Isn't going after another person's boyfriend a little...tactless?"
He hadn't wanted to say as much to Rachel, but her complete disregard for their relationship had been grating on him since their talk the day before.
"That never stopped her with Finn," Kurt said, not even bothering to look up from his magazine.
He frowned. "Shouldn't you do something to discourage her?"
"There's no stopping the Rachel Berry Crazy Train once it gets going," said Kurt, flipping to a new page. "The best you can do is ride it out until it finds its way back to the station."
Blaine narrowed his eyes, suspicious. "You're just enjoying all of the makeovers," he accused.
"In the last two weeks, she's let me throw out all of her clothes, redecorate her bedroom, and get rid of every one of her tacky locker decorations," Kurt hummed happily, not even trying to deny it. "If this keeps up, I might be able to obtain full creative control over her life."
Kurt sounded a bit too invested in that possibility, but Blaine was sure Rachel wouldn't go as far as to let him have that much influence over her. Well, he was pretty sure.
Sensing his unease, Kurt smiled reassuringly.
"Sometimes she gets an idea in her head, and there's not much you can do about it," he explained. "But it's harmless. I'm not going to run off and have tiny diva babies with Rachel, if that's what you're worried about," he tittered, absently crossing his ankles in the air again.
Blaine shifted awkwardly, causing Kurt to look up.
"Oh my god, that is what you're worried about!" he said, looking horrified.
He shrugged, feeling uncomfortable. This was the topic he'd been trying to avoid for the past two days. "I'm hardly the person to judge when it comes to confusing feelings."
Kurt sat up, a crease between his eyebrows. "I'm not confused about who I am, Blaine. And I've already been there done that with Brittany."
Right. He'd heard all about Kurt's brief-but-memorable brush with flannel. At the time, he'd thought it was sort of funny. But the situation with Rachel was different.
"Brittany's not really your type."
"Athletic and endearingly clueless?" Kurt said, turning around on the bed to face him. "Actually, she kind of is."
Blaine laughed in spite of himself. "Hey," he said, smacking Kurt playfully on the leg. It all sounded kind of stupid now that he was saying it out loud, but he knew he'd feel better once it was all out in the open. "I'm just saying, you and Rachel have a lot in common. Actually, so do I. You realise if you and I had kids, they'd probably turn out like Rachel?"
Kurt scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous. Our kids will be fabulous, and much better dressed."
He knew Kurt was joking, but the idea that he had fantasized about their future offspring made something warm pulse inside Blaine's chest. They hadn't even exchanged 'I love you's yet, but Blaine had never felt like this about anyone before. He really hoped he wasn't alone in that arena.
Quietly, he set his book aside and stretched himself out on the bed, taking Kurt's hand. After a moment, Kurt laid down beside him.
"You don't need to worry," Kurt said, his head turned toward him. "Short of Taylor Lautner showing up shirtless at McKinley on Monday, there's no one else I'm interested in dating."
"I know," said Blaine, his thumb gently stroking Kurt's hand, part of him already tensing for the shadow of Burt Hummel to appear in the doorway. He'd known the twinge of jealousy he'd been feeling was irrational (though, he couldn't deny the tiny part of him that was relieved to hear Kurt confirm it out loud). Just because Rachel and Kurt were weirdly perfect for one another didn't mean anything would happen.
He was just being silly.
Blaine smiled to himself as they laid there, Kurt humming the opening bars of Lady Gaga's latest chart-topper. His curfew wasn't for another hour. He could finish his homework in the morning.
*
The auditorium was softly lit, the atmosphere warm and intimate. Rachel had finally managed to book a time with Kurt to rehearse their duet, taking pains to ensure that it would just be the two of them.
Across from her on the stage, Kurt's deep timbre rang out, his eyes never once darting to the sheet music in his hand. He'd obviously prepared ahead of time, which meant that their duet had been on his mind.
He sounded good - almost as good as she did. It was like he was singing directly to her soul.
Rachel stared into his eyes as he sang, feeling just like Maria and Tony. It was all so romantic - she hadn't even had to bring along a picnic lunch.
Taking a step forward, Rachel's voice joined Kurt's as they reached the final verse. She bet his skin was even softer than it looked. She knew from discussions with Finn that Kurt was very particular about his night-time skin ritual. That kind of care and dedication to personal hygiene was very appealing in a romantic partner.
She reached out, lacing Kurt's fingers in hers as they sang.
"Hold my hand, and we're halfway there. Hold my hand and I'll take you there."
They were singing right to one another now, barely a foot of space between them. She pulled his hand to her chest, clasped between hers, and Kurt gave her an odd look. He must have felt the romantic tension building as well.
"Somehow! Some day! Somewhere!"
They were both breathing hard as they finished, their faces just inches apart. If her life were a musical, this was the part where the orchestra would swell, the audience holding its breath as the dashing leading man and beautiful young ingénue realised they could deny their feelings no longer.
She closed her eyes and pushed up on her toes, pressing her lips against his. His were soft - much softer than Finn's - and she smiled a bit against them, bracing herself for Kurt to sweep her up into his arms.
She felt his hands wrap around her biceps and promptly move her back.
"Okay, I'm going to stop you right there."
Kurt levelled her with an unimpressed gaze. "Rachel, what are you doing?"
Momentarily thrown, she laughed shyly. "I thought it would be pretty obvious," she said, looking hopeful.
"I'm gay, Rachel," Kurt said. "You know I'm gay. Why are you doing this to yourself?"
Rachel felt a shock of disappointment as she shook her head. This wasn't how it was supposed to go.
"We're great together," she said, trying to make him understand. "Our- our voices are perfect for one another, and we're both considerably more talented than our peers. Just think of all the amazing parts we could play."
She could picture it all perfectly - the eclectic little apartment they'd rent in New York, the stylish parties they'd attend, the beautiful daughter they'd have once she was twenty-six and well-established on the Broadway stage.
Kurt looked down at her with a mixture of pity and resignation.
"Just because you sing well with someone, doesn't mean you're soulmates," he said. "I've remained quiet until now, but this is a whole new level of crazy, even for you. In fact, I'd say hoping I'll just magically turn straight to fulfill your heteronormative Broadway fantasy borders on delusional."
Rachel's cheeks darkened as she looked away, hurt. "You're one to talk, after everything that happened with Finn," she said defensively.
Nodding to concede her point, Kurt said, "I think we both had our fair share of stupidity over that boy. Besides, as you so kindly pointed out, my gender ruled me out as a contender in that competition. Just like now."
The sharp sting of tears was building in her eyes, and she blinked, looking at her feet.
"This is different," she insisted quietly. "This is love."
Kurt sighed, trying to meet her eyes.
"You don't love me, Rachel," he said, not unkindly. "You love drama. I should know - I love drama, too.
"It's why you couldn't stop running after Finn. It's why you pursued Mr. Schuester even though he was married and has horrible taste in sweater vests. I suspect it's even why you fell for the lead singer of a rival show choir."
He gave her a pointed look. "And let's not forget - just a few short months ago, you convinced yourself you had feelings for Blaine - also gay - so you could write a song about rejection."
Rachel shook her head as he spoke. "This is more than that," she said, her eyes filling with tears. "We're perfect for one another - we're both passionate, and determined, and- and we both love singing more than anything. We fight a lot, but that's only because we're so alike!" she pleaded, trying to make him understand.
The pity was back in Kurt's eyes. "It doesn't work like that, Rachel."
She sniffled a bit - ordinarily, she could appreciate the artistic value of being faced with such an open dismissal, but at the moment, all she could focus on was the heartache.
"Look," said Kurt, "I know that we've had a bit of a rocky rivalry-turned-friendship, and I realise that - if viewed from a certain perspective - that could seem like the perfect set-up for a Hollywood rom-com starring Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant, but there's a key difference between those stories and this one: Hugh Grant didn't want to run off with Colin Firth." He paused, looking thoughtful. "Well, except maybe in the Bridget Jones sequel - there were some seriously heated looks during that fight scene."
She shook her head again. "But, you and I would be so compatible. I mean, we like the same movies and songs, we have the same hopes and dreams. No one else understands me like you do. I mean, where else am I going to find a guy who can appreciate Barbara and Patty like you?" She looked down, blinking away her tears. "Where am I going to find
someone who will put up with all of my crazy moments instead of just leaving me when I screw up?"
Kurt's expression softened. He sighed, reaching out to hold her hands in his. "Rachel, you are a smart, pretty, and extremely talented girl. And I know you're going to find someone - someone who will love you because of those moments, and not just in spite of them."
She shrugged her shoulder, unconvinced. "How do you know I'll ever find someone like that?" she asked quietly.
"Because I did," he said sincerely, the hint of an encouraging smile on his lips.
Rachel closed her eyes, still not quite persuaded. It was feeling increasingly unlikely - given her history - that she'd ever find someone like that. She wanted so badly to be loved, but in the end, they always found some reason to leave her. She'd never been good enough. What if she never was?
Appearing to read her thoughts, Kurt tilted her chin up.
"I have absolutely no doubt that you will one day find a man as - endearingly - insane and marvellous as you are. But I'm not him," he said, looking her straight in the eye as he wiped a tear off her cheek with a handkerchief. She could see the initials B.A. embroidered on one corner and felt a tiny stab of jealousy.
"And until that day comes," he continued, "you are far too much of a star to waste your time running after things you can't have."
She smiled reluctantly, ducking her head as he hooked her arm with his. It hurt, liking someone who couldn't like her back, but maybe Kurt had a point. After all, a year ago he'd been lonelier than her, and he'd still found love.
Besides, it would be nice to have her old clothes back again.
Kurt raised his eyebrows expectantly. Rachel gave a small nod, her eyes dry once more. Together, they walked arm-in-arm off the stage, her other hand lightly gripping the inside of his elbow.
"For what it's worth," Kurt said, leaning in close, "we would've ruled Broadway. But don't tell Blaine I said that."
Rachel laughed quietly, grateful that he seemed willing to move on.
"Are you sure you don't like girls even a little, teensy bit?" she asked, attempting a teasing tone.
"Afraid not," he said, his voice light as they made their way toward the exit. "It's the lipstick. It's just too messy for my liking."
He shot her an appraising look. "Though, for the record, your lip gloss tastes better than Brittany's does."
She shook her head, pushing the doors of the auditorium open, feeling a bit lighter than before. She still didn't have a boyfriend, but maybe she'd managed to find a true friend instead. That had to count for something. And all of this heartache was probably doing worlds for her song-writing abilities. Having a boyfriend could wait.
Arms still linked, they headed to the parking lot, plans for a Julie Andrews marathon at Kurt's house already underway.
Maybe Finn would be there.
The End.