When the Subconscious Has a Mind of Its Own
Title: When the Subconscious Has a Mind of Its Own
Author: bballgirl3022
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Dean/Castiel
Spoilers: If you know Castiel then you’re good. General stuff from season 5.
Warnings: Bonding fic
Disclaimer: I don’t own Supernatural.
Summary: Dean’s hurt and Castiel fixes him, only to create an even larger mess of Dean’s life.
Word Count: 1,353
Notes: This was actually the first Supernatural fic I attempted to write, but I never finished. And now here’s the first chapter. Thank you and enjoy
No beta… Sorry.
Dean and Castiel had ‘bonded’. Castiel’s word not Dean’s. Dean wasn’t even aware it had happen. But it did and now he was attached to an angel in an intimate manner that he wasn’t sure he was capable of handling. He didn’t want this. At least he was pretty sure he didn’t. Yeah, he most likely did not want this to happen. But it did and there’s no going back now.
*****
It happened in a crappy motel room, like most major events in the Winchester’s lives. Their latest hunt had just ended. Dean was injured and stubbornly refusing Castiel’s offer to heal him. Something about it being unnatural and quite possibly inappropriate. Sam took Castiel’s side in this argument and yet it had no sway over Dean’s decision. Not that anyone really thought that it would. But if Sam did have any say he wouldn’t be watching his brother bleed to death in the backseat of the Impala. That was quite frankly not on his list of things to do today.
They’d almost made it to the motel when Dean’s blood loss started to affect his consciousness. Or rather he was unconscious at the moment and this made it all the more easy for Castiel to just go ahead and use his angel mojo to knit Dean back together. So Castiel dropped Dean, rather unceremoniously, on the bed closest to the door and went to work. He placed his hand on Dean’s chest and allowed his Grace to flow through into the still unconscious man. Dean had sucked in a breath at the surge of power rushing through his system, but his breathing returned to the deep, steady breaths of sleep as Castiel removed his Grace.
Castiel smiled; satisfied at a job well done. Sam finally emerged from the bathroom devoid of blood and alerted Castiel he was off on a ‘food run’ and would return eventually. Castiel was more than happy to stay and watch Dean sleep and make sure he was sufficiently healed. He allowed himself one moment of weakness and ran his fingers through Dean’s messy hair, like he’d seen humans do to show affection to those they care about. He retracted his hand from the hunter’s head, but before he got very far Dean had yanked him down in a crushing embrace.
To say Castiel was shocked would be an understatement. His attempts to remove himself from Dean’s grip were half-hearted at best. Truth be told, he’d wanted this closeness for a very long time and he was going to relish in the feeling as long he could.
Castiel allowed himself to relax into Dean’s embrace. He enjoys feeling Dean’s warmth surround him and sighs contently. This happy moment is soon interrupted with another possessive tug on Dean’s part. It isn’t a physical tug, but a tug on Castiel’s own Grace. Dean’s soul was attempting to drag Castiel’s Grace closer and make a claim on the angel. Castiel panicked. Surely Dean was unaware of what was happening. There was no way Dean could understand what bonding would entail. Castiel had wanted this very thing to happen on occasion and considered about asking the hunter if he would consent to such a thing; but he rejected the idea as quick as it came knowing full well that Dean would laugh at his suggestion and very likely make some crude joke or other at Castiel’s expense.
This whole situation was going to end badly. Castiel would never consider bonding with Dean’s without his consent. It would be inconsiderate. No matter how badly the angel wanted to allow the current process to continue. So he did the only logical thing he could think of. He fought against Dean’s death grip on his Grace. But Dean’s soul would not be deterred. It clutched tighter to his Grace, and in turn Castiel had to work harder. At this point in time Dean had started to make pitiful whimpers in his sleep that Castiel was sure he would never admit to making in any conscious state. The harder Castiel fought the more pitiful the noises Dean made.
This battle of wills continued until Castiel couldn’t stand it any longer; leaving Castiel with only one option. To give in and let Dean’s soul claim him.
*****
The first thing Dean noticed upon waking was the intense heat pressed up against him. The second thing he noticed was the intense heat was coming from a body wrapped in his arms, which was funny because he didn’t remember bringing anyone back to the hotel with him last night; in fact he didn’t even remember making it to the hotel. The third thing he noticed was that this body was still clothed, and while that made him feel a little better, it was also kind of disappointing. The last thing he noticed was that the clothed body pressed against him was distinctly male. This last thought was the one that had Dean sitting up so fast you’d think he’d been electrocuted. He scrambled off the bed and to his feet, the shocked expression never once leaving his face.
What he noticed next was enough to increase his already intense level of shock. Because the warm male body that he was previously sharing a bed with belonged to none other than Castiel. The angel extraordinaire himself. In the flesh, or vessel rather, whatever.
Once Dean’s panic resided a bit he was able to choke out “Uh…Cas?”
“Yes, Dean?” And damn him for sounding so calm when Dean’s world was turn upside down.
“There any reason you were in my bed? While I was still in it?”
“Yes.”
Dean had forgotten how difficult it is to get a straight answer out of angels. “Care to share with the class?”
Cas’s brow furrowed. Dean could swear he look worried for a second, but it passed before he could take the time to process the emotion. Then a wave of panic passed over him that he was pretty sure didn’t belong to him. Was he feeling other people’s emotions? Was he feeling Cas’s emotions? God, that was going to be awkward if it didn’t go away soon.
“Cas… What happened after the hunt last night?” Cas gets a shifty eye look he usually makes before he’s about to disappear unexpectedly. “Oh no you don’t,” Dean grabs Castiel’s elbow so he can’t flap away and feel a huge rush of heat over take him; but he’s determined to ignore that until he gets some answers.
“You were injured and unconscious. I healed you.” He avoids Dean’s gaze and that in itself is a dead giveaway that Castiel is avoiding mentioning something important.
“Cas! You’re not telling me something and I demand to know what it is!” Castiel’s head pops up so fast Dean almost gets whiplash just watching the guy. There’s a spark in his eyes that reminds Dean he is dealing with an angel who could crush him with just a thought.
“You demand to know! You don’t have any right to demand anything from me!” The heat Dean felt before intensifies drastically from the point where they’re touching.
“Whoa. Hey, calm down. Let’s not accidently smite someone.” He grasps Castiel’s shoulder in a manly attempt at offering comfort. Dean’s voice drops in volume, “I’m just trying to get all the facts here.”
Castiel has always been a flight risk. He’s prone to leave when things are over or emotions are being talked about. Dean feels bad for the guy. He died twice and was brought back. He had to deal with becoming human, even if it was only a short while.
“You’re right Dean. Something did happen. I couldn’t help it. I tried to fight, but it was just hurting you. I didn’t want to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you.” Castiel is distraught; Dean can feel it. This whole situation is a mess. “I did something horrible.”
“Cas, you gotta calm down man. Just tell me what happened so we can fix it.”
There is a sadness in Castiel’s eyes that makes Dean’s heart ache. “We bonded Dean.”
TBC