Lord Help Us, it's RtA Fanfic!

[beatrice_rta]

Trapped TogetherIt was perfect sunny day. Leaving behind husband and child, Mary Sue had been magically transported through shadow itself, and realizing only after she arrived that she'd forgotten her shoes. The Prince of the Hunt who welcomed her helped her out of a thicket of brambles, but not before it had taken half her skirt with it. It was

Comments

[quina_rta]

I'm going to hurt you, Bea.

And technically, the husband left first. ;-)

[adellaine]

Your Wesley will always come for you.

[lucius_r2a]

Hold on, now, where do I fit into all of this?

Wait. Scratch that.

I don't think I want to know.

[quina_rta]

I'm just glad she specified PG-13, since I can shift into a horse...

[niklas_rta]

Whoa...

[quina_rta]

Pull my reins when you say that, Nik.

[dirk_rta]

I want more please!

[beatrice_rta]

Write it! This is meant to be a group effort!

[benedict_rta]

No, he meant more in a different sense. He wants to join the party.

But I am not writing it. Not if there isn't a chorus of sailors.

[dirk_rta]

I am good for ideas. You should have a Prince of Tea written into the story. RL intrudes with the presence of a 5 page paper due tommorow that I can't put off anymore. I am sure Malachi and I could be a tiny chorus of sailors for you.

[liam_rta]

... and suddenly the forest was alive with the sounds of monkeys! Thousands of monkeys carrying knife-laden attack coconuts! The screetching and yelling and presenting of the bright red behinds filled the air. The Prince of Knives set his hands upon his hips and threw back his head and laughed -- yes laughed! Laughed maniacally! Because monkeys are funny!

"Oh save me!" Mary Sue said as she clutched to the Prince of the Hunt's bright white armor. "Save me from the monkey horrors!" She threw back her head and pressed her hand to her forehead.

The Prince of the Hunt kept one arm around Mary Sue and drew his gleaming white blade with the other. "Your feeble monkeys bring me no fear Prince of Knives," he said. And with that he cut down a coconut as it hurtled through the air at his head. "I will destroy your monkey horde and then I will destroy you!"

(OOC: Sadly, all I can picture are monkeys.)

[liam_rta]

One cannot have a good adventure/save the girl story without hordes of monkeys. It is a cosmic rule.

[fiamme_rta]

The monkeys are, in fact, completely necessary, you are right. And inevitable, somehow.

[adellaine]

"Oh, my," said Mary Sue, as she inhaled his manly fragrance. Then, because of what and who she was, she couldn't help adding, "I see you're holding your blade in the Monvalen style. While that works exceptionally well against coconuts, I think you'll find the Mangavin style is an excellent balance between coconut defense and monkey cleaving." She peered. "And you're using a white sword after Labor Day. Don't you have anything in chrome?"

[beatrice_rta]

I cannot see Quina delivering these lines with a straight face, alas.

[adellaine]

They do, however, fit the Mary Sue mold!

[fiamme_rta]

The Prince of the Hunt looked coldly down at Mary Sue, "The option remains. Useful, or scarce: decide." Then, white sword gleaming in defiance of fashion's dictates, he laid about him, halving monkeys and coconuts with equal efficiency.

The other Prince, meanwhile, had drawn his eponymous blade -- and was fighting off the coconut-flinging menaces. Being brothers, there was little to do but to engage in a competition over it.

Mary Sue was forced to decide her strategy to defend herself. Hand to hand? Or hand to hoof?