(Untitled)

[ex_stdymphna813]

the road

Comments

[gelasia]

*snap snap snap*

i dig this...

[ex_stdymphna813]

thanks very much!

[orchid_dealer]

up until the last stanza/segment i really liked this. the end had too much airy feeling or something, but the beginning made me sad in the way that really moving things would make someone sad.

all our heroes are scum, but man, they said such beautiful things.

[ex_stdymphna813]

yeah maybe the last part is a seperate poem. i am so bad at endings. thanks for commenting.

[cruxcharisma]

i concur. wasn't as moved by the ending, but the rest was fantastic.

[ex_stdymphna813]

hi, thanks so much for commenting. It has been awhile since I looked at this. It is one of those poems that just sits there for a long time waiting to be resolved. I think I need to take off the ending maybe, develop that somehow if I want to keep it, into something else and work on a good spot in the first part, to end it somehow. hmm. Thanks for helping me look at this again. Peace.

[crazy_dumbsaint]

ooh, I like this. so matter-of-fact :)

[ex_stdymphna813]

thanks very much.

[crazy_dumbsaint]

I was going to say more, about the Kerouac stanza, but I'm at work and my brain is fried. :)

[ex_stdymphna813]

ah well sorry, i hope you get a break soon.