Chuck Versus The Fan - Chuck Versus The Wookie
In case you missed 'em, here's my review for Tango and here's Helicopter. Which means it's time for...
Click small pics for bigger versions
All pictures are snaggable, just comment and credit
Comments are ♥
Chuck Versus the Wookie
The sound of laughter greets us as we begin this week’s episode. We find ourselves in Chuck’s apartment with Sarah, Morgan, Ellie, and Awesome. Apparently Chuck has to get his head in the game, ‘cause it’s comeback time. Ellie is holding a paddle to her chest as she asks Awesome how she likes her eggs. Ah, this is one of those “how well do you know me?” games. Awesome says “poached” and Ellie pees herself with happiness and they kiss.
Wow, they are so happy all the time
Chuck is eating pizza, snarking about the game and Morgan turns his paddle around to show what his answer was
XD!
They’re all happy and smiley though as Chuck rolls and begins to write his answer down. The question? His all-time favorite pet. Sarah thinks aloud while Morgan begins to scribble an answer of his own. She finally answers, “Peaches!” And Chuck slaps her five, all happy that she got it right. But in the normal way, not the, “Omg I love you so much, baby!” way.
But Morgan cuts the celebrating short with an obnoxious buzzer sound. He then proceeds to correct Sarah on both the type of dog and name. Even though Chuck had Peaches on his card…Turns out, it was actually Peaches 2, not to be confused with the original Peaches who got hit by a car. Chuck’s expression goes from “ugh” to “wait, what?” and Ellie quickly shuts Morgan up, saying to just give it to Sarah. And Morgan has a mini hissy fit.
Chuck reminds Ellie that she said the original Peaches ran away. And her reaction is priceless. But she sticks to her story as she shoots Morgan a glare. And Morgan just sips his beer XD Poor Chuck. It’s Morgan’s turn now: most humiliating childhood nickname. And then the camera cuts to outside the apartment and the music grows ominous and sneaky. Dun dun dunnnnn! They’re being watched! maybe it’s just Casey, seeing as he’s been a fucking creeper lately
But Chuck promised Morgan he’d never say the nickname out loud. Morgan signals him that it’s fine and Chuck answers…Organ. Just as I laugh and feel bad for the guy, he literally runs over to Awesome, Ellie, and Sarah, shoves the paddle in their faces and yells, “BOOM! ORGAN! ORGAN!” to show just how much he and Chuck know about each other. Sarah just smiles at Chuck knowingly as he slaps his little buddy an unenthusiastic high five.
Hmm, seems someone doesn’t like olives. Chuck watches as Sarah meticulously picks them off of her pizza as the game continues. Everyone’s having fun, the whole “Peaches Organ” incident long forgotten. It’s Sarah’s turn: most dangerous situation ever. Though, “maost daengerrous situehtion evehr” might be more appropriate. She’s a great actress but, seriously, she needs to work on her accent a little; she’s clearly an Aussie. Anyways.
Chuck’s mouth sort of curls up inside itself and he clears his throat rather loudly. He evens “ums” all shaky and nervous as he shoots Sarah an awesome look
Though in still form, he looks more annoyed than he does in the episode o_O
But she doesn’t give him any help. Everyone waits expectantly while he throws out a decent guess. Turns out, it was sunburn…? And I die laughing as Chuck mirrors my confusion. But Sarah elaborates. She was nine, on a family vacation, and she and her sister accidentally put on baby oil instead of sunscreen. We hear the ending of the story (they ended up looking like lobsters) through the peepers perspective from outside the window. As Sarah finishes, she shoots a glance toward said window and her demeanor changes a bit.
Chuck, still nomming on some pizza, pulls another card and his demeanor changes as well. He and Morgan exchange a look as he writes his answer down. The question? Most hated person ever. Awesome shouts out how easy it is while Sarah just looks around, confused. She looks to Chuck, but he’s got his eyes fixated on the table. Aw, Chuck. Sarah guesses Harry Tang and everyone chuckles about how wrong she is. Chuck brushes it off, saying it’s a stupid game and never mind.
But Morgan, being the man he is, grabs the paddle from Chuck and tells Sarah it’s Bryce Larkin, all “DUH” like. I mean, the man pretended to be Chuck’s buddy, sexed up his girl, and then got him kicked out of exoposition land. And then he throws out a reference I doubt Sarah gets, “If Chuck is Solo, Larkin is his Fett!” The mood grows noticeably awkward as Chuck tells Morgan that they get it; Sarah doesn’t get a point. And I see that Morgan has regressed back to the jealous sidekick again.
Sarah says goodnight to Ellie, she and Chuck holding hands, and Ellie closes the door, going back inside. And the second the door clicks shut, their hands fall back to their sides. Aw…that has to be so…just…tough. They banter about Morgan for a bit, saying he’s like the Intersect on Chuck (XD) as we see through Peepers perspective again, this time they’re above the cover couple.
As we come back to normal, camera perspective, Chuck muses that he wishes he could access Sarah’s file, learn more about her. But, of course, the Intersect doesn’t really work like that. She stops walking, saying Chuck could always just ask her. Which surprises him slightly, seeing as he goes into rabbit mode (he’s always so stuttery when he’s nervous). He asks her about Bryce. And her face…oh, Chuck. Sometimes you’re so blind.
He asks how close they were and she says they were partners but they were never really friends. And I get a giant whiff of will they/won’t they hijinks. Oh, Sarah. You clearly have feelings for the Nerd in front of you; otherwise you would not be lying about Bryce. Chuck is suddenly more confident; he’s clearly relieved as he makes a few witty remarks. And Sarah smiles ♥ but she changes to the subject to that of cover identities: you’re still you, but the details are different. Peeper is still watching them as they talk about how Morgan got more sexual questions right than Sarah did…wh...h'okay, then…Basically, Chuck wants to know their cover story for that particular topic. Sarah tells him that they’re taking it slow. But! What’s that! Someone’s coming! Oh, no!
Of course, it isn’t Peeper but…surprise…Morgan. He realizes, unconvincingly, out loud that Chuck meant he’d walk Sarah (I smell a New Jersey native, judging by the way he says “Sarah”. He says the “a” like in the word “cat”) to her car. Which makes sense, seeing as Morgan doesn’t have a car. As he walks by, he shoots Sarah the most annoyed, territorial glare I’ve ever seen.
Cut to Sarah in her hotel room. D’aw, she has a fish! I hate to break it to you, Sarah, but without something generating bubbles in that little bowl…little fishie don’t have much time to live…Anyway. She feeds her fish and we see that Peeper is now watching her.
Though, I suppose, who could blame them?
She goes to the bathroom and runs the water for a shower. But! She sees Peeper's reflection in the spout/knob. She tenses for a second but grabs a pair of tights and shoves a bar of soap inside. Quick thinking, Walker! She turns and swings, just missing Peeper. And the Asian-inspired fight music blares. They continue to fight and, judging by Peeper's voice as they get pummeled, I’m saying they’re a lady peeper.
Sarah runs out of the bathroom and grabs a gun from her purse but she’s too slow. Lady Peeper lands a kick, knocking the gun away. So Sarah grabs a giant vase and starts smashing the place up, trying to hit Lady Peeper. They accidentally knock Fishie over and we see more of Sarah than I’d ever care to (being interested in the boys) as she prepares to charge at Lady Peeper. They both tumble to the ground and Lady Peeper elbows Sarah in the face, knocking her gun away from her. She reaches for…
Guess which one
Survey says… she reached for the fish (Oh, yes, oh, yes, oh, yes, they both - oh, yes, they both, oh, yes, they both - reached for the fish, the fish, the fish)! She puts it back in the bowl and turns it upright, sparing its fishie little life. Sarah, now complete with bloody nose, looks pretty damn confused. So, she whips off Lady Peeper's mask. Apparently she knew it was this redheaded chick; Lady Peeper always telegraphs her punches. Whatever that means.
LP snarks that Sarah’s nose says otherwise. And they keep smiling at each like they were just “partners” too o__O Sarah asks what her cover is - Carina (not to be confused with insaneboingo). Carina asks the same and Sarah tells her. Carina asks, making sure to emphasize Sarah’s cover name, what brings the CIA to L.A. Why, it’s the same thing that brings a DEA agent like Carina (yay exposition! That’s only slightly soiled. Looooooove fooooor saaaaale. For some reason, this is a very musical portion of the recap forced): a job. And we see from both the way Carina greeted her friend and the way she goes on about how boring Sarah’s current assignment is, that she’s a feisty one who loves her job and all the dangerous perks that go with it. And I roll my eyes at how coincidental it is that Agent Feisty is a redhead.
But Sarah isn’t stupid; if Feisty’s here, it means she needs something. Turns out she does: a diamond. Sarah quips about marriage but Feisty clarifies as she offers Sarah a hand. She’s going to steal one. And Sarah is going to help her. Sarah slaps her hand away and stands up on her own before muttering a cheesy line, “Couldn’t you just have called?” And cue the Emmy nominated credits.
We come back to find Chuck on his way to work the next morning. He notices Feisty just standing in the courtyard and they exchange a smile as he walks by. Just as he walks away from her, a flash is triggered (and now it comes with snazzy cue music! It’s basically a man going “ahhhhhh” all operatically. Or it could be an instrument. Anyway.). He sees that Feisty was in Argentina and that she’s a D.E.A agent. And he looks pretty freaked out.
He looks back at her, which catches her attention, but he quickly scurries away. The second he opens the door to Casey’s apartment, Casey whips out his gun. So does Sarah, but she’s a little slower. As they put the weapons away, Chuck asks the pair if they were aware of the D.E.A. agent in the courtyard. And, of course, they are. Chuck has a little look around, standing next to his handlers and asks if he should leave. But Graham’s voice sounds from the computer; he can stay.
Chuck looks to Casey’s computer (nice DELL plug) and asks who he’s looking at. Casey snarks at him to shut up; they’re in the middle of being debriefed. Graham continues. Apparently the diamond is very well hidden inside Peyman Alahi’s Malibu compound (funny, in the picture it looks like a beach house). Chuck whispers another question and is quickly “shhh”ed by Casey. Alahi is a big opium guy, very bad stuff. It’s the reason why the DEA is involved in the first place. Beckman finally joins in, telling the team that they’ll assist Carina in acquiring the rock. I love that she says “acquiring” inside of stealing. Just as I smile to myself with that little thought, Chuck repeats, “’Acquiring?’” XD Yes! Casey, once again, shushes him. And this time Sarah looks at him, as well as Chuck.
XD
The team will need to take Chuck to the compound to get his “Intersect data”, as Graham puts it, on Alahi’s alarm system. They’ll make the actual grab the following day. But Sarah is concerned about Carina. While she’s a tremendous agent, she cannot be trusted and Chuck is far too valuable. And Graham starts spouting official stuff about Alahi’s plans, yada, yada, yada, when Casey, of all people, interrupts him. He’s had…dealings…with Carina as well; she can be a wild card. Oh, Casey, you horny bastard.
But Beckman and Graham are well aware of what went down in Prague (oh, see what I did there). Sarah and Chuck immediately smile like the 12-year old boys they are, and Graham orders the team to immediately give the diamond to the proper authorities, not Carina. Chuck’s voice jumps half an octave for a second as he asks Casey what happened in Prague. And the look Casey shoots him
XD
Chuck decides he doesn’t need to know. Outside, Sarah introduces Carina to the team. Carina comments how nice it is to see Casey with his pants on. Ugh. I’m all about strong, powerful women who aren’t afraid to be as sexual as men but, for some reason, this just feels so forced and cliché. Chuck and Casey, once again, exchange some awesome glances before Carina asks Chuck who he is. He’s straight back to rabbit mode as he stutters out his name. Apparently, he’s also the new guy. Sarah clarifies; he’s an analyst. Just when things can’t get any more awkward…Morgan stumbles into the courtyard. Sarah quickly informs Carina that Morgan is just a civilian and introduces him to Carina. And, being Morgan, he decides to do this
Oh, Morgan
Cut right to the Buy More where Morgan is telling the story to Jeff and Lester while Chuck watches in the background. She said it was a pleasure to meet him but her eyes said…everything. Chuck chimes in, “Like Martin.” Jeff and Lester look confused. Carina called Morgan “Martin.” Morgan is totally fine with it though as he starts to ramble but! Tang is on the way, no time for idle chatter.
Morgan scampers away but Jeff and Lester, being Nerds, stay at the Nerd Herd desk. And Lester…oh, man, I’m starting to notice your comedic value, buddy. He asks Chuck how he’s supposed to get any female friction action with Morgan third-wheeling him all the time. I. Love. This. Show. Chuck asks him what in the hell that means and now I’m doubled over laughing as Lester stammers out “…s-sex…”. And soon, I’m wiping away tears of joy and laughter as Chuck asks Lester why he can’t just say that. Well, Chuck, naturally, that lacks flavor.
Over at the Wienerlicious, Carina and Sarah are reviewing some junk for the mission while Carina thinks out loud. She knows why Casey is there but she can’t figure out why they need Chuck. She asks Sarah what Chuck is analyzing; her? And I roll my eyes and groan. Sarah reacts pretty much the same way, but she shares their cover story with her old frienemy. “Speaking of,” (one thing this episode is severely lacking so far is subtlety of any kind) Carina offers her condolences for Bryce. As Sarah starts to get sincere and emotional, Carina bluntly and callously reminds Sarah that “getting dead is an occupational hazard.” And I react almost exactly the way Sarah does.
Though in still-form, you can't really see her roll her eyes
Carina tries to get some info about the assignment out of Sarah but it’s top secret. So, she’ll just go talk to Chuck about it. But Sarah assures Carina that that’s not happening either. Too bad she’s halfway out of the store. I try not to groan as Sarah struggles to catch up to her. I mean, Carina is walking at slasher-movie villain speed, in giant high heels, and Sarah is wearing flats, taking quick, albeit short (to keep the distance) steps. I only point it out because it’s so obvious to anyone watching that Sarah should have no problem catching her. Anyway.
Just as Sarah makes it to the door, some guy, who works at the Wienerlicious all of the sudden, comes in, asking her where she thinks she’s going. You’d think the CIA would give her a job higher up than a civilian so she could do whatever she wanted. But then we wouldn’t have hijinks.
Carina stalks around the Buy More with Morgan watching her the entire time. That is, before he gets up the nerve to jump out at her and say hi. She looks at him like he’s insane and asks him if he works there. For a spy, she’s got a shit memory for faces, huh? Morgan deflates and says that, yes, he does. He reminds her that they met that morning at Chuck’s, even calling himself Martin. Her eyes light up and she asks where Chuck is. Morgan tries to play it cool as Jeff and Lester watch from the Nerd Herd desk. They go on and on about how she is too good for him (why? Because she’s tall and skinny?) and how she’s too good for the store. Isn’t there a nicer establishment where beautiful people can shop? XD Lester, you are amazing in this episode!
Chuck makes his way to his desk and Carina sees him and waves, a giant smile now on her face. Chuck waves back (and even mumbles “hi” XD). Morgan goes back over to the Nerds and demands that Chuck fix up him with Fiesty. But Chuck is hesitant. Meanwhile, Sarah has finally caught up and demands that Carina back off. Morgan gets defensive, assuming that Chuck doesn’t think he’s good enough for a girl like Carina (why?!). He then insults his friend by insisting that if he can get Sarah, anything is possible. Lester keeps interjecting and agreeing and it is hysterical. But Morgan just wants to spread his wings.
Like so
Chuck finally caves in, but he’s not making any promises! He interrupts the two bickering ladies to pull Sarah aside. He just wants to ask her a favor, and he keeps telling her to say “no” but really say “nooo”, when he asks for her to fix Morgan up with Carina. And as the pair looks to the bearded wonder, I can’t help but laugh. It’s Chuck’s face, me thinks.
As long as Sarah exaggerates “no” enough that Morgan and co. can lip read it (they’re a little lame, after all) they’ll be good to go. But Sarah lights up like it’s her birthday and tells Chuck what a great idea that is before she runs off. And he just stands there telling her she’s supposed to say no over and over XD
Sarah finds Carina and tells her that if she wants her help, she has to help Sarah first by protecting Chuck's cover. By going on a double date with Morgan. So, how is this helping Chuck’s cover, other than by creating wacky TV show hijinks that have nothing to do with his cover at all? But Carina’s down. Now, which one was Morgan again? Ugh. She smiles at him and he FREAKS OUT XD Like a little puppy dog or something. And then he starts making it like he’s riding...something…Morgan…you couldn’t just be endearing, could you? Poor Chuck, he looks horrified at the entire situation.
And we cut to later that night, at Chuck’s house. Carina remarks how cute Chuck and Sarah are while Morgan (seated next to her on the couch) agrees. And Chuck and Sarah’s reactions say it all
I love how Sarah is trying to keep her cover whilst simultaneously giving Carina the finger with her eyes. ...And Chuck just looks confused.
Chuck gets all awkward and lightly punches his cover girlfriend in the leg. Sarah, however, turns up the heat a little as she shoves her chest in his face, but subtly. Carina’s voice is about half an octave higher as she asks them how they met. And Morgan is obviously curious about something else.
Dear, God
And Chuck’s reaction makes me laugh. He’s in full rabbit mode again as he stammers out that they met at work. The entire time the group talks, Sarah and Carina keep shooting each other catty looks. Morgan clarifies; Sarah came in with a broken phone like a modern day damsel in distress. Carina, her eyes still glued to Sarah, mentions that a lot of people end up dating coworkers. And, she and Sarah, once again, exchange bitchy looks. And, poor Chuck, just looks uncomfortable and slightly confused.
Sarah quickly changes the subject. Who wants to watch a movie? Chuck remarks how good an idea that is and Sarah…oh, Sarah. She starts rubbing his neck while he’s midsentence and…well…I guess it’s been a while, eh, Chuck? ‘Cause that man’s face XD He reacts like her hand is somewhere else, if you ask me. But he manages to rabbit out the rest of his response. He rented out that penguin movie. Yippee! But Morgan thinks a movie is a terrible idea; he’d rather talk to Carina more, get to her better.
She gets all flirty and leans in, putting a hand on his shoulder, asking him what he wants to know. Sarah looks annoyed as fuck and Chuck continues to look confused. Oh, Morgan. He’s so awkward. He asks Carina if she’s always been this hot or if it’s recently found. She just giggles and tells him how cute he is. And he looks like he’s having the best dream of his life.
Cut to Chuck grabbing a couple slice of pizza (loaded with black olives, I might add) when Morgan sneaks up next to him. Apparently, Carina is really into him. Chuck replies, “Seems that way, doesn’t it” in a very unenthusiastic (and abnormally, for him, deep) voice. Morgan immediately demands to know what that means. But Chuck covers his tracks.
Meanwhile, Sarah tells Carina that she can lay off it with Morgan just a teensy bit. But Carina is just behaving how she would on a date. Sarah insists that she’ll give him the wrong idea but Carina stands her ground, she’s just “giving the kid a thrill.” …I’m going to pretend that she didn’t just call him kid. She then goes on about how fucking boring this assignment is but Sarah assures her that she’s good there. Cue Chuck and Morgan with the pizza.
The movie’s on and I laugh as Morgan shakes his head the way the penguin on screen does. Chuck takes a giant bite of his pizza as he watches Sarah pick the olives off again (why does he look so perplexed? She did it last time, it’s natural that she’ll do it again. But, then again, he’s had this expression on his face ever since the credits rolled). Morgan whispers to Carina, asking her if she likes to travel. And I roll my eyes. She keeps on flirting but Sarah and Chuck shush them. Morgan presses on though, asking where she was last. Chuck yells out, “Argentina, okay? Now will you shut up, they’re almost at the Antarctic!”
Sarah looks a little uncomfortable, Morgan looks mortally wounded, and Carina looks suspicious as all hell before looking decidedly intrigued (and slightly turned on…but that’s just her personality, I guess). Oh, Chuck, you accidentally let some Intersect info slip there, buddy.
Morgan then asks Carina if she wants to go somewhere more private…like Chuck’s room. Oh, Morgan. All the progress you made in Tango is gone, isn’t it? Cut to Chuck sleeping (God, that bed looks comfy) when his phone goes off. And I die laughing at the noise he makes instead of a “hello” when he answers the phone. Also! This cast is really good at actually acting tired. I noticed it in Tango as well, with Awesome. ‘Sounds like a stupid thing to point out, but it’s a pet peeve of mine when actors just wake up all “La dee da, I was totally just sleeping! Can’t you tell by how awake and perky am I?” Anyway.
Morgan is awake and…pacing back and forth in the courtyard…outside of Chuck’s apartment. Seriously…this guy redefines clingy. He wants to know if Carina called about him yet. Though, why she would call Chuck (or why Sarah would call Chuck if Carina called her), I have no idea. Even if their cover life were real. Chuck is all groggy and cranky, rightfully so, and hangs up on his friend after telling him no.
His phone immediately rings again. Dear, God. Morgan starts talking and Chuck puts the phone to his mouth and yells, “I AM ASLEEP” and I’m crying from laughter (I, sadly, have an older sister who decides the best time to talk is when I’m sleeping. And she never gets the hint until I yell that I’m sleeping). Morgan retorts that that’s not true because they’re talking. And now I’m red in the face. I’ve had this exact same conversation with said sister. But Chuck hung up. Good man.
His phone rings AGAIN and he picks up and immediately rips his buddy a new one, capping it off by calling him “Organ”. And we all know where this is going. He pauses a moment, as the funky drum beat kicks in, before speaking again, “…and ‘hello’ to you too, m’am. Yes, I-I am, uh, the on-call Nerd Herder…for all Nerd Herd computer emergencies…” well, congratulations, Chuck, ‘cause now I can’t breathe, I’m laughing so hard. It’s predictable as fuck but it’s still hysterical. And as he asks the lady for her room number…I groan.
He knocks on her door (M 903, for the curious folk) and…surprise!!! ‘Guess who answers
Shoot me now, please
The good news is, Chuck does one of the best double takes I’ve ever seen (accompanied by an awesome sound effect) so I find myself laughing again. He also looks her up and down, very quickly (he’s a guy; he can’t be blamed, I guess). Carina snarks, “Use your feet,” wagging her finger for him to come in. Ugh. Why don’t I like her? I should like her! That line was awesome and I think the actress playing her is good, so why don’t I like her?!
She opens a bottle of champagne (properly, I might add) while Chuck stands there, clutching his briefcase for dear life. As she pours them each a glass, he asks where her computer is. Oh, Chuck. She explains - she doesn’t have one and lied to get him there. ‘Cause we’re retarded and needed to be told that last part. But, apparently, Chuck is too, as he asks (in the best voice ever XD), “Why would you do that?”
Carina answers vaguely, “’Cause I know you’re with us.” Ahh, I get it. But Chuck still doesn’t. He asks both who is us, and who’s with us as she hands him a glass. He takes it, but clearly doesn’t want it. She explains how she knows: no one can access her file, to know about Argentina, unless they have G6 clearance or higher.
She clinks his glass with hers while he just gapes at her. They toast to spying, though Chuck just stands there and smiles nervously, before Carina pushes him down onto the bed. And he drops his briefcase…are men really this comically obvious in real life with a “super hot” chick?
She then takes off her robe, hoping he’ll like what he sees. And he just stares at her chest and tries to get the same three words out three times. He continues to stammer like a fiend as he decides to call Sarah, reaching for his phone in his pocket. Carina laughs, and throws his phone on the bed, saying he isn’t much of a spy. And now Chuck is looking anywhere but at her (go, Chuck!).
Then she pulls on her bra strap (and we Chuck exhale pretty loudly off camera), saying she doesn’t know how many more clothes she can take off. But, if Sarah were there then she couldn’t seduce him. Unless he’s into that sort of thing. And now she’s playing with his mouth and his tie, and just…this poor man. He’s helpless.
He holds up a finger, “…Just one..” and then downs his glass in one gulp. Carina crawls up behind him on the bed and asks, seductively, right into his ear, if he’s sleeping with Sarah. But, you know that a gentleman never…and that’s all she needed to hear. And it makes sense, considering Bryce…But Chuck doesn’t understand (which seems to be his default setting this episode). So Carina clarifies. Bryce Larkin was Sarah’s boyfriend. And as Chuck looks into the camera with complete shock and heartbreak, we cut to a commercial.
Oh, Carina, Carina, Carina. I really don’t see the point of your character other than make male viewers drool and to cause relationship drama to make for "more interesting" plots. Anyway.
We come back to find Chuck at the Wienerlicious, staring at his, perfectly cooked (I’m guessing Sarah had nothing to do with that), corn dog as if someone just told him that they bought him a puppy and then ran over it with a Mack truck.
Meanwhile, Sarah is going over the details of their mission - they’re to go in as party guests and locate the diamond. Chuck doesn’t look at her as he asks where the diamond is. And he sounds about as happy as he looks. But that’s Chuck’s job. Since the Intersect knew about the bad guy, it’ll help them locate the diamond. And that’s all they’re to do; locate the stone and get out. Chuck repeats what she said, with that same sad tone, and Sarah looks concerned and confused. She asks if he’s okay and he pretends that he is. Also, Guy Who Suddenly Works There is milling around behind the counter.
Sarah, being so in touch with how people behave, asks Chuck if he's sick. But, nope; he’s fine. Again, still staring into space with a depressed monotone to his voice. So, naturally, seeing that he’s, clearly, fine, Sarah brings the conversation back to business. Chuck has to make sure and stay by Sarah’s side. Carina likes to improvise and things can “get sticky fast.” Oh, that wording…I bet they can. Anyway, she likes trouble and looks for it. In fact, this one time, in Pakistan, Sarah really had to save her ass and…it doesn’t matter. And Chuck finally looks at her as she tells him that Carina is not to be trusted.
And, guess what, Chuck? We found the puppy! It’s alive! And it’s carrying a chocolate-covered rainbow made out of love and happiness, just for you! At least, that’s what he just heard, judging by his reaction. He even tells Sarah how happy he is to hear her say that. She just smiles and asks why. Oh, boy. This conversation is not going to end well.
He tells her that Carina said something last night and she cuts him off, hung up on the words “last night.” But Chuck explains exactly what happened - minus the sexy underwear and champagne, of course. Sarah immediately tenses up, demanding to know what Carina told Chuck. Just as the words come out, Guy interrupts them; Sarah’s break has been over for some time now. She politely asks for another second before looking back to Chuck, serious as ever, as she asks what Carina said.
Chuck smiles uncomfortably and insists that it doesn’t even matter if it’s not true, right? But Sarah looks pained and even annoyed as she tells him, again, to tell her what she said. His face falls before he can even get the words out. Aw, Chuck, you already know…But he talks. It was something about Bryce and Sarah…you know…being together…and Sarah’s face says it all, almost as much as her silence.
Something changes in Chuck’s face - he still looks sad, of course, but now he looks hurt as well (rightfully so, damn it). And he kind of looks confused…but I chalk it up to him wondering why in the hell she hid that from him! Sarah looks pretty much the same as before, though a little more upset. It looks like she’s finally about to say something, when Guy interjects, now standing right at the table. He’s sure that whatever they’re discussing is a matter of national security (ahahaha…I’m just being snarky, it is cute) but the ketchup vat isn’t going to refill itself.
Sarah pulls him aside and lays out one of the least threatening threats I’ve heard in a long time, “Did you know that 55% of all accidents occur in the kitchen? And ‘m sure most of them are accidents.” I’m sorry, but anything that takes me longer than a second to understand fully…not a good threat.
She sits back down, though this time in a different seat *shrug* and finally has an expression on her face. Poor Sarah, she looks like she’s about to cry as Chuck asks her if it’s not true, his eyes still glued to the table. And then he looks at her. And she just…aw, Sarah. She tells him it was complicated. But all Chuck can say is, “I thought you were supposed to be good at lying” and you can feel the anger and hurt coming off that man in waves as he leaves Sarah sitting at the table.
Damn! I keep saying it but this cast is just…they’re all such good actors. I mean, just look at those faces. Nothing over the top or too scaled back - they know exactly how much to give and when to give it. But, enough of that, there’s party music playing and blue waves crashing! Which means we’re at Peyman’s Malibu Compound! :D
There’s women playing and splashing around the pool, everyone has a drink; it’s a good time. But next time Chuck is buying his suit. I mean, he can see his own boxer shorts through his incredibly white pants. Carina pulls him in close and tells him that he looks very sexy. Oh, and Sarah is watching them.
Carina tells Chuck that she knows that Sarah warned him about her. But she also has an amazing record because of her willingness to improvise and take risks. So, Chuck just needs to trust her. And I can’t tell if he really does or not as he nods his head. I’m thinking his better judgment is screaming for him not to, but his anger at Sarah is telling him the opposite. Oh, the hijinks that will arise. Carina points out an insanely hairy man sitting at the pool, surrounded by women.
He’s Peyman. Chuck asks if she’s talking about Senior Wookie XD Oh, Chuck. I love you. So much. Carina tells him to just grab a drink and look casual. As he walks away, he breezes right past Sarah. Ouch. Sarah shares some security info with her frenemy before asking why she told him about Bryce. But Carina spits out that they’re on a mission and Sarah should try to keep her private and professional lives separate for a change. Ouch again. But she kind of has a point.
Sarah finds Chuck and asks if he’s okay, how he’s doing. He says he’s cool but anyone could see that he’s really not. And he counts six SVB-54 yada fancy security cameras yada. Sarah asks if he flashed but he didn’t, they sell them at the spy shop in the Buy More plaza.
Meanwhile, we see what menial job Casey has this week. He’s the driver. Some big guy approaches him and asks if he has a light. But Casey decides he’d rather snark (albeit badly), “Studies indicate that smoking can be hazardous to your health.” Really…? But then he kind of saves it by telling Big Guy to pick up a paper…from the sixties.
He sure showed him
Back with Chuck and the ladies, they’re surveying the perimeter of the compound, and Chuck is helping them to pick out the cameras. Though, being spies, you’d think they’d be able to spot them too. Carina picks the lock to one of the doors while Chuck muses (in glorious ADR) that if this were Sarah and Bryce, they’d probably be making their way to the bedroom. Sarah ADR’s for him to shut it as they head inside.
They find a giant sealed room and Carina whips out a fancy decoder thingie and soon they’re inside. And, dead center, on a little pedestal, is the diamond. Chuck walks around it, in awe, while Carina says hello to her little precious. But Sarah really thinks they should leave. And cue the baddies.
Jesus, he is hairy. And short.
He asks if they like his diamond. Sarah immediately plays the ditz and asks who the Wookie is. He says that pretty girls call him Peyman. Carina immediately says, “Hi, Peyman” with a smile. And Chuck says, “Hey, Peyman” too XD! At least, he starts to, when Carina interrupts, introducing Sarah and “Chuckie” as her siblings. Wookie is happy about that; ‘means he gets these girls all to himself.
As he puts his hairy-ass arms around the ladies, Carina asks how she could get that thing on her finger. Wookie laughs and says that it’s said that he who owns the…whatever it’s called…rules the world. Chuck just sort of stands there and watches as Carina asks what would happen if someone tried to steal it. Smoooooth. But it’s impossible to steal. If the diamond is touched, the vault seals itself, gas would fill the room, and a team would come down to eliminate the threat. And as if we didn’t get the point, he makes a little gun with his hand and fires it, “pff!” Sarah goes, ‘Ooh!” all surprised XD
Chuck looks like he’s shitting himself three times over. And then Wookie pinches Sarah’s ass. But, you know, she saw some really cool paintings outside and would love to have a look. Good thinking, Sarah, even if your ditz voice is obviously put on. They take a look and Wookie keeps on saying sexist things.
Meanwhile, in the vault, Chuck gets a look at the diamond from another angle, focusing his eyes on the base for a moment. Cue the flash! Damn! These flashes are getting more intense. He practically jumped ten feet out of his skin when he came out of that last one. Or Zac Levi is still figuring out exactly how to show that Chuck just flashed (he did, after all, come up with the “flash face” on his own. As much as he wishes he could change it now XD). Anyways.
He shares with Carina that Wookie failed to mention that there are 20,000 volts of electricity also in place to protect the stone. She asks Chuck how they can fix that and he looks pretty damn surprised, questioning out loud why she’s asking him. But Sarah told Carina that Chuck has this “really big brain”. So, for a follow-up mission, what would he recommend? Chuck, if you answer her…you’re an idiot. A sweet, naïve idiot.
... Sure enough.
He would use compressed air to knock it off the pedestal. Carina asks for an example and, as Chuck thinks aloud, he spots a fire extinguisher in the corner, saying that would work. Chuuuuuuuck. Carina immediately grabs the extinguisher while Chuck protests. But she blows the diamond off its stand and Chuck catches it, knocking down a bust in the process. The gas emits, and the door begins to lower. But Carina knocks one of the busts’ stands down, stopping the door from dropping further. Sarah then punches Wookie while Chuck bags the diamond.
Carina slides under the door while Sarah scolds her. But then the thugs show up. The pair kick some ass while Chuck assures himself that this is just like Little League before he slides under the door (hey! Carina had a stuntwoman do her slide but Zac did his own). He flails around as Sarah helps him up and tells her that he got the diamond. They run outside and Sarah asks her partner what the hell she was thinking as they continue to pummel the guards (and Chuck just points at the guards XD).
Carina made a split-second decision; she was doing them all a favor. Chuck runs across the little stones in the pool and tells a woman that she needs more sun block. Then a goon with a gun approaches. Just before he shoots, Sarah grabs a plate and throws it, chakram-style, knocking out the goon! 'Don’t know what a chakram is? =O
It’s this, silly
Chuck thanks Sarah and the trio runs, Sarah contacting Casey in the process. As he heads off to meet them, he trips a goon that’s running by. And to think, he seemed like such a badass in the beginning of the show. Never mind, he also punches the guy in the face. He stumbles towards the limo and then takes one look at the Hummer the goon has. Oh, Casey, I know what you’re thinking. And I like it.
Meanwhile, Carina (with damp hair o_O) is running on the beach, Chuck and Sarah in tow. Carina tells the pair to run, she’ll take the diamond, that way the baddies follow her, she’ll deal with them, and the team can come back for her later. Sarah immediately tells Chuck not to trust her. Chuck just yells, “Oh, yeah?” and as the music turns oddly soap operatic, so does the editing as it to cuts from Chuck’s angered face to Carina’s and back to Chuck’s as he asks Sarah which lie she’s referring to. And Sarah’s hair-covered face caps off the daytime show scene.
He tosses the diamond to Carina. She immediately pushes a button on her watch and…a jet ski rises up from the water. Chuck just gapes at her while Sarah screams out, “YOU PLANNED THIS?!” Oh, boy. Carina runs off and strips, revealing a bikini….And Chuck and Sarah just stand by and watch as she scampers off, tears off her clothes, and hops on the jet ski. By the time they even think to friggin’ blink she’s, of course, far, far away.
Wow.
Well, up until that point, I was really enjoying that sequence of events. But then Chuck had to act like a five-year old while Sarah decided to just stand there and stare at Carina’s 007-esque escape. Which, frankly, was the best part (the jet ski). They couldn’t even try to run after her and have her get away? Hell, when Sarah chased her at a snail’s pace out of the Wienerlicous earlier in the episode, at least she fucking tried. But. The stunts were fun and funny, Peyman is disgusting, and Chuck, once again, shows his smarts by coming up with the idea to the use the fire extinguisher. But, ugh, ugh, ugh on how they ended it all.
We come back from commercial right where we left off. Only, this time, Sarah’s looking horrified at something behind them. Two baddies. Chuck starts scrrrrrreaming before they even pull out their guns just as Casey shows up, sans hat. He yells at them to get in the car as he starts shooting the beach up. And the baddies leave. Really? That easily? Okay. Peyman needs some new guards; these guys are lazy.
Casey speeds off and Sarah starts yelling at Chuck from the backseat about how she has to be able to trust Chuck on a mission, no matter how he’s feeling about her personally. Also, she’s totally getting naked.
Chuck retorts back that he had no way of knowing that Carina had a remote control jet ski, seeing as it’s not an option in real life. Chuck, you never fail to make me laugh with your wit. But, their orders were to bring the diamond in. Chuck wonders aloud what she could do with the diamond and Casey fills him in. She’ll give it to her bosses and move up the DEA’s “covert ranks”. Right, then.
And Chuck starts to watch Sarah changing. But, he’s not just being a perv, he wants to know what she’s doing. Wow, man, Sarah is pissed off. Seriously, she’s showing more emotion in this scene than she has in these four episodes combined right now. She has to work her “stupid hot dog shift”. If she calls in sick again, she’ll get “canned”, as it were.
I couldn’t resist, mate. (What? Saying “as it were” always makes me think of the good Captain GO SEE RANGO)
And we see what Carina’s up to. She’s parked the ski and is giving Sarah a call as she walks to her BEAUTIFUL CAR. Sarah bitches at her, rightfully so, while Carina just acts nonchalant about abandoning them; she knew they’d make it out. Casey starts tracing the call while Sarah keeps talking. But Carina hangs up. Awesome. Casey tells Sarah to go to work; he’ll get the rock. The phone tracer worked. Yay. And Chuck is watching Sarah button her top in his mirror.
Why is she sitting like that? Other than the obvious “now everyone can imagine how wide her legs are spread without having to show them” thing
Casey quickly tells Chuck to focus his eyes up front. And Chuck doesn’t have a very good comeback XD
Carina is back at her hotel (in an awesome outfit) and she walks right by Morgan. Awww, he even has flowers. He calls after her but apparently she doesn’t hear it, seeing as we cut right to her packing a bag in her room. She hears the insanely loud sound of tires screeching (really, Casey? How fast did you need to go once you were there) and sees Casey pull up.
She grabs her shit and books it for the elevator. And it’s either going to be Casey or Morgan waiting for her.
Sure enough
Ugh, she calls him Martin again. And, again, he doesn’t correct her. But! What’s this? Casey went through the stairwell. He’s got eyes on Carina…and a gun. She looks pretty damn panicked as Morgan talks to her. But not for long. She gives him a passionate kiss, slipping the diamond in his bag.
Yup. He’s a replicant
She pushes him into the elevator and tells him it won’t work out because she’s got an old relationship thing. He, very sweetly, offers an ear if she’d like to talk about it and a cup of coffee, but she just can’t. And the elevator doors close. Casey is ready, however, and he takes her back to her room, demanding to know where the diamond is. But she swears she doesn’t have it. He starts pulling out dresser drawers and she starts taking off clothes, telling him to search anywhere…but to start with her.
And he literally drops the drawers. Really?! Is that really what guys do when they’re holding something and see semi-naked women? Drop everything? Ugh.
Back at the Buy More, Sarah runs in to let Chuck know that it’s been an hour since Casey checked in so she’s going to the hotel herself. And puts on a random jacket she grabbed. She also tells Chuck that he’s benched for the night and they’ll have a talk later about him not finishing his broccoli what happened on the beach. Lester comes over to rub salt into the wound, thinking it’s relationship trouble.
Chuck drowns his sorrows in video games, Morgan by his side. He tells Morgan that they had a fight. And Morgan lies down on his bed, grape soda in hand. Chuck starts to talk about it, clearly upset, but mid-rant realizes that Morgan isn’t even listening, saying so. He apologizes, but yeah, he stopped listening when it wasn’t about Carina. He tells Chuck that she kissed him and then dumped him. And Chuck’s face is priceless.
Morgan finishes his soda and chucks it across the room. Chuck immediately asks if he’d like another. He would; he feels a bender coming on. Nicely done, Morgan. Chuck goes to get him one and Morgan tells Chuck that he has a new game in his bag; Chuck just needs to grab it. Just as Chuck is about to walk away, for the second time, Morgan asks him for some pizza (I love how Chuck stops short, sort of annoyed XD). No problemo (d’aw, he’s a good friend). Aaaaand again. Just as he’s out of the doorway, Morgan stops him again. And Chuck sounds pretty annoyed now XD
But Morgan assures him that even if their relationships don’t work out, it’s okay because they have each other. And the second the words leave his lips, he makes this face XD as though he knows how what he’s saying sounds. As if Morgan didn’t already know, Chuck tells him how sad that is. And Morgan agrees XD
Cut to Sarah picking the lock on Carina’s door. She bursts in, gun at the ready to find this lovely sight
Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!
She mocks Casey and even takes a picture XD while Casey says, “Very funny! What are you doing?!” through his gag. Back at Nerd Central, Chuck takes the game out of Morgan’s bag and finds another, smaller bag on top of it. Hmmm, look familiar, Chuckles? He takes the diamond out, freaking out slightly, and flashes (why didn’t he flash the first time he saw it?) And I think now he’s got the flash face down.
Chuck immediately says “he who owns the Nadani-Noor rules the world…” out loud and has a mini freak out as he bags the diamond. He immediately calls Sarah and starts rambling. Halfway through, he pauses, “…wait, you know this is Chuck, right?” XD
He keeps rambling and tells her that the diamond is NOT a drug diamond but it, in fact, belongs to an Afghani terrorist group. Sarah simply asks Chuck to find Carina and bring her the diamond. And we see that she’s surrounded by goons, being held at gunpoint by the wookie himself.
We come back to find Chuck, now with pizza and soda for his little buddy, holding the diamond as well. He yells to Morgan that he’s got to go ahead an-oh, boy.
If you can’t tell who this is from the eyes and mouth…you’re blind.
Chuck, very courageously, tells the intruder to take whatever they want; he keeps some cash in his sock drawer. But they mutely point at the diamond. Kind of like a caveman. But Chuck can’t give that up because it doesn’t belong to him. He bolts and CavemanNinja filps through the hall and down the staircase, blocking the door. Chuck looks at the plate and thinks fast. All I can say is, Xena would be proud.
The plate hits CaveNinja right in the face. She starts rubbing at it, saying “ow!” and Chuck finally pieces it together, identifying her. Carina speaks, taking off her mask, saying she only wore it so “Martin” wouldn’t ID her. She’s there for the diamond. But Chuck, being Chuck, tries to convince her to go help Sarah. But Carina insists that she can handle herself. Chuck is horrified and disappointed. Carina fills him in on the spy world: everyone is in it for them selves.
But Chuck assures Carina that’s not what Sarah does. And-and-and (I love the stammer, ‘not gonna’ lie) if she would have thought that in Pakistan, then Carina wouldn’t be alive to have that conversation with him. Nice one, Chuck. And Carina’s reaction says it all.
You know, for a model, she’s a really good actress
Chuck hands over the diamond. But, with or without Carina, he’s going to go help Sarah. Chuck, you have redeemed yourself. This is pretty awesome. Carina caves and gives him back the diamond. Looks like he convinced her! Morgan yells about his pizza and Chuck tells him he has to get more. And his soda is on the kitchen floor XD
Meanwhile, Peyman is cuffing Sarah and being all “you don’t know who you’re dealing with” like he’s scary and intimidating. Oh, wait. Turns out, he was holding the diamond for a friend of his. I have to say, Sarah looks pretty calm right now. Points for her. And she’s being snarky. I’m starting to like her. As they take her away, Peyman tells the guy whom Casey punched before to keep an eye on him (he’s still stuck on the bed…in boxers that have clovers on ‘em XD). He inhales deeply from his cigar and blows it right in Casey’s face.
Over with team Cici (Chuck, Carina, “C” and”C”), Carina is picking a weapon and asking Chuck why he’s helping; she thought he and Sarah were still fighting. But Chuck just has to get used to how much spies have to lie about their lives. Carina’s probably only half-listening though, seeing as her only response is that she’s feeling like a knife fight.
Oh, wait, she was. Turns out field agents have it tougher than analysts…or assets (but Carina doesn’t know that); they shed identities as often as normal people shed clothes. Chuck quips that in Carina’s case, that’s quite often. Oh, Chuck, I love you.
But the whole point of this conversation is that spies can’t tell anywhere who they really are. They may have to leave them in five minutes…or shoot them in the head. And Carina assures him that that goes for all spies; it doesn’t matter who you are. As they enter the hotel, Carina gives the diamond to Chuck. Oh, and if they make it out alive, she wants to fuck him. And Chuck walks into a plant XD But Chuck is kind of stuck on the whole making it out alive part.
Over with Clovers McGee, he’s trying and trying to get his hands free as the sound of a toilet bowl flushing is heard off screen. And HOLY SHIT. He breaks the friggin’ headboard! Jesus, this man is the Hulk. He sits up and readies the board. Sure enough. When CigarThug comes out of the can, Casey smashes his face with the board. And makes a joke about smoking. Let’s just say, his first “joke” was funnier.
Team Cici meets up with Peyman, Sarah, and his goons. Peyman asks if they have what he wants. Carina says “maybe” while Chuck…Chuck does this
XD!
And she makes a bad joke too (uuugggh). But Peyman isn’t in the mood. He cocks his gun, causing Chuck to become much more nervous. Sarah wonders aloud why Carina has to provoke people. Peyman asks for the diamond again and no one moves. Finally, Chuck caves and tells them he has it, going so far as to take it out of the bag and show everyone.
Peyman asks for it but Carina says no. Chuck is pretty sure this is the part where they do what he says though. Carina smacks the diamond out of his hand and catches it. After all, Peyman didn’t say please. If he really wants it, he’ll have to take it from her. But he “reveals” (I put it in quotes ‘cause I thought we were supposed to know that from the get-go) that everyone else in the lobby is with him. And Chuck looks shocked as he sees all the goons around them. Peyman asks if she plans to fight them all by herself.
But she’s not by herself (go Sarah). Then Carina whips out the Swedish (it is Mini’s native country) and Sarah responds in Polish (Yvonne’s, surprisingly). Carina shoves Chuck backwards and she and Sarah start kicking some goon ass. While Chuck hides under a table XD But he manages to get a hold of the diamond.
Meanwhile, Casey is on his way downstairs, via the elevator. And there’s a mother and daughter in there with him XD He just smiles and says hello. Oh, and he’s got pants now.
Back to the ass kickery! Sarah gets an awesome hit in while Chuck scurries off to the hotel’s Business Center. While Sarah and Carina continue to kick all kinds of booty, Chuck locks the door just as a goon rams into it. He starts screaming that he has to hide the diamond. And as the bad guy beats down the door, he…prints out a shipping label. Ahaha, I see where this is going. Smart man, Chuck.
Chuck unfolds a FedEx box and throws the diamond in, packing and labeling it. And he’s struggling with it, much to my enjoyment. Finally, the goon beats the door down, only to find Chuck, holding the package just over the slot to send it to the mailroom. Chuck threatens to drop the package and since neither of them know where it will end up, that’s not something the goon wants to happen. The goon steps back but Chuck doesn’t really know what to do now…good thing Casey is there, board at the ready. He knocks the goon out cold, surprising Chuck in the process.
And Chuck drops the package. I’ll just let the caps speak for themselves.
This episode needs more moments like this ♥
We come back from commercial to an awesome song and General Beckman and Graham telling the team that now all of the evilness in the world is gone. Well, that’s the gist. From one diamond. Whatever. And Chuck and Sarah look pretty damn pleased with themselves, especially Chuck. Casey manages to just curl the corners of his lips up but for him, that’s grinning like the Chesire Cat.
As Graham finishes up his spiel…oh? What’s this? A FedEx courier arrives. Chuck immediately pales. And I start chuckling as Graham shakes the box around, the diamond clearly inside.
As Carina is getting ready to leave our team, all standing in the courtyard, she tells them she had fun. Casey tells her he never wants to work with her again XD But she hopes next time they can shake it up a bit, pull the four-leaf clovers out of the rotation. Casey just laughs and heads off. Sarah and Carina hug while Carina, again, rips on her frenemy’s cover life. But Sarah is happy.
She asks Chuck if he wants to talk that night over dinner. He’ll bring pizza (man, these people love their pizza). He’s barely said goodbye and Carina is right behind him, once again asking for a fuck. And he goes into rabbit mode, complete with tie fiddling (he is the very definition of endearing). He’s flattered and…intimidated, but why him?
Well, he’s sort of cute-ish (as Carina puts it) but the real reason? She loves taking what Sarah wants. But Chuck assures her that Sarah does not want him. Carina tells him that Sarah “probably doesn’t even know it herself yet” (has this writer only ever written soaps before? O_o) but Carina does. And with that, she leaves. And the smallest hint of a smile plays across Chuck’s features.
That night, Chuck goes to Sarah’s hotel room, pizza in hand, no olives. It’s the only real thing he knows about her - she doesn’t like olives. He apologizes for the beach, he shouldn’t let his feelings affect the mission. And, as for her and Bryce, well, it makes sense. He always got the great girls. Okay, you know what. I can’t even…this scene, Zac’s delivery, Yvonne’s reactions…I’m just going to link to it.
I can't embed it but it is so worth clicking
What is there to say? Clearly, Ali Adler’s (this episode’s writer) strong point is emotional moments because that was…well, that was probably one of the top three scenes of the whole damn episode, and one of the top ten of the show thus far. Unfortunately…
Well. This episode was up and down for me. It started off so strongly but then quickly we were whisked off to Cliche Land. I liked the main plot but I have to say that Carina…well, she wasn’t my favorite character. She was there to be looked at and to throw a wrench in the budding romance between Chuck and Sarah, all while spouting strong, powerful woman cliches left and right. And she was there to show what Sarah probably was like before her current mission, hence the over-the-top cold and detached attitude towards spying. I get that that's what certain characters are for, but I don't think that's all they should be there for; they should be fleshed out, 3D people as well. The action sequences were great but the majority of the jokes fell pretty flat. Chuck was immature as hell during the mission and quite a few plot points and character actions felt forced. I know I’m going to get flamed for saying this but, I liked this episode less than Helicopter. It wasn't terrible but it was mediocre by the standards Chuck has shown thus far.
Overall, Wookie gets a 6 out of 10.
But what did you think?
Rate each episode at Chuck Versus the Fans!
Click small pics for bigger versions
All pictures are snaggable, just comment and credit
Comments are ♥
Chuck Versus the Wookie
The sound of laughter greets us as we begin this week’s episode. We find ourselves in Chuck’s apartment with Sarah, Morgan, Ellie, and Awesome. Apparently Chuck has to get his head in the game, ‘cause it’s comeback time. Ellie is holding a paddle to her chest as she asks Awesome how she likes her eggs. Ah, this is one of those “how well do you know me?” games. Awesome says “poached” and Ellie pees herself with happiness and they kiss.
Wow, they are so happy all the time
Chuck is eating pizza, snarking about the game and Morgan turns his paddle around to show what his answer was
XD!
They’re all happy and smiley though as Chuck rolls and begins to write his answer down. The question? His all-time favorite pet. Sarah thinks aloud while Morgan begins to scribble an answer of his own. She finally answers, “Peaches!” And Chuck slaps her five, all happy that she got it right. But in the normal way, not the, “Omg I love you so much, baby!” way.
But Morgan cuts the celebrating short with an obnoxious buzzer sound. He then proceeds to correct Sarah on both the type of dog and name. Even though Chuck had Peaches on his card…Turns out, it was actually Peaches 2, not to be confused with the original Peaches who got hit by a car. Chuck’s expression goes from “ugh” to “wait, what?” and Ellie quickly shuts Morgan up, saying to just give it to Sarah. And Morgan has a mini hissy fit.
Chuck reminds Ellie that she said the original Peaches ran away. And her reaction is priceless. But she sticks to her story as she shoots Morgan a glare. And Morgan just sips his beer XD Poor Chuck. It’s Morgan’s turn now: most humiliating childhood nickname. And then the camera cuts to outside the apartment and the music grows ominous and sneaky. Dun dun dunnnnn! They’re being watched! maybe it’s just Casey, seeing as he’s been a fucking creeper lately
But Chuck promised Morgan he’d never say the nickname out loud. Morgan signals him that it’s fine and Chuck answers…Organ. Just as I laugh and feel bad for the guy, he literally runs over to Awesome, Ellie, and Sarah, shoves the paddle in their faces and yells, “BOOM! ORGAN! ORGAN!” to show just how much he and Chuck know about each other. Sarah just smiles at Chuck knowingly as he slaps his little buddy an unenthusiastic high five.
Hmm, seems someone doesn’t like olives. Chuck watches as Sarah meticulously picks them off of her pizza as the game continues. Everyone’s having fun, the whole “Peaches Organ” incident long forgotten. It’s Sarah’s turn: most dangerous situation ever. Though, “maost daengerrous situehtion evehr” might be more appropriate. She’s a great actress but, seriously, she needs to work on her accent a little; she’s clearly an Aussie. Anyways.
Chuck’s mouth sort of curls up inside itself and he clears his throat rather loudly. He evens “ums” all shaky and nervous as he shoots Sarah an awesome look
Though in still form, he looks more annoyed than he does in the episode o_O
But she doesn’t give him any help. Everyone waits expectantly while he throws out a decent guess. Turns out, it was sunburn…? And I die laughing as Chuck mirrors my confusion. But Sarah elaborates. She was nine, on a family vacation, and she and her sister accidentally put on baby oil instead of sunscreen. We hear the ending of the story (they ended up looking like lobsters) through the peepers perspective from outside the window. As Sarah finishes, she shoots a glance toward said window and her demeanor changes a bit.
Chuck, still nomming on some pizza, pulls another card and his demeanor changes as well. He and Morgan exchange a look as he writes his answer down. The question? Most hated person ever. Awesome shouts out how easy it is while Sarah just looks around, confused. She looks to Chuck, but he’s got his eyes fixated on the table. Aw, Chuck. Sarah guesses Harry Tang and everyone chuckles about how wrong she is. Chuck brushes it off, saying it’s a stupid game and never mind.
But Morgan, being the man he is, grabs the paddle from Chuck and tells Sarah it’s Bryce Larkin, all “DUH” like. I mean, the man pretended to be Chuck’s buddy, sexed up his girl, and then got him kicked out of exoposition land. And then he throws out a reference I doubt Sarah gets, “If Chuck is Solo, Larkin is his Fett!” The mood grows noticeably awkward as Chuck tells Morgan that they get it; Sarah doesn’t get a point. And I see that Morgan has regressed back to the jealous sidekick again.
Sarah says goodnight to Ellie, she and Chuck holding hands, and Ellie closes the door, going back inside. And the second the door clicks shut, their hands fall back to their sides. Aw…that has to be so…just…tough. They banter about Morgan for a bit, saying he’s like the Intersect on Chuck (XD) as we see through Peepers perspective again, this time they’re above the cover couple.
As we come back to normal, camera perspective, Chuck muses that he wishes he could access Sarah’s file, learn more about her. But, of course, the Intersect doesn’t really work like that. She stops walking, saying Chuck could always just ask her. Which surprises him slightly, seeing as he goes into rabbit mode (he’s always so stuttery when he’s nervous). He asks her about Bryce. And her face…oh, Chuck. Sometimes you’re so blind.
He asks how close they were and she says they were partners but they were never really friends. And I get a giant whiff of will they/won’t they hijinks. Oh, Sarah. You clearly have feelings for the Nerd in front of you; otherwise you would not be lying about Bryce. Chuck is suddenly more confident; he’s clearly relieved as he makes a few witty remarks. And Sarah smiles ♥ but she changes to the subject to that of cover identities: you’re still you, but the details are different. Peeper is still watching them as they talk about how Morgan got more sexual questions right than Sarah did…wh...h'okay, then…Basically, Chuck wants to know their cover story for that particular topic. Sarah tells him that they’re taking it slow. But! What’s that! Someone’s coming! Oh, no!
Of course, it isn’t Peeper but…surprise…Morgan. He realizes, unconvincingly, out loud that Chuck meant he’d walk Sarah (I smell a New Jersey native, judging by the way he says “Sarah”. He says the “a” like in the word “cat”) to her car. Which makes sense, seeing as Morgan doesn’t have a car. As he walks by, he shoots Sarah the most annoyed, territorial glare I’ve ever seen.
Cut to Sarah in her hotel room. D’aw, she has a fish! I hate to break it to you, Sarah, but without something generating bubbles in that little bowl…little fishie don’t have much time to live…Anyway. She feeds her fish and we see that Peeper is now watching her.
Though, I suppose, who could blame them?
She goes to the bathroom and runs the water for a shower. But! She sees Peeper's reflection in the spout/knob. She tenses for a second but grabs a pair of tights and shoves a bar of soap inside. Quick thinking, Walker! She turns and swings, just missing Peeper. And the Asian-inspired fight music blares. They continue to fight and, judging by Peeper's voice as they get pummeled, I’m saying they’re a lady peeper.
Sarah runs out of the bathroom and grabs a gun from her purse but she’s too slow. Lady Peeper lands a kick, knocking the gun away. So Sarah grabs a giant vase and starts smashing the place up, trying to hit Lady Peeper. They accidentally knock Fishie over and we see more of Sarah than I’d ever care to (being interested in the boys) as she prepares to charge at Lady Peeper. They both tumble to the ground and Lady Peeper elbows Sarah in the face, knocking her gun away from her. She reaches for…
Guess which one
Survey says… she reached for the fish (Oh, yes, oh, yes, oh, yes, they both - oh, yes, they both, oh, yes, they both - reached for the fish, the fish, the fish)! She puts it back in the bowl and turns it upright, sparing its fishie little life. Sarah, now complete with bloody nose, looks pretty damn confused. So, she whips off Lady Peeper's mask. Apparently she knew it was this redheaded chick; Lady Peeper always telegraphs her punches. Whatever that means.
LP snarks that Sarah’s nose says otherwise. And they keep smiling at each like they were just “partners” too o__O Sarah asks what her cover is - Carina (not to be confused with insaneboingo). Carina asks the same and Sarah tells her. Carina asks, making sure to emphasize Sarah’s cover name, what brings the CIA to L.A. Why, it’s the same thing that brings a DEA agent like Carina (yay exposition! That’s only slightly soiled. Looooooove fooooor saaaaale. For some reason, this is a very musical portion of the recap forced): a job. And we see from both the way Carina greeted her friend and the way she goes on about how boring Sarah’s current assignment is, that she’s a feisty one who loves her job and all the dangerous perks that go with it. And I roll my eyes at how coincidental it is that Agent Feisty is a redhead.
But Sarah isn’t stupid; if Feisty’s here, it means she needs something. Turns out she does: a diamond. Sarah quips about marriage but Feisty clarifies as she offers Sarah a hand. She’s going to steal one. And Sarah is going to help her. Sarah slaps her hand away and stands up on her own before muttering a cheesy line, “Couldn’t you just have called?” And cue the Emmy nominated credits.
We come back to find Chuck on his way to work the next morning. He notices Feisty just standing in the courtyard and they exchange a smile as he walks by. Just as he walks away from her, a flash is triggered (and now it comes with snazzy cue music! It’s basically a man going “ahhhhhh” all operatically. Or it could be an instrument. Anyway.). He sees that Feisty was in Argentina and that she’s a D.E.A agent. And he looks pretty freaked out.
He looks back at her, which catches her attention, but he quickly scurries away. The second he opens the door to Casey’s apartment, Casey whips out his gun. So does Sarah, but she’s a little slower. As they put the weapons away, Chuck asks the pair if they were aware of the D.E.A. agent in the courtyard. And, of course, they are. Chuck has a little look around, standing next to his handlers and asks if he should leave. But Graham’s voice sounds from the computer; he can stay.
Chuck looks to Casey’s computer (nice DELL plug) and asks who he’s looking at. Casey snarks at him to shut up; they’re in the middle of being debriefed. Graham continues. Apparently the diamond is very well hidden inside Peyman Alahi’s Malibu compound (funny, in the picture it looks like a beach house). Chuck whispers another question and is quickly “shhh”ed by Casey. Alahi is a big opium guy, very bad stuff. It’s the reason why the DEA is involved in the first place. Beckman finally joins in, telling the team that they’ll assist Carina in acquiring the rock. I love that she says “acquiring” inside of stealing. Just as I smile to myself with that little thought, Chuck repeats, “’Acquiring?’” XD Yes! Casey, once again, shushes him. And this time Sarah looks at him, as well as Chuck.
XD
The team will need to take Chuck to the compound to get his “Intersect data”, as Graham puts it, on Alahi’s alarm system. They’ll make the actual grab the following day. But Sarah is concerned about Carina. While she’s a tremendous agent, she cannot be trusted and Chuck is far too valuable. And Graham starts spouting official stuff about Alahi’s plans, yada, yada, yada, when Casey, of all people, interrupts him. He’s had…dealings…with Carina as well; she can be a wild card. Oh, Casey, you horny bastard.
But Beckman and Graham are well aware of what went down in Prague (oh, see what I did there). Sarah and Chuck immediately smile like the 12-year old boys they are, and Graham orders the team to immediately give the diamond to the proper authorities, not Carina. Chuck’s voice jumps half an octave for a second as he asks Casey what happened in Prague. And the look Casey shoots him
XD
Chuck decides he doesn’t need to know. Outside, Sarah introduces Carina to the team. Carina comments how nice it is to see Casey with his pants on. Ugh. I’m all about strong, powerful women who aren’t afraid to be as sexual as men but, for some reason, this just feels so forced and cliché. Chuck and Casey, once again, exchange some awesome glances before Carina asks Chuck who he is. He’s straight back to rabbit mode as he stutters out his name. Apparently, he’s also the new guy. Sarah clarifies; he’s an analyst. Just when things can’t get any more awkward…Morgan stumbles into the courtyard. Sarah quickly informs Carina that Morgan is just a civilian and introduces him to Carina. And, being Morgan, he decides to do this
Oh, Morgan
Cut right to the Buy More where Morgan is telling the story to Jeff and Lester while Chuck watches in the background. She said it was a pleasure to meet him but her eyes said…everything. Chuck chimes in, “Like Martin.” Jeff and Lester look confused. Carina called Morgan “Martin.” Morgan is totally fine with it though as he starts to ramble but! Tang is on the way, no time for idle chatter.
Morgan scampers away but Jeff and Lester, being Nerds, stay at the Nerd Herd desk. And Lester…oh, man, I’m starting to notice your comedic value, buddy. He asks Chuck how he’s supposed to get any female friction action with Morgan third-wheeling him all the time. I. Love. This. Show. Chuck asks him what in the hell that means and now I’m doubled over laughing as Lester stammers out “…s-sex…”. And soon, I’m wiping away tears of joy and laughter as Chuck asks Lester why he can’t just say that. Well, Chuck, naturally, that lacks flavor.
Over at the Wienerlicious, Carina and Sarah are reviewing some junk for the mission while Carina thinks out loud. She knows why Casey is there but she can’t figure out why they need Chuck. She asks Sarah what Chuck is analyzing; her? And I roll my eyes and groan. Sarah reacts pretty much the same way, but she shares their cover story with her old frienemy. “Speaking of,” (one thing this episode is severely lacking so far is subtlety of any kind) Carina offers her condolences for Bryce. As Sarah starts to get sincere and emotional, Carina bluntly and callously reminds Sarah that “getting dead is an occupational hazard.” And I react almost exactly the way Sarah does.
Though in still-form, you can't really see her roll her eyes
Carina tries to get some info about the assignment out of Sarah but it’s top secret. So, she’ll just go talk to Chuck about it. But Sarah assures Carina that that’s not happening either. Too bad she’s halfway out of the store. I try not to groan as Sarah struggles to catch up to her. I mean, Carina is walking at slasher-movie villain speed, in giant high heels, and Sarah is wearing flats, taking quick, albeit short (to keep the distance) steps. I only point it out because it’s so obvious to anyone watching that Sarah should have no problem catching her. Anyway.
Just as Sarah makes it to the door, some guy, who works at the Wienerlicious all of the sudden, comes in, asking her where she thinks she’s going. You’d think the CIA would give her a job higher up than a civilian so she could do whatever she wanted. But then we wouldn’t have hijinks.
Carina stalks around the Buy More with Morgan watching her the entire time. That is, before he gets up the nerve to jump out at her and say hi. She looks at him like he’s insane and asks him if he works there. For a spy, she’s got a shit memory for faces, huh? Morgan deflates and says that, yes, he does. He reminds her that they met that morning at Chuck’s, even calling himself Martin. Her eyes light up and she asks where Chuck is. Morgan tries to play it cool as Jeff and Lester watch from the Nerd Herd desk. They go on and on about how she is too good for him (why? Because she’s tall and skinny?) and how she’s too good for the store. Isn’t there a nicer establishment where beautiful people can shop? XD Lester, you are amazing in this episode!
Chuck makes his way to his desk and Carina sees him and waves, a giant smile now on her face. Chuck waves back (and even mumbles “hi” XD). Morgan goes back over to the Nerds and demands that Chuck fix up him with Fiesty. But Chuck is hesitant. Meanwhile, Sarah has finally caught up and demands that Carina back off. Morgan gets defensive, assuming that Chuck doesn’t think he’s good enough for a girl like Carina (why?!). He then insults his friend by insisting that if he can get Sarah, anything is possible. Lester keeps interjecting and agreeing and it is hysterical. But Morgan just wants to spread his wings.
Like so
Chuck finally caves in, but he’s not making any promises! He interrupts the two bickering ladies to pull Sarah aside. He just wants to ask her a favor, and he keeps telling her to say “no” but really say “nooo”, when he asks for her to fix Morgan up with Carina. And as the pair looks to the bearded wonder, I can’t help but laugh. It’s Chuck’s face, me thinks.
As long as Sarah exaggerates “no” enough that Morgan and co. can lip read it (they’re a little lame, after all) they’ll be good to go. But Sarah lights up like it’s her birthday and tells Chuck what a great idea that is before she runs off. And he just stands there telling her she’s supposed to say no over and over XD
Sarah finds Carina and tells her that if she wants her help, she has to help Sarah first by protecting Chuck's cover. By going on a double date with Morgan. So, how is this helping Chuck’s cover, other than by creating wacky TV show hijinks that have nothing to do with his cover at all? But Carina’s down. Now, which one was Morgan again? Ugh. She smiles at him and he FREAKS OUT XD Like a little puppy dog or something. And then he starts making it like he’s riding...something…Morgan…you couldn’t just be endearing, could you? Poor Chuck, he looks horrified at the entire situation.
And we cut to later that night, at Chuck’s house. Carina remarks how cute Chuck and Sarah are while Morgan (seated next to her on the couch) agrees. And Chuck and Sarah’s reactions say it all
I love how Sarah is trying to keep her cover whilst simultaneously giving Carina the finger with her eyes. ...And Chuck just looks confused.
Chuck gets all awkward and lightly punches his cover girlfriend in the leg. Sarah, however, turns up the heat a little as she shoves her chest in his face, but subtly. Carina’s voice is about half an octave higher as she asks them how they met. And Morgan is obviously curious about something else.
Dear, God
And Chuck’s reaction makes me laugh. He’s in full rabbit mode again as he stammers out that they met at work. The entire time the group talks, Sarah and Carina keep shooting each other catty looks. Morgan clarifies; Sarah came in with a broken phone like a modern day damsel in distress. Carina, her eyes still glued to Sarah, mentions that a lot of people end up dating coworkers. And, she and Sarah, once again, exchange bitchy looks. And, poor Chuck, just looks uncomfortable and slightly confused.
Sarah quickly changes the subject. Who wants to watch a movie? Chuck remarks how good an idea that is and Sarah…oh, Sarah. She starts rubbing his neck while he’s midsentence and…well…I guess it’s been a while, eh, Chuck? ‘Cause that man’s face XD He reacts like her hand is somewhere else, if you ask me. But he manages to rabbit out the rest of his response. He rented out that penguin movie. Yippee! But Morgan thinks a movie is a terrible idea; he’d rather talk to Carina more, get to her better.
She gets all flirty and leans in, putting a hand on his shoulder, asking him what he wants to know. Sarah looks annoyed as fuck and Chuck continues to look confused. Oh, Morgan. He’s so awkward. He asks Carina if she’s always been this hot or if it’s recently found. She just giggles and tells him how cute he is. And he looks like he’s having the best dream of his life.
Cut to Chuck grabbing a couple slice of pizza (loaded with black olives, I might add) when Morgan sneaks up next to him. Apparently, Carina is really into him. Chuck replies, “Seems that way, doesn’t it” in a very unenthusiastic (and abnormally, for him, deep) voice. Morgan immediately demands to know what that means. But Chuck covers his tracks.
Meanwhile, Sarah tells Carina that she can lay off it with Morgan just a teensy bit. But Carina is just behaving how she would on a date. Sarah insists that she’ll give him the wrong idea but Carina stands her ground, she’s just “giving the kid a thrill.” …I’m going to pretend that she didn’t just call him kid. She then goes on about how fucking boring this assignment is but Sarah assures her that she’s good there. Cue Chuck and Morgan with the pizza.
The movie’s on and I laugh as Morgan shakes his head the way the penguin on screen does. Chuck takes a giant bite of his pizza as he watches Sarah pick the olives off again (why does he look so perplexed? She did it last time, it’s natural that she’ll do it again. But, then again, he’s had this expression on his face ever since the credits rolled). Morgan whispers to Carina, asking her if she likes to travel. And I roll my eyes. She keeps on flirting but Sarah and Chuck shush them. Morgan presses on though, asking where she was last. Chuck yells out, “Argentina, okay? Now will you shut up, they’re almost at the Antarctic!”
Sarah looks a little uncomfortable, Morgan looks mortally wounded, and Carina looks suspicious as all hell before looking decidedly intrigued (and slightly turned on…but that’s just her personality, I guess). Oh, Chuck, you accidentally let some Intersect info slip there, buddy.
Morgan then asks Carina if she wants to go somewhere more private…like Chuck’s room. Oh, Morgan. All the progress you made in Tango is gone, isn’t it? Cut to Chuck sleeping (God, that bed looks comfy) when his phone goes off. And I die laughing at the noise he makes instead of a “hello” when he answers the phone. Also! This cast is really good at actually acting tired. I noticed it in Tango as well, with Awesome. ‘Sounds like a stupid thing to point out, but it’s a pet peeve of mine when actors just wake up all “La dee da, I was totally just sleeping! Can’t you tell by how awake and perky am I?” Anyway.
Morgan is awake and…pacing back and forth in the courtyard…outside of Chuck’s apartment. Seriously…this guy redefines clingy. He wants to know if Carina called about him yet. Though, why she would call Chuck (or why Sarah would call Chuck if Carina called her), I have no idea. Even if their cover life were real. Chuck is all groggy and cranky, rightfully so, and hangs up on his friend after telling him no.
His phone immediately rings again. Dear, God. Morgan starts talking and Chuck puts the phone to his mouth and yells, “I AM ASLEEP” and I’m crying from laughter (I, sadly, have an older sister who decides the best time to talk is when I’m sleeping. And she never gets the hint until I yell that I’m sleeping). Morgan retorts that that’s not true because they’re talking. And now I’m red in the face. I’ve had this exact same conversation with said sister. But Chuck hung up. Good man.
His phone rings AGAIN and he picks up and immediately rips his buddy a new one, capping it off by calling him “Organ”. And we all know where this is going. He pauses a moment, as the funky drum beat kicks in, before speaking again, “…and ‘hello’ to you too, m’am. Yes, I-I am, uh, the on-call Nerd Herder…for all Nerd Herd computer emergencies…” well, congratulations, Chuck, ‘cause now I can’t breathe, I’m laughing so hard. It’s predictable as fuck but it’s still hysterical. And as he asks the lady for her room number…I groan.
He knocks on her door (M 903, for the curious folk) and…surprise!!! ‘Guess who answers
Shoot me now, please
The good news is, Chuck does one of the best double takes I’ve ever seen (accompanied by an awesome sound effect) so I find myself laughing again. He also looks her up and down, very quickly (he’s a guy; he can’t be blamed, I guess). Carina snarks, “Use your feet,” wagging her finger for him to come in. Ugh. Why don’t I like her? I should like her! That line was awesome and I think the actress playing her is good, so why don’t I like her?!
She opens a bottle of champagne (properly, I might add) while Chuck stands there, clutching his briefcase for dear life. As she pours them each a glass, he asks where her computer is. Oh, Chuck. She explains - she doesn’t have one and lied to get him there. ‘Cause we’re retarded and needed to be told that last part. But, apparently, Chuck is too, as he asks (in the best voice ever XD), “Why would you do that?”
Carina answers vaguely, “’Cause I know you’re with us.” Ahh, I get it. But Chuck still doesn’t. He asks both who is us, and who’s with us as she hands him a glass. He takes it, but clearly doesn’t want it. She explains how she knows: no one can access her file, to know about Argentina, unless they have G6 clearance or higher.
She clinks his glass with hers while he just gapes at her. They toast to spying, though Chuck just stands there and smiles nervously, before Carina pushes him down onto the bed. And he drops his briefcase…are men really this comically obvious in real life with a “super hot” chick?
She then takes off her robe, hoping he’ll like what he sees. And he just stares at her chest and tries to get the same three words out three times. He continues to stammer like a fiend as he decides to call Sarah, reaching for his phone in his pocket. Carina laughs, and throws his phone on the bed, saying he isn’t much of a spy. And now Chuck is looking anywhere but at her (go, Chuck!).
Then she pulls on her bra strap (and we Chuck exhale pretty loudly off camera), saying she doesn’t know how many more clothes she can take off. But, if Sarah were there then she couldn’t seduce him. Unless he’s into that sort of thing. And now she’s playing with his mouth and his tie, and just…this poor man. He’s helpless.
He holds up a finger, “…Just one..” and then downs his glass in one gulp. Carina crawls up behind him on the bed and asks, seductively, right into his ear, if he’s sleeping with Sarah. But, you know that a gentleman never…and that’s all she needed to hear. And it makes sense, considering Bryce…But Chuck doesn’t understand (which seems to be his default setting this episode). So Carina clarifies. Bryce Larkin was Sarah’s boyfriend. And as Chuck looks into the camera with complete shock and heartbreak, we cut to a commercial.
Oh, Carina, Carina, Carina. I really don’t see the point of your character other than make male viewers drool and to cause relationship drama to make for "more interesting" plots. Anyway.
We come back to find Chuck at the Wienerlicious, staring at his, perfectly cooked (I’m guessing Sarah had nothing to do with that), corn dog as if someone just told him that they bought him a puppy and then ran over it with a Mack truck.
Meanwhile, Sarah is going over the details of their mission - they’re to go in as party guests and locate the diamond. Chuck doesn’t look at her as he asks where the diamond is. And he sounds about as happy as he looks. But that’s Chuck’s job. Since the Intersect knew about the bad guy, it’ll help them locate the diamond. And that’s all they’re to do; locate the stone and get out. Chuck repeats what she said, with that same sad tone, and Sarah looks concerned and confused. She asks if he’s okay and he pretends that he is. Also, Guy Who Suddenly Works There is milling around behind the counter.
Sarah, being so in touch with how people behave, asks Chuck if he's sick. But, nope; he’s fine. Again, still staring into space with a depressed monotone to his voice. So, naturally, seeing that he’s, clearly, fine, Sarah brings the conversation back to business. Chuck has to make sure and stay by Sarah’s side. Carina likes to improvise and things can “get sticky fast.” Oh, that wording…I bet they can. Anyway, she likes trouble and looks for it. In fact, this one time, in Pakistan, Sarah really had to save her ass and…it doesn’t matter. And Chuck finally looks at her as she tells him that Carina is not to be trusted.
And, guess what, Chuck? We found the puppy! It’s alive! And it’s carrying a chocolate-covered rainbow made out of love and happiness, just for you! At least, that’s what he just heard, judging by his reaction. He even tells Sarah how happy he is to hear her say that. She just smiles and asks why. Oh, boy. This conversation is not going to end well.
He tells her that Carina said something last night and she cuts him off, hung up on the words “last night.” But Chuck explains exactly what happened - minus the sexy underwear and champagne, of course. Sarah immediately tenses up, demanding to know what Carina told Chuck. Just as the words come out, Guy interrupts them; Sarah’s break has been over for some time now. She politely asks for another second before looking back to Chuck, serious as ever, as she asks what Carina said.
Chuck smiles uncomfortably and insists that it doesn’t even matter if it’s not true, right? But Sarah looks pained and even annoyed as she tells him, again, to tell her what she said. His face falls before he can even get the words out. Aw, Chuck, you already know…But he talks. It was something about Bryce and Sarah…you know…being together…and Sarah’s face says it all, almost as much as her silence.
Something changes in Chuck’s face - he still looks sad, of course, but now he looks hurt as well (rightfully so, damn it). And he kind of looks confused…but I chalk it up to him wondering why in the hell she hid that from him! Sarah looks pretty much the same as before, though a little more upset. It looks like she’s finally about to say something, when Guy interjects, now standing right at the table. He’s sure that whatever they’re discussing is a matter of national security (ahahaha…I’m just being snarky, it is cute) but the ketchup vat isn’t going to refill itself.
Sarah pulls him aside and lays out one of the least threatening threats I’ve heard in a long time, “Did you know that 55% of all accidents occur in the kitchen? And ‘m sure most of them are accidents.” I’m sorry, but anything that takes me longer than a second to understand fully…not a good threat.
She sits back down, though this time in a different seat *shrug* and finally has an expression on her face. Poor Sarah, she looks like she’s about to cry as Chuck asks her if it’s not true, his eyes still glued to the table. And then he looks at her. And she just…aw, Sarah. She tells him it was complicated. But all Chuck can say is, “I thought you were supposed to be good at lying” and you can feel the anger and hurt coming off that man in waves as he leaves Sarah sitting at the table.
Damn! I keep saying it but this cast is just…they’re all such good actors. I mean, just look at those faces. Nothing over the top or too scaled back - they know exactly how much to give and when to give it. But, enough of that, there’s party music playing and blue waves crashing! Which means we’re at Peyman’s Malibu Compound! :D
There’s women playing and splashing around the pool, everyone has a drink; it’s a good time. But next time Chuck is buying his suit. I mean, he can see his own boxer shorts through his incredibly white pants. Carina pulls him in close and tells him that he looks very sexy. Oh, and Sarah is watching them.
Carina tells Chuck that she knows that Sarah warned him about her. But she also has an amazing record because of her willingness to improvise and take risks. So, Chuck just needs to trust her. And I can’t tell if he really does or not as he nods his head. I’m thinking his better judgment is screaming for him not to, but his anger at Sarah is telling him the opposite. Oh, the hijinks that will arise. Carina points out an insanely hairy man sitting at the pool, surrounded by women.
He’s Peyman. Chuck asks if she’s talking about Senior Wookie XD Oh, Chuck. I love you. So much. Carina tells him to just grab a drink and look casual. As he walks away, he breezes right past Sarah. Ouch. Sarah shares some security info with her frenemy before asking why she told him about Bryce. But Carina spits out that they’re on a mission and Sarah should try to keep her private and professional lives separate for a change. Ouch again. But she kind of has a point.
Sarah finds Chuck and asks if he’s okay, how he’s doing. He says he’s cool but anyone could see that he’s really not. And he counts six SVB-54 yada fancy security cameras yada. Sarah asks if he flashed but he didn’t, they sell them at the spy shop in the Buy More plaza.
Meanwhile, we see what menial job Casey has this week. He’s the driver. Some big guy approaches him and asks if he has a light. But Casey decides he’d rather snark (albeit badly), “Studies indicate that smoking can be hazardous to your health.” Really…? But then he kind of saves it by telling Big Guy to pick up a paper…from the sixties.
He sure showed him
Back with Chuck and the ladies, they’re surveying the perimeter of the compound, and Chuck is helping them to pick out the cameras. Though, being spies, you’d think they’d be able to spot them too. Carina picks the lock to one of the doors while Chuck muses (in glorious ADR) that if this were Sarah and Bryce, they’d probably be making their way to the bedroom. Sarah ADR’s for him to shut it as they head inside.
They find a giant sealed room and Carina whips out a fancy decoder thingie and soon they’re inside. And, dead center, on a little pedestal, is the diamond. Chuck walks around it, in awe, while Carina says hello to her little precious. But Sarah really thinks they should leave. And cue the baddies.
Jesus, he is hairy. And short.
He asks if they like his diamond. Sarah immediately plays the ditz and asks who the Wookie is. He says that pretty girls call him Peyman. Carina immediately says, “Hi, Peyman” with a smile. And Chuck says, “Hey, Peyman” too XD! At least, he starts to, when Carina interrupts, introducing Sarah and “Chuckie” as her siblings. Wookie is happy about that; ‘means he gets these girls all to himself.
As he puts his hairy-ass arms around the ladies, Carina asks how she could get that thing on her finger. Wookie laughs and says that it’s said that he who owns the…whatever it’s called…rules the world. Chuck just sort of stands there and watches as Carina asks what would happen if someone tried to steal it. Smoooooth. But it’s impossible to steal. If the diamond is touched, the vault seals itself, gas would fill the room, and a team would come down to eliminate the threat. And as if we didn’t get the point, he makes a little gun with his hand and fires it, “pff!” Sarah goes, ‘Ooh!” all surprised XD
Chuck looks like he’s shitting himself three times over. And then Wookie pinches Sarah’s ass. But, you know, she saw some really cool paintings outside and would love to have a look. Good thinking, Sarah, even if your ditz voice is obviously put on. They take a look and Wookie keeps on saying sexist things.
Meanwhile, in the vault, Chuck gets a look at the diamond from another angle, focusing his eyes on the base for a moment. Cue the flash! Damn! These flashes are getting more intense. He practically jumped ten feet out of his skin when he came out of that last one. Or Zac Levi is still figuring out exactly how to show that Chuck just flashed (he did, after all, come up with the “flash face” on his own. As much as he wishes he could change it now XD). Anyways.
He shares with Carina that Wookie failed to mention that there are 20,000 volts of electricity also in place to protect the stone. She asks Chuck how they can fix that and he looks pretty damn surprised, questioning out loud why she’s asking him. But Sarah told Carina that Chuck has this “really big brain”. So, for a follow-up mission, what would he recommend? Chuck, if you answer her…you’re an idiot. A sweet, naïve idiot.
... Sure enough.
He would use compressed air to knock it off the pedestal. Carina asks for an example and, as Chuck thinks aloud, he spots a fire extinguisher in the corner, saying that would work. Chuuuuuuuck. Carina immediately grabs the extinguisher while Chuck protests. But she blows the diamond off its stand and Chuck catches it, knocking down a bust in the process. The gas emits, and the door begins to lower. But Carina knocks one of the busts’ stands down, stopping the door from dropping further. Sarah then punches Wookie while Chuck bags the diamond.
Carina slides under the door while Sarah scolds her. But then the thugs show up. The pair kick some ass while Chuck assures himself that this is just like Little League before he slides under the door (hey! Carina had a stuntwoman do her slide but Zac did his own). He flails around as Sarah helps him up and tells her that he got the diamond. They run outside and Sarah asks her partner what the hell she was thinking as they continue to pummel the guards (and Chuck just points at the guards XD).
Carina made a split-second decision; she was doing them all a favor. Chuck runs across the little stones in the pool and tells a woman that she needs more sun block. Then a goon with a gun approaches. Just before he shoots, Sarah grabs a plate and throws it, chakram-style, knocking out the goon! 'Don’t know what a chakram is? =O
It’s this, silly
Chuck thanks Sarah and the trio runs, Sarah contacting Casey in the process. As he heads off to meet them, he trips a goon that’s running by. And to think, he seemed like such a badass in the beginning of the show. Never mind, he also punches the guy in the face. He stumbles towards the limo and then takes one look at the Hummer the goon has. Oh, Casey, I know what you’re thinking. And I like it.
Meanwhile, Carina (with damp hair o_O) is running on the beach, Chuck and Sarah in tow. Carina tells the pair to run, she’ll take the diamond, that way the baddies follow her, she’ll deal with them, and the team can come back for her later. Sarah immediately tells Chuck not to trust her. Chuck just yells, “Oh, yeah?” and as the music turns oddly soap operatic, so does the editing as it to cuts from Chuck’s angered face to Carina’s and back to Chuck’s as he asks Sarah which lie she’s referring to. And Sarah’s hair-covered face caps off the daytime show scene.
He tosses the diamond to Carina. She immediately pushes a button on her watch and…a jet ski rises up from the water. Chuck just gapes at her while Sarah screams out, “YOU PLANNED THIS?!” Oh, boy. Carina runs off and strips, revealing a bikini….And Chuck and Sarah just stand by and watch as she scampers off, tears off her clothes, and hops on the jet ski. By the time they even think to friggin’ blink she’s, of course, far, far away.
Wow.
Well, up until that point, I was really enjoying that sequence of events. But then Chuck had to act like a five-year old while Sarah decided to just stand there and stare at Carina’s 007-esque escape. Which, frankly, was the best part (the jet ski). They couldn’t even try to run after her and have her get away? Hell, when Sarah chased her at a snail’s pace out of the Wienerlicous earlier in the episode, at least she fucking tried. But. The stunts were fun and funny, Peyman is disgusting, and Chuck, once again, shows his smarts by coming up with the idea to the use the fire extinguisher. But, ugh, ugh, ugh on how they ended it all.
We come back from commercial right where we left off. Only, this time, Sarah’s looking horrified at something behind them. Two baddies. Chuck starts scrrrrrreaming before they even pull out their guns just as Casey shows up, sans hat. He yells at them to get in the car as he starts shooting the beach up. And the baddies leave. Really? That easily? Okay. Peyman needs some new guards; these guys are lazy.
Casey speeds off and Sarah starts yelling at Chuck from the backseat about how she has to be able to trust Chuck on a mission, no matter how he’s feeling about her personally. Also, she’s totally getting naked.
Chuck retorts back that he had no way of knowing that Carina had a remote control jet ski, seeing as it’s not an option in real life. Chuck, you never fail to make me laugh with your wit. But, their orders were to bring the diamond in. Chuck wonders aloud what she could do with the diamond and Casey fills him in. She’ll give it to her bosses and move up the DEA’s “covert ranks”. Right, then.
And Chuck starts to watch Sarah changing. But, he’s not just being a perv, he wants to know what she’s doing. Wow, man, Sarah is pissed off. Seriously, she’s showing more emotion in this scene than she has in these four episodes combined right now. She has to work her “stupid hot dog shift”. If she calls in sick again, she’ll get “canned”, as it were.
I couldn’t resist, mate. (What? Saying “as it were” always makes me think of the good Captain GO SEE RANGO)
And we see what Carina’s up to. She’s parked the ski and is giving Sarah a call as she walks to her BEAUTIFUL CAR. Sarah bitches at her, rightfully so, while Carina just acts nonchalant about abandoning them; she knew they’d make it out. Casey starts tracing the call while Sarah keeps talking. But Carina hangs up. Awesome. Casey tells Sarah to go to work; he’ll get the rock. The phone tracer worked. Yay. And Chuck is watching Sarah button her top in his mirror.
Why is she sitting like that? Other than the obvious “now everyone can imagine how wide her legs are spread without having to show them” thing
Casey quickly tells Chuck to focus his eyes up front. And Chuck doesn’t have a very good comeback XD
Carina is back at her hotel (in an awesome outfit) and she walks right by Morgan. Awww, he even has flowers. He calls after her but apparently she doesn’t hear it, seeing as we cut right to her packing a bag in her room. She hears the insanely loud sound of tires screeching (really, Casey? How fast did you need to go once you were there) and sees Casey pull up.
She grabs her shit and books it for the elevator. And it’s either going to be Casey or Morgan waiting for her.
Sure enough
Ugh, she calls him Martin again. And, again, he doesn’t correct her. But! What’s this? Casey went through the stairwell. He’s got eyes on Carina…and a gun. She looks pretty damn panicked as Morgan talks to her. But not for long. She gives him a passionate kiss, slipping the diamond in his bag.
Yup. He’s a replicant
She pushes him into the elevator and tells him it won’t work out because she’s got an old relationship thing. He, very sweetly, offers an ear if she’d like to talk about it and a cup of coffee, but she just can’t. And the elevator doors close. Casey is ready, however, and he takes her back to her room, demanding to know where the diamond is. But she swears she doesn’t have it. He starts pulling out dresser drawers and she starts taking off clothes, telling him to search anywhere…but to start with her.
And he literally drops the drawers. Really?! Is that really what guys do when they’re holding something and see semi-naked women? Drop everything? Ugh.
Back at the Buy More, Sarah runs in to let Chuck know that it’s been an hour since Casey checked in so she’s going to the hotel herself. And puts on a random jacket she grabbed. She also tells Chuck that he’s benched for the night and they’ll have a talk later about him not finishing his broccoli what happened on the beach. Lester comes over to rub salt into the wound, thinking it’s relationship trouble.
Chuck drowns his sorrows in video games, Morgan by his side. He tells Morgan that they had a fight. And Morgan lies down on his bed, grape soda in hand. Chuck starts to talk about it, clearly upset, but mid-rant realizes that Morgan isn’t even listening, saying so. He apologizes, but yeah, he stopped listening when it wasn’t about Carina. He tells Chuck that she kissed him and then dumped him. And Chuck’s face is priceless.
Morgan finishes his soda and chucks it across the room. Chuck immediately asks if he’d like another. He would; he feels a bender coming on. Nicely done, Morgan. Chuck goes to get him one and Morgan tells Chuck that he has a new game in his bag; Chuck just needs to grab it. Just as Chuck is about to walk away, for the second time, Morgan asks him for some pizza (I love how Chuck stops short, sort of annoyed XD). No problemo (d’aw, he’s a good friend). Aaaaand again. Just as he’s out of the doorway, Morgan stops him again. And Chuck sounds pretty annoyed now XD
But Morgan assures him that even if their relationships don’t work out, it’s okay because they have each other. And the second the words leave his lips, he makes this face XD as though he knows how what he’s saying sounds. As if Morgan didn’t already know, Chuck tells him how sad that is. And Morgan agrees XD
Cut to Sarah picking the lock on Carina’s door. She bursts in, gun at the ready to find this lovely sight
Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!
She mocks Casey and even takes a picture XD while Casey says, “Very funny! What are you doing?!” through his gag. Back at Nerd Central, Chuck takes the game out of Morgan’s bag and finds another, smaller bag on top of it. Hmmm, look familiar, Chuckles? He takes the diamond out, freaking out slightly, and flashes (why didn’t he flash the first time he saw it?) And I think now he’s got the flash face down.
Chuck immediately says “he who owns the Nadani-Noor rules the world…” out loud and has a mini freak out as he bags the diamond. He immediately calls Sarah and starts rambling. Halfway through, he pauses, “…wait, you know this is Chuck, right?” XD
He keeps rambling and tells her that the diamond is NOT a drug diamond but it, in fact, belongs to an Afghani terrorist group. Sarah simply asks Chuck to find Carina and bring her the diamond. And we see that she’s surrounded by goons, being held at gunpoint by the wookie himself.
We come back to find Chuck, now with pizza and soda for his little buddy, holding the diamond as well. He yells to Morgan that he’s got to go ahead an-oh, boy.
If you can’t tell who this is from the eyes and mouth…you’re blind.
Chuck, very courageously, tells the intruder to take whatever they want; he keeps some cash in his sock drawer. But they mutely point at the diamond. Kind of like a caveman. But Chuck can’t give that up because it doesn’t belong to him. He bolts and CavemanNinja filps through the hall and down the staircase, blocking the door. Chuck looks at the plate and thinks fast. All I can say is, Xena would be proud.
The plate hits CaveNinja right in the face. She starts rubbing at it, saying “ow!” and Chuck finally pieces it together, identifying her. Carina speaks, taking off her mask, saying she only wore it so “Martin” wouldn’t ID her. She’s there for the diamond. But Chuck, being Chuck, tries to convince her to go help Sarah. But Carina insists that she can handle herself. Chuck is horrified and disappointed. Carina fills him in on the spy world: everyone is in it for them selves.
But Chuck assures Carina that’s not what Sarah does. And-and-and (I love the stammer, ‘not gonna’ lie) if she would have thought that in Pakistan, then Carina wouldn’t be alive to have that conversation with him. Nice one, Chuck. And Carina’s reaction says it all.
You know, for a model, she’s a really good actress
Chuck hands over the diamond. But, with or without Carina, he’s going to go help Sarah. Chuck, you have redeemed yourself. This is pretty awesome. Carina caves and gives him back the diamond. Looks like he convinced her! Morgan yells about his pizza and Chuck tells him he has to get more. And his soda is on the kitchen floor XD
Meanwhile, Peyman is cuffing Sarah and being all “you don’t know who you’re dealing with” like he’s scary and intimidating. Oh, wait. Turns out, he was holding the diamond for a friend of his. I have to say, Sarah looks pretty calm right now. Points for her. And she’s being snarky. I’m starting to like her. As they take her away, Peyman tells the guy whom Casey punched before to keep an eye on him (he’s still stuck on the bed…in boxers that have clovers on ‘em XD). He inhales deeply from his cigar and blows it right in Casey’s face.
Over with team Cici (Chuck, Carina, “C” and”C”), Carina is picking a weapon and asking Chuck why he’s helping; she thought he and Sarah were still fighting. But Chuck just has to get used to how much spies have to lie about their lives. Carina’s probably only half-listening though, seeing as her only response is that she’s feeling like a knife fight.
Oh, wait, she was. Turns out field agents have it tougher than analysts…or assets (but Carina doesn’t know that); they shed identities as often as normal people shed clothes. Chuck quips that in Carina’s case, that’s quite often. Oh, Chuck, I love you.
But the whole point of this conversation is that spies can’t tell anywhere who they really are. They may have to leave them in five minutes…or shoot them in the head. And Carina assures him that that goes for all spies; it doesn’t matter who you are. As they enter the hotel, Carina gives the diamond to Chuck. Oh, and if they make it out alive, she wants to fuck him. And Chuck walks into a plant XD But Chuck is kind of stuck on the whole making it out alive part.
Over with Clovers McGee, he’s trying and trying to get his hands free as the sound of a toilet bowl flushing is heard off screen. And HOLY SHIT. He breaks the friggin’ headboard! Jesus, this man is the Hulk. He sits up and readies the board. Sure enough. When CigarThug comes out of the can, Casey smashes his face with the board. And makes a joke about smoking. Let’s just say, his first “joke” was funnier.
Team Cici meets up with Peyman, Sarah, and his goons. Peyman asks if they have what he wants. Carina says “maybe” while Chuck…Chuck does this
XD!
And she makes a bad joke too (uuugggh). But Peyman isn’t in the mood. He cocks his gun, causing Chuck to become much more nervous. Sarah wonders aloud why Carina has to provoke people. Peyman asks for the diamond again and no one moves. Finally, Chuck caves and tells them he has it, going so far as to take it out of the bag and show everyone.
Peyman asks for it but Carina says no. Chuck is pretty sure this is the part where they do what he says though. Carina smacks the diamond out of his hand and catches it. After all, Peyman didn’t say please. If he really wants it, he’ll have to take it from her. But he “reveals” (I put it in quotes ‘cause I thought we were supposed to know that from the get-go) that everyone else in the lobby is with him. And Chuck looks shocked as he sees all the goons around them. Peyman asks if she plans to fight them all by herself.
But she’s not by herself (go Sarah). Then Carina whips out the Swedish (it is Mini’s native country) and Sarah responds in Polish (Yvonne’s, surprisingly). Carina shoves Chuck backwards and she and Sarah start kicking some goon ass. While Chuck hides under a table XD But he manages to get a hold of the diamond.
Meanwhile, Casey is on his way downstairs, via the elevator. And there’s a mother and daughter in there with him XD He just smiles and says hello. Oh, and he’s got pants now.
Back to the ass kickery! Sarah gets an awesome hit in while Chuck scurries off to the hotel’s Business Center. While Sarah and Carina continue to kick all kinds of booty, Chuck locks the door just as a goon rams into it. He starts screaming that he has to hide the diamond. And as the bad guy beats down the door, he…prints out a shipping label. Ahaha, I see where this is going. Smart man, Chuck.
Chuck unfolds a FedEx box and throws the diamond in, packing and labeling it. And he’s struggling with it, much to my enjoyment. Finally, the goon beats the door down, only to find Chuck, holding the package just over the slot to send it to the mailroom. Chuck threatens to drop the package and since neither of them know where it will end up, that’s not something the goon wants to happen. The goon steps back but Chuck doesn’t really know what to do now…good thing Casey is there, board at the ready. He knocks the goon out cold, surprising Chuck in the process.
And Chuck drops the package. I’ll just let the caps speak for themselves.
This episode needs more moments like this ♥
We come back from commercial to an awesome song and General Beckman and Graham telling the team that now all of the evilness in the world is gone. Well, that’s the gist. From one diamond. Whatever. And Chuck and Sarah look pretty damn pleased with themselves, especially Chuck. Casey manages to just curl the corners of his lips up but for him, that’s grinning like the Chesire Cat.
As Graham finishes up his spiel…oh? What’s this? A FedEx courier arrives. Chuck immediately pales. And I start chuckling as Graham shakes the box around, the diamond clearly inside.
As Carina is getting ready to leave our team, all standing in the courtyard, she tells them she had fun. Casey tells her he never wants to work with her again XD But she hopes next time they can shake it up a bit, pull the four-leaf clovers out of the rotation. Casey just laughs and heads off. Sarah and Carina hug while Carina, again, rips on her frenemy’s cover life. But Sarah is happy.
She asks Chuck if he wants to talk that night over dinner. He’ll bring pizza (man, these people love their pizza). He’s barely said goodbye and Carina is right behind him, once again asking for a fuck. And he goes into rabbit mode, complete with tie fiddling (he is the very definition of endearing). He’s flattered and…intimidated, but why him?
Well, he’s sort of cute-ish (as Carina puts it) but the real reason? She loves taking what Sarah wants. But Chuck assures her that Sarah does not want him. Carina tells him that Sarah “probably doesn’t even know it herself yet” (has this writer only ever written soaps before? O_o) but Carina does. And with that, she leaves. And the smallest hint of a smile plays across Chuck’s features.
That night, Chuck goes to Sarah’s hotel room, pizza in hand, no olives. It’s the only real thing he knows about her - she doesn’t like olives. He apologizes for the beach, he shouldn’t let his feelings affect the mission. And, as for her and Bryce, well, it makes sense. He always got the great girls. Okay, you know what. I can’t even…this scene, Zac’s delivery, Yvonne’s reactions…I’m just going to link to it.
I can't embed it but it is so worth clicking
What is there to say? Clearly, Ali Adler’s (this episode’s writer) strong point is emotional moments because that was…well, that was probably one of the top three scenes of the whole damn episode, and one of the top ten of the show thus far. Unfortunately…
Well. This episode was up and down for me. It started off so strongly but then quickly we were whisked off to Cliche Land. I liked the main plot but I have to say that Carina…well, she wasn’t my favorite character. She was there to be looked at and to throw a wrench in the budding romance between Chuck and Sarah, all while spouting strong, powerful woman cliches left and right. And she was there to show what Sarah probably was like before her current mission, hence the over-the-top cold and detached attitude towards spying. I get that that's what certain characters are for, but I don't think that's all they should be there for; they should be fleshed out, 3D people as well. The action sequences were great but the majority of the jokes fell pretty flat. Chuck was immature as hell during the mission and quite a few plot points and character actions felt forced. I know I’m going to get flamed for saying this but, I liked this episode less than Helicopter. It wasn't terrible but it was mediocre by the standards Chuck has shown thus far.
Overall, Wookie gets a 6 out of 10.
But what did you think?
Rate each episode at Chuck Versus the Fans!