Fresh Meat
Basics
Name: Annsley Kesten
Age: 16
Geographical Location: Rural Hell Ontario, Canada.
Astrological Sign: Taurus
Occupation: I train horses, which occupies most of the available working time. The shitty part is that I don't even get paid unless I want to lose my amateur status. Bastards.
Stuff
Three Turn Ons: Guys who are good with kids, Irish accents, (tasteful) black eyeliner on men - it CAN be done.
Three Turn Offs: Clingyness, too much aftershave, and mullets.
Who is the Supreme Overlord of the Universe? Drea.
Pet Peeve(s): People with annoying catch phrases, such as "Super!", and people who overuse words such as "like". I am often compelled to, like, strangle the hell out of them.
Interesting and UNIQUE fact about yourself:
The name Annsley started from some guy in the 1100's named John Ansley or something like that. Anyways, it's a family name and we have a massive book of all the recorded Annsley's with variable spellings of course. I've never met or heard of another Annsley (not Ainsley, which is completely different than mine). I actually don't know if that would make it unique, considering that hundreds of other people with a name like mine have obviously existed in our family. Oh well.
Link us directly to your promotion (not just the community name. If you advertise in a community that doesn't allow it, you will be automatically rejected and banned):
Bam.
How did you hear about us (please put the individual user's sn or the word you searched for to find us)?:
On one of my old journals awhile back, an anonymous poster told me to join this community after I posted something seemingly bitchy in my journal (link). Perhaps it was the general catlike bitchiness I am drawn to in this community, but for some reason, I've been visiting off and on ever since.
Make us laugh (picture or text):
More In Depth...
Why are you applying here?
I take pride in defacing and otherwise tearing others to shreds for my own personal enjoyment, but I figure that in this community, I will not only get to do it for my own vindication, but for the benefit of others as well. And really, where else do you get opportunities to do that? Apart from prison. Exactly.
Do you prefer to ride the pole or poke the hole?
Ride the pole - The Boyfriend states that I get this from my horseback riding upbringing.
Which of the pictures that you submitted do you like the best/least and why?
I like the second picture the best, because my hair looks tame which really doesn't seem to happen these days, and my least favourite is probably the sixth one, because I resemble a bit of a vampire and I'm doing my zoned-out routine.
What's your best feature? What's your worst?
Best feature is my hair, even though the mass volumes of it suggests that I'd probably be better off chopping it. My worst feature is my nose; I hate it, but when you really boil down to it, at least it's slightly better than MJ's. And also, less white.
What are your stances on pornography, ebonics, and karaoke?
I can't stand people who criticize pornography because it "defaces women". The only time I find that a legitimate excuse is when women are forced to be photographed or videotaped. In any other case, most people make damn good money doing it and it's their own choice about whether or not they're "defacing" themselves, if they even believe they are in the first place. And besides that, there's always male porn, and nobody gives a flying fuck about defacing men. Feminists piss me off sometimes. Anyhow, porno and I get along. If I don't like it, I don't watch it.
I think Ebonics iz uh pimp-tight way ta promote black culture in da big North America. w0rd to da lesser educated!
Karaoke is a big yes, especially when piss drunk. However, I believe that karaoke lost a lot of its fun when American Idol (or for those of us in igloos, Canadian Idol) exploded and now everyone who steps up to the mike has to be damn good or they get annhilated. I miss the old shitty voice days, really.
If you could be completely immune from one criminal law, which law would it be and why? How would you exercise this extra freedom?
That whole "no one is subject to meaningless destruction of their own property" crap. The way I see it, if you provoke someone to destroy or damage your stuff, you probably deserve it. Man, I'd destroy the shit out of my ex's car if his dad weren't a cop, and break all the windows in my house, because I'm angry that way.
Assuming you're rejected, will you complain and cry like a little pussy and delete your application?
No. Will you?
If you were allowed a threesome opportunity with any two Stamped Members, who would you choose and why? (please select one male and one female)
slashypoo because he's insanely hot and he's the only guy I've seen with those size earrings that actually look good, and wutchaseeisme because I have a bit of a red hair fetish and I am also obsessive about green eyes.. and she's fucking gorgeous, dammit.
What two members should be buried in a shallow grave near a pig farm, and why? (again, please choose a male and a female)
thefalloficarus - stop biting your finger and would it fucking kill you to smile? Also, please, please, please use an eyebrow pencil. Please. popjunky - even though I liked your application.. the guitar is doing it's best to up your hotness factor, but really, it can only do so much.
Pretend you were lucky enough to be accepted and choose any Stamped Member's application to judge. Your comments should be made here, not on their original application. Make sure you tell us who you're judging. (hint: this is your chance to be bitchy.)
cupofteaaa: First of all - GRAMMAR. It looks like you vomited all over your application. Let me introduce you to your new friend, apostrophe. Hi! I'm used to indicate the omission of a letter or letters from a word, the possessive case, or the plurals of numbers, letters, and abbreviations! Also, citing cheerleading cheers as a reason for you to be accepted really makes you come off more as a ditz and less as a smartass (which is, you know, desirable in this case). Show Girls is a shitty movie, and until now I thought that was universally agreed upon. Finally, I really don't understand how coming off as cute, nice and "hi, I work at Abercrombie!" was a good theme considering you are trying to get accepted into a uniform bitch community. Oh, and in photo #6, what the hell happened to you? Did you turn into an axe-bearing vampire batwoman? When I saw it, whatever was left of my childhood screamed and took off running.
Explain to us precisely why you are not an incredibly vacuous, positively ignorant excuse for a human being. (cite specific sources if available)
When I was five, I dressed up like a pirate for halloween and stole $160 out of the wallets in the back pockets of all my relatives. This display of character at such a young age shows just how crafty and purposeful (and therefore un-vacuous) I really am. Any attempt I make at explaining why I'm not ignorant will just make me seem ignorant, so I'll sum it all up with what I said yesterday to my friend Ryan while trying to escape a substantial group of obese people slowly surrounding us in a convenient store: "The real question here is: more room, or less shade?" Ignorance is bliss. Just ask Bush.
If beautyandbitch gave you $5000, what would you do with it?
Stockpile huge vats of gasoline and sell it later when the gas prices triple what they already are.
Pictures:
(Apologies for the general shittiness of my webcam.)
.. I like my juice ..
Not really a photo of me at all, but this is me and my horse Safuur showing in Kentucky. (Plus, I rather liked the angle of my ass.)
