Fic: Let The Light In (The Eagle, AU), Chapter 12
Title: Let The Light In, Chapter 12
Pairing: Esca/Marcus
Rating: NC-17
Length: 6.5k
Warnings:
Summary: Marcus and Esca are acrobats performing in a Vegas circus spectacular, and Marcus is trying to figure out what's happening between them.
This used to be fun. He'd always managed to lose himself dancing in a club, letting the music and his body take over, everyone else on the floor feeling it. They'd all be connected for a few moments where nothing else mattered, but he'd strained his shoulder during the moving adagio and the kiss, and his knee was struggling with three solid months of performances. Marcus knew he should be back at his place, icing them both before trying to get some sleep. Not here, listening to an increasingly-drunk Esca getting belligerent with Cas, and watching a bunch of other people on the dance floor losing themselves like he'd once found so easy. He plucked the leg of Esca's sweats,
“We should dance.”
“Can't. Too busy explaining to Cas how wrong he is.”
“Whatevs, brah. I'm not wrong. You can't legislate belief.”
“That's not what I even said!” Esca made a defeated grunt and drained the last of his vodka before thrusting his empty glass at Marcus. “Make yourself useful. Another double.”
“The waitress'll be back any second. Come dance with me.”
“I don't dance. Go dance with Jen, I'm busy.”
Jenna was fun but Marcus was tiring fast, and he couldn't escape into it like he'd always done before. His shoulder and leg kept bitching at him. Her blonde ponytail kept smacking him in the face as she swung her head around, and her perfume was too strong, too sweet. His shitty mood wasn't helping. He could feel the exact place where Esca was sitting behind him, over by the booths, a spark of lightning marked out in the darkness of some internal map.
“He's watching.” Jenna started a series of full body-rolls back against him, and Marcus automatically held onto her hips to grind against her butt.
“What? Who?”
“Esca. He's watching us dance. Slap my ass.”
Aw, hell. He'd been dancing with his back to Esca so he could have a break from brooding over the whole thing. “You talked to Nattie.”
“She's worried about you.”
“She worries about everybody.” And has a big mouth. “Doesn't matter, it's your birthday. You get anything good?”
“Oh, y'know, earrings, margarita glasses, buncha stuff. So you're falling for him? Nattie thinks so. I mean, like, whoa, for real nobody saw that happening.”
She was drunk. It was her birthday, she should be, so Marcus tamped down his irritation.
“I'm not - ” There was no point. Nobody wanted to listen. “Let's just dance.”
He pulled Jenna's arms around his neck and she jumped, her legs going around his hips as she laughed, throwing her head side to side. “He's still watching. Ooh, Ears looks pissed. You're going to get a spanking later.”
“C'mon, Jen. Quit it. Tell me what's going on with you, birthday girl?”
“My birthday is what's going on! Woo! Twenty-fucking-five, bizitches!”
Before the accident, Jen throwing her arms up and leaning backwards like that wouldn't have surprised him, and the movement necessary to support her and work with it would've come naturally, just another part of the dance. Before tonight's performance he probably could've figured something out, but a jab of discomfort from his strained shoulder forced Marcus's move to support the small of her back slightly out of place, so he stepped forwards for balance on a knee that wasn't there.
It had happened before. Not for some time, and not as dramatically as this, crashing to the floor with Jenna coming shrieking down on top of him, a circle of concerned faces crowding around them both as a hot slither of something wrong sliced its way up his thigh. Jenna struggled off him, her hands grabbing at his shirt, everyone asking if he was okay, all the dancer friends he'd once felt so close to, Nattie, Noz even. No Esca. Marcus scanned the crowd around him as he started to get to his feet, or foot, his knee refusing to engage. He shouldn't feel shitty that Esca wasn't one of the worried faces. Esca probably hadn't noticed, too busy mid-rant with Cas.
“That was fucking idiotic. Serves you right.” A calloused hand closed firmly around his out of the crowd and pulled him up, Esca moving in close to hug against Marcus's torso, placing Marcus's arm around his shoulders. “Can you put any weight on it?”
“Not yet. Need to ice it first, firm it up.” Marcus's hand tightened on Esca's shoulder because he was grateful for the support. No other reason.
“Chrissakes, knob-end. Come on.”
He'd brought the party to a temporary close. The DJ had turned the music down, everyone coming up to kiss and hug goodbye, the dark cloud of Esca's mood increasing with every delay. The short cab ride back to Esca's place was mostly silent, Esca's temper obviously brewing as he stared out the window. It felt like he was sitting somewhere else entirely, in a different car, a different city. Marcus tried to rub some life back into his knee and to stretch out his shoulder.
“This happens. It's not serious.”
“No? You haven't fucked up the act? Forgive me if I'm unconvinced.”
“I need to rest it, that's it. I can go back to my place.”
“Because dragging that leg up two flights of stairs is going to be absolutely the best fucking thing for it in its current state?” Esca glared out of his window some more. “Hardly.”
Marcus wanted to reach out and touch Esca's thigh, his arm, something to reassure him, but the poisonous cloud of barely-suppressed anger pouring off Esca persuaded him against it. “It'll be okay. If I ice it and rest up tomorrow, I should be okay for tomorrow's show. Shouldn't even need physio.”
Esca's lips thinned. “Does it hurt? I hope so.”
“Hah, no. Nothing too bad. I'm sorry if I got you worried. About the act.”
“It's not that I mind you practically humping Jen on the dance floor, because that's your fucking business, but don't risk my career while you're at it. Wear your leg brace next time.”
So Esca had been watching them. “It's my career, too. Don't think I'm not aware of that.”
“Leave it. We'll talk once we're home.”
He had to rely on Esca to get him into the apartment, leaning on that compact, athletic frame as they moved him together over to the couch where he'd once spent a month of nights tied up in knots of sexual frustration over that body and all its concentrated energy. He'd lain awake for hours trying to figure out exactly what it was about Esca that attracted him so profoundly. It was like being dragged under water by a riptide, and the harder he'd fought against it, the more inevitable it became. He'd never liked feeling out of control, but had no idea where this undertow was taking him. Under water. He looked at Esca as Esca came back over, and felt scared for a second like he was starting to drown.
“Here.” Gently, almost tenderly, Esca propped Marcus's weak knee up where he was lying on the couch, pushing a cushion beneath it, placing an ice pack either side of what remained of Marcus's knee cap. “You're sure this'll do it?”
“Yeah. Thanks.”
“Eh, no problem. Take your shirt off.”
“Now? What . . .” Esca started tugging Marcus's shirt up over his head, making him laugh. “Okay. Well, I'm not going to say no, but I'm not going to be able to do much.”
“Fuckssake, stop thinking with your prick for five fucking minutes. Your shoulder's been bugging you since the show.” Seemed like Esca'd been keeping a close eye on him. Marcus hadn't said a word. “How did you manage to balls that one up?”
“It's nothing. Strained my traps a little on the moving balance.”
“You should've said. Budge up.”
Esca squeezed into a small space between Marcus's ass and the arm of the couch, one leg tucking in against Marcus's hip, rough hands warm on Marcus's shoulder as he started to dig his fingers in. Marcus moaned, letting his head fall forward into a stretch. “Hey, ease off.”
“Need to get into the deep tissue.”
The agile fingers that had stroked and tugged him to climax a hundred times felt like thin knives stabbing into his skin, relentlessly strong, thumbs moving with crushing force into the muscle. “Seriously. Ow.”
“Pussy. Grow a pair.”
“Is this a punishment or something?”
“No.” The soft rush of damp air that was Esca's sigh against the back of his neck made the hairs there stand on end. “It's necessity. I rely on you and your shoulders and your leg. I'd have brained myself on the stage that time if it wasn't for them.”
“You'd have dislocated a shoulder, max. It wasn't that big a deal. Rake of the stage throws it off.”
“Either way, I need you in full working order. Which is why I've figured out I owe you an apology.” The fingers dug deeper and more painfully, like Esca couldn't say he was sorry for anything without exacting some revenge. “Same way I rely on you, I know you do on me, on my balance. I shouldn't have gone off with Mads that time and got so stoned before a show. It was out of order.”
“I don't need you to apologize so long as you're not planning to do it again.”
“I'm not.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
They fell silent except for Marcus's grunts of pain as Esca worked his muscle until the whole shoulder felt like a bruise. Then Esca's hands stroked over his skin a few times before Esca surprised Marcus by putting his arms around him from behind, a slight hug, palms flat against his bare chest, Esca's forehead against his neck.
“I'm sorry it's got all complicated. Because it has and there's no point pretending it hasn't. I don't know how much of that's me, but I'm sorry.”
Marcus took hold of Esca's hands with his own, holding Esca into the hug. “It's not you. It's my fault. I didn't think I'd be this into you.”
“Thanks a fucking bundle.”
Marcus allowed Esca to pull him backwards until he was lying against Esca's stomach, hanging onto Esca's wrists like a lifeline. He stroked over them with his thumbs, liking the feel of Esca's arms around him like this too much, the angry throbbing of his shoulder and his aching knee almost forgotten as he closed his eyes and let himself go with it. There was every chance it wouldn't happen again. He was planning to enjoy it while it lasted.
“Righto.” Esca patted both hands against Marcus's chest dismissively. “That's your lot. Lemme up.”
It hadn't been long enough, barely thirty seconds. Marcus held onto Esca's wrists with more strength. “I'm comfortable.”
“And I'm thirsty and working my way up to a lengthy pee, so . . .” Esca started wriggling his way out from behind Marcus. “C'mon, fatty, shift your bum.”
“No.” His shoulder protested as he reached out to haul Esca back, but Marcus held on firm. Making a decision, taking action where he'd been paralyzed before. “Get your skinny butt back over here.”
“Fuck, no. No cuddling.”
Esca looked sulky, his cheeks pink, mouth pouty. It was cute as shit, and Marcus couldn't stop smiling up at him.“I like cuddling.”
“You like cuddling? I don't. MacCunovals aren't cuddlers.” Esca watched Marcus shifting over on the couch to make room, eyes narrowed, expression sour. “Just my luck, finding the one straight guy in the world who wants to fucking snuggle.”
Marcus patted the couch with the hand that wasn't holding Esca in place. “I know you didn't believe me before, but I think we've proved conclusively between us that I'm not altogether straight. Five minutes.”
“It'll complicate everything way more.”
“Chickenshit. It's only a cuddle.” He patted the couch again. “You can time it.”
“I will time it.”
“Go for it.”
“You think I won't?” Esca raised an eyebrow at him, pulling his phone out of his pants pocket to set an alarm. “Not a second longer, and it doesn't mean anything.”
“C'mon, clock's ticking. Sit your ass down.”
They didn't fit on the couch together correctly at first. Marcus had to shift backwards more, losing the ice packs in the process and having to reach down to put them back in place as Esca eased himself into a prone position beside him. Esca was rigid as a pole, limbs held inflexibly against Marcus, his head tucking awkwardly underneath Marcus's chin as he lay down against Marcus's naked chest like he was going to his execution. But Marcus wrapped his arms around Esca anyway, moving around silently until they fitted right. He'd been told before by exes and female friends that he was great at hugs, so was going to work every ounce of skill he had. It might not be romancing the shit out of anybody, but he could at least cuddle the fuck out of Esca while he had the chance.
It took a full minute before Esca relaxed into it, his inflexible pose slowly starting to sculpt itself to Marcus's body, the hand against his chest flattening into a touch. Marcus nuzzled into Esca's hair, smelling the shampoo from Esca's post-show shower along with that indefinable warmth of Esca's personal scent. His whole body felt lit up with a golden glow, his dick half-hard, his heart thumping heavy in his chest. “There we go.”
“Mm.”
“You like it. There's no shame in admitting it.”
“Bugger off.”
But Esca's arm went around him, Esca's face pressing into his chest that little bit tighter, and Esca's knee knocked the ice packs out the way as it moved between Marcus's legs. Esca's fingers splayed against the bare skin of his back, and Marcus was certain he felt Esca's lips brushing against his chest in the faintest shadow of a kiss. He was starting to feel drunk on it, head and heart swamped with gratitude towards the figure in his arms and a mess of other emotion, welling up so fast it made his eyes smart. He'd felt like his life had been over when he met Esca. Difficult to believe how much everything had changed since. Esca's hand stroking around to his chest drew Marcus's attention back, fingers starting to slide down towards his waistband as Esca started to rut gently against his thigh.
“Nu-uh, no, that's not what we're doing. No fooling around.”
“You've got to be fucking kidding me.” It was muttered hotly against the base of his throat.
“Five minutes. Plus I have to ice my knee more after.”
“So I'm just supposed to lie here for nothing? Christ.”
“I'm sorry.” Marcus patted Esca's back in fake sympathy. “It's torture.”
“I should hate you. I do.”
“Yeah, I know.”
Only a few minutes left to enjoy, but it felt to Marcus like a moment out of time, the couch and the two of them in a bubble separate from the rest of reality. They fit together so perfectly, Esca's body an ideal mix of heft and delicacy. His solidity was almost anchoring Marcus down. Something to hold onto. A lifeline, and he wasn't drowning any longer. Esca's shirt was old, washed soft, a contrast to the slight scratch of a few hours' stubble. His chest was rising and falling softly against Marcus's, his breath warm at Marcus's throat, his heart thudding against the bottom of Marcus's ribcage. Marcus took a long breath in through his nose to fill his lungs with Esca's scent. The seconds were counting down. He didn't want it to end, and he knew then that he didn't want any of it to end. Him, Esca, the dynamic that had developed between them. The sex, sure, but not only the sex.
“Fucking thing.”
The alarm on Esca's phone started trilling, a blanket of cooler air moving across Marcus's bare skin as Esca pulled away, taking all his warmth with him. But after picking his phone up and swiping the alarm off, Esca startled Marcus by tossing his phone back onto the coffee table, settling back against Marcus's chest without complaint.
“You understand why I'm apprehensive.”
It was a flat statement, said in a monotone into his neck. Marcus started rubbing his hand back and forth along Esca's shoulder, trying to encourage him. “Yeah.”
“I mean, even if you were gay, it doesn't automatically follow that you wouldn't chuck me for someone else. If anything, it'd be the opposite. I can't keep blaming everything on your former heterosexuality. Such as it was.”
“I hope not.”
“The thing that scares me, though . . .” Esca trailed off, so Marcus waited, letting his hand rest in the nape of Esca's neck. Then Esca shifted, ducking his head down and pressing his face into the center of Marcus's chest. “Well, worries me, not scares, exactly. The thing is - here's the thing.”
Waiting some more, Marcus hoped his patience would pay off. If he interrupted now he'd probably say the wrong thing and have Esca springing up, throwing a bellyful of sneering contempt his way before storming off towards the bedroom and leaving him there.
“When Bastien fucked off, it wasn't just a heartbreak thing. See, we only had a little act in this tiny circus, sideshow weirdness stuff, no money really, but it was kind of like a family and it was the first time I'd felt settled. I didn't want to be anywhere else. Everything was working out, y'know? Then the rug gets pulled out from under me and I'm left there, nothing to offer, rent I couldn't pay, shit of an ex-boyfriend farting off over the far horizon. I've been on my own since. Figured it was easier that way.”
Marcus pressed a kiss against the top of Esca's head in silent support as Esca hugged into him closer.
“Then you come along, and you're lovely, you big wanker. Perfectly lovely. Ruining everything. Making me get all 'no man is an island'. I mean, how fucking dare you.”
“I'm lovely?”
“No.”
Marcus grinned into Esca's hair, aware he was probably screwing this up but unable to stop himself. “You think I'm lovely.”
“Not anymore. Consider it a temporary loss of concentration, nothing else.” But then Esca's head came up, bumping Marcus's nose, and his face was flushed, his eyes dull with concern. “But you need to understand that doing anything other than the hot and nasty with you is a huge step for me, because I'm worried I like you too much already. I never liked Bastien that much and he still managed to fuck me up good and proper.”
Lifting a hand, Marcus ran a knuckle across Esca's cheekbone, letting his fingers find their natural path along Esca's jaw. “I'm not him. I'm lovely, remember?”
“When you're not annoying the piss out of me.” Esca tilted his head into Marcus's hand, closing his eyes. “Sometimes. And I don't generally like people much, so my ability to more or less tolerate you for long periods of time has been something of a surprise, to be perfectly honest.”
“Esca?”
The eyes remained closed, mouth opening slightly as he traced its upper line with his thumb. “What?”
“Sometimes you talk way too much.”
He'd had this man's cock in his mouth, experienced how it had pulsed with every heartbeat, discovered every texture, tasted how good he'd been making it feel. It hadn't been half as intimate as this kiss, their first in private for too long and the first that wasn't a prelude to something else. Agonizingly slow, Marcus palming Esca's neck as two hands cupped his face and drew him into it deeper, laying him wide open. It was the type of kiss people wrote songs about. Esca moved to lay mostly on top of him, kissing Marcus with a generosity and restraint that had none of his usual hunger or forceful need, and Marcus knew he was in serious trouble. Shit creek, no paddle. Esca broke away, rubbing his nose against Marcus's, his lips brushing Marcus's mouth as he spoke.
“C'mon. Bedroom.”
“Shit. I'm sorry. I want to, hell, I really want to, but if I don't ice my knee -”
“Will you shush?” Another brief kiss. “I'll tape up your knee, we can strap the ice packs on, then sleep. Once I've pissed for Britain, because I swear my bladder's twice the size of my head right now, I might, might, allow another five minutes' cuddling before I crash.”
“You want to sleep with me?”
Esca grinned. It didn't happen often enough. “I know. Bit kinky, isn't it?”
Perhaps it was going to take them awhile to get used to this. The same perfect fit didn't happen immediately once they'd managed to settle into Esca's big bed together, a slightly funky smell signaling to Marcus that the sheets hadn't been changed since he'd moved. They both had to shift around, directing arms around behind heads and navigating them into chests, a stray tuft of Esca's hair making its way up Marcus's nose and making him sneeze fully into Esca's disgusted face. But finally they settled in, both in their briefs, Marcus's knee heavily strapped up with Esca's leg thrown over it. Esca had found a space tucked into Marcus's armpit, head under his chin, fingers splayed across his chest, but it took some time for Esca to let his tension go, muscles and tendons slowly loosening.
“I'm glad we're doing this.” Marcus tickled his fingertips in circles on Esca's bare back, earning himself a satisfied sigh.
“It's good you think you know what we're doing, because I've got no sodding idea at all.”
“We'll figure something out.”
“Fuck knows what.” Esca gave Marcus's chest a quick nuzzle, next to his armpit. “'Night, then, Snuggles.”
“You love the cuddling. You're so obvious.”
“I'm willing to endure it. There's a difference.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. 'Night.”
Lying there, feeling sated like he'd eaten a huge meal, maybe a sixteen-ounce t-bone in mushroom sauce with mashed potatoes and buttered green beans with some kind of pie for after, Marcus could sense Esca gradually releasing himself into sleep. A twitch of a foot against his leg first, an unconscious movement of Esca's head closer into Marcus's neck. Hand flexing over his heart, breath coming faster and more shallow. A murmur of something Marcus couldn't make out, a grunt as Esca's body gave an involuntary lurch, then the softest of snores.
Marcus smiled to himself and turned onto his side towards Esca, wrapping an arm around this person who had changed everything, the warm body against his burrowing in closer. Tomorrow he'd probably wake to find Esca sprawled over the far side of the bed as usual, and Marcus would get bitched out for having to rest his leg all day, and get called fat, lazy, a mixture of both. Everything would be the same as before in a totally different world. He should probably feel way more concerned about than he did.
-
“Shit! Shit shit shitting fuck buggery wanking shitting thing!”
Marcus slowly dragged himself into consciousness from dreams of climbing a dusty set of shelves, finding himself lying on his belly, head halfway under his pillow. What angel wakes me from my flowery bed? He raised his head to rub over his hair and to locate Esca, who was standing in the bathroom apparently trying to beat the crap out of his bathtub with a towel. “I think it's dead.”
“What?”
“You killed it. Whatever it was.”
“Oh.” Esca looked down at his towel. “'Morning. Sorry. Didn't mean to wake you.”
“Hm. What was it? Spider?”
“No. Stupid fucking tub's broken. I can't get a single jet working.”
“Call a plumber.” Marcus lay back, stretching his neck, resting his head on his arm. Too comfortable to get up yet.
“Which would cost something ridiculous.”
“So take a shower. Or a regular bath.”
“Well, here's the thing.” Oh, Lord. Esca's tone had dropped into that familiar note of venom, his hands on his hips as he glared at the tub, then over at Marcus. “I wake up and you're snoring your arse off and taking up most of the bed, so I think, I know, I'll go have a nice wank lying in a bubbly bath, because that's relaxing, y'know? Because, frankly, bit of a stressful night last night with you being an arsehole and your stupid fucking leg. But, no, tub's still buggered and I can't even - what? What's that smirk for?”
“I guess this is progress.” Marcus had given Esca a sleepy smile. “You didn't run off to Mads' place this time.”
Esca's eyes narrowed to slits. “Tread lightly, Snuggles.”
Marcus sat up, unstrapping the warm ice packs from his knee and bending it a few times, feeling the usual click as the now-firmer tendon moved in its usual way beneath where Esca had taped it all up. No swelling to speak of, which was good. Esca was standing there in his briefs, thumbs hooked into his hips, his chest and stomach in immediate need of Marcus's hands stroking downwards to take those briefs with them, letting all the good stuff of Esca's pretty package tumble out. It was inspirational, and arousal had already warmed his balls into a dull throb, cock heavy.
“Leg's looking decent. We could probably do something, if we were careful . . .”
“I dunno.” The venom moved into petulant. “I've run the bath already.”
Marcus threw the sheet back, lying on his back and rubbing over his growing hard-on with the palm of his hand. “I shouldn't risk slipping in the tub.”
“Doing that's not going to work. I'm not in the mood.”
“No? Damn shame.”
He lifted his hips to pull his briefs down to his thighs, working his way out of them and to the bottom of the bed, cock lying flat and heavy against his stomach. Marcus knew he was a grower, but like this, freshly hard, he looked big-dicked, good and thick. Esca stood there frowning, watching him from underneath his eyebrows, a growing erection bowing out the front of his briefs as Marcus spread himself out on his back, sliding his hand down his chest to tug himself a few times. He'd always had a decent body but working with Esca had given him new bulk in his shoulders and chest, his abs nicely cut, lats hooded and tapering down to a taut waist and strong, flexible hips. He looked fucking hot naked, more than he had as a dancer. He wasn't certain he was irresistible, exactly, but it seemed like a good time to test the theory.
“Mm, feels good.” He spat into his hand and beat off more slowly, trying to make it porno as he licked his bottom lip and watched for Esca's reaction. “Been doing this a lot the last week.”
“Yeah.” Esca's voice had that husk to it, and he swallowed as he stared at Marcus's cock.
“Every morning, every night. Thinking about fucking you. Thinking about you blowing me.”
“Uh-huh.”
“I thought about blowing you, too.” Arousal was making Marcus braver, more immune to embarrassment. He reached down between his legs to cup and stroke his nuts. “Ended up jacking off sucking on my thumb like a dumbass.”
Esca's cheekbones were colored with slashes of red, the tip of his dick pushing out the elastic of his briefs. “I'm bigger than your fucking thumb, thanks ever so.”
“Then get it over here. Prove it.”
A blink of surprise. “You want to . . . ?”
“I'll endure it. C'mon, Esca. Unless you're still planning to take your bath.”
But Esca started kicking his way out of his briefs, his dick jutting in an upward curve that spoke of how turned on he was by Marcus's implied offer. His hand brushed Marcus's out of the way as he joined Marcus on the bed, starting to jack Marcus slow and tight as Marcus pulled him into a kiss. It was everything that last night's kiss hadn't been, hot, fast and wet, messy and loud, hands grabbing and teeth clashing. He'd missed this.
“How d'you want to do this?” Esca bit into Marcus's bottom lip, tugging at it with his teeth. “Sixty-nine?”
Marcus was ready to refuse, aware he'd never be able to concentrate on doing a good job with Esca's throat swallowing around his dick. Common sense intervened. “Hell, yes.”
“Awesome. Rest your leg, I'll move.”
Esca's flavor was stronger after a night's sleep, no less arousing but still a solid mouthful of 'there's a dick in my mouth' as Marcus fixed his lips around Esca's tip and laid his tongue against it. Esca already knew what to do with him, sliding his beautifully tight lips down around Marcus's length without effort as he lifted Marcus's nutsack to stroke, so Marcus did his best to copy Esca's actions. It was impossible to pay exact attention with that warm, wet mouth sucking him down, but whatever Marcus had managed to do, Esca seemed to like it, moaning softly around Marcus's cock.
Marcus's nuts were sensitive to every touch, which Esca had figured out right from the start, paying them a good amount of attention with his fingers and thumb. Marcus had never done that much with Esca's, so he scraped his fingers through the sparse, coarse hairs covering Esca's tight scrotum, reaching below to tickle over where he knew felt great on his. He'd worked more of Esca's dick into his mouth and tried sucking harder, Esca's hips jerking and a muffled moan around his length where it was buried in Esca's mouth. This was okay. No, it was hot as all get out, but tough to co-ordinate, anf Marcus couldn't thrust into Esca's mouth like he wanted to without forgetting about what he was doing with his mouth.
“Play with my bum.” Esca pulled off on a suck, mouthing the words against the head of Marcus's hard-on. “I'm not that bothered about my balls. It feels nice, but -”
“Sure, whatever's good.”
Marcus drooled onto his index finger, taking Esca's dick back into his mouth and trying to fit more of it in as he reached between Esca's legs to rub over the small knot of puckered skin that felt so good stretching around him. Esca groaned long on him, sucking harder with his fingers wrapped around Marcus's balls, his other hand on Marcus's ass cheek holding him close. Marcus worked the tip of his finger into the tight heat of Esca's asshole, feeling it crimp around him instantly, a stronger burst of flavor leaking over his tongue. Would he be able to swallow, if it happened?
“Relax.”
Sudden anxiety had straightened his spine as Esca's fingertips started to trace the line of his butt crack. His mouth must've tightened too much.
“I'm not planning on stuffing my hand up there. Holy fuck,” Esca started laughing, his breath gusting against Marcus's wilting dick. “It was a joke, I've never fisted anyone in my life.”
“Hilarious.”
“Aww. Think I scared him.”
Marcus looked down along the bed to Esca, Esca's dick knocking against his forehead, leaving a damp trail. “He's worried he wouldn't like it.”
“Then he needs to trust I've got his best interests at heart. Here, bend your knee. This is all I was planning to do. Nothing terrifying.”
Esca's mouth started to coax Marcus's cock into hardness again, the tip of his tongue teasing every sensitive spot as his fingers stroked up between Marcus's legs, between his ass cheeks. It felt tickly and weird. Marcus concentrated instead on working Esca's dick, pumping his head as he twisted his finger deeper into the tight, dry heat of Esca's ass. But then Esca's finger stroked slowly and deliberately over his butthole, and Marcus jerked, asshole in spasm, his dick hardening fully with a strong pulse of blood, balls drawing up.
“Hoh, hohh, that's - damn.”
Esca made an appreciative noise around Marcus's dick, then did it again, that one fingertip rubbing delicately over where nobody had touched before, extracting shivers of a skittish, wormy desire that shot through Marcus ass to nuts. His eyes closed, his mouth open, hands motionless against Esca's cock and ass. “Okay, yeah. That's . . . that's okay.”
“Then get back to work.”
“Oh. Sure.”
He never lasted long when Esca's mouth was on him, but needing to focus on Esca's cock and matching the movement of his head with the slow circular hip thrusts Esca was making kept his attention divided from where the combination of wet mouth and insistent finger had the climb already starting, sneaking into every muscle, every nerve ending. Esca's ass was clenching around his knuckle as Esca's grunts on his cock were getting louder, the flavor of Esca's arousal getting stronger, so Marcus pumped his head harder. There was no contest as there was no way in hell he'd last as long as Esca, given the disparity of skill involved, but he wanted to do a good job and the distraction of Esca's tongue was helping Marcus take Esca in deeper, to fixate less on what happened once a beej was taken to its logical conclusion.
“Close yet?”
“Yuh.” Marcus felt immersed in sex. Its taste all over his aching, spit-wet lips and tiring tongue, its salt stench deep in his nose. Tight and hot around his knuckle, radiating out from his over-sensitive asshole as Esca's finger played with it, itch building in the tip of his dick to transmit all the way down into the depths of his nuts. He was covered with it, Esca's nakedness pressed against his. He sucked harder, body tensing.
“Now?”
“Mnh . . .”
The movement of Esca's finger against his asshole had a direct route to his cock, like rubbing over a nipple just before climax only stronger, hotter, a route marked out in live current. Marcus sensed his body starting to quake with the strength of what was coming, then Esca's dry fingertip, lubed only with sweat, pushed into his butt a centimeter, sending a bolt of outraged stimulation to a system already on the edge of overload. Marcus gasped at the intensity, Esca's cock popping out of his mouth to rest against his cheek as Marcus bit his lip, closed his eyes and started to come with a low moan. It kept coming, a fresh jolt of pleasure every time his asshole clenched around the small, solid, aching fact of Esca's fingertip, the surging tip of his cock warming encased in Esca's throat, which was taking everything down, all that he had, so much of it.
“Whoa. Nice going, champ.” Esca stroked his asshole and dick slowly until the shivers set in, Marcus resting his head against Esca's thigh as he caught his breath. “So that worked.”
“Yeah.” Marcus forced his eyes open when Esca's body started shuddering beside him, the slap of Esca's hand on his dick inches from his face. “Hold up, I thought I'd finish . . .”
“No, you're alright. Take it easy.”
“C'mon, lie flat. If I can take a finger in my ass -”
“You don't get a medal. It was only my pinky.”
“- Then I can do this.”
He gripped Esca's cock by its base, holding it upward towards his mouth, its slit looking at him with every bit of beady intensity as its owner usually did. Esca's fingers ruffled his sweat-damp hair affectionately.
“You don't have to let me jizz in your mouth. It's not important.”
“I know.”
The last post-orgasm crackles were popping through his veins as Marcus fixed his lips around Esca again, starting to pump his head fast, trying to remember to suck every time he pulled off. He built up a rhythm, Esca moaning beneath him, hands cupped over both his ears, both his neck and shoulder starting to bitch about the work involved. It felt less awkward and unnatural than it had the first time. Maybe he could get used to this, only gagging a little when Esca thrust up too hard.
“Shit, sorry. You're good at it, oh, fuck you're so good at this.”
He'd never realized that learning to be a decent cocksucker would make him feel proud. Marcus liked making Esca feel this good, fingers sliding through his hair, hips hiking, curses starting to slur into an unintelligible mass of moans. The taste was getting stronger, saltier, Esca's dick feeling harder and thicker as Marcus managed to push his mouth down deeper, almost to the back of his tongue. He sucked hard, drawing deep and long, Esca's groan husky and wavering.
“Close, I'm, I'm . . . oh, shit, don't stop, I mean you should because I'm going to -” Esca was holding his breath, stomach clenched hard under Marcus's fingers. “You've got to move, I'm going to shoot.”
Marcus didn't have to make a decision. He wanted to taste how good he made Esca feel. It wasn't complicated. He pumped his head faster, sucked deeper, fingers tightening in his hair painfully a second before Esca shouted and it hit the back of Marcus's tongue. Not as warm as he'd expected, and there was too much dick in his mouth to taste much of anything. Not too bad, really, not as thick as his own, but then there was more, Esca cursing, his cock pulsing and there was more and more of it, everywhere, filling Marcus's mouth with a slippery salty-sweet bitterness that he started to swallow immediately just to get it out of his goddamn mouth.
“Oh! Oh, fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Oh, shit.”
Esca's hands were petting his face carelessly, fingers shaky. The bitterness was fast turning sour. “Good?”
“Very. Can't believe you did that. You big homo.”
Esca was looking down at him with a serene smile that was beautiful, his face flushed, hair clinging to his sweating forehead. Marcus wiped his mouth off with a handful of sheet, wondering if Esca would notice if he wiped his tongue, too.
“Now do I get a medal?”
Pairing: Esca/Marcus
Rating: NC-17
Length: 6.5k
Warnings:
Summary: Marcus and Esca are acrobats performing in a Vegas circus spectacular, and Marcus is trying to figure out what's happening between them.
This used to be fun. He'd always managed to lose himself dancing in a club, letting the music and his body take over, everyone else on the floor feeling it. They'd all be connected for a few moments where nothing else mattered, but he'd strained his shoulder during the moving adagio and the kiss, and his knee was struggling with three solid months of performances. Marcus knew he should be back at his place, icing them both before trying to get some sleep. Not here, listening to an increasingly-drunk Esca getting belligerent with Cas, and watching a bunch of other people on the dance floor losing themselves like he'd once found so easy. He plucked the leg of Esca's sweats,
“We should dance.”
“Can't. Too busy explaining to Cas how wrong he is.”
“Whatevs, brah. I'm not wrong. You can't legislate belief.”
“That's not what I even said!” Esca made a defeated grunt and drained the last of his vodka before thrusting his empty glass at Marcus. “Make yourself useful. Another double.”
“The waitress'll be back any second. Come dance with me.”
“I don't dance. Go dance with Jen, I'm busy.”
Jenna was fun but Marcus was tiring fast, and he couldn't escape into it like he'd always done before. His shoulder and leg kept bitching at him. Her blonde ponytail kept smacking him in the face as she swung her head around, and her perfume was too strong, too sweet. His shitty mood wasn't helping. He could feel the exact place where Esca was sitting behind him, over by the booths, a spark of lightning marked out in the darkness of some internal map.
“He's watching.” Jenna started a series of full body-rolls back against him, and Marcus automatically held onto her hips to grind against her butt.
“What? Who?”
“Esca. He's watching us dance. Slap my ass.”
Aw, hell. He'd been dancing with his back to Esca so he could have a break from brooding over the whole thing. “You talked to Nattie.”
“She's worried about you.”
“She worries about everybody.” And has a big mouth. “Doesn't matter, it's your birthday. You get anything good?”
“Oh, y'know, earrings, margarita glasses, buncha stuff. So you're falling for him? Nattie thinks so. I mean, like, whoa, for real nobody saw that happening.”
She was drunk. It was her birthday, she should be, so Marcus tamped down his irritation.
“I'm not - ” There was no point. Nobody wanted to listen. “Let's just dance.”
He pulled Jenna's arms around his neck and she jumped, her legs going around his hips as she laughed, throwing her head side to side. “He's still watching. Ooh, Ears looks pissed. You're going to get a spanking later.”
“C'mon, Jen. Quit it. Tell me what's going on with you, birthday girl?”
“My birthday is what's going on! Woo! Twenty-fucking-five, bizitches!”
Before the accident, Jen throwing her arms up and leaning backwards like that wouldn't have surprised him, and the movement necessary to support her and work with it would've come naturally, just another part of the dance. Before tonight's performance he probably could've figured something out, but a jab of discomfort from his strained shoulder forced Marcus's move to support the small of her back slightly out of place, so he stepped forwards for balance on a knee that wasn't there.
It had happened before. Not for some time, and not as dramatically as this, crashing to the floor with Jenna coming shrieking down on top of him, a circle of concerned faces crowding around them both as a hot slither of something wrong sliced its way up his thigh. Jenna struggled off him, her hands grabbing at his shirt, everyone asking if he was okay, all the dancer friends he'd once felt so close to, Nattie, Noz even. No Esca. Marcus scanned the crowd around him as he started to get to his feet, or foot, his knee refusing to engage. He shouldn't feel shitty that Esca wasn't one of the worried faces. Esca probably hadn't noticed, too busy mid-rant with Cas.
“That was fucking idiotic. Serves you right.” A calloused hand closed firmly around his out of the crowd and pulled him up, Esca moving in close to hug against Marcus's torso, placing Marcus's arm around his shoulders. “Can you put any weight on it?”
“Not yet. Need to ice it first, firm it up.” Marcus's hand tightened on Esca's shoulder because he was grateful for the support. No other reason.
“Chrissakes, knob-end. Come on.”
He'd brought the party to a temporary close. The DJ had turned the music down, everyone coming up to kiss and hug goodbye, the dark cloud of Esca's mood increasing with every delay. The short cab ride back to Esca's place was mostly silent, Esca's temper obviously brewing as he stared out the window. It felt like he was sitting somewhere else entirely, in a different car, a different city. Marcus tried to rub some life back into his knee and to stretch out his shoulder.
“This happens. It's not serious.”
“No? You haven't fucked up the act? Forgive me if I'm unconvinced.”
“I need to rest it, that's it. I can go back to my place.”
“Because dragging that leg up two flights of stairs is going to be absolutely the best fucking thing for it in its current state?” Esca glared out of his window some more. “Hardly.”
Marcus wanted to reach out and touch Esca's thigh, his arm, something to reassure him, but the poisonous cloud of barely-suppressed anger pouring off Esca persuaded him against it. “It'll be okay. If I ice it and rest up tomorrow, I should be okay for tomorrow's show. Shouldn't even need physio.”
Esca's lips thinned. “Does it hurt? I hope so.”
“Hah, no. Nothing too bad. I'm sorry if I got you worried. About the act.”
“It's not that I mind you practically humping Jen on the dance floor, because that's your fucking business, but don't risk my career while you're at it. Wear your leg brace next time.”
So Esca had been watching them. “It's my career, too. Don't think I'm not aware of that.”
“Leave it. We'll talk once we're home.”
He had to rely on Esca to get him into the apartment, leaning on that compact, athletic frame as they moved him together over to the couch where he'd once spent a month of nights tied up in knots of sexual frustration over that body and all its concentrated energy. He'd lain awake for hours trying to figure out exactly what it was about Esca that attracted him so profoundly. It was like being dragged under water by a riptide, and the harder he'd fought against it, the more inevitable it became. He'd never liked feeling out of control, but had no idea where this undertow was taking him. Under water. He looked at Esca as Esca came back over, and felt scared for a second like he was starting to drown.
“Here.” Gently, almost tenderly, Esca propped Marcus's weak knee up where he was lying on the couch, pushing a cushion beneath it, placing an ice pack either side of what remained of Marcus's knee cap. “You're sure this'll do it?”
“Yeah. Thanks.”
“Eh, no problem. Take your shirt off.”
“Now? What . . .” Esca started tugging Marcus's shirt up over his head, making him laugh. “Okay. Well, I'm not going to say no, but I'm not going to be able to do much.”
“Fuckssake, stop thinking with your prick for five fucking minutes. Your shoulder's been bugging you since the show.” Seemed like Esca'd been keeping a close eye on him. Marcus hadn't said a word. “How did you manage to balls that one up?”
“It's nothing. Strained my traps a little on the moving balance.”
“You should've said. Budge up.”
Esca squeezed into a small space between Marcus's ass and the arm of the couch, one leg tucking in against Marcus's hip, rough hands warm on Marcus's shoulder as he started to dig his fingers in. Marcus moaned, letting his head fall forward into a stretch. “Hey, ease off.”
“Need to get into the deep tissue.”
The agile fingers that had stroked and tugged him to climax a hundred times felt like thin knives stabbing into his skin, relentlessly strong, thumbs moving with crushing force into the muscle. “Seriously. Ow.”
“Pussy. Grow a pair.”
“Is this a punishment or something?”
“No.” The soft rush of damp air that was Esca's sigh against the back of his neck made the hairs there stand on end. “It's necessity. I rely on you and your shoulders and your leg. I'd have brained myself on the stage that time if it wasn't for them.”
“You'd have dislocated a shoulder, max. It wasn't that big a deal. Rake of the stage throws it off.”
“Either way, I need you in full working order. Which is why I've figured out I owe you an apology.” The fingers dug deeper and more painfully, like Esca couldn't say he was sorry for anything without exacting some revenge. “Same way I rely on you, I know you do on me, on my balance. I shouldn't have gone off with Mads that time and got so stoned before a show. It was out of order.”
“I don't need you to apologize so long as you're not planning to do it again.”
“I'm not.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
They fell silent except for Marcus's grunts of pain as Esca worked his muscle until the whole shoulder felt like a bruise. Then Esca's hands stroked over his skin a few times before Esca surprised Marcus by putting his arms around him from behind, a slight hug, palms flat against his bare chest, Esca's forehead against his neck.
“I'm sorry it's got all complicated. Because it has and there's no point pretending it hasn't. I don't know how much of that's me, but I'm sorry.”
Marcus took hold of Esca's hands with his own, holding Esca into the hug. “It's not you. It's my fault. I didn't think I'd be this into you.”
“Thanks a fucking bundle.”
Marcus allowed Esca to pull him backwards until he was lying against Esca's stomach, hanging onto Esca's wrists like a lifeline. He stroked over them with his thumbs, liking the feel of Esca's arms around him like this too much, the angry throbbing of his shoulder and his aching knee almost forgotten as he closed his eyes and let himself go with it. There was every chance it wouldn't happen again. He was planning to enjoy it while it lasted.
“Righto.” Esca patted both hands against Marcus's chest dismissively. “That's your lot. Lemme up.”
It hadn't been long enough, barely thirty seconds. Marcus held onto Esca's wrists with more strength. “I'm comfortable.”
“And I'm thirsty and working my way up to a lengthy pee, so . . .” Esca started wriggling his way out from behind Marcus. “C'mon, fatty, shift your bum.”
“No.” His shoulder protested as he reached out to haul Esca back, but Marcus held on firm. Making a decision, taking action where he'd been paralyzed before. “Get your skinny butt back over here.”
“Fuck, no. No cuddling.”
Esca looked sulky, his cheeks pink, mouth pouty. It was cute as shit, and Marcus couldn't stop smiling up at him.“I like cuddling.”
“You like cuddling? I don't. MacCunovals aren't cuddlers.” Esca watched Marcus shifting over on the couch to make room, eyes narrowed, expression sour. “Just my luck, finding the one straight guy in the world who wants to fucking snuggle.”
Marcus patted the couch with the hand that wasn't holding Esca in place. “I know you didn't believe me before, but I think we've proved conclusively between us that I'm not altogether straight. Five minutes.”
“It'll complicate everything way more.”
“Chickenshit. It's only a cuddle.” He patted the couch again. “You can time it.”
“I will time it.”
“Go for it.”
“You think I won't?” Esca raised an eyebrow at him, pulling his phone out of his pants pocket to set an alarm. “Not a second longer, and it doesn't mean anything.”
“C'mon, clock's ticking. Sit your ass down.”
They didn't fit on the couch together correctly at first. Marcus had to shift backwards more, losing the ice packs in the process and having to reach down to put them back in place as Esca eased himself into a prone position beside him. Esca was rigid as a pole, limbs held inflexibly against Marcus, his head tucking awkwardly underneath Marcus's chin as he lay down against Marcus's naked chest like he was going to his execution. But Marcus wrapped his arms around Esca anyway, moving around silently until they fitted right. He'd been told before by exes and female friends that he was great at hugs, so was going to work every ounce of skill he had. It might not be romancing the shit out of anybody, but he could at least cuddle the fuck out of Esca while he had the chance.
It took a full minute before Esca relaxed into it, his inflexible pose slowly starting to sculpt itself to Marcus's body, the hand against his chest flattening into a touch. Marcus nuzzled into Esca's hair, smelling the shampoo from Esca's post-show shower along with that indefinable warmth of Esca's personal scent. His whole body felt lit up with a golden glow, his dick half-hard, his heart thumping heavy in his chest. “There we go.”
“Mm.”
“You like it. There's no shame in admitting it.”
“Bugger off.”
But Esca's arm went around him, Esca's face pressing into his chest that little bit tighter, and Esca's knee knocked the ice packs out the way as it moved between Marcus's legs. Esca's fingers splayed against the bare skin of his back, and Marcus was certain he felt Esca's lips brushing against his chest in the faintest shadow of a kiss. He was starting to feel drunk on it, head and heart swamped with gratitude towards the figure in his arms and a mess of other emotion, welling up so fast it made his eyes smart. He'd felt like his life had been over when he met Esca. Difficult to believe how much everything had changed since. Esca's hand stroking around to his chest drew Marcus's attention back, fingers starting to slide down towards his waistband as Esca started to rut gently against his thigh.
“Nu-uh, no, that's not what we're doing. No fooling around.”
“You've got to be fucking kidding me.” It was muttered hotly against the base of his throat.
“Five minutes. Plus I have to ice my knee more after.”
“So I'm just supposed to lie here for nothing? Christ.”
“I'm sorry.” Marcus patted Esca's back in fake sympathy. “It's torture.”
“I should hate you. I do.”
“Yeah, I know.”
Only a few minutes left to enjoy, but it felt to Marcus like a moment out of time, the couch and the two of them in a bubble separate from the rest of reality. They fit together so perfectly, Esca's body an ideal mix of heft and delicacy. His solidity was almost anchoring Marcus down. Something to hold onto. A lifeline, and he wasn't drowning any longer. Esca's shirt was old, washed soft, a contrast to the slight scratch of a few hours' stubble. His chest was rising and falling softly against Marcus's, his breath warm at Marcus's throat, his heart thudding against the bottom of Marcus's ribcage. Marcus took a long breath in through his nose to fill his lungs with Esca's scent. The seconds were counting down. He didn't want it to end, and he knew then that he didn't want any of it to end. Him, Esca, the dynamic that had developed between them. The sex, sure, but not only the sex.
“Fucking thing.”
The alarm on Esca's phone started trilling, a blanket of cooler air moving across Marcus's bare skin as Esca pulled away, taking all his warmth with him. But after picking his phone up and swiping the alarm off, Esca startled Marcus by tossing his phone back onto the coffee table, settling back against Marcus's chest without complaint.
“You understand why I'm apprehensive.”
It was a flat statement, said in a monotone into his neck. Marcus started rubbing his hand back and forth along Esca's shoulder, trying to encourage him. “Yeah.”
“I mean, even if you were gay, it doesn't automatically follow that you wouldn't chuck me for someone else. If anything, it'd be the opposite. I can't keep blaming everything on your former heterosexuality. Such as it was.”
“I hope not.”
“The thing that scares me, though . . .” Esca trailed off, so Marcus waited, letting his hand rest in the nape of Esca's neck. Then Esca shifted, ducking his head down and pressing his face into the center of Marcus's chest. “Well, worries me, not scares, exactly. The thing is - here's the thing.”
Waiting some more, Marcus hoped his patience would pay off. If he interrupted now he'd probably say the wrong thing and have Esca springing up, throwing a bellyful of sneering contempt his way before storming off towards the bedroom and leaving him there.
“When Bastien fucked off, it wasn't just a heartbreak thing. See, we only had a little act in this tiny circus, sideshow weirdness stuff, no money really, but it was kind of like a family and it was the first time I'd felt settled. I didn't want to be anywhere else. Everything was working out, y'know? Then the rug gets pulled out from under me and I'm left there, nothing to offer, rent I couldn't pay, shit of an ex-boyfriend farting off over the far horizon. I've been on my own since. Figured it was easier that way.”
Marcus pressed a kiss against the top of Esca's head in silent support as Esca hugged into him closer.
“Then you come along, and you're lovely, you big wanker. Perfectly lovely. Ruining everything. Making me get all 'no man is an island'. I mean, how fucking dare you.”
“I'm lovely?”
“No.”
Marcus grinned into Esca's hair, aware he was probably screwing this up but unable to stop himself. “You think I'm lovely.”
“Not anymore. Consider it a temporary loss of concentration, nothing else.” But then Esca's head came up, bumping Marcus's nose, and his face was flushed, his eyes dull with concern. “But you need to understand that doing anything other than the hot and nasty with you is a huge step for me, because I'm worried I like you too much already. I never liked Bastien that much and he still managed to fuck me up good and proper.”
Lifting a hand, Marcus ran a knuckle across Esca's cheekbone, letting his fingers find their natural path along Esca's jaw. “I'm not him. I'm lovely, remember?”
“When you're not annoying the piss out of me.” Esca tilted his head into Marcus's hand, closing his eyes. “Sometimes. And I don't generally like people much, so my ability to more or less tolerate you for long periods of time has been something of a surprise, to be perfectly honest.”
“Esca?”
The eyes remained closed, mouth opening slightly as he traced its upper line with his thumb. “What?”
“Sometimes you talk way too much.”
He'd had this man's cock in his mouth, experienced how it had pulsed with every heartbeat, discovered every texture, tasted how good he'd been making it feel. It hadn't been half as intimate as this kiss, their first in private for too long and the first that wasn't a prelude to something else. Agonizingly slow, Marcus palming Esca's neck as two hands cupped his face and drew him into it deeper, laying him wide open. It was the type of kiss people wrote songs about. Esca moved to lay mostly on top of him, kissing Marcus with a generosity and restraint that had none of his usual hunger or forceful need, and Marcus knew he was in serious trouble. Shit creek, no paddle. Esca broke away, rubbing his nose against Marcus's, his lips brushing Marcus's mouth as he spoke.
“C'mon. Bedroom.”
“Shit. I'm sorry. I want to, hell, I really want to, but if I don't ice my knee -”
“Will you shush?” Another brief kiss. “I'll tape up your knee, we can strap the ice packs on, then sleep. Once I've pissed for Britain, because I swear my bladder's twice the size of my head right now, I might, might, allow another five minutes' cuddling before I crash.”
“You want to sleep with me?”
Esca grinned. It didn't happen often enough. “I know. Bit kinky, isn't it?”
Perhaps it was going to take them awhile to get used to this. The same perfect fit didn't happen immediately once they'd managed to settle into Esca's big bed together, a slightly funky smell signaling to Marcus that the sheets hadn't been changed since he'd moved. They both had to shift around, directing arms around behind heads and navigating them into chests, a stray tuft of Esca's hair making its way up Marcus's nose and making him sneeze fully into Esca's disgusted face. But finally they settled in, both in their briefs, Marcus's knee heavily strapped up with Esca's leg thrown over it. Esca had found a space tucked into Marcus's armpit, head under his chin, fingers splayed across his chest, but it took some time for Esca to let his tension go, muscles and tendons slowly loosening.
“I'm glad we're doing this.” Marcus tickled his fingertips in circles on Esca's bare back, earning himself a satisfied sigh.
“It's good you think you know what we're doing, because I've got no sodding idea at all.”
“We'll figure something out.”
“Fuck knows what.” Esca gave Marcus's chest a quick nuzzle, next to his armpit. “'Night, then, Snuggles.”
“You love the cuddling. You're so obvious.”
“I'm willing to endure it. There's a difference.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. 'Night.”
Lying there, feeling sated like he'd eaten a huge meal, maybe a sixteen-ounce t-bone in mushroom sauce with mashed potatoes and buttered green beans with some kind of pie for after, Marcus could sense Esca gradually releasing himself into sleep. A twitch of a foot against his leg first, an unconscious movement of Esca's head closer into Marcus's neck. Hand flexing over his heart, breath coming faster and more shallow. A murmur of something Marcus couldn't make out, a grunt as Esca's body gave an involuntary lurch, then the softest of snores.
Marcus smiled to himself and turned onto his side towards Esca, wrapping an arm around this person who had changed everything, the warm body against his burrowing in closer. Tomorrow he'd probably wake to find Esca sprawled over the far side of the bed as usual, and Marcus would get bitched out for having to rest his leg all day, and get called fat, lazy, a mixture of both. Everything would be the same as before in a totally different world. He should probably feel way more concerned about than he did.
-
“Shit! Shit shit shitting fuck buggery wanking shitting thing!”
Marcus slowly dragged himself into consciousness from dreams of climbing a dusty set of shelves, finding himself lying on his belly, head halfway under his pillow. What angel wakes me from my flowery bed? He raised his head to rub over his hair and to locate Esca, who was standing in the bathroom apparently trying to beat the crap out of his bathtub with a towel. “I think it's dead.”
“What?”
“You killed it. Whatever it was.”
“Oh.” Esca looked down at his towel. “'Morning. Sorry. Didn't mean to wake you.”
“Hm. What was it? Spider?”
“No. Stupid fucking tub's broken. I can't get a single jet working.”
“Call a plumber.” Marcus lay back, stretching his neck, resting his head on his arm. Too comfortable to get up yet.
“Which would cost something ridiculous.”
“So take a shower. Or a regular bath.”
“Well, here's the thing.” Oh, Lord. Esca's tone had dropped into that familiar note of venom, his hands on his hips as he glared at the tub, then over at Marcus. “I wake up and you're snoring your arse off and taking up most of the bed, so I think, I know, I'll go have a nice wank lying in a bubbly bath, because that's relaxing, y'know? Because, frankly, bit of a stressful night last night with you being an arsehole and your stupid fucking leg. But, no, tub's still buggered and I can't even - what? What's that smirk for?”
“I guess this is progress.” Marcus had given Esca a sleepy smile. “You didn't run off to Mads' place this time.”
Esca's eyes narrowed to slits. “Tread lightly, Snuggles.”
Marcus sat up, unstrapping the warm ice packs from his knee and bending it a few times, feeling the usual click as the now-firmer tendon moved in its usual way beneath where Esca had taped it all up. No swelling to speak of, which was good. Esca was standing there in his briefs, thumbs hooked into his hips, his chest and stomach in immediate need of Marcus's hands stroking downwards to take those briefs with them, letting all the good stuff of Esca's pretty package tumble out. It was inspirational, and arousal had already warmed his balls into a dull throb, cock heavy.
“Leg's looking decent. We could probably do something, if we were careful . . .”
“I dunno.” The venom moved into petulant. “I've run the bath already.”
Marcus threw the sheet back, lying on his back and rubbing over his growing hard-on with the palm of his hand. “I shouldn't risk slipping in the tub.”
“Doing that's not going to work. I'm not in the mood.”
“No? Damn shame.”
He lifted his hips to pull his briefs down to his thighs, working his way out of them and to the bottom of the bed, cock lying flat and heavy against his stomach. Marcus knew he was a grower, but like this, freshly hard, he looked big-dicked, good and thick. Esca stood there frowning, watching him from underneath his eyebrows, a growing erection bowing out the front of his briefs as Marcus spread himself out on his back, sliding his hand down his chest to tug himself a few times. He'd always had a decent body but working with Esca had given him new bulk in his shoulders and chest, his abs nicely cut, lats hooded and tapering down to a taut waist and strong, flexible hips. He looked fucking hot naked, more than he had as a dancer. He wasn't certain he was irresistible, exactly, but it seemed like a good time to test the theory.
“Mm, feels good.” He spat into his hand and beat off more slowly, trying to make it porno as he licked his bottom lip and watched for Esca's reaction. “Been doing this a lot the last week.”
“Yeah.” Esca's voice had that husk to it, and he swallowed as he stared at Marcus's cock.
“Every morning, every night. Thinking about fucking you. Thinking about you blowing me.”
“Uh-huh.”
“I thought about blowing you, too.” Arousal was making Marcus braver, more immune to embarrassment. He reached down between his legs to cup and stroke his nuts. “Ended up jacking off sucking on my thumb like a dumbass.”
Esca's cheekbones were colored with slashes of red, the tip of his dick pushing out the elastic of his briefs. “I'm bigger than your fucking thumb, thanks ever so.”
“Then get it over here. Prove it.”
A blink of surprise. “You want to . . . ?”
“I'll endure it. C'mon, Esca. Unless you're still planning to take your bath.”
But Esca started kicking his way out of his briefs, his dick jutting in an upward curve that spoke of how turned on he was by Marcus's implied offer. His hand brushed Marcus's out of the way as he joined Marcus on the bed, starting to jack Marcus slow and tight as Marcus pulled him into a kiss. It was everything that last night's kiss hadn't been, hot, fast and wet, messy and loud, hands grabbing and teeth clashing. He'd missed this.
“How d'you want to do this?” Esca bit into Marcus's bottom lip, tugging at it with his teeth. “Sixty-nine?”
Marcus was ready to refuse, aware he'd never be able to concentrate on doing a good job with Esca's throat swallowing around his dick. Common sense intervened. “Hell, yes.”
“Awesome. Rest your leg, I'll move.”
Esca's flavor was stronger after a night's sleep, no less arousing but still a solid mouthful of 'there's a dick in my mouth' as Marcus fixed his lips around Esca's tip and laid his tongue against it. Esca already knew what to do with him, sliding his beautifully tight lips down around Marcus's length without effort as he lifted Marcus's nutsack to stroke, so Marcus did his best to copy Esca's actions. It was impossible to pay exact attention with that warm, wet mouth sucking him down, but whatever Marcus had managed to do, Esca seemed to like it, moaning softly around Marcus's cock.
Marcus's nuts were sensitive to every touch, which Esca had figured out right from the start, paying them a good amount of attention with his fingers and thumb. Marcus had never done that much with Esca's, so he scraped his fingers through the sparse, coarse hairs covering Esca's tight scrotum, reaching below to tickle over where he knew felt great on his. He'd worked more of Esca's dick into his mouth and tried sucking harder, Esca's hips jerking and a muffled moan around his length where it was buried in Esca's mouth. This was okay. No, it was hot as all get out, but tough to co-ordinate, anf Marcus couldn't thrust into Esca's mouth like he wanted to without forgetting about what he was doing with his mouth.
“Play with my bum.” Esca pulled off on a suck, mouthing the words against the head of Marcus's hard-on. “I'm not that bothered about my balls. It feels nice, but -”
“Sure, whatever's good.”
Marcus drooled onto his index finger, taking Esca's dick back into his mouth and trying to fit more of it in as he reached between Esca's legs to rub over the small knot of puckered skin that felt so good stretching around him. Esca groaned long on him, sucking harder with his fingers wrapped around Marcus's balls, his other hand on Marcus's ass cheek holding him close. Marcus worked the tip of his finger into the tight heat of Esca's asshole, feeling it crimp around him instantly, a stronger burst of flavor leaking over his tongue. Would he be able to swallow, if it happened?
“Relax.”
Sudden anxiety had straightened his spine as Esca's fingertips started to trace the line of his butt crack. His mouth must've tightened too much.
“I'm not planning on stuffing my hand up there. Holy fuck,” Esca started laughing, his breath gusting against Marcus's wilting dick. “It was a joke, I've never fisted anyone in my life.”
“Hilarious.”
“Aww. Think I scared him.”
Marcus looked down along the bed to Esca, Esca's dick knocking against his forehead, leaving a damp trail. “He's worried he wouldn't like it.”
“Then he needs to trust I've got his best interests at heart. Here, bend your knee. This is all I was planning to do. Nothing terrifying.”
Esca's mouth started to coax Marcus's cock into hardness again, the tip of his tongue teasing every sensitive spot as his fingers stroked up between Marcus's legs, between his ass cheeks. It felt tickly and weird. Marcus concentrated instead on working Esca's dick, pumping his head as he twisted his finger deeper into the tight, dry heat of Esca's ass. But then Esca's finger stroked slowly and deliberately over his butthole, and Marcus jerked, asshole in spasm, his dick hardening fully with a strong pulse of blood, balls drawing up.
“Hoh, hohh, that's - damn.”
Esca made an appreciative noise around Marcus's dick, then did it again, that one fingertip rubbing delicately over where nobody had touched before, extracting shivers of a skittish, wormy desire that shot through Marcus ass to nuts. His eyes closed, his mouth open, hands motionless against Esca's cock and ass. “Okay, yeah. That's . . . that's okay.”
“Then get back to work.”
“Oh. Sure.”
He never lasted long when Esca's mouth was on him, but needing to focus on Esca's cock and matching the movement of his head with the slow circular hip thrusts Esca was making kept his attention divided from where the combination of wet mouth and insistent finger had the climb already starting, sneaking into every muscle, every nerve ending. Esca's ass was clenching around his knuckle as Esca's grunts on his cock were getting louder, the flavor of Esca's arousal getting stronger, so Marcus pumped his head harder. There was no contest as there was no way in hell he'd last as long as Esca, given the disparity of skill involved, but he wanted to do a good job and the distraction of Esca's tongue was helping Marcus take Esca in deeper, to fixate less on what happened once a beej was taken to its logical conclusion.
“Close yet?”
“Yuh.” Marcus felt immersed in sex. Its taste all over his aching, spit-wet lips and tiring tongue, its salt stench deep in his nose. Tight and hot around his knuckle, radiating out from his over-sensitive asshole as Esca's finger played with it, itch building in the tip of his dick to transmit all the way down into the depths of his nuts. He was covered with it, Esca's nakedness pressed against his. He sucked harder, body tensing.
“Now?”
“Mnh . . .”
The movement of Esca's finger against his asshole had a direct route to his cock, like rubbing over a nipple just before climax only stronger, hotter, a route marked out in live current. Marcus sensed his body starting to quake with the strength of what was coming, then Esca's dry fingertip, lubed only with sweat, pushed into his butt a centimeter, sending a bolt of outraged stimulation to a system already on the edge of overload. Marcus gasped at the intensity, Esca's cock popping out of his mouth to rest against his cheek as Marcus bit his lip, closed his eyes and started to come with a low moan. It kept coming, a fresh jolt of pleasure every time his asshole clenched around the small, solid, aching fact of Esca's fingertip, the surging tip of his cock warming encased in Esca's throat, which was taking everything down, all that he had, so much of it.
“Whoa. Nice going, champ.” Esca stroked his asshole and dick slowly until the shivers set in, Marcus resting his head against Esca's thigh as he caught his breath. “So that worked.”
“Yeah.” Marcus forced his eyes open when Esca's body started shuddering beside him, the slap of Esca's hand on his dick inches from his face. “Hold up, I thought I'd finish . . .”
“No, you're alright. Take it easy.”
“C'mon, lie flat. If I can take a finger in my ass -”
“You don't get a medal. It was only my pinky.”
“- Then I can do this.”
He gripped Esca's cock by its base, holding it upward towards his mouth, its slit looking at him with every bit of beady intensity as its owner usually did. Esca's fingers ruffled his sweat-damp hair affectionately.
“You don't have to let me jizz in your mouth. It's not important.”
“I know.”
The last post-orgasm crackles were popping through his veins as Marcus fixed his lips around Esca again, starting to pump his head fast, trying to remember to suck every time he pulled off. He built up a rhythm, Esca moaning beneath him, hands cupped over both his ears, both his neck and shoulder starting to bitch about the work involved. It felt less awkward and unnatural than it had the first time. Maybe he could get used to this, only gagging a little when Esca thrust up too hard.
“Shit, sorry. You're good at it, oh, fuck you're so good at this.”
He'd never realized that learning to be a decent cocksucker would make him feel proud. Marcus liked making Esca feel this good, fingers sliding through his hair, hips hiking, curses starting to slur into an unintelligible mass of moans. The taste was getting stronger, saltier, Esca's dick feeling harder and thicker as Marcus managed to push his mouth down deeper, almost to the back of his tongue. He sucked hard, drawing deep and long, Esca's groan husky and wavering.
“Close, I'm, I'm . . . oh, shit, don't stop, I mean you should because I'm going to -” Esca was holding his breath, stomach clenched hard under Marcus's fingers. “You've got to move, I'm going to shoot.”
Marcus didn't have to make a decision. He wanted to taste how good he made Esca feel. It wasn't complicated. He pumped his head faster, sucked deeper, fingers tightening in his hair painfully a second before Esca shouted and it hit the back of Marcus's tongue. Not as warm as he'd expected, and there was too much dick in his mouth to taste much of anything. Not too bad, really, not as thick as his own, but then there was more, Esca cursing, his cock pulsing and there was more and more of it, everywhere, filling Marcus's mouth with a slippery salty-sweet bitterness that he started to swallow immediately just to get it out of his goddamn mouth.
“Oh! Oh, fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Oh, shit.”
Esca's hands were petting his face carelessly, fingers shaky. The bitterness was fast turning sour. “Good?”
“Very. Can't believe you did that. You big homo.”
Esca was looking down at him with a serene smile that was beautiful, his face flushed, hair clinging to his sweating forehead. Marcus wiped his mouth off with a handful of sheet, wondering if Esca would notice if he wiped his tongue, too.
“Now do I get a medal?”