i love you guys, but i hate livejournal. i wish i could bring myself to delete my little corner of cyberspace.

no one's online for me to talk to. no one's going to call me. i am so fucking lonely right now. can't wait until that title's in my hand...

fuck organized religion.
fuck this town.
fuck me.

*collapses onto the floor*

look, another update, and with lj-cut fun. wahoo. geez, how pathetic am i?

( so here's this journal-stolen survey thing you can read if you want... )

in two and a half months i turn eighteen, and i feel like my best work may already be behind me. it's an empty fretting feeling, seeing as i'm not fit for anything else. lousy depressing. waste of a mind, waste of a body.

i'm doing something wrong here.

if certain things i'm counting on don't work out, i'll go mad.

vroom vroom!

rediscovered how pleasant it is to walk in the nighttime cold in my distinctive black coat and boots; the relative silence of smalltown streets dissolving smoke from a cigarette, the palest accessory i've worn in months... strangely familiar and even more strangely comforting ( Read more... )

**here's for you, alan! only the good die young... i think she oughta last awhile. satisfactory?


( Read more... )

i was going to put up a song lyric or two, but there's no need for anything flowery right now... i'm just not a happy girl at the moment ( Read more... )

it's ten past four in the morning, i won't go to sleep, i'm being dangerous again, and i know that by retreating to my livejournal for another entry, i wipe out much chance of getting response to the last one. somehow that is important to me; i need the comfort of feeling that someone might care about what i say, wherever they are... cuz they sure ( Read more... )

i just made one helluva post on abstracthought, if anyone wants to check it out. i had its pre-final finished form done this summer, but just made some revisions... i'm fairly sure none of you have read it before ( Read more... )

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. the last entry was just not for this journal. christ, can't i do anything right? i hate me. and that has little to do with this goddamn lj... it merely manifests itself in it. so i don't want to post again until i feel worthwhile.
but i will, out of habit.

i'm going to grow out my hair until i can curl up naked and disappear in it.