Second Hand [Part One]
Title: Second Hand (II in the Second Verse)
Author: bellajayd
Pairing/Character: Dean/Castiel, onesided Sam/Dean [Jealous!Sam], Ruby
Category: Drama/Romance
Rating: R
Words: 2,500
Spoilers: YES. Up to the most recent episode.
Disclaimer: Supernatural does not belong to me. Just playing in someone else’s sandbox.
Warning: Spoilers up to and including Season 4. Slash and implied UST on Sam’s part for Dean.
Beta: Many, many thanks to aisling_door . Who hasn’t killed me yet. Baci-Ooglies!![tm]
Notes: This is the second story in the Second Verse. You should read Second Best before this. Anna? What Anna?! That did not happen in this verse. This takes place earlier in the season. This is going AU from the first story on. Comments and constructive criticism very welcome! Flamers will be made fools of by my beta. She’s a librarian, be very afraid.
Summary: In which Dean is hiding something, Castiel cops a feel, Ruby eats fries, and Sam thinks. Pie is involved.
Second Verse: Master List
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Sam has noticed many differences in Dean since his return from Hell. Most of these new quirks explain themselves.
Ordering an entire pie at every diner.
The small black Bible that has taken up permanent residence in his leather jacket, and the demon-killing knife tucked into the waistband of his jeans.
Sam understands the magic of pie, faith, and steel.
He is grateful - so very grateful - that Dean was returned to him with even a scrap of his sanity remaining that he wouldn’t care if his brother decided to paint the Impala pink and listen to pop music, so long as it helped him keep the demons in his mind at bay. It’s the same reason he hasn’t tried to stop Dean from his self-imposed mission to drink the nearest liquor store dry. If that’s what Dean needs in order to sleep through the night, then Sam can’t find it in himself to deny him what comfort he could find.
Sam is lost when it comes to helping his brother.
In an act of desperation, he calls Ruby and goes to meet her while Dean takes a shower.
Weeks have passed and Dean still isn’t getting any better.
“Ha! That’s cute Sam. Hell isn’t like a cold, Dean’s not just going to ‘get better.’ There is no getting over it. Trust me. I’ve spent a few centuries trying.” Ruby’s tone is swollen with bitter humor as she nibbles on some fries, “Then again . . . Heaven never staged an intervention for me.”
His hand clenches into a bloodless fist at the reference to Castiel. The one who accomplished what Sam could not, the one who saved Dean.
Sam is smart enough to realize that he’s not angry at the angel, but rather at himself for not being strong enough to help his brother - he was unable to protect Dean the way that he’d always protected Sam. None of the logic in the world, however, stops resentment from consuming him when he thinks about it.
A stranger had touched Dean intimately, held him close in an unyielding grip and pressed a permanent brand of possession into his purified and perfect flesh.
So, yeah, logic doesn’t really help Sam when he thinks about the angel because he chokes on the shame of his greatest personal failures. Logic doesn’t halt Dean’s downward spiral and neither, it seems, does Heaven.
Sam is at his wits end.
Then, suddenly, it stops.
Dean starts sleeping through the night. When he wakes, his eyes are empty of fear and stress doesn’t bracket his mouth. The air of barely leashed violence that had shadowed him since his resurrection is gone. His rough and ragged edges smooth out apparently overnight, leaving in their wake a Dean Winchester who is calm and still.
A Dean Winchester who doesn’t drink, flirt, or fuck women. Who doesn’t blast music or flinch away from his own reflection.
Who only orders one piece of pie after dinner.
Demons are exorcised quickly and efficiently without the venom of a personal vendetta. Even the pleasure of a hot shower seems to have lost its appeal to Dean; he’s in and out of the bathroom in the blink of an eye, coming out fully dressed and ready to clean weapons or research without complaint.
Sam likes having all of the hot water to himself and the luxury of being able to spend a little alone time in the shower, but it’s unnerving not to have to fight for the extra five minutes with his brother.
His faith is telling him to accept this for what it is: another miracle that has saved his brother from himself. Winchester intuition, on the other hand, is howling at him that there is something terribly wrong with Dean.
Sam is torn and his fingers have found a new home hovering over Bobby’s phone number.
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PART TWO