If you're talking about who I think you're talking about...iamtherealcaednJune 24 2005, 06:28:13 UTC
Y'know, if I had more self-esteem than I do, I would probably get angry and be all ass-like and stuff. But, unsuprisingly enough, the only thought that ran through my mind was "dammit, now that I look at it I can see that there's been a disconnect somewhere." I'm still trying, in my own convoluted way. But I've felt like I've been distanced. That and this gives me a new dilemma to blow out of proportion and make me all depressed. Lookit mee, I'm self-defeating. Basically, I've gone from hesitantly optimistic about my chances (which is the highest I get in that area of my life) to rather pessimistic. I tend not to think of myself as being able to compete with others in that type of thing. But I don't even really know, because I don't like competing. Hell, I don't even know why I'm writing this; it doesn't even make sense. What is my goal for writing this? I don't know, but it sure as hell better not be to make you feel bad or to discourage you. And if that is what happens, then I'll be sure not to do it again by not posting comments
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