Challenge 1, Prompt 2: Fog
Title: Out In The Cold
Author:
soulsdisband
Pairing: Gerard / Bert
Rating: G
POV: Gerard's
Summary: Challenge 1, Prompt 2: Fog
Disclaimer: Dont : own+know+sue
A/N: I don't know what I think about this one. Con-crit is very welcome.
The air is thin in your backyard, and it’s making my lungs feel shallow. But maybe that’s just because you’re here.
Each time we speak, it’s not just with words but with wisps of frost and a biting cold. There is a fog settling around us which makes me want to slide into your arms, but I can’t because I’m frozen stiff. I can’t because you will hate me.
We’ve been sitting for hours in a broken silence. I kept opening my mouth to say something, anything to make us warm again, but your blue eyes bore into me and kept me quiet. Until you go to leave, when I can’t help but call after you “What do you want from me?” When we both know.
You whip around and spit callously “Give up Gerard. There‘s nothing here for you”
I can feel small drops of rain starting to fall. They sting my arms and face with a bitter cool, and I can see your face turn rosy in the cold. “What about you?” And I’m pleading with all I can muster. My usually confident footsteps are jolted by an insecurity only you can bring out in me.
You sigh, and a heartbreaking look of failure adorns your face. I try to read your eyes but they’re filling up with tears, dropping in slow-motion and freezing before they shatter on the ground. So, suddenly you’re the one that needs convincing of this. But you’re gesturing as if you’re speaking and I can’t hear the words - I don‘t know what else to say. So I stand next to you and I press my cold hands to your flushed cheeks, making you look at me. “What about you?” I repeat. “Aren’t you still here?”
But you pull away and ball yourself up, shaking your head and murmuring something undecipherable through the sobs. With every step I take forward, you take one back until you’re against the icy grey concrete of the house. I stand still, giving you the chance to look me in the eyes and say you want me. Letting you decide whether or not we go on.
“I don’t belong here,” you finally speak “not with you.”
“I’ll take you back. You know I will” but my heart still breaks as you rip yourself away.
“It’s not that simple” But I don’t see why not. I still love you, I still want you. All you have to do is say ‘Yes’ and fall carelessly into my arms. We both know it would be warmer that standing out here with a mist of yesterday settling upon us. We both know it would be easier to see through this fog if we looked out for each other. But you can’t see that - your vision blurred by tears and the idea that you can learn to like this never-ending winter.
“Why won’t you fight for us?” and I’m pleading again. But this time I don’t want your words, I just want your warming touch.
Instead you look me hard in the eyes, making me shiver. “Because we don’t exist anymore”
The air is thin in your backyard, and it’s making my lungs feel shallow. But maybe that’s just because you’re gone.
Author:
soulsdisband
Pairing: Gerard / Bert
Rating: G
POV: Gerard's
Summary: Challenge 1, Prompt 2: Fog
Disclaimer: Dont : own+know+sue
A/N: I don't know what I think about this one. Con-crit is very welcome.
The air is thin in your backyard, and it’s making my lungs feel shallow. But maybe that’s just because you’re here.
Each time we speak, it’s not just with words but with wisps of frost and a biting cold. There is a fog settling around us which makes me want to slide into your arms, but I can’t because I’m frozen stiff. I can’t because you will hate me.
We’ve been sitting for hours in a broken silence. I kept opening my mouth to say something, anything to make us warm again, but your blue eyes bore into me and kept me quiet. Until you go to leave, when I can’t help but call after you “What do you want from me?” When we both know.
You whip around and spit callously “Give up Gerard. There‘s nothing here for you”
I can feel small drops of rain starting to fall. They sting my arms and face with a bitter cool, and I can see your face turn rosy in the cold. “What about you?” And I’m pleading with all I can muster. My usually confident footsteps are jolted by an insecurity only you can bring out in me.
You sigh, and a heartbreaking look of failure adorns your face. I try to read your eyes but they’re filling up with tears, dropping in slow-motion and freezing before they shatter on the ground. So, suddenly you’re the one that needs convincing of this. But you’re gesturing as if you’re speaking and I can’t hear the words - I don‘t know what else to say. So I stand next to you and I press my cold hands to your flushed cheeks, making you look at me. “What about you?” I repeat. “Aren’t you still here?”
But you pull away and ball yourself up, shaking your head and murmuring something undecipherable through the sobs. With every step I take forward, you take one back until you’re against the icy grey concrete of the house. I stand still, giving you the chance to look me in the eyes and say you want me. Letting you decide whether or not we go on.
“I don’t belong here,” you finally speak “not with you.”
“I’ll take you back. You know I will” but my heart still breaks as you rip yourself away.
“It’s not that simple” But I don’t see why not. I still love you, I still want you. All you have to do is say ‘Yes’ and fall carelessly into my arms. We both know it would be warmer that standing out here with a mist of yesterday settling upon us. We both know it would be easier to see through this fog if we looked out for each other. But you can’t see that - your vision blurred by tears and the idea that you can learn to like this never-ending winter.
“Why won’t you fight for us?” and I’m pleading again. But this time I don’t want your words, I just want your warming touch.
Instead you look me hard in the eyes, making me shiver. “Because we don’t exist anymore”
The air is thin in your backyard, and it’s making my lungs feel shallow. But maybe that’s just because you’re gone.