En Själ Djup Och Sorgsna Farväl

[berwaldsverige]

 ((A Soul Deep and Sorrowful Farewell))

The ride to the airport early the morning of the 26th was subdued and Eino and Tino left Berwald to his withdrawn contemplation. They knew today was going to be very difficult and he was getting to an inner place of strength to carry out what was long overdue.

The Flight itself was just under 55 minutes and

Comments

[tino_suomi]

Tino spent the entire day simmering in his own Finnish juices. Berwald hadn't slept well the night before, despite having konked out early. He had to contain his tongue for most the day, hoping not to make the situation any worse. He'd had to kind of scold Berwald into getting the giant to eat SOMETHING for breakfast... even if it had only been a few pieces of toast and jam

[berwaldsverige]

He felt so cold inside he was afraid he'd never feel warmth again. It had taken every ounce of his will power not to crumble and crack when he'd seen how happy his siblings were, how much they adored their father

[tino_suomi]

"Bear." Tino whispered, collecting his fiance into his arms, flinching only far enough away to remove Berwald's glasses and tuck them into his own pocket. He pressed his love into his shoulder and caressed the back of his head. His heart was breaking in two. "I love you so much. You're so brave." He whispered. He didn't need a response, he just wish he could have his love radiate from his chest and warm Berwald from the inside out. Oh how Berwald had years of pains to release and Tino didn't know what to say or to do to make it better. All he could do was just hold onto his love and profess his love in whispers and murmurs, petting his hair and pressing his lips into Berwald's forehead. He was all consumed in this work when his father meekly announced their arrival at the hotel

[berwaldsverige]

Berwald couldn't talk, he was too choked up for words, he just meekly nodded into Tino's neck as he pulled the shards of his dignity and pride back around him in broken pieces and wiped his face on his coat sleeve to try and hide the traces of his misery

[tino_suomi]

"Okay, okay." He murmured, laying back down and staring up at Berwald, before releasing a sad chuckle. "You look like you got in a fight with a bear." He commented, "And your glasses got broke. You want your spare pair?" He asked, but didn't wait for an answer, he simply dove his hand into the over night bag and produced the glasses case for Berwald.

"Will you lay down here with me?" He asked. "Everything's okay." He promised, caressing Berwald's arm gently.

[berwaldsverige]

Berwald took the case and just held it for a minute, leave it to Tino to always carry his spare eyes no matter where they went.

He just set the case on the nightstand, his face hurt too much at the moment to put them on and he sat there a moment longer. "I'm sorry." Berwald sighed. "I've got you all tangled up in my baggage." He added, his elbows on his knees where he sat on the edge of the bed beside Tino.

"I'm sorry about everything Ti."

[tino_suomi]

"I am too. I wish I could help you carry it better. I don't know how. But, I want to keep being here for you. Do you want to talk about it?" He questioned, gently caressing Berwald's dug up back with his finger tips. "I want to listen. The baggage might not be so heavy if you throw some of it out in the open." He sat up enough to rest his head on Berwald's shoulder blade. "You shouldn't have to feel bad."

[berwaldsverige]

"I don't want you to carry it Ti. I feel bad enough as it is about you having to see it at all, and you got hurt because I can't control myself sometimes. I really don't know why you stay with me, some freak with anger and violence issues. I'm so furious at myself for hurting you. I wouldn't blame you if you packed me off on the first plane out frankly." Berwald said grabbing the scotch bottle he'd set on the night stand and taking another long swill.

[tino_suomi]

He released a Finnish expletive at himself for having allowed their food to become cold.

"And all things considered, I won't even groan about being your wife right now." He smiled gently. He HAD promised, and besides, with the day they'd had he did not feel bad about sacrificing a little of his masculinity to give Berwald his way.

He ate as much of his meal as he could, and then offered what was left on his plate to Berwald, his big sexy trash compactor. "Who's up for going to bed early?" He teased, slowly raising his hand.

[berwaldsverige]

Berwald sat up long enough to eat a few bites, he still had no appetite. "I need to clean up first, then I don't mind going to bed early." He said heading into the bathroom, well, trying to.

He stubbed his big toe on the side of the chair along the way and then nearly crashed headfirst into tile again.

God he hated being Blind as a bat without that nifty bat sonar to keep him from falling over everything.

He turned on the water in the sink and tried cleaning up his many scratches, bumps and bruises. He leaned over to wash his face in the sink and got a touch of vertigo as he straighten back up. He must have given himself a mild concussion when he hit his head.

He had to grip the counter in support before he really did fall over again while he waited for the momentary dizziness to pass.

[tino_suomi]

"Bear, do you need some help?" Came Tino's worried voice from the bed, it was obvious that he'd seen Berwald get dizzy and had of course seen him stub his toes and peter about blind. He felt so bad for his poor, visually impaired love. He hopped down out of bed, oh boy now that he was standing up his hips did hurt really bad! Berwald was right, they should probably never be that rough with each other again. There was a first time for everything... and sometimes that first time should remain the only time. "I'm coming Bear, hang tight." He promised, scooting over to the bathroom as fast he could and helping to steady the very dizzy giant. "Don't topple over again, you'll get hurt worse."

[berwaldsverige]

"I apparently cracked my ssssskull h-h-harder than I thought." Berwald said his speech evidently slurred and not from alcohol, he was one dizzy giant seeing stars and showing several symptoms now of a concussion

[tino_suomi]

"Eduard is a Star Wars fan, you two are going to mix like oil and water." He chuckled. "And Patrick Stewart does have an awesome voice." He said, but then watch curiously as Berwald picked up his glasses and returned them to where they belonged.

"Well, I have tack now, so I guess I need the swear words." He smiled. "How will I ever get by without the swear words? I know Rovhal." He chuckled. "It means Mathias."

[berwaldsverige]

Berwald chuckled. "Rövhål IS Mathias. It means Asshole." Berwald clarified.

"Okay here's one for you... Fan ta dig. It means Fuck Off. One of your favorites." Berwald grinned.

"I'll write you a list of them later." Berwald said looking up at the television.

"I wouldn't call myself a Trekkie. I just loved the show when I was a kid, I watched it all the time after school. I like Star Wars too. I'm an equal opportunity nerd."

[tino_suomi]

"Oh, good... because Eduard wants to stuff you in a chewbacca costume... fair warning." He mused, cuddling in with Berwald and getting sleepy.

"Tack for writing them down, I'll be swearing like a Swedish sailor before you know it." He was very tired and was starting to peter in and out of alertness. Finally, warm, knowing Berwald was safe, and with a full belly he was relaxing quite a bit. He wasn't even paying any attention to the pain in his back and hips. It was unimportant. What was important was being here with Berwald and that they were safe, sound, and together... and that they would be staying that way from now on.

[berwaldsverige]

Berwald happily accepted a cuddly Tino under the covers and he flipped off the Television and just tossed the remote on he floor. "Come here and cuddle with me sleepy head." Berwald said tucking Tino close against his heart.

"A Chewbacca costume would be awfully warm. Darth Vader was also really tall." Berwald said Yawning and reaching up to switch off the lamp.

"I'm too tired to worry about it though and we have to be up early to catch or flight. Goodnight Buttercup. I love you."

(The SWEAR LIST): http://www.youswear.com/index.asp?language=Swedish