i want to want something bad enough.

i want

an answer, dammit
a flight out of here
a moment of clarity
a certain boy
a persimmon (or two)
a backyard catnap on a trampoline
a cup of blackberry-sage tea
an ambition
a direction
a command
an origami dragonfly
a window that looks out to the hills

i want something else.
(i want not to want.)

holdinghandsbetweengearshifting salad3 sheets purple nori (korean groceries have it ( Read more... )

pomelos have the best combination of colors, possibly even better than watermelon & tying perfectly with peach-blueberry cobbler ( Read more... )

holie carp it's sweltering.

i just got off the phone with sir mike robert cool a minute ago!!!! he might be coming to visit with nick (!) sometime soon. KA-razy. something to look forward to. or dread.

and a 50-year-old kissed me a few days ago. oy.

#1holy fuck!!!--->

( Read more... )

dramatastic!

i miss nectarines.
and picking flowers from springtime barnesandnoble parkinglots, to make ambush bouquets for people.
and barnes and noble.
and FUCK! HORCHATAS.
if i keep going this list'll take on a life of its own.

time for a distraction. ooooh! something bright and colorful!
old pixies... clicky-click-click

( Read more... )

why do i keep doing this to myself ( Read more... )

left or right?
deprived/depraved?

it's actually an obvious choice.

BUT!
why isn't it depravation?
and why not deprivity?

i used to carry around a pack of cinammon tictacs with advils mixed in, camouflaging as mints. where the fuck is that now?

ps ( as promised, a recipe )

i think from now on all my posts will have recipes. here's one now.

iloveshagcarpeting salad1/2 yellow watermelon (with seeds! seedless = loser ( Read more... )