Steve Perry is perhaps the most beautiful man on the planet. I am quite devastated at the fact that I will never be able to see him perform live with Journey.
So Steve Perry had a dream about you last night. He was trying to make a move on you. But I said, "Whoa, Stevo. There's only room for one Steve in her life, and it's me."
Then you bitchslapped me. And jumped into the air with a Matrix-like spinning roundhouse kick to the back of my head.
Then you ran to Steve Perry.
Steve Perry laughed. You cried.
True story.
Oh, then Hikki came and helped me up. And Steve Perry said, "Hey, who's the Asian chick?"
And I said, "That's Beth."
And he said, "No, THAT Asian chick. I thought this was MY dream, man."
And I smiled and said, "Sorry, Steve. I'm jackin' this dream for m'self!!"
('Cause that's how I really talk, yo.)
Truer story.
And I won't even TELL you about when Columbo showed up . . . 'cause that's . . . not so true.
Ask Vince. He was there. But he wasn't paying attention. He was reading Twilight. What a girl.
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Then you bitchslapped me. And jumped into the air with a Matrix-like spinning roundhouse kick to the back of my head.
Then you ran to Steve Perry.
Steve Perry laughed. You cried.
True story.
Oh, then Hikki came and helped me up. And Steve Perry said, "Hey, who's the Asian chick?"
And I said, "That's Beth."
And he said, "No, THAT Asian chick. I thought this was MY dream, man."
And I smiled and said, "Sorry, Steve. I'm jackin' this dream for m'self!!"
('Cause that's how I really talk, yo.)
Truer story.
And I won't even TELL you about when Columbo showed up . . . 'cause that's . . . not so true.
Ask Vince. He was there. But he wasn't paying attention. He was reading Twilight. What a girl.
Truest story.
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