This morning I felt horrible. I felt like a big, fat, ugly cow. I wanted to hide myself, literally hide myself. I still feel that way, but that's not why I wanted to write
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Lacy, I'm so glad to hear of this decision. The guilt involved with Christianity can be helpful, but also very dangerous and hurtful (the way I think it was for you). I think there are some important and positive concepts held within Christianity, but it just wasn't a good match for the sensual and independent woman that you are in your heart. Although I always respected your decision, it hurt me to see you repressing so many important and beautiful parts of yourself. I could see how uncomfortable you were in your own skin, and although it was obvious that you felt a natural religious ecstasy, it wasn't worth forcing yourself to be a completely different person.
I dunno, that's just how I see it. And know that, whatever you've done in the past or decide in the future, Pentecostal or no Pentecostal, I love you and think you're awesome. I truly believe that God loves you and will continue to love you unconditionally.
Aww, thanks Lena. I love you lots too, and you know I've always thought you were awesome. It feels great to have made a decision at last, and it feels even better feeling peaceful about the choice that I made. =) Its funny, wicca seems so much different now. It seems more sacred than it ever did when I was a teenager. Its quite beautiful. Anyway, thanks for always being there for me and lending an ear when I need to talk. Love ya.
Strangly I was sitting at work bored, looking at a computer screen bored of playing WoW and the thought came to me, lacy, tarot and live journal. Out of no where! So I came over to your LJ (surprised I still remembered been ages since I've been on here), saw your post on lj. I think your decision is a good one if it makes you feel better :) Penetecostal movement is full of shit (not the message but the poeple behind the message) and thankfully is losing steam. Making a person feel guilty or judged is horse shit. How people are stupid enough to fall under the pressure of it all. I'm glad you found something that works for you and I hope it works for you and continues to do so! I'm so glad that you see it differently, makes it like discovering something new all over again. I support you :) Need anything let me know. Remember Romans 1 talks about how a person is judged on their knowledge and acts. So tell the church to go fuck themselves and go have a fun life. Besides if God is such a anal retentive as comes across in the bible I
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I dunno, that's just how I see it. And know that, whatever you've done in the past or decide in the future, Pentecostal or no Pentecostal, I love you and think you're awesome. I truly believe that God loves you and will continue to love you unconditionally.
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