ohh internet. why do i have this urge to write personal things on here for god knows who to read.
im sick of crying. i just miss you. so so much.

does anyone ever get the feeling of extreme...anxiety? shakiness? crazed? for no fucking reason ( Read more... )

its funny when you realize that someone who you thought was your friend, just isnt. i guess its not so funny when you find out they dont care about you or value your feelings anymore. we are just two totally different people now, and our shared past wont change that. the more i think it it, though, the more im ok with it. i suppose i just dont ( Read more... )

sometimes, you know, shit just happens. some of it is your own fault, some of it isn't. this time it was totally my fault. me just missing an opportunity and watching it go by until it was so far away, i couldn't even see its' shadow. which is when i realized how much i wanted what had already been and gone ( Read more... )

is it weird for me to think what sex would be like after a 2 year-plus relationship ( Read more... )

i don't want to be single if im gonna be living in vancouver for the winter ( Read more... )

i hate it when other people make you realize how clueless you are. no one else has the right to make me feel like shit about my decisions, or lack there of.
how am i supposed to sort my life out when i have no idea where to start.
it feels like

my mind wanders
i am smart
my mind wanders
i am dumb
the more i think, the less i know

i dont know what to dooooo
i think i might have done the wrong thing
this whole time..kidding myself
im so fucked up.

so,
the guy who i knew i should never have started things up with ended it.
he felt bad about the other guy...maybe he even felt as bad as me
regardless, he had the balls to end it

i know its for the best..but then why do i feel so shitty about it?
why do i feel so shitty about it all.

how do i do this
something that i know i shouldnt do yet i do it anyways?
im in the worst situation and now im supposed to choose
but how do i choose when i like them both equally for different reasons?
im leading them both on hardcore, point a.
point b, im being pretty slutty in the process.
help!?