Aozora's Song (5/12)
Previous: Aozora's Gratitude
05. Aozora's Loneliness
She watched through the eyes of a dirty young girl and yet, she also watched from far away, also removed from the emaciated body. The young girl had stolen something and hid under a cart in the crowded market to revel in her prize. She unwrapped the stolen bundle in her hand, expected coins or at least food, but saw that instead she had stolen a set of bones.
A man stepped up to the cart and with one flourish the cart fell apart above her. Fear coursed through her as she sat in the open. She turned to see the man she had stolen from. She met his bottomless eyes and fell into its depths. He studied her. Then he extended one hand.
"Come with me," the dark magician compelled her.
Somehow Ao knew, and later the young girl would find out, that the bones belonged to this man’s long dead lover.
*
As she regained consciousness, Ao felt the roughness of the uneven ground beneath her. She opened her eyes and saw sunlight filter through the boughs of the tree above her. She sighed deeply. She was herself, the princess of her kingdom, on her way to Lord Sakurai. Not the young girl.
"If we circle around, it'll add an extra four days to our journey, but it's still a safer course." FIVE's voice wafted to her.
Ao stilled and strained to catch their conversation.
"She won't last. Every day, her strength lessens. The princess is not used to such a hard, long journey," ONE countered.
His voice stirred a few more images in her mind and Ao did her best to suppress the nausea.
"Then we'll put her to sleep and carry her the rest of the way."
"That'll slow us down even more. And you and I need our strength, Jun."
Jun. FIVE's name was Jun. Weakly, Ao registered that into her mind, but she was still too tired to work through the implications.
"Then what do you propose we do? Lord Sakurai doesn’t know we’re coming. Continuing on our original path is a sure way to get ourselves killed."
Jun’s raised voice split her head in half. A groan escaped her lips and she gave up all pretense of sleep as she clutched her head. She heard the hurried shuffle of running feet and felt someone knelt by her side. A gentle hand overlapped hers. Warmth enveloped her and calmed her. Her headache eased away.
"Is she awake?" FIVE asked from behind his comrade.
Crouched beside her, ONE did not reply. Ao gave them their answer by opening her eyes and peering up at him hovered above her in concern. Their visors were still pulled down over their faces, but they were no longer just magician-warriors and her escorts. FIVE was Jun and Ao was sure Jun knew ONE’s name, too.
She found herself saying, almost without thinking, "Please, take the detour. I will make it. I don't want anyone to die."
*
Her nightmare still lingering the next day, she asked if one of her pursuers, or one of the conspirators against the king, was a powerful dark magician who lived in a tower. ONE who stayed with her that afternoon hesitated for a long time, long enough that she thought he would not answer her. But he did.
"Except for the Gold Magician who follows no one," he started in a mumble that she almost couldn't catch, "magicians of that caliber no longer exists, or they choose to remain hidden and isolated. Any magician with considerable power in this age is bonded to the service of a lord."
"Gold Magician," Ao murmured. She had heard of him before. Stories had been told of his mysterious reappearance every few hundred years to offer his services to particular people. He had appeared at the palace at her birth and had been the one to cast the protective wards around the palace, after all.
"FIVE and I will take care of any magic pursuers on our heels," ONE assured her with sudden confidence when she fell into contemplative silence.
Jun, her mind filled in the name and she obsessively wished she knew ONE’s name as well. Not heeding Jun’s advice, she watched him closely while he sharpened his dagger on a stick, threw the stick into the campfire, then brought out a brush to groom the horses. He brushed his horse first. Ao saw the gentle way he handled the creature. Then as he turned to Jun's horse, Ao stood and approached him slowly.
"Can I...?" she asked.
He turned his head and watched her from behind his visor. She wished she could see his face so she could read his expression. She pointed to the brush in his hand. She could tell he was surprised. ONE hesitated and stared at the brush for longer than necessary before he offered it to her. He stepped aside and allowed her to pull the brush through the horse’s mane. Ao was careful and attentive, afraid to hurt the animal. She brushed until the fine hairs became silky soft. Pleased, she glanced at ONE and found him caressing the horse not paying attention to her. He murmured to it quietly, so quietly that she did not catch his words. Her pulse quickened and she frowned. When she turned to groom her own horse, she realized she wished his kindness could be directed at her.
Jun saved them from the prolonged silence when he appeared from the forest with a handful of greens and a fat rabbit in his belt. ONE left her side and joined Jun near the edge of their camp. He gutted, skinned, and cleaned the rabbit, working efficiently and with skill that came with experience. Jun fished a metal pot from out of nowhere, boiled water, and washed the greens he had gathered in an also miraculously appearing bowl. In moments, the stew they had cooked up was boiling over their campfire. Jun pulled out a small bundle from their simple packs and added a few spices into the pot while ONE dug a hole under the roots of a tree with his dagger and buried the remains of the rabbit. Ao's stomach growled when the smell of their meal wafted to her.
Once he destroyed the rest of the evidence, ONE sat by Jun at the fire. She knew by the turn of his head that he noticed she had not joined them. ONE saw her by the horses where he had left her, but he turned back to the fire in front and ignored her. A painful, unrecognizable cry surged in her chest.
When the stew finished, Ao was given a large steaming portion in another bowl and spoon before her escorts turned their backs to her again. Ao felt alone even though they surrounded her. She knew she was, in reality, alone and that she shouldn’t be surprised. Ao reminded herself that ONE and Jun were there to guard her. They only did their duty to their lord, like the hundreds of servants back at the palace who also served her, but she couldn’t trick herself that being with these two were the same. They were different; somehow, more human. They worried about her.
Jun interrupted her isolated self-contemplation. “There is a small stream nearby, Princess,” he started. “Since we will not move until morning, you can wash. We will stand guard.”
*
Ao waded into the center of the stream. The crystal clear water only went up to her knees and she could see the rocks at the bottom. Their roughness bit into the soft soles of her bare feet and she winced when she stepped on a sharp edge. Upstream, ONE's back was turned to her. He crouched with his hands in the water, but even submerged she could see the red glow of fire in his hands. The water that flowed down to her was warm. Ao clutched her nakedness self consciously and bent to wash quickly. She scrubbed herself with a few herbs Jun had given her, glad to be finally rid of the grime that had accumulated in the last few days. Her eyes scanned the forest, wondering where Jun was. He had followed them, but along the way had faded into the forest to guard a wider circumference.
Ao felt tolerably cleaner once she finished and climbed back to the bank. Still damp, she pulled on her tunic and trousers. She addressed ONE whose back was still turned, "I'm done."
He nodded to her. She thought he would climb out and lead her back to their camp. Instead he pointed and gestured for her to move on as if he expected her to find her way back alone. He gestured again and Ao realized she hadn't misunderstood; he wanted her to leave without him. Reluctantly, Ao took a step inside the forest, suddenly dark and menacing now that the sun had set. She glanced back, wishing he'd show her the way, but ONE was no longer paying attention to her.
He had removed his helmet and armor and, as she watched stunned, stripped off his shirt to reveal his lean bodice and tanned skin. He was still turned and she only saw the back of his head and the deep black of his cropped hair. Her heart skipped. Her face burning, she ran into the forest before he caught her staring.
Fool, she called herself. He was washing. Was she so discourteous to watch him? Embarrassed and furious at herself, she stormed through the dark forest with no attention to where her footsteps led her. Jun suddenly stepped out in front of her. Ao jumped back in alarm and quickly covered her mouth although she had made no sound.
"Your highness, you're veering away from our camp." He pointed his arm to her left. "I'll lead you there."
*
Ao turned her back to Jun this time and sat by the fire to comb out her wet hair with her fingers. She was afraid he could read the guilt and embarrassment in her face and did not want to confess what she had seen. The long strands of her black hair were nearly dry when she finally looked back at Jun and saw ONE watching her where Jun had previously been. She had not noticed the switch and her heart raced at his sudden appearance, or so she told herself that was the only reason. Darkness consumed the world beyond their campsite, making the small space the two of them occupied intimate. In the awkwardness, Ao cleared her throat and spoke.
"You always build the fires,” she told him. “Can FIVE not conjure fire?" She did not actually doubt his ability. After all, even someone untrained like her knew how to call a flame.
Like always, ONE took a long time to answer. "He could, but fire is my specialty and he has his."
Ao couldn’t help but feel curiosity once he started and did not continue. “What is his?”
After a shorter pause, ONE said, "He can charm any animal."
She had read in the book she stole that there existed five forms of magic: the manipulation of fire, the manipulation of objects, the taming of beasts, mind coercion, and the most powerful and rare binding with the Earth. Skill determined the level of each form a magician could wield, but talent determined whether a magician could twist each form to his purpose.
*
In Ao’s dream, the young girl, now a few years older, ventured alone in the dark forest after nightfall. She could see the tower loom above the trees in the distance, but even though she walked towards it the distance never decreased.
She begged at the tower, “Master! I’m sorry! I’m scared! Save me!”
Her pleas went unheard and the young girl shrieked as the trees around her caved in. She covered her ears and ran blindly forward. The young girl ran into something solid and crumpled to the hard ground. She knew this was the end. A wild animal would kill her. But though she clenched her eyes shut for the wild animal’s blow, it did not come.
Next: Aozora's Warmth
05. Aozora's Loneliness
She watched through the eyes of a dirty young girl and yet, she also watched from far away, also removed from the emaciated body. The young girl had stolen something and hid under a cart in the crowded market to revel in her prize. She unwrapped the stolen bundle in her hand, expected coins or at least food, but saw that instead she had stolen a set of bones.
A man stepped up to the cart and with one flourish the cart fell apart above her. Fear coursed through her as she sat in the open. She turned to see the man she had stolen from. She met his bottomless eyes and fell into its depths. He studied her. Then he extended one hand.
"Come with me," the dark magician compelled her.
Somehow Ao knew, and later the young girl would find out, that the bones belonged to this man’s long dead lover.
*
As she regained consciousness, Ao felt the roughness of the uneven ground beneath her. She opened her eyes and saw sunlight filter through the boughs of the tree above her. She sighed deeply. She was herself, the princess of her kingdom, on her way to Lord Sakurai. Not the young girl.
"If we circle around, it'll add an extra four days to our journey, but it's still a safer course." FIVE's voice wafted to her.
Ao stilled and strained to catch their conversation.
"She won't last. Every day, her strength lessens. The princess is not used to such a hard, long journey," ONE countered.
His voice stirred a few more images in her mind and Ao did her best to suppress the nausea.
"Then we'll put her to sleep and carry her the rest of the way."
"That'll slow us down even more. And you and I need our strength, Jun."
Jun. FIVE's name was Jun. Weakly, Ao registered that into her mind, but she was still too tired to work through the implications.
"Then what do you propose we do? Lord Sakurai doesn’t know we’re coming. Continuing on our original path is a sure way to get ourselves killed."
Jun’s raised voice split her head in half. A groan escaped her lips and she gave up all pretense of sleep as she clutched her head. She heard the hurried shuffle of running feet and felt someone knelt by her side. A gentle hand overlapped hers. Warmth enveloped her and calmed her. Her headache eased away.
"Is she awake?" FIVE asked from behind his comrade.
Crouched beside her, ONE did not reply. Ao gave them their answer by opening her eyes and peering up at him hovered above her in concern. Their visors were still pulled down over their faces, but they were no longer just magician-warriors and her escorts. FIVE was Jun and Ao was sure Jun knew ONE’s name, too.
She found herself saying, almost without thinking, "Please, take the detour. I will make it. I don't want anyone to die."
*
Her nightmare still lingering the next day, she asked if one of her pursuers, or one of the conspirators against the king, was a powerful dark magician who lived in a tower. ONE who stayed with her that afternoon hesitated for a long time, long enough that she thought he would not answer her. But he did.
"Except for the Gold Magician who follows no one," he started in a mumble that she almost couldn't catch, "magicians of that caliber no longer exists, or they choose to remain hidden and isolated. Any magician with considerable power in this age is bonded to the service of a lord."
"Gold Magician," Ao murmured. She had heard of him before. Stories had been told of his mysterious reappearance every few hundred years to offer his services to particular people. He had appeared at the palace at her birth and had been the one to cast the protective wards around the palace, after all.
"FIVE and I will take care of any magic pursuers on our heels," ONE assured her with sudden confidence when she fell into contemplative silence.
Jun, her mind filled in the name and she obsessively wished she knew ONE’s name as well. Not heeding Jun’s advice, she watched him closely while he sharpened his dagger on a stick, threw the stick into the campfire, then brought out a brush to groom the horses. He brushed his horse first. Ao saw the gentle way he handled the creature. Then as he turned to Jun's horse, Ao stood and approached him slowly.
"Can I...?" she asked.
He turned his head and watched her from behind his visor. She wished she could see his face so she could read his expression. She pointed to the brush in his hand. She could tell he was surprised. ONE hesitated and stared at the brush for longer than necessary before he offered it to her. He stepped aside and allowed her to pull the brush through the horse’s mane. Ao was careful and attentive, afraid to hurt the animal. She brushed until the fine hairs became silky soft. Pleased, she glanced at ONE and found him caressing the horse not paying attention to her. He murmured to it quietly, so quietly that she did not catch his words. Her pulse quickened and she frowned. When she turned to groom her own horse, she realized she wished his kindness could be directed at her.
Jun saved them from the prolonged silence when he appeared from the forest with a handful of greens and a fat rabbit in his belt. ONE left her side and joined Jun near the edge of their camp. He gutted, skinned, and cleaned the rabbit, working efficiently and with skill that came with experience. Jun fished a metal pot from out of nowhere, boiled water, and washed the greens he had gathered in an also miraculously appearing bowl. In moments, the stew they had cooked up was boiling over their campfire. Jun pulled out a small bundle from their simple packs and added a few spices into the pot while ONE dug a hole under the roots of a tree with his dagger and buried the remains of the rabbit. Ao's stomach growled when the smell of their meal wafted to her.
Once he destroyed the rest of the evidence, ONE sat by Jun at the fire. She knew by the turn of his head that he noticed she had not joined them. ONE saw her by the horses where he had left her, but he turned back to the fire in front and ignored her. A painful, unrecognizable cry surged in her chest.
When the stew finished, Ao was given a large steaming portion in another bowl and spoon before her escorts turned their backs to her again. Ao felt alone even though they surrounded her. She knew she was, in reality, alone and that she shouldn’t be surprised. Ao reminded herself that ONE and Jun were there to guard her. They only did their duty to their lord, like the hundreds of servants back at the palace who also served her, but she couldn’t trick herself that being with these two were the same. They were different; somehow, more human. They worried about her.
Jun interrupted her isolated self-contemplation. “There is a small stream nearby, Princess,” he started. “Since we will not move until morning, you can wash. We will stand guard.”
*
Ao waded into the center of the stream. The crystal clear water only went up to her knees and she could see the rocks at the bottom. Their roughness bit into the soft soles of her bare feet and she winced when she stepped on a sharp edge. Upstream, ONE's back was turned to her. He crouched with his hands in the water, but even submerged she could see the red glow of fire in his hands. The water that flowed down to her was warm. Ao clutched her nakedness self consciously and bent to wash quickly. She scrubbed herself with a few herbs Jun had given her, glad to be finally rid of the grime that had accumulated in the last few days. Her eyes scanned the forest, wondering where Jun was. He had followed them, but along the way had faded into the forest to guard a wider circumference.
Ao felt tolerably cleaner once she finished and climbed back to the bank. Still damp, she pulled on her tunic and trousers. She addressed ONE whose back was still turned, "I'm done."
He nodded to her. She thought he would climb out and lead her back to their camp. Instead he pointed and gestured for her to move on as if he expected her to find her way back alone. He gestured again and Ao realized she hadn't misunderstood; he wanted her to leave without him. Reluctantly, Ao took a step inside the forest, suddenly dark and menacing now that the sun had set. She glanced back, wishing he'd show her the way, but ONE was no longer paying attention to her.
He had removed his helmet and armor and, as she watched stunned, stripped off his shirt to reveal his lean bodice and tanned skin. He was still turned and she only saw the back of his head and the deep black of his cropped hair. Her heart skipped. Her face burning, she ran into the forest before he caught her staring.
Fool, she called herself. He was washing. Was she so discourteous to watch him? Embarrassed and furious at herself, she stormed through the dark forest with no attention to where her footsteps led her. Jun suddenly stepped out in front of her. Ao jumped back in alarm and quickly covered her mouth although she had made no sound.
"Your highness, you're veering away from our camp." He pointed his arm to her left. "I'll lead you there."
*
Ao turned her back to Jun this time and sat by the fire to comb out her wet hair with her fingers. She was afraid he could read the guilt and embarrassment in her face and did not want to confess what she had seen. The long strands of her black hair were nearly dry when she finally looked back at Jun and saw ONE watching her where Jun had previously been. She had not noticed the switch and her heart raced at his sudden appearance, or so she told herself that was the only reason. Darkness consumed the world beyond their campsite, making the small space the two of them occupied intimate. In the awkwardness, Ao cleared her throat and spoke.
"You always build the fires,” she told him. “Can FIVE not conjure fire?" She did not actually doubt his ability. After all, even someone untrained like her knew how to call a flame.
Like always, ONE took a long time to answer. "He could, but fire is my specialty and he has his."
Ao couldn’t help but feel curiosity once he started and did not continue. “What is his?”
After a shorter pause, ONE said, "He can charm any animal."
She had read in the book she stole that there existed five forms of magic: the manipulation of fire, the manipulation of objects, the taming of beasts, mind coercion, and the most powerful and rare binding with the Earth. Skill determined the level of each form a magician could wield, but talent determined whether a magician could twist each form to his purpose.
*
In Ao’s dream, the young girl, now a few years older, ventured alone in the dark forest after nightfall. She could see the tower loom above the trees in the distance, but even though she walked towards it the distance never decreased.
She begged at the tower, “Master! I’m sorry! I’m scared! Save me!”
Her pleas went unheard and the young girl shrieked as the trees around her caved in. She covered her ears and ran blindly forward. The young girl ran into something solid and crumpled to the hard ground. She knew this was the end. A wild animal would kill her. But though she clenched her eyes shut for the wild animal’s blow, it did not come.
Next: Aozora's Warmth