Bits and Pieces 03
TWO
Bits and Pieces 03
01.
Seven years and they had never introduced each other to their families. Seven years and Ohno's family might have never known that Ohno had been living with a man. Seven years and Ohno had never come out about his sexuality to anyone other than their close knit unit of friends.
If Nino thought about it clearly, Watanabe Misako only knew about them because Ohno had always made sure that she was a part of their lives. Nino had never questioned Ohno's strong friendship with her because he had the same with Aiba. Or he had thought it'd been the same. One didn't get their best friend pregnant.
Nino stood alone in the middle of the apartment he had shared with Ohno. The things of his former lover's that he had destroyed were gone. Almost every trace of Ohno was gone. Even the walls had been repainted in his absence. The carpet had been changed and the furniture restored to their positions. Ohno had come and fixed everything, repaired the broken glass, and taken everything else with him. In just one week, the aftermath of what had transpired was gone.
Nino couldn't be thankful. Who had hurt whom? Why did Ohno assume he had the priviledge to leave, to be the one abandoning? Nino's possessions and most of the items of co-ownership were left alone, behind, appearing desolate and forgotten. Just like how he felt. There was nothing left for him here. Seven years of memories, buried, gone in just seven days.
"Kazu..." Aiba arrived at the open front door to see him standing motionlessly in the lonely sitting room.
Nino kept his gaze focused ahead at the white walls and beyond. "I threw away Ohno-san's utility knife once," he remembered. "He'd been working on a piece for months and every week he'd lock himself into his studio for days. He'd refuse to answer me then." He recalled the moment as he spoke, "And I threatened to carve my name over his heart. I told him I wondered if it'd start to hurt just a bit when he loses himself in his work and forgets about me. I wondered if he'd remember me because of the pain. It was a joke. I wasn't serious. But Ohno-san, he picked up the utility knife from the trash and gave it to me. He told me to do it."
Aiba listened quietly from inside the doorway.
Nino turned to catch his friend's eye and the look of solemnity that had overcome his expression. His hands shook and he folded his arms to steady them. He murmured, "If I had done it, maybe it would be hurting him now when he's trying to forget me. I wish I did."
Aiba wet his lips and still holding Nino's eyes he said softly, "It'll be just us again."
"Like it was in the beginning," Nino agreed. Before Sakurai. Before Ohno. Before all of the memories and pain.
"We'll be happy," Aiba tried to reassure him. "Tomorrow, I'll throw you a big welcoming party and we can get drunk together."
Nino nodded. "Just like the old days," he said.
02.
The following morning, Aiba completed his shift and bowed to his coworker who would remain behind fussing with small details at the counter. "Thank you for the good work today," Aiba said. "I'll see you tomorrow night, senpai."
The coworker acknowledged his bow and gestured for him to depart. "You're in a hurry, aren't you? You've been restless all night because of your new roommate."
Aiba bowed again and left through the door with bags of garbage in his hands. He dumped them and then stepped out of the alley. In front of the stairs leading down to the bar he worked at, he paused and turned his head up to the gray skies of early dawn. He took a deep breath of the fresh air. When he opened his eyes, he noticed that the billboard on top of the opposite building had changed. Sharp, handsome features stared back at him from a summery beachside. A charming smile graced the model's lips.
"Matsumoto-kun is as stunning as always," Aiba said with a smile. He recalled his friend telling him about a photoshoot in the countryside and he wondered if it'd been for this. He took out his phone, snapped a picture and sent it with a message to his modeling friend. It enthused him, as always, to revel and share his excitement about Matsumoto's success with the very person.
With a smile still on his lips, Aiba stowed his phone away and walked to the nearest bus.
03.
As soon as he opened the door of his apartment, a slipper came flying at him. Aiba failed to catch it and the back of the slipper slapped against his shoulder. He rubbed at it and made a face at Nino leisurely laying on his couch pressing the buttons of a console in his hand. Nino's feet were bare and the slipper that completed the one thrown at him were set on the floor beside the couch.
Aiba picked up the thrown slipper and walked into his apartment towards his friend. He returned the slipper and squeezed himself on the couch. Nino pulled up his legs to his chest to make more space for him to sit comfortably.
"Have you been playing games all day since you woke up?" Aiba asked as he watched the soldier move on the screen. "I know you'd rather spend your weekend gaming, but let's go do something outside for once."
Nino threw him a hard look. "First of all. You. Sleep. We can talk about that later."
Aiba rubbed at his tired eyes. He hadn't realized how exhausted he felt until Nino had said it. "But your welcoming party," he began.
"We can do that later. We have the entire night," Nino said.
"Okay," Aiba easily conceded and raised his legs onto the couch. He threw them over Nino's and arranged himself on the couch. However, Nino moved onto the floor, allowing Aiba to sleep more comfortably. Aiba gratefully made use of the freed space and sighed blissfully into the cushions. "Kazu, wake me up before it gets dark, okay? I promised we'd have a party."
"Sure," Nino nonchalantly answered.
A small part of Aiba wondered if his friend would be okay if he stopped watching for a moment. Nino's melancholy from the day before hadn't returned since, but he knew his friend liked to put up a strong front. After all, it'd been only one week and a day since Ohno left. Aiba was always afraid. Sleep caught up to him despite his worry and he closed his eyes on the sight of the back of his friend's head.
04.
In the darkness of his dreams, a voice spoke clearly:
I wondered if it'd start to hurt just a bit when he loses himself in his work and forgets about me. I wondered if he'd remember me because of the pain.
Aiba slowly opened his eyes to Nino hovering above him in the soft glow of the yellow lamps in his sitting room. Nino softly stroked his face and Aiba belatedly realized he had tears at the edges of his eyes. He quickly rubbed them away. He took a deep breath in an attempt to lessen the gaping wound in his chest.
"It's only me," Nino murmured and continued to caress his cheeks. "Sakurai-san isn't here."
"Did I call him in my sleep?" Aiba asked. "I'm sorry. I know he's not here." He couldn't even recall his dream except for the spoken words that had rang clearly from his memory.
Nino moved back and sighed. He sat back on his hands and stared intently at Aiba, quietly observing him. Then he said, "We're both strong, aren't we?"
Aiba remembered his worry earlier right before he'd fallen asleep. Pretend or not, at the core he wanted to believe that they could both move on.
"We are," he agreed.
FOUR
Bits and Pieces 03
01.
Seven years and they had never introduced each other to their families. Seven years and Ohno's family might have never known that Ohno had been living with a man. Seven years and Ohno had never come out about his sexuality to anyone other than their close knit unit of friends.
If Nino thought about it clearly, Watanabe Misako only knew about them because Ohno had always made sure that she was a part of their lives. Nino had never questioned Ohno's strong friendship with her because he had the same with Aiba. Or he had thought it'd been the same. One didn't get their best friend pregnant.
Nino stood alone in the middle of the apartment he had shared with Ohno. The things of his former lover's that he had destroyed were gone. Almost every trace of Ohno was gone. Even the walls had been repainted in his absence. The carpet had been changed and the furniture restored to their positions. Ohno had come and fixed everything, repaired the broken glass, and taken everything else with him. In just one week, the aftermath of what had transpired was gone.
Nino couldn't be thankful. Who had hurt whom? Why did Ohno assume he had the priviledge to leave, to be the one abandoning? Nino's possessions and most of the items of co-ownership were left alone, behind, appearing desolate and forgotten. Just like how he felt. There was nothing left for him here. Seven years of memories, buried, gone in just seven days.
"Kazu..." Aiba arrived at the open front door to see him standing motionlessly in the lonely sitting room.
Nino kept his gaze focused ahead at the white walls and beyond. "I threw away Ohno-san's utility knife once," he remembered. "He'd been working on a piece for months and every week he'd lock himself into his studio for days. He'd refuse to answer me then." He recalled the moment as he spoke, "And I threatened to carve my name over his heart. I told him I wondered if it'd start to hurt just a bit when he loses himself in his work and forgets about me. I wondered if he'd remember me because of the pain. It was a joke. I wasn't serious. But Ohno-san, he picked up the utility knife from the trash and gave it to me. He told me to do it."
Aiba listened quietly from inside the doorway.
Nino turned to catch his friend's eye and the look of solemnity that had overcome his expression. His hands shook and he folded his arms to steady them. He murmured, "If I had done it, maybe it would be hurting him now when he's trying to forget me. I wish I did."
Aiba wet his lips and still holding Nino's eyes he said softly, "It'll be just us again."
"Like it was in the beginning," Nino agreed. Before Sakurai. Before Ohno. Before all of the memories and pain.
"We'll be happy," Aiba tried to reassure him. "Tomorrow, I'll throw you a big welcoming party and we can get drunk together."
Nino nodded. "Just like the old days," he said.
02.
The following morning, Aiba completed his shift and bowed to his coworker who would remain behind fussing with small details at the counter. "Thank you for the good work today," Aiba said. "I'll see you tomorrow night, senpai."
The coworker acknowledged his bow and gestured for him to depart. "You're in a hurry, aren't you? You've been restless all night because of your new roommate."
Aiba bowed again and left through the door with bags of garbage in his hands. He dumped them and then stepped out of the alley. In front of the stairs leading down to the bar he worked at, he paused and turned his head up to the gray skies of early dawn. He took a deep breath of the fresh air. When he opened his eyes, he noticed that the billboard on top of the opposite building had changed. Sharp, handsome features stared back at him from a summery beachside. A charming smile graced the model's lips.
"Matsumoto-kun is as stunning as always," Aiba said with a smile. He recalled his friend telling him about a photoshoot in the countryside and he wondered if it'd been for this. He took out his phone, snapped a picture and sent it with a message to his modeling friend. It enthused him, as always, to revel and share his excitement about Matsumoto's success with the very person.
With a smile still on his lips, Aiba stowed his phone away and walked to the nearest bus.
03.
As soon as he opened the door of his apartment, a slipper came flying at him. Aiba failed to catch it and the back of the slipper slapped against his shoulder. He rubbed at it and made a face at Nino leisurely laying on his couch pressing the buttons of a console in his hand. Nino's feet were bare and the slipper that completed the one thrown at him were set on the floor beside the couch.
Aiba picked up the thrown slipper and walked into his apartment towards his friend. He returned the slipper and squeezed himself on the couch. Nino pulled up his legs to his chest to make more space for him to sit comfortably.
"Have you been playing games all day since you woke up?" Aiba asked as he watched the soldier move on the screen. "I know you'd rather spend your weekend gaming, but let's go do something outside for once."
Nino threw him a hard look. "First of all. You. Sleep. We can talk about that later."
Aiba rubbed at his tired eyes. He hadn't realized how exhausted he felt until Nino had said it. "But your welcoming party," he began.
"We can do that later. We have the entire night," Nino said.
"Okay," Aiba easily conceded and raised his legs onto the couch. He threw them over Nino's and arranged himself on the couch. However, Nino moved onto the floor, allowing Aiba to sleep more comfortably. Aiba gratefully made use of the freed space and sighed blissfully into the cushions. "Kazu, wake me up before it gets dark, okay? I promised we'd have a party."
"Sure," Nino nonchalantly answered.
A small part of Aiba wondered if his friend would be okay if he stopped watching for a moment. Nino's melancholy from the day before hadn't returned since, but he knew his friend liked to put up a strong front. After all, it'd been only one week and a day since Ohno left. Aiba was always afraid. Sleep caught up to him despite his worry and he closed his eyes on the sight of the back of his friend's head.
04.
In the darkness of his dreams, a voice spoke clearly:
I wondered if it'd start to hurt just a bit when he loses himself in his work and forgets about me. I wondered if he'd remember me because of the pain.
Aiba slowly opened his eyes to Nino hovering above him in the soft glow of the yellow lamps in his sitting room. Nino softly stroked his face and Aiba belatedly realized he had tears at the edges of his eyes. He quickly rubbed them away. He took a deep breath in an attempt to lessen the gaping wound in his chest.
"It's only me," Nino murmured and continued to caress his cheeks. "Sakurai-san isn't here."
"Did I call him in my sleep?" Aiba asked. "I'm sorry. I know he's not here." He couldn't even recall his dream except for the spoken words that had rang clearly from his memory.
Nino moved back and sighed. He sat back on his hands and stared intently at Aiba, quietly observing him. Then he said, "We're both strong, aren't we?"
Aiba remembered his worry earlier right before he'd fallen asleep. Pretend or not, at the core he wanted to believe that they could both move on.
"We are," he agreed.
FOUR