Sugar and Pepper (08)
Edited: 2012.07.21
SEVEN
* EIGHT *
01.
The dawn brought with it heavy clouds promising rain.
At the door, Mrs. Matsumoto advised her younger son to take his umbrella and he complied. Almost an hour later, she said the same thing to her elder son. As usual, he gave no response.
It was only after Satoshi had gone out that she realized they had never bought him one.
02.
During the school day, Satoshi was unbearably tired. He could not raise his head in class. His teachers noticed.
In second hour, the other students were independently solving a math problem when his teacher stopped at his desk and crouched down to whisper to him.
"Ohno, are you not feeling well?" she asked.
He shook his head at her.
"Would you like to go to the infirmary?" she continued.
He shook his head again.
"But if you're sick, you have to go," she told him.
"I'm fine," he murmured.
"Then keep your head up and don't sleep in class," his teacher said.
Satoshi continued to keep his head down.
03.
In the afternoon, rain poured from the darkened skies. The classes dimmed. Raindrops relentlessly pelted the window next to Satoshi, but he did not mind the noise, preferring the rain to his classmates.
Miyuki walked over and peered down at him anyway. "No lunch today?" she asked. He gave no answer. She sighed and pulled over a chair. "I've been wondering, Ohno, when is your brother's birthday?"
He still ignored her.
"Ohno?" she said.
Still nothing.
She gave up then. Exasperated, Miyuki pushed back and returned the chair. She left him with one last sentence, "It's not like it's our fault."
After her departure, Satoshi finally spoke, alone. He muttered so quietly that not even his ears could catch the words. "I know." More than anyone, he knew that he had a problem.
04.
The problem with being popular was receiving random emails from friends every few hours. They came from bored friends outside of his school, friends in his class that weren't paying attention to the lesson, and even from people he barely knew. Most of them said the same thing; that they were bored or cracking jokes about the teacher and other classmates. Jun usually skimmed them over, if he felt like it. He sometimes waited until the emails accumulated before reading.
That day, he waited until the last bell to open his phone. Going through the list, he realized that he had received one from his mother hours ago.
05.
Satoshi had hoped that by the end of the day, the rain had stopped. He hadn't brought an umbrella and the thought of arriving home wet to the core didn't bother him, but he knew his mother would be displeased. It was trouble he wanted to avoid on top of everything.
Beneath the roof at the shoe lockers, he stared at the steady rain and played with the idea of running home. But the thought of using that much energy displeased him. Even if he wanted to, it was already an effort for him to be standing. He just didn't have the strength to spare.
Satoshi sat underneath the roof and waited for the rain to cease. He hoped it would stop before nightfall at least. He didn't mind traveling home that late.
The other students had already left and the few stragglers were making their way out. None of them paid him the slightest attention. He was fine with that.
Alone, he leaned against the wall and stared at the open lot before him. He tried to stay awake, but the exhaustion he had felt all day returned. Despite the sound of the rain thundering in his ears, sleep had the better of him.
06.
A sudden movement woke him.
Satoshi came out of his sleep feeling the usual stiffness from his uncomfortable position. It took him a few seconds to remember where he was. To his disappointment, rain was still pouring, pelting the ground as relentlessly as before. Yet, the sky had darkened considerably. It had also gotten colder.
"Are you ready to leave now?" a familiar voice asked, and only then did he realize that there was someone there with him.
Jun sat next to Satoshi under the roof and he played with the handle of his umbrella. "Ready?" he asked again, abstaining from looking at the boy he addressed.
Satoshi stared in surprise. He wondered why Jun was there.
In the end, Jun turned to face him. "You sleep a lot," he said.
Satoshi felt the usual breathless sensation that came whenever his brother was involved. He realized his brother had been waiting for him. He almost choked when he asked, "Why are you here?"
Jun did not blink at the rare question, but he continued to play with his umbrella. "I realized something," he started. Again, he refused to look at Satoshi. "Do you know what your problem is?"
Satoshi wondered if he had to answer, but Jun replied for him. "I think you intentionally hurt yourself. As if you're punishing yourself."
Because he could not agree or disagree with that statement, Satoshi turned away.
Jun audibly sighed. "You are so troublesome," he muttered.
"Then why are you still here?" Satoshi mumbled. He thought his brother had given up long ago.
"I don't know why," Jun truthfully replied, yet he reached out and took the older boy's hand. Their hands fit together perfectly. It felt right even to Jun.
Satoshi bit his bottom lip, but he did not pull away.
"Let's go home," Jun said.
He led them out into the rain with the unfurled umbrella above them. They had to walk close together, but that did not bother either of them.
* *
NINE