Detention Challenge Fic: Sensitivity, (1/2), NC-17, Potter x Snape
Detention Challenge Fic: Sensitivity
Part (1/2)
Author: Shallow Blackkoda (blackkoda@yahoo.com)
Beta Team: Many, many thanks and cheers to the wonderful trio who helped me out with this: leianora, hel_bee and lexin
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Severus Snape/Harry Potter
Warnings: M-PREG, OOC, Fluff
Summary: Severus and Harry disagree about the nursery decorations for their unborn wizard.
Archives: Den of Shadows
Disclaimer: I make no profit from playing in J.K. Rowlings sandbox, no profit, no fame, and no harm meant to the franchise!
A/N: Written for Reddwarfer Detention fication, hope ya like it!
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Mordor was a pitch-black gyrfalcon, Falco rusticolus. Being one of the world’s larger birds of prey, Mordor had little to fear in the skies of Scotland. His wingspan measured just over five feet and with claws and a razor sharp beak, Mordor was a beautiful yet deadly creature…when he wasn’t carrying parcels.
Soaring to the highest tower of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Mordor gave a shrill cry. Owls with parchments, letters and parcels of their own got out of the way, fearful of the giant. His delivery was of a higher importance and their survival was not his concern. Mordor had the congeniality equal to that of his master, and Severus Snape did not have a tolerant disposition.
Flying over the balcony where the foul-tempered Potions master was taking his afternoon tea, Mordor dropped the package at a black-heeled boot. His mission complete, at least for the earlier part of the day, he found his perch and his food tray wherein two gray mice were his reward.
“Another parcel, I see.” Walking past Severus, Harry carried a tray of fruit and cheese. Taking the seat opposite Severus, he set the tray on the small table separating them. Having seen numerous parcels, both bigger and smaller over the past few months, Harry plucked up a strawberry and sighed.
“So observant.” Severus narrowed his eyes daring Harry to make the wrong comment.
Harry wasn't a fool and Severus was looking as if he needed only a hair of an excuse to fly into a rage. With a strained smile, he held out his hand and summoned the package.“Accio parcel," he murmured. "Let’s have a look shall we? Hmmm?” Untying the lavish, golden cord surrounding the box, Harry ripped the brown wrapping paper off and noted the white gift box underneath. Pharaoh’s Linens N' Things read the gold and blue letters upon the top and ornate flittering scarabs danced around the title. Harry had to bite his lip to prevent the groan that sought to rise from his lungs as he pulled the top off to reveal soft green bed linens. Harry saw that the bed linens, trimmed in silver, with phantom snakes shimmering and hissing throughout the fabric, were remarkable.
“For Sebastian’s crib.”
Severus had gone mad. Harry was sure of it. Harry stood with h is mouth agape as the soft fabric slid through his fingers. He noted the look of guilt just barely showing on Severus' features. “You know..." Harry ventured. "It’s not the fact that these are what…a hundred percent silk? No matter that they’re finer than our own sheets and spread... and I don't mind that they must have cost a pretty galleon, but what if the serpents scare him?”
“Don’t be absurd," Severus scoffed, taking a sudden interest in the fruit and cheese tray. Selecting a bit of hard cheddar, Severus rolled his eyes. "How could any child of ours be afraid of magical serpents? Would you rather have lions with gnashing teeth roaring at him?”
Ignoring the dramatics, Harry fitted the linens back into the box. It wasn't a matter of House groupings. Having come to the conclusion that personalities weren't so easily defined, Harry knew Severus was just taking a cheap shot. “Come off it. You know what I’d prefer.”
“Ah yes." Frowning distastefully, Severus recalled Harry's earlier wishes for their nursery. He had found the idea tawdry, casting it aside early on in his decorating. "Golden snitches, moons and stars-. How utterly unoriginal. Besides," he muttered through a mouth full of strawberries and cheese. "The nursery is my task. None of your concern at all…remember?”
“Actually," Harry corrected. "The agreement was made so that you wouldn’t be so bored, cranky and listless." Unable to brew even the simplest of potions due to his pregnancy, Severus had been forced to forego his usual method of relaxation. He hadn’t taken the news from Pomfrey well; and when Albus had suggested relocating his quarters, Severus had been irate. He could lecture, but he couldn't monitor any brewing. Severus had to insult and grade his students’ efforts from a distance of at least five feet. The dungeons wouldn't help his condition, and neither would the fumes of a cauldron. Needless to say, Severus was beside himself. His scathing insults and foul temper appeared with far more frequency than even Harry was used too and everyone in the castle knew what a grand feat that was. "Didn't know you'd take that so seriously,” Harry muttered under his breath.
Severus cocked his head at the grumbling, but couldn't comprehend the words as Mordor screeched behind him. “What was that, Potter?” he hissed.
Dear Merlin, Harry lamented internally. Whenever Severus reverted to using his patronymic, Harry knew the Potions Master was either incensed or amorous and Severus definitely didn’t look randy. “Severus, I... I just don’t want him to be spoiled.” Harry couldn’t meet his lover’s gaze.
Severus snapped, “And automatically you assume that comfortable sheets will do just that? Really Harry…”
“Comfortable sheets?” Head raised, Harry glared at Severus. To say that pregnancy had changed the once conservative wizard was an understatement. Other than black finery, potions ingredients and cauldrons, Severus had rarely tossed a careless coin before. Things had changed the minute after Poppy confirmed the pregnancy.
Harry had tried to ignore all of the extravagant gifts that filled their living quarters, but what had started off as an Atlas Cradle and a few expensive newborn robes had grown into a veritable tower of baby supplies. For Merlin’s sake, their child already had ten sets of cradle linens and that wasn’t counting the baby quilt that Hermione had knitted. Severus had suspiciously lost track of that. Still, things were getting a bit out of control as Mordor stretched his wings and took off to the skies- undoubtedly going to fetch another bundle.
“Sev,” Harry attempted calm. “There are at least two Celestial Globes, the Flying Miniature Pegasus, the Self-Changing Nappies, Seraphim’s Nursery Chants: Summoning Songs for Babes...all fourteen records! The gold Egyptian Snake rattle, not to mention all of the clothes. He’ll have more clothes than both of us combined. Just yesterday, I intercepted Mordor flying in with four pairs of Hephaestus’ Ever Warming booties.” Winded, Harry didn’t know how best to put his concerns as his Severus stared back indifferently. “I want the best for him too, but not just materially.”
Pursing his lips to prevent a barrage of obscenities eager to spill forth, Severus looked at Harry doubtfully. Harry was treading in waters that Severus considered long stagnant.
“There’s something to be said for humble beginnings, you know.” Waiting for some sort of response from the other father of his child, Harry could feel the heat of Severus’ ire building. The man had gone paler than usual and his eyes were narrowed into slits. Harry had to remind himself that the majority of the Wizarding World thought of him as ‘brave’ for a reason. Still, a pregnant man was no easy thing to reason with. Leaning across the table, Harry put his hand on Severus’ knee and tried to convey that he meant no harm. “You and I turned out just fine,” he tried.
Slapping Harry’s hand away, Severus was in no mood for coddling. He had heard the rubbish about humility making character before, often and from older men than Harry. The dolt should have felt differently considering that it was Albus’ subscription to the belief that lead to Harry’s miserable upbringing. Severus’ own father had also believed the same. Humble, indeed. “You and I are alike Harry. We’re together because of our rather dark, disturbing and otherwise perverse characters. I wouldn’t consider it fine.”
Rubbing his stinging hand, Harry backed off.
“Hand me downs, underpants gray and tattered, dingy quarters and cupboards,” Severus continued. “Oh yes, we had a few things in common, you and I. Our son will have much better than that and he will not be spoiled as he shall grow up knowing that his fathers’ were and are not pretentious fops.” Reaching over, Severus snatched the box from Harry’s lap. “He will not be called Snivellus.” Trying to lever himself out of his chair, Severus could hear the anger in his voice. It was thick with contempt for his old nickname. It was nearly time for his afternoon lessons and he didn’t have time to be bothered with Gryffindor morality.
Springing from his own chair, Harry moved in front of Severus in case help was needed to sit or stand. “Come on. Sev," he begged. Severus chose to stand regardless and Harry was there to help him up. "Don’t leave. You know me…open mouth insert foot.”
“Yes. Hopefully, Sebastian will not have that trait.” Taking Harry's arm with the intent of needing just a bit of aid, Severus rolled his eyes as Harry went one step further and slid his arm around Severus' back. Severus would have shooed Harry away, but it felt so good just being next to his foolish, idiotic Harry.
Harry did his best to look offended, but he’d become used to Severus' acidic tongue years ago.
Severus’ moods were unpredictable and fleeting, and whereas he would have never been moved by Harry's hurt look before, the chemical changes inside him had made him soft. The addition of Harry's hand upon his rounded stomach increased his sympathy. Lowering his head in a fall of shining black locks, Severus muttered, “It was a joke.”
“OK." It took Harry only seconds to smile. Holding Severus close, Harry buried his nose in dark hair that smelled of oatmeal and almond rather than potions fumes. Harry rather preferred the new scent. A lot. As Severus raised his head, pretending to shy away, Harry took the opportunity to taste the revealed line of his throat. "…I’m sorry. You decorate anyway you want to…”
“You can never fool me, you lecherous, perverted man." It was harmless nuzzling, a harmless kiss upon his jaw, the corners of his lips; Severus allowed it, sighing into the warm air. He allowed Harry a kiss upon the lips, allowed him to suck his tongue, moaned, as the sensations grew dizzy. However, the moment Harry's arm lowered and Harry's hand cupped his arse, Severus came back to his senses. “Are you mad! I have a class to teach in a matter of minutes." His push made Harry move away, but Severus regretted it as soon as the green-eyed wizard set him free. It was hard to remain stable after Harry's kisses but Severus tried. Flicking his hair out of his face, Severus composed himself. "No doubt the little cretins would be boiling Doppelganger solutions, trying their hands at love potions and burning holes through the stone floors if I were to be detained by my famous young lover.”
Harry wanted to do more than detain his pregnant lover. Between his job as an Auror and part-time Quidditch coach at Hogwarts, Harry treasured every moment he got with Severus. It used to be enough for him, a quickie here, hard shag there...and then Severus had revealed the Snape Family Curse. Pregnant, the Potions Master became a walking aphrodisiac. Severus' once sallow skin warmed with color, his once greasy hair grew thick and soft, and then there was the belly...Harry loved nothing more than caressing it, well almost nothing. Half-hard and strumming with warmth, Harry gave an excuse with all seriousness. "You could do with a lie in. Dumbledore would grant you-."
"Absolutely not! My class ends at four, my office hours end at six, and my Slytherins have my time until dinner. If you've no villains to hunt tonight, I'll be free then." Severus held onto his principles, even though the idea of lazing the day away in Potter's arms did sound appealing. Harry Potter may have been the Golden Boy, the savior of the Wizarding World and the cover boy of Witch Weekly every other month, but to Severus, the man was nothing less than wicked. Trying to bend down in order to reach the package on the chair, Severus gave up and gestured to it. "Please," he asked.
Harry retrieved the package swiftly enough, but it took some time to get to Severus' hand. Harry was too busy trying not to argue with a pregnant man. Using his last trump, Harry spoke nervously. "I resigned this morning. I'm no longer an Auror."
The news crept upon Severus like a thief, stealing his thoughts and his breath. Eyes wide, he looked into Harry's eyes expecting a hint of accusation. Instead, he read something vulnerable. The pull of family had apparently struck Harry as deeply as it had Severus. He wanted to stay, shirk his duties and revel in Harry’s web. Wicked. It certainly hadn’t taken much restraint during the times of war, but then Voldemort was long dead and Harry was of age, leaving Severus with abysmal resolve. "Well...” he spoke after a long pause. If he allowed it once, he’d allow it always, Severus decided. Without a backward glance, he started for the door. “Since you have newly acquired free time, you can help with the nursery."
Harry might have been stunned by the rejection if he hadn’t had fifteen years of experience dealing with Snape-the-authoritarian, his precious etiquette and blue balls.
***
Sitting guiltily in a hand-carved, self-rocking cherry wood chair, Hermione Granger-Weasley was ready to spring up at the first warning of Severus. Although she knew his schedule, his condition had made him more unpredictable. Her eyes alternating between the view of the doorway and Harry’s sorting spree, Hermione balked as Harry levitated another of Elves Finest feather soft, teddy bears into the give away pile. "Harry, Professor Snape will kill you if he finds out."
"He'll never notice, Hermione.” Exhausted already, Harry had been avoiding the nursery for the greater part of two weeks. It wasn’t until the Poseidon’s First miniature Jacuzzi arrived that he had decided to act. There was hardly space for it and Harry did have to admit it was something he wanted to keep. Other than that, the room was piled high with purchases that Severus had ordered. “Look at this.” Summoning another of Ollivander’s rattling wands to his hand, Harry couldn’t resist shaking it. Meant for an infant, the wand with a hollow, and the plastic-like sphere at the end was charmed to make lyrical rattling noises and create fairy dust. It was another item that Harry felt would have been nice, if there were only one. It was the sixth! Shaking the wand, Harry was unmoved by the display of blue and green sparkles spilling at his feet. “For Merlin's sake this is insane. He's mad, I tell you!"
Hermione tried not to laugh, but failed miserably. She didn’t know who was madder. Having been suspicious of Harry’s attraction to the venomous Potions master in the first place, she couldn’t now criticize Severus for changing. Besides which, Harry wouldn’t forget it if she did. He had been unpredictable and moody before even Harry and she had been first years. "Most pregnant people are, Harry.” Diverting the topic, she winced. “I'm sure if you were to talk to Ron, he'd agree. I've been knitting like crazy. My own nursery is a right mess and I’m just so excited. You’re going to have a family and that is such a special event. Snape has every right to go nuts and want to spoil him.”
“More than he’s spoiling me,” Harry griped under his breath. Even after his resignation from the Ministry and the increase in free time, Harry’s libido was under strain. Harry barely remembered the days and nights when all it took to ensnare the Severus was a glance. Now all a glance bought him was a sneer or a hand job if he was truly persistent.
“Did you say something?”
Harry shook his head deciding to keep those opinions to himself. He turned back to the pile of stuff and came across another teddy bear. Harry decided to keep it, but only because it was wearing Gryffindor robes. Harry figured that Severus must have been feeling overly sentimental when he ordered it. Moving it to the crib he had decided to keep, Harry placed it next to the Slytherin bear already inside. He only hoped that there would be room for the baby.
With Harry in a state, Hermione kept quiet; Harry didn’t need to hear what her intuition was telling her. If Molly hadn’t sat her down with Ron, she might not have known about her husband’s insecurities, worries and feelings. Still, Hermione knew that even offering Harry advice was an invitation to trouble, especially, if Snape found out. Easing back into the rocking chair, Hermione relaxed as much as she could. “Did Snape like the quilt?"
"He loved it.” Harry was swift to lie, not wanting to explain how Severus had misplaced it. His lover lost everything that he considered quaint or homely. Harry had been annoyed off, but couldn’t bring himself to argue. Severus was wearing the floor length black gown and had looked so edible, walking around the nursery with bare, chalk white feet that day. “Seriously, Hermione, anything you want from that pile. Shrink it and take it away. Never in a million years would I have expected this from him. The bitterness, the cruelty, the razor tongue and the dark…and the hot, sweaty, rough sex, yeah. But this?” Waving his hand to indicate the sorted piles, Harry didn't have the first explanation for his lover's shopping fetish. "This is out of control."
Still attempting to hang on to her neutrality, Hermione queried, “Have you told him that?"
“Yeah, but I don’t have to tell you who holds the reins of our relationship…when we’re not in bed that is.”
“Um…OK." Hermione winced, and not at the thought of Harry being intimate with her once-dreaded Potions Professor. Secretly; Hermione thought Severus had always been darkly attractive, seductive and mysterious. Despite the jokes, the comments about his hair and hygiene, she could see how his detached, worldly and almost dominant manner could appeal. She had seen love bruises covering Harry's throat, his collarbone and once even upon his wrists. She knew what Severus was capable of, but for Harry to admit to being dominant at all in bed with Severus really made her nervous in ways her husband would definitely not approve of.
Oblivious to Hermione's blushing, Harry spelled the infant robes that he had decided to keep, to fold themselves. Just seeing the little jumpers, trousers, babygrows, gowns and robes served to remind him that in less than four months, there would be another being in their lives. As much as he told himself that jealousy was absurd, Harry could call the twinge inside his chest by no other name. Severus and he would have less time together, less private time and having been denied it as a child, intimacy was important to Harry. But then, Harry reminded himself that he was gaining a family. He wanted Sebastian, wanted to meet, care for and to love him. Shaking his head to rid his mind of complexities he had yet to face, Harry mused aloud, “You know when I’m with him, I don’t feel famous at all. That used to be a good thing but… well I suppose he and I should deal with all this before Sebastian is born. Merlin, he'll be wanting to deal with it tonight after he sees what I've done to the nursery.”
Hermione nodded, her eye catching an embroidered child sling imported from Kenya. Picking up the box it set inside, she lifted the firmly woven garment out and examined the sturdy design that allowed a child to be carried on either the front or back of its carrier.
"You can have that if you want it. I'll not have Severus teaching potions with our son strapped to him," Harry commented upon noticing his friend's distraction. "I have to put my foot down."
They were not poor by any means, Ron's job at the Ministry and her own employment as Professor of Muggle Studies gave Hermione a more than comfortable living. Still Harry's offer was quite tempting. Severus had gone for the best of everything. Wavering, Hermione replied, "...I don't know. I mean it is very nice, and there are no fumes to worry about during my classes."
"So have it. There's another in the pile somewhere," Harry motioned to the substantial heap of items next to Hermione's chair, all of them designated as giveaways. Harry's placement of the giveaways had been intentional. Watching, as Hermione appeared to give in, he levitated another of the wand rattles over to his friend. "You might as well. There is simply not enough room for all of this stuff and I intend to make a hefty donation to the orphanage before the day is out." Declaring his intent, Harry was oblivious to the dark presence standing in the doorway.
"Do you really, now?" Severus sneered; his dark eyes narrow slits.
Hermione gasped, dropping the sling as her gaze shot over to the furious man, standing with his arms crossed above his round stomach. "Professor!"
"Severus!" Harry gasped, wondering what good it was to be so powerful a wizard, such an experienced ex-Auror and to still be caught unaware by Severus. Refusing to let nervousness or fear show, Harry struggled against the hot look directed straight at him. "You're early."
Severus had no words for Harry, although his mouth was pinched tightly shut with the heat and the air needed to fuel flames. Turning to the pregnant witch occupying his rocking chair, Severus gave a poisonous smile. "Professor Granger-Weasley. So nice to see you… I trust all is well with your pregnancy?"
"Oh yes," Hermione stammered. "Those nutritional calming draughts you prepared should be patented. They're absolutely miraculous and the balm for my skin...Well it's divine. You really should open your own shop!"
Severus rolled his eyes at the rambling. With a heavy sigh, he interrupted, "I’m flattered. Now might I have a word alone with my...lover?"
"Oh certainly.” The tension in the air was as heavy as a spell and Hermione had no doubt that Severus would curse Harry out whether or not she chose to leave. Severus’ real question, the one behind his words, was whether she wanted a sound cursing as well. Getting up from the chair, with some difficulty, Hermione tucked the sling into the folds of her robe. Casting a sympathetic glance at Harry, she noted that his eyes were locked onto Severus’ as if the two had already begun their confrontation. “It is late and I should be getting on,” she murmured heading to the door. “Harry, do fire call me."
"Sure thing, Hermione." Harry heard himself reply. Glaring at Severus, Harry felt the searing heat of Severus’ glare on his cheeks, had lost himself in black pools so much so that only the sound of the door shutting could free him.
Severus didn’t know where to begin. The nerve of Potter giving their child’s things away, and without even consulting him, to the Granger-Weasley wench! It made no difference that her belly was nearly as round as his and that it was inevitable that their children would grow up together. What mattered were Potter’s outright assumptions, indifference even. It needed to be dealt with then and there, Severus vowed but before he could stamp his anger down enough to speak, Harry turned away from him.
"I've put away most of the toys and assembled the shelves and the furniture. I’ve fit as many of his outfits into the cupboards, chest and trunk that will fit. I'm leaving the walls, the ceiling and the decorating to you.” Rambling on, Harry hoped that Severus would see reason. “I've been quite busy.”
Looking around the nursery, Severus cooled only slightly at the sense of order and open space. “How obvious,” he stated through clenched teeth.
Why was it that no one believed that Severus Snape was a pushy, fucking bottom, Harry mused with his own anger flaring? He could still recall Ron’s reaction upon finding out who Harry’s secret lover was. Ron had accused Severus of being manipulative, a sodding pervert who just wanted to bugger Harry. Harry had gone white when Severus corrected Ron’s assumptions with, “No, Mr. Weasley, it is your precious idol that prefers to do the buggering and he’s rather demanding about it.” Yes, Harry was a top and he tried to remember that as he raised his chin to his silent lover, speaking boldly, “You have something you want to say to me, Severus?"
"Oh but I do, Potter," Severus hissed back.
***
Sitting in the midst of The Three Broomsticks pub, Harry Potter drew no admirers swooning, no over-anxious fans looking for signatures. The look on his tired face was enough to keep them at bay as he sat hunched over his firewhisky.
Looking up at his drinking mate, Harry sighed, "He likes the nursery. I had to sleep on the couch for the last two nights but he likes it. He thinks that the floor being clear of boxes is a good start."
"Well, it wasn't all bollocks then." Ron Weasley cast a worried glance over the man who had been his best friend since first year, the man whom he thought he knew. It was not a matter of Harry's sexual orientation that bothered him. After all, his brother Percy was gay. The deviance that Harry alluded to was also not the issue; Ron had dealt with that as well. Accidentally walking in on one of Fred and George's threesomes, Ron was no prude. He didn't go in for all that but well, everyone had their own tastes. Snape however… Harry's attraction to him was a bit much but what were friends for if not being understanding? Shivering, he brought his mug up for another strong pull.
"It's murder, is what it is," Harry corrected on the edge of being pissed. "He thinks I'm being too bossy, thinks I'm going to be jealous of my own son and that's why I don't want Sebastian wearing robes that cost more than most peoples weekly wage." Paraphrasing the argument, Harry scowled. Ron didn't need to know how Severus had gone on to counter with the fact that his family had a lot more money than the average wizard and that the fortune of the Snape family was doing no good rotting away in Gringotts. Harry also neglected the part about both Snape and Harry having been ridiculed for their homeliness. Good arguments, but not the point Harry was interested in. In all honesty, Harry admitted, "I want to spoil him too, just...well, I need some spoiling too."
"Oi," Ron cringed, not willing to delve into that discussion. "Thanks for all the things you sent," he said, hoping to change the subject. "They were brill!"
Harry nodded, gave a weak grin.
His ploy crushed, Ron tried to sound sympathetic. "Don't look so down, Harry. I would say that you know what Snape is like... but, well, you do."
"Yeah, sometimes I know him too well." Harry knew for example that, Severus would not be pleased by him returning home drunk. The hangover potion brewed by his lover was not in his pocket by chance. Severus would probably know anyway, but since Harry had been assigned the couch, he didn't think that he could get close enough for Severus to be able to tell. Looking down into his mug, Harry was lucid enough to ask the sensitive question. "Do you ever think that you'll be jealous of your child? I mean once Hermione gives birth, I mean...well you know things will change, but-."
"Got some news for you, Harry. Things have already changed." It was a hard truth for some men, pregnancy, particularly those of the more precocious sort, but Ron didn't add that. Harry had been worse than a late bloomer and Ron had wondered for years whether his friend would ever find someone. Then came the mysterious absences, the secretive meetings and the bite marks. Ron would ask for the name of Harry’s secret lover, but Harry would deny him at every chance, saying only that he was addicted. Ron had doubted it was that extreme. His doubt turned to disbelief when Harry revealed his lover to be none other than their ex-Potions Professor. However it had been years since Harry’s revelation and Ron was beginning to believe that perhaps Harry really was addicted, bewitched…under Imperius. Nervous about comparing his own experiences to Harry’s, Ron supposed, "You're worried that Severus won't have time for you?"
"That, yes!” Harry exclaimed. Hearing it expressed aloud and from someone other than his psyche made him feel less paranoid. “That Severus will love Sebastian so much more than me... Merlin! I feel like a right shit for even thinking it."
"Nah mate, it's natural. All blokes feel like that. Me too," he grimaced. Nothing was ever natural, or easy or even normal with Harry.
Needing all the advice he could get, Harry leaned in. "Well, how do you deal with it?"
“I try to think of it like this: the child will be both my responsibility and Hermione's. He’ll be an extension of our love not an impediment. We’ll have time together, and my mum and dad will help. Hell, they’ll help you too.” Ron doubted that Severus would allow it, but at least the offer was on the table. Holding his empty mug up for the flying pitcher to refill, Ron waited until she finished before getting serious. “Your problem is that because Severus is carrying your child, he has the bigger responsibility. To say he’s the isolated and independent sort would be putting it mildly, but if you want him you’re going to have to think a little less about yourself and more about him and the baby. The rewards will be greater, trust me. If not, you’ll have worse things to worry about than not shagging. Severus seems like the sort who would have no problems raising a child alone; Bill’s girlfriends didn’t."
Harry stiffened at the comparison. Bill Weasley had made it quite public that he wasn’t ready for children, despite having four offspring on three different continents. Harry was not that sort of man and had no inclination to be so. While Bill liked variety, Harry felt strongly for only one person and the thought of losing Severus was enough for him to quash any guilty offense he might have felt at Ron’s straightforwardness. "I want them both, Ron. I do…” Harry tried and failed to sound convincing. Staring down into his whiskey, Harry suddenly wanted a refill. “Maybe I am being a twit,” he sulked.
Pitying his friend, Ron reached over and gave Harry a pat on the shoulder. "Don’t be so hard on yourself, Harry. Let Severus spend as much as he wants on the baby, but you spend as much as you want on him. I found that massages and Honeyduke’s chocolates work well…with Hermione. I don’t know; maybe get Snape some kind of potion or something like that. But be patient.” He chuckled as Harry’s mood grew lighter, shoulders more relaxed. It showed that he was listening at least. “Maturity doesn’t come overnight and heh, we’re men. Even Severus."
"Depending on the day of the week, he's a right bitch,” said Harry with a grin. If Ron was hopeful, then Harry had to be, especially considering that Ron and Severus were hardly ever on speaking terms. No, Ron was giving him good advice, Harry was sure. He had been right to put his foot down about the nursery, but he needed to show Severus that he was serious, that he could be loving in a way that didn't include fucking over a desk, ripped clothing or bruises. Harry resigned to ply Severus with sweetness and in his drunken haze, Harry smiled broadly. "I love him Ron," Harry mused. "I think I'm going to ask him to be my bondmate."
Having just taken a hearty swig of pint of bitter, Ron spewed it half across the table. "Harry, life is never dull when you're around."
***
Part (1/2)
Author: Shallow Blackkoda (blackkoda@yahoo.com)
Beta Team: Many, many thanks and cheers to the wonderful trio who helped me out with this: leianora, hel_bee and lexin
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Severus Snape/Harry Potter
Warnings: M-PREG, OOC, Fluff
Summary: Severus and Harry disagree about the nursery decorations for their unborn wizard.
Archives: Den of Shadows
Disclaimer: I make no profit from playing in J.K. Rowlings sandbox, no profit, no fame, and no harm meant to the franchise!
A/N: Written for Reddwarfer Detention fication, hope ya like it!
***
***
Mordor was a pitch-black gyrfalcon, Falco rusticolus. Being one of the world’s larger birds of prey, Mordor had little to fear in the skies of Scotland. His wingspan measured just over five feet and with claws and a razor sharp beak, Mordor was a beautiful yet deadly creature…when he wasn’t carrying parcels.
Soaring to the highest tower of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Mordor gave a shrill cry. Owls with parchments, letters and parcels of their own got out of the way, fearful of the giant. His delivery was of a higher importance and their survival was not his concern. Mordor had the congeniality equal to that of his master, and Severus Snape did not have a tolerant disposition.
Flying over the balcony where the foul-tempered Potions master was taking his afternoon tea, Mordor dropped the package at a black-heeled boot. His mission complete, at least for the earlier part of the day, he found his perch and his food tray wherein two gray mice were his reward.
“Another parcel, I see.” Walking past Severus, Harry carried a tray of fruit and cheese. Taking the seat opposite Severus, he set the tray on the small table separating them. Having seen numerous parcels, both bigger and smaller over the past few months, Harry plucked up a strawberry and sighed.
“So observant.” Severus narrowed his eyes daring Harry to make the wrong comment.
Harry wasn't a fool and Severus was looking as if he needed only a hair of an excuse to fly into a rage. With a strained smile, he held out his hand and summoned the package.“Accio parcel," he murmured. "Let’s have a look shall we? Hmmm?” Untying the lavish, golden cord surrounding the box, Harry ripped the brown wrapping paper off and noted the white gift box underneath. Pharaoh’s Linens N' Things read the gold and blue letters upon the top and ornate flittering scarabs danced around the title. Harry had to bite his lip to prevent the groan that sought to rise from his lungs as he pulled the top off to reveal soft green bed linens. Harry saw that the bed linens, trimmed in silver, with phantom snakes shimmering and hissing throughout the fabric, were remarkable.
“For Sebastian’s crib.”
Severus had gone mad. Harry was sure of it. Harry stood with h is mouth agape as the soft fabric slid through his fingers. He noted the look of guilt just barely showing on Severus' features. “You know..." Harry ventured. "It’s not the fact that these are what…a hundred percent silk? No matter that they’re finer than our own sheets and spread... and I don't mind that they must have cost a pretty galleon, but what if the serpents scare him?”
“Don’t be absurd," Severus scoffed, taking a sudden interest in the fruit and cheese tray. Selecting a bit of hard cheddar, Severus rolled his eyes. "How could any child of ours be afraid of magical serpents? Would you rather have lions with gnashing teeth roaring at him?”
Ignoring the dramatics, Harry fitted the linens back into the box. It wasn't a matter of House groupings. Having come to the conclusion that personalities weren't so easily defined, Harry knew Severus was just taking a cheap shot. “Come off it. You know what I’d prefer.”
“Ah yes." Frowning distastefully, Severus recalled Harry's earlier wishes for their nursery. He had found the idea tawdry, casting it aside early on in his decorating. "Golden snitches, moons and stars-. How utterly unoriginal. Besides," he muttered through a mouth full of strawberries and cheese. "The nursery is my task. None of your concern at all…remember?”
“Actually," Harry corrected. "The agreement was made so that you wouldn’t be so bored, cranky and listless." Unable to brew even the simplest of potions due to his pregnancy, Severus had been forced to forego his usual method of relaxation. He hadn’t taken the news from Pomfrey well; and when Albus had suggested relocating his quarters, Severus had been irate. He could lecture, but he couldn't monitor any brewing. Severus had to insult and grade his students’ efforts from a distance of at least five feet. The dungeons wouldn't help his condition, and neither would the fumes of a cauldron. Needless to say, Severus was beside himself. His scathing insults and foul temper appeared with far more frequency than even Harry was used too and everyone in the castle knew what a grand feat that was. "Didn't know you'd take that so seriously,” Harry muttered under his breath.
Severus cocked his head at the grumbling, but couldn't comprehend the words as Mordor screeched behind him. “What was that, Potter?” he hissed.
Dear Merlin, Harry lamented internally. Whenever Severus reverted to using his patronymic, Harry knew the Potions Master was either incensed or amorous and Severus definitely didn’t look randy. “Severus, I... I just don’t want him to be spoiled.” Harry couldn’t meet his lover’s gaze.
Severus snapped, “And automatically you assume that comfortable sheets will do just that? Really Harry…”
“Comfortable sheets?” Head raised, Harry glared at Severus. To say that pregnancy had changed the once conservative wizard was an understatement. Other than black finery, potions ingredients and cauldrons, Severus had rarely tossed a careless coin before. Things had changed the minute after Poppy confirmed the pregnancy.
Harry had tried to ignore all of the extravagant gifts that filled their living quarters, but what had started off as an Atlas Cradle and a few expensive newborn robes had grown into a veritable tower of baby supplies. For Merlin’s sake, their child already had ten sets of cradle linens and that wasn’t counting the baby quilt that Hermione had knitted. Severus had suspiciously lost track of that. Still, things were getting a bit out of control as Mordor stretched his wings and took off to the skies- undoubtedly going to fetch another bundle.
“Sev,” Harry attempted calm. “There are at least two Celestial Globes, the Flying Miniature Pegasus, the Self-Changing Nappies, Seraphim’s Nursery Chants: Summoning Songs for Babes...all fourteen records! The gold Egyptian Snake rattle, not to mention all of the clothes. He’ll have more clothes than both of us combined. Just yesterday, I intercepted Mordor flying in with four pairs of Hephaestus’ Ever Warming booties.” Winded, Harry didn’t know how best to put his concerns as his Severus stared back indifferently. “I want the best for him too, but not just materially.”
Pursing his lips to prevent a barrage of obscenities eager to spill forth, Severus looked at Harry doubtfully. Harry was treading in waters that Severus considered long stagnant.
“There’s something to be said for humble beginnings, you know.” Waiting for some sort of response from the other father of his child, Harry could feel the heat of Severus’ ire building. The man had gone paler than usual and his eyes were narrowed into slits. Harry had to remind himself that the majority of the Wizarding World thought of him as ‘brave’ for a reason. Still, a pregnant man was no easy thing to reason with. Leaning across the table, Harry put his hand on Severus’ knee and tried to convey that he meant no harm. “You and I turned out just fine,” he tried.
Slapping Harry’s hand away, Severus was in no mood for coddling. He had heard the rubbish about humility making character before, often and from older men than Harry. The dolt should have felt differently considering that it was Albus’ subscription to the belief that lead to Harry’s miserable upbringing. Severus’ own father had also believed the same. Humble, indeed. “You and I are alike Harry. We’re together because of our rather dark, disturbing and otherwise perverse characters. I wouldn’t consider it fine.”
Rubbing his stinging hand, Harry backed off.
“Hand me downs, underpants gray and tattered, dingy quarters and cupboards,” Severus continued. “Oh yes, we had a few things in common, you and I. Our son will have much better than that and he will not be spoiled as he shall grow up knowing that his fathers’ were and are not pretentious fops.” Reaching over, Severus snatched the box from Harry’s lap. “He will not be called Snivellus.” Trying to lever himself out of his chair, Severus could hear the anger in his voice. It was thick with contempt for his old nickname. It was nearly time for his afternoon lessons and he didn’t have time to be bothered with Gryffindor morality.
Springing from his own chair, Harry moved in front of Severus in case help was needed to sit or stand. “Come on. Sev," he begged. Severus chose to stand regardless and Harry was there to help him up. "Don’t leave. You know me…open mouth insert foot.”
“Yes. Hopefully, Sebastian will not have that trait.” Taking Harry's arm with the intent of needing just a bit of aid, Severus rolled his eyes as Harry went one step further and slid his arm around Severus' back. Severus would have shooed Harry away, but it felt so good just being next to his foolish, idiotic Harry.
Harry did his best to look offended, but he’d become used to Severus' acidic tongue years ago.
Severus’ moods were unpredictable and fleeting, and whereas he would have never been moved by Harry's hurt look before, the chemical changes inside him had made him soft. The addition of Harry's hand upon his rounded stomach increased his sympathy. Lowering his head in a fall of shining black locks, Severus muttered, “It was a joke.”
“OK." It took Harry only seconds to smile. Holding Severus close, Harry buried his nose in dark hair that smelled of oatmeal and almond rather than potions fumes. Harry rather preferred the new scent. A lot. As Severus raised his head, pretending to shy away, Harry took the opportunity to taste the revealed line of his throat. "…I’m sorry. You decorate anyway you want to…”
“You can never fool me, you lecherous, perverted man." It was harmless nuzzling, a harmless kiss upon his jaw, the corners of his lips; Severus allowed it, sighing into the warm air. He allowed Harry a kiss upon the lips, allowed him to suck his tongue, moaned, as the sensations grew dizzy. However, the moment Harry's arm lowered and Harry's hand cupped his arse, Severus came back to his senses. “Are you mad! I have a class to teach in a matter of minutes." His push made Harry move away, but Severus regretted it as soon as the green-eyed wizard set him free. It was hard to remain stable after Harry's kisses but Severus tried. Flicking his hair out of his face, Severus composed himself. "No doubt the little cretins would be boiling Doppelganger solutions, trying their hands at love potions and burning holes through the stone floors if I were to be detained by my famous young lover.”
Harry wanted to do more than detain his pregnant lover. Between his job as an Auror and part-time Quidditch coach at Hogwarts, Harry treasured every moment he got with Severus. It used to be enough for him, a quickie here, hard shag there...and then Severus had revealed the Snape Family Curse. Pregnant, the Potions Master became a walking aphrodisiac. Severus' once sallow skin warmed with color, his once greasy hair grew thick and soft, and then there was the belly...Harry loved nothing more than caressing it, well almost nothing. Half-hard and strumming with warmth, Harry gave an excuse with all seriousness. "You could do with a lie in. Dumbledore would grant you-."
"Absolutely not! My class ends at four, my office hours end at six, and my Slytherins have my time until dinner. If you've no villains to hunt tonight, I'll be free then." Severus held onto his principles, even though the idea of lazing the day away in Potter's arms did sound appealing. Harry Potter may have been the Golden Boy, the savior of the Wizarding World and the cover boy of Witch Weekly every other month, but to Severus, the man was nothing less than wicked. Trying to bend down in order to reach the package on the chair, Severus gave up and gestured to it. "Please," he asked.
Harry retrieved the package swiftly enough, but it took some time to get to Severus' hand. Harry was too busy trying not to argue with a pregnant man. Using his last trump, Harry spoke nervously. "I resigned this morning. I'm no longer an Auror."
The news crept upon Severus like a thief, stealing his thoughts and his breath. Eyes wide, he looked into Harry's eyes expecting a hint of accusation. Instead, he read something vulnerable. The pull of family had apparently struck Harry as deeply as it had Severus. He wanted to stay, shirk his duties and revel in Harry’s web. Wicked. It certainly hadn’t taken much restraint during the times of war, but then Voldemort was long dead and Harry was of age, leaving Severus with abysmal resolve. "Well...” he spoke after a long pause. If he allowed it once, he’d allow it always, Severus decided. Without a backward glance, he started for the door. “Since you have newly acquired free time, you can help with the nursery."
Harry might have been stunned by the rejection if he hadn’t had fifteen years of experience dealing with Snape-the-authoritarian, his precious etiquette and blue balls.
***
Sitting guiltily in a hand-carved, self-rocking cherry wood chair, Hermione Granger-Weasley was ready to spring up at the first warning of Severus. Although she knew his schedule, his condition had made him more unpredictable. Her eyes alternating between the view of the doorway and Harry’s sorting spree, Hermione balked as Harry levitated another of Elves Finest feather soft, teddy bears into the give away pile. "Harry, Professor Snape will kill you if he finds out."
"He'll never notice, Hermione.” Exhausted already, Harry had been avoiding the nursery for the greater part of two weeks. It wasn’t until the Poseidon’s First miniature Jacuzzi arrived that he had decided to act. There was hardly space for it and Harry did have to admit it was something he wanted to keep. Other than that, the room was piled high with purchases that Severus had ordered. “Look at this.” Summoning another of Ollivander’s rattling wands to his hand, Harry couldn’t resist shaking it. Meant for an infant, the wand with a hollow, and the plastic-like sphere at the end was charmed to make lyrical rattling noises and create fairy dust. It was another item that Harry felt would have been nice, if there were only one. It was the sixth! Shaking the wand, Harry was unmoved by the display of blue and green sparkles spilling at his feet. “For Merlin's sake this is insane. He's mad, I tell you!"
Hermione tried not to laugh, but failed miserably. She didn’t know who was madder. Having been suspicious of Harry’s attraction to the venomous Potions master in the first place, she couldn’t now criticize Severus for changing. Besides which, Harry wouldn’t forget it if she did. He had been unpredictable and moody before even Harry and she had been first years. "Most pregnant people are, Harry.” Diverting the topic, she winced. “I'm sure if you were to talk to Ron, he'd agree. I've been knitting like crazy. My own nursery is a right mess and I’m just so excited. You’re going to have a family and that is such a special event. Snape has every right to go nuts and want to spoil him.”
“More than he’s spoiling me,” Harry griped under his breath. Even after his resignation from the Ministry and the increase in free time, Harry’s libido was under strain. Harry barely remembered the days and nights when all it took to ensnare the Severus was a glance. Now all a glance bought him was a sneer or a hand job if he was truly persistent.
“Did you say something?”
Harry shook his head deciding to keep those opinions to himself. He turned back to the pile of stuff and came across another teddy bear. Harry decided to keep it, but only because it was wearing Gryffindor robes. Harry figured that Severus must have been feeling overly sentimental when he ordered it. Moving it to the crib he had decided to keep, Harry placed it next to the Slytherin bear already inside. He only hoped that there would be room for the baby.
With Harry in a state, Hermione kept quiet; Harry didn’t need to hear what her intuition was telling her. If Molly hadn’t sat her down with Ron, she might not have known about her husband’s insecurities, worries and feelings. Still, Hermione knew that even offering Harry advice was an invitation to trouble, especially, if Snape found out. Easing back into the rocking chair, Hermione relaxed as much as she could. “Did Snape like the quilt?"
"He loved it.” Harry was swift to lie, not wanting to explain how Severus had misplaced it. His lover lost everything that he considered quaint or homely. Harry had been annoyed off, but couldn’t bring himself to argue. Severus was wearing the floor length black gown and had looked so edible, walking around the nursery with bare, chalk white feet that day. “Seriously, Hermione, anything you want from that pile. Shrink it and take it away. Never in a million years would I have expected this from him. The bitterness, the cruelty, the razor tongue and the dark…and the hot, sweaty, rough sex, yeah. But this?” Waving his hand to indicate the sorted piles, Harry didn't have the first explanation for his lover's shopping fetish. "This is out of control."
Still attempting to hang on to her neutrality, Hermione queried, “Have you told him that?"
“Yeah, but I don’t have to tell you who holds the reins of our relationship…when we’re not in bed that is.”
“Um…OK." Hermione winced, and not at the thought of Harry being intimate with her once-dreaded Potions Professor. Secretly; Hermione thought Severus had always been darkly attractive, seductive and mysterious. Despite the jokes, the comments about his hair and hygiene, she could see how his detached, worldly and almost dominant manner could appeal. She had seen love bruises covering Harry's throat, his collarbone and once even upon his wrists. She knew what Severus was capable of, but for Harry to admit to being dominant at all in bed with Severus really made her nervous in ways her husband would definitely not approve of.
Oblivious to Hermione's blushing, Harry spelled the infant robes that he had decided to keep, to fold themselves. Just seeing the little jumpers, trousers, babygrows, gowns and robes served to remind him that in less than four months, there would be another being in their lives. As much as he told himself that jealousy was absurd, Harry could call the twinge inside his chest by no other name. Severus and he would have less time together, less private time and having been denied it as a child, intimacy was important to Harry. But then, Harry reminded himself that he was gaining a family. He wanted Sebastian, wanted to meet, care for and to love him. Shaking his head to rid his mind of complexities he had yet to face, Harry mused aloud, “You know when I’m with him, I don’t feel famous at all. That used to be a good thing but… well I suppose he and I should deal with all this before Sebastian is born. Merlin, he'll be wanting to deal with it tonight after he sees what I've done to the nursery.”
Hermione nodded, her eye catching an embroidered child sling imported from Kenya. Picking up the box it set inside, she lifted the firmly woven garment out and examined the sturdy design that allowed a child to be carried on either the front or back of its carrier.
"You can have that if you want it. I'll not have Severus teaching potions with our son strapped to him," Harry commented upon noticing his friend's distraction. "I have to put my foot down."
They were not poor by any means, Ron's job at the Ministry and her own employment as Professor of Muggle Studies gave Hermione a more than comfortable living. Still Harry's offer was quite tempting. Severus had gone for the best of everything. Wavering, Hermione replied, "...I don't know. I mean it is very nice, and there are no fumes to worry about during my classes."
"So have it. There's another in the pile somewhere," Harry motioned to the substantial heap of items next to Hermione's chair, all of them designated as giveaways. Harry's placement of the giveaways had been intentional. Watching, as Hermione appeared to give in, he levitated another of the wand rattles over to his friend. "You might as well. There is simply not enough room for all of this stuff and I intend to make a hefty donation to the orphanage before the day is out." Declaring his intent, Harry was oblivious to the dark presence standing in the doorway.
"Do you really, now?" Severus sneered; his dark eyes narrow slits.
Hermione gasped, dropping the sling as her gaze shot over to the furious man, standing with his arms crossed above his round stomach. "Professor!"
"Severus!" Harry gasped, wondering what good it was to be so powerful a wizard, such an experienced ex-Auror and to still be caught unaware by Severus. Refusing to let nervousness or fear show, Harry struggled against the hot look directed straight at him. "You're early."
Severus had no words for Harry, although his mouth was pinched tightly shut with the heat and the air needed to fuel flames. Turning to the pregnant witch occupying his rocking chair, Severus gave a poisonous smile. "Professor Granger-Weasley. So nice to see you… I trust all is well with your pregnancy?"
"Oh yes," Hermione stammered. "Those nutritional calming draughts you prepared should be patented. They're absolutely miraculous and the balm for my skin...Well it's divine. You really should open your own shop!"
Severus rolled his eyes at the rambling. With a heavy sigh, he interrupted, "I’m flattered. Now might I have a word alone with my...lover?"
"Oh certainly.” The tension in the air was as heavy as a spell and Hermione had no doubt that Severus would curse Harry out whether or not she chose to leave. Severus’ real question, the one behind his words, was whether she wanted a sound cursing as well. Getting up from the chair, with some difficulty, Hermione tucked the sling into the folds of her robe. Casting a sympathetic glance at Harry, she noted that his eyes were locked onto Severus’ as if the two had already begun their confrontation. “It is late and I should be getting on,” she murmured heading to the door. “Harry, do fire call me."
"Sure thing, Hermione." Harry heard himself reply. Glaring at Severus, Harry felt the searing heat of Severus’ glare on his cheeks, had lost himself in black pools so much so that only the sound of the door shutting could free him.
Severus didn’t know where to begin. The nerve of Potter giving their child’s things away, and without even consulting him, to the Granger-Weasley wench! It made no difference that her belly was nearly as round as his and that it was inevitable that their children would grow up together. What mattered were Potter’s outright assumptions, indifference even. It needed to be dealt with then and there, Severus vowed but before he could stamp his anger down enough to speak, Harry turned away from him.
"I've put away most of the toys and assembled the shelves and the furniture. I’ve fit as many of his outfits into the cupboards, chest and trunk that will fit. I'm leaving the walls, the ceiling and the decorating to you.” Rambling on, Harry hoped that Severus would see reason. “I've been quite busy.”
Looking around the nursery, Severus cooled only slightly at the sense of order and open space. “How obvious,” he stated through clenched teeth.
Why was it that no one believed that Severus Snape was a pushy, fucking bottom, Harry mused with his own anger flaring? He could still recall Ron’s reaction upon finding out who Harry’s secret lover was. Ron had accused Severus of being manipulative, a sodding pervert who just wanted to bugger Harry. Harry had gone white when Severus corrected Ron’s assumptions with, “No, Mr. Weasley, it is your precious idol that prefers to do the buggering and he’s rather demanding about it.” Yes, Harry was a top and he tried to remember that as he raised his chin to his silent lover, speaking boldly, “You have something you want to say to me, Severus?"
"Oh but I do, Potter," Severus hissed back.
***
Sitting in the midst of The Three Broomsticks pub, Harry Potter drew no admirers swooning, no over-anxious fans looking for signatures. The look on his tired face was enough to keep them at bay as he sat hunched over his firewhisky.
Looking up at his drinking mate, Harry sighed, "He likes the nursery. I had to sleep on the couch for the last two nights but he likes it. He thinks that the floor being clear of boxes is a good start."
"Well, it wasn't all bollocks then." Ron Weasley cast a worried glance over the man who had been his best friend since first year, the man whom he thought he knew. It was not a matter of Harry's sexual orientation that bothered him. After all, his brother Percy was gay. The deviance that Harry alluded to was also not the issue; Ron had dealt with that as well. Accidentally walking in on one of Fred and George's threesomes, Ron was no prude. He didn't go in for all that but well, everyone had their own tastes. Snape however… Harry's attraction to him was a bit much but what were friends for if not being understanding? Shivering, he brought his mug up for another strong pull.
"It's murder, is what it is," Harry corrected on the edge of being pissed. "He thinks I'm being too bossy, thinks I'm going to be jealous of my own son and that's why I don't want Sebastian wearing robes that cost more than most peoples weekly wage." Paraphrasing the argument, Harry scowled. Ron didn't need to know how Severus had gone on to counter with the fact that his family had a lot more money than the average wizard and that the fortune of the Snape family was doing no good rotting away in Gringotts. Harry also neglected the part about both Snape and Harry having been ridiculed for their homeliness. Good arguments, but not the point Harry was interested in. In all honesty, Harry admitted, "I want to spoil him too, just...well, I need some spoiling too."
"Oi," Ron cringed, not willing to delve into that discussion. "Thanks for all the things you sent," he said, hoping to change the subject. "They were brill!"
Harry nodded, gave a weak grin.
His ploy crushed, Ron tried to sound sympathetic. "Don't look so down, Harry. I would say that you know what Snape is like... but, well, you do."
"Yeah, sometimes I know him too well." Harry knew for example that, Severus would not be pleased by him returning home drunk. The hangover potion brewed by his lover was not in his pocket by chance. Severus would probably know anyway, but since Harry had been assigned the couch, he didn't think that he could get close enough for Severus to be able to tell. Looking down into his mug, Harry was lucid enough to ask the sensitive question. "Do you ever think that you'll be jealous of your child? I mean once Hermione gives birth, I mean...well you know things will change, but-."
"Got some news for you, Harry. Things have already changed." It was a hard truth for some men, pregnancy, particularly those of the more precocious sort, but Ron didn't add that. Harry had been worse than a late bloomer and Ron had wondered for years whether his friend would ever find someone. Then came the mysterious absences, the secretive meetings and the bite marks. Ron would ask for the name of Harry’s secret lover, but Harry would deny him at every chance, saying only that he was addicted. Ron had doubted it was that extreme. His doubt turned to disbelief when Harry revealed his lover to be none other than their ex-Potions Professor. However it had been years since Harry’s revelation and Ron was beginning to believe that perhaps Harry really was addicted, bewitched…under Imperius. Nervous about comparing his own experiences to Harry’s, Ron supposed, "You're worried that Severus won't have time for you?"
"That, yes!” Harry exclaimed. Hearing it expressed aloud and from someone other than his psyche made him feel less paranoid. “That Severus will love Sebastian so much more than me... Merlin! I feel like a right shit for even thinking it."
"Nah mate, it's natural. All blokes feel like that. Me too," he grimaced. Nothing was ever natural, or easy or even normal with Harry.
Needing all the advice he could get, Harry leaned in. "Well, how do you deal with it?"
“I try to think of it like this: the child will be both my responsibility and Hermione's. He’ll be an extension of our love not an impediment. We’ll have time together, and my mum and dad will help. Hell, they’ll help you too.” Ron doubted that Severus would allow it, but at least the offer was on the table. Holding his empty mug up for the flying pitcher to refill, Ron waited until she finished before getting serious. “Your problem is that because Severus is carrying your child, he has the bigger responsibility. To say he’s the isolated and independent sort would be putting it mildly, but if you want him you’re going to have to think a little less about yourself and more about him and the baby. The rewards will be greater, trust me. If not, you’ll have worse things to worry about than not shagging. Severus seems like the sort who would have no problems raising a child alone; Bill’s girlfriends didn’t."
Harry stiffened at the comparison. Bill Weasley had made it quite public that he wasn’t ready for children, despite having four offspring on three different continents. Harry was not that sort of man and had no inclination to be so. While Bill liked variety, Harry felt strongly for only one person and the thought of losing Severus was enough for him to quash any guilty offense he might have felt at Ron’s straightforwardness. "I want them both, Ron. I do…” Harry tried and failed to sound convincing. Staring down into his whiskey, Harry suddenly wanted a refill. “Maybe I am being a twit,” he sulked.
Pitying his friend, Ron reached over and gave Harry a pat on the shoulder. "Don’t be so hard on yourself, Harry. Let Severus spend as much as he wants on the baby, but you spend as much as you want on him. I found that massages and Honeyduke’s chocolates work well…with Hermione. I don’t know; maybe get Snape some kind of potion or something like that. But be patient.” He chuckled as Harry’s mood grew lighter, shoulders more relaxed. It showed that he was listening at least. “Maturity doesn’t come overnight and heh, we’re men. Even Severus."
"Depending on the day of the week, he's a right bitch,” said Harry with a grin. If Ron was hopeful, then Harry had to be, especially considering that Ron and Severus were hardly ever on speaking terms. No, Ron was giving him good advice, Harry was sure. He had been right to put his foot down about the nursery, but he needed to show Severus that he was serious, that he could be loving in a way that didn't include fucking over a desk, ripped clothing or bruises. Harry resigned to ply Severus with sweetness and in his drunken haze, Harry smiled broadly. "I love him Ron," Harry mused. "I think I'm going to ask him to be my bondmate."
Having just taken a hearty swig of pint of bitter, Ron spewed it half across the table. "Harry, life is never dull when you're around."
***