I Believe In Wrestling in Orlando, January 9th, 2010

Jan 10, 2010 13:27

2010 will be a year in which I stand up for what I believe in… or rather, what I BELIEVE in.

I’ll say right away that this will be a different review from me. You’ll see why as I get going. It’s not just that I decided to go to Believe (or BELIEVE or whatever you want to call it) as it was announced by that no-talent fat fuck-oh, I will be using coarse language during this review; I’ll apologize in advance if anyone gets offended-Jared David St. Laurent that he was stepping down as the booker of Believe as he was making his wrestling return, or rather in this case, “wrestling” return. I figured all along that he was still the booker of the fed but the idea of me saying that I was attending this event just because I was led to believe that a truly loathsome individual wasn’t involved with this fed any longer would mean a lot, I thought.

Boy was I wrong and I paid for making such a horrible mistake, even though I got to meet various people I hadn’t seen for a number of weeks. I was hoping that things would be better without a cancerous tumor around, and yes I’m using that particular phrase on purpose. I’ll explain later if you don’t know and yes, something as blunt as that has to be used considering the circumstances.

I entered the building in the outskirts of the ghetto of Orlando and the toadies tried to be nice to me but I just ignored them, as most people do. When I got there (20 minutes before the announced 8 PM bell time) there were hardly any cars in the parking lot, which I found to be interesting. Some people later showed up, but there was no more than 100 there, which I understand to be less than what they had most of last year. I don’t know if it was the weather, the Magic game going on literally next door (they crushed the Atlanta Hawks by 32 points, which is shocking as they almost have the same win-loss totals this season), the layoff from the last show being in October, or what. By the way, after the show I always planned on going home rather than going to any restaurants afterward or-ahem-attending any nightclubs in downtown Orlando. The weather is too cold, it likely would be barren in that club-I feel bad as I all but know personally that this weather has delivered a low blow to the cashflow of that place and all clubs in Orlando, but I’ll wait until next month most likely to return there-and I’ll save some ducats by not being there. In hindsight, I might as well have gone there.

Things were normal before this event and I chatted with various people. I noticed that Jared David was there but I wasn’t surprised by that, or even the fact that he ended up backstage. The event started with Jonathan Gold talking on the mic until we heard the New World Order theme. Yes, SCOTT HALL was there. That was a legit surprise. He stated how long he has lived in Florida (many years) and he mentioned Hogan and what happened at that terrible Monday Night Impact show (don’t get me started on what a disaster that was) and then stated that the Hulkster told him to take over all of the Orlando feds, so now he’ll be the matchmaker in Believe. Yes, that’s what he said. He watched the event from a table near the concession area.

1. Gus Money defeated Scott Davis. This was a pretty good opener. It went like how I figured it would. Gus moved around fast (and Scott had to stall more than once in order to stop the momentum) and also used technical wrestling. Davis took over and used some chicanery along the way. Gus made the comeback and he got some near-falls. Finally, out of nowhere Gus got the victory. I wish I’d remember more about the matches in particular but one thing here stuck out in my mind and at the very end I’ll get to it and uncork a volcano’s worth of fury, metaphorically. I can at least say that while Scott was wearing down Gus, there were obvious moments where the audience was supposed to cheer on Money. They didn’t. Yet, during his comeback they were suddenly into him. I don’t know how to explain it, but I didn’t think it was anything that Scott did wrong, or anything like that. It was just an odd crowd, I thought.

2. Q.T. Marshall defeated Reggie Brown. I last saw Reggie Brown wrestle in that Vintage Florida Rumble bout. Then again that’s the only time before here that I remember seeing him wrestle. It went briefly back and forth to start off, but then Q.T. took over and he dominated this short match the rest of the way.

Ray Beez was supposed to wrestle Leon Scott, but recently Leon announced on the Afro Squad board that he wasn’t going to be wrestling any longer, at least for the immediate future, and left it at that. I have no idea what it’s all about but if it’s personal troubles hopefully they’ll be taken care of, no matter if he returns to the wrestling ring or not. Ray came out and he was told that Leon “had retired”. He acted shocked, but then again he is a bum and who knows, maybe that board is blocked at the local library he visits in order to surf the web… he wants anyone to come out and wrestle him. Suddenly, he was attacked from behind by… Mr. Milo Beasley? Yes.

3. Ray Beez defeated Mr. Milo Beasley (w/ Mr. Milo Bearsley) in a Falls Count Anywhere bout. It wasn’t announced until the middle of the bout that it was Falls Count Anywhere contest, the same stip as in the Beez vs. Scott contest that was proposed here. It was pretty good for what it was, which was a short but fun bout. They went into the crowd and people had to be told repeatedly to move out of the wrestler’s way. Sigh… some risky ouchy sort of stuff happened. Then, they made it to the ring and the airplane spin was done by Milo, stuff was teased, and Ray won the contest. Afterwards, we saw that these two men’s reaction to having fought each other even though they’ve been a team for months now AND Ray had Milo’s bear in his hands, threatening to kick it into the audience… they shook hands. Figures. Genius booker, Jared David is not. I mean, the last that I knew, both Ray and Milo were hated heels in this fed, but I guess that changed; the reason why it changed… no good one at all, as far as I know. Maybe I have an answer as to why attendance is down… insult your audience’s intelligence, and it may very well happen.

4. 2 Fast 2 Furious (Nooie Lee-Jerrelle Clark) defeated The James Boys (Rich and Luke James). This was a pretty good bout. For a lot of it, Rich and Luke had control. They first used technical wrestling then they decided to be cheater cheater pumpkin eaters and did stuff like switching without tags while the ref (Frankie Gastineau) was distracted with an angry Jerrelle. Nooie was beat on for quite a bit… oh wait, I have to mention that early on, The James Boys were on the outside but before the count started, Frankie demanded that 2 Fast 2 Furious go into a neutral corner. Really. Given that tag ropes were used I guess that Believe is now a stickler for the rules, ironic given the genius booker and how the ending was Nooie getting the pin and yet I don’t think he was technically the legal guy. Even though I shouldn’t get mad about that and I shouldn’t blame Jared David, I will do that anyhow. During the match the crowd was eh, but when they won, the crowd went batty for Nooie and Jerrelle, so it was done right, I’ll say. Oh, and during the match a little girl called The James Boys “cheater cheater pumpkin eaters”. Really. I wonder where she would have heard that from…

By the way, a little less than a week ago I was out and about and saw a middle-aged Hispanic gentleman wearing an orange and black 2 Fast 2 Furious jacket. Yes, he purchased a jacket based on that crappy 2003 movie (I can’t believe how bad it was given that with the first in the franchise I was entertained by it). It was pretty dope! But, I bet it kept him warm so I can’t really poke fun at him too much. It’s not like he looked like someone at People of Wal-Mart.

5. Nick Fame defeated TJ Perkins. This was a pretty good contest. Nick stated on the mic beforehand about how people claim he only gets wins in this fed via being a cheating pumpkin eater, to paraphrase. Guess what happened at the finish… TJ dominated early on with his fast-paced technical offense. Nick stalled and was called a chicken by the crowd. He was able to take over when Perkins accidentally posted his shoulder on the ringpost. That was targeted for a few minutes before TJ made the comeback. He got his submission hold on more than once but Fame was always able to reach the ropes. He was able to get the win with some sort of rollup while holding onto the ropes. Hard to believe in this fed (pun intended), something happening from show to show and it being followed upon here. Usually it’s random stuff happening randomly.

Intermission time. Nothing else to say here, except that before the show and during the break, they actually played songs that weren’t God-awful. All the other times I was there it was all horrible alternative music tunes that all sounded alike and just about put me to sleep. About time Jared David got the idea to play stuff that people would actually like. Maybe next he’ll actually get it through his thick skull that it’s a good idea to FILM THE SHOWS FOR DVD! I don’t want to hear any poppycock about how they can’t make money from the DVD’s or whatever; stop being a stupid fuck, Jared David. Many people have demanded it but because you’re a stupid fuck I’m sure that none will ever be filmed for release. As always, Jared David does the opposite of what will draw money in the wrestling business. Hey, he’s the one who says he’s just a booker and doesn’t care about the overall fate of Believe. Oh wait, I started off on a rant there. I wanted to save it for…

This point of the show. Maxwell Chicago came out and he had the lounge singer gimmick going and his ring entrance was Paul Anka’s lounge version of Smells Like Teen Spirit. I marked out, and I enjoyed how Maxwell sang and the lyrics were about how the crowd was awful. His trunks were Illinois themed, having amongst other things the logo to the University of Illinois on them, Abe Lincoln, and Things were going great, then… a black hole of suck came out. It was Jared David! He wore regular clothes. He got in the ring and stated that he was making his wrestling return. Yes, a week *before* he was supposed to make his big return for the “wrestler vs. promoter” match he has vs. Frankie Capone! Yes, that’s what I’ve seen the match billed as and what an insult to the Vintage promotion. But, it will get worse. Like, MSL taking off his outfit to show that he has on wrestling trunks. The crowd was horrified-in general-by how he looked in trunks but of course the toadies were marking out and practically drooling at the thought of seeing their talentless idol wrestling again.

Jared David defeated Maxwell Chicago. Jared David make sure in this very short match (hey, if Mrs. Saint Laurent wrestles for more than 5 minutes in a singles bout, his heart is likely to explode) to make Maxwell look like complete shit, no-selling his offense and only allowing him to have any sort of advantage after he missed a move, one of only a few he has in his clown-show repertoire. It was mere seconds before the missus took over and none of his moves looked convincing at all; they wouldn’t have hurt any of the young kids in the crowd, and there were quite a few of them there. Him having his usual goofy smile on his face, as if he thinks it’s all a joke (and he almost always does that whenever doing anything involving professional wrestling) He won with the awful-looking MSL Driver. Afterwards, he practically took a shit on the Vintage promotion by telling someone representing the promotion who was there that he wrestled a week early and totally ruined their idea of having his return be there (not that Jared David returning means much or even anything positive to the box office anyhow, but still…) by stating that he wanted to give Orlando the chance to see his return. That’s not exactly verbatim but the point is, he all but said that no one would be there in Sanford to see his return so he might as well do it in his vanity fed; he also should have said that he did it as a big “FUCK YOU” to Blair Russell as I have a feeling he wasn’t going to wrestle at this event until he saw that I was there, and an Illinois guy happened to be there so Jared David decided to do this to give a middle finger to me by squashing a much more talented guy just because he happens to bill himself as being from the state I lived in for the first 23 years of my life. What a sad mentally ill individual.

Now, I was hoping that Jared David would maybe change his ways. As with anything coming from him, it’s likely to be a lie, but apparently he has a *brain tumor* and it’s not cancerous but it still has to be treated. Maybe he would take this as a sign from God or whatever higher power that he should change his ways and not be such a blight on humanity. Why did I ever think that? Ever since I first heard the news, I always thought, “Couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy.” I know, offensive to some but given what’s happened in the past with that awful excuse for a human being, I feel fully justified in thinking that way. It’s a shame that he can’t take a hint, as who knows, maybe one day instant karma will ultimately get him. I do feel a little bad for Vintage that this happened, although they should have really known better. I now sure as shit won’t be at their next event this upcoming Saturday, even though I have no confidence that Jared David will have a backbone and fulfill that booking. It’d be nice to see Frankie Capone seriously maim and cripple him (as that’d lead to all the toadies crying their eyes out that their fallen idol got exposed as the bitch he is) but I’ll do what I should’ve done here and boycotted the event due to his involvement. If it wasn’t for FIP inexplicably using him then I’d never have to see him in person… maybe one day they’ll realize that this CHILD (and he truly acted like a 4 year old at this show) isn’t worth the trouble and he wouldn’t ruin FIP shows with his mere presence. But hey, like I said maybe instant karma will finally get him in a big way…

I was going to leave right then and there (I thought this too as soon as I realized Jared David was going to wrestle) but then The Heartbreakers came out (w/ some manager I haven’t seen before whose name I didn’t catch) and as they were supposed to fight against The Heartbreak Express, and I always enjoy Sean and Phil Davis in action. Well, after the manager insulted the toadies for being World of Warcraft geeks who need girlfriends (normally that’d make me laugh but besides them not being that type of geek, I was seething with rage), it was stated that Sean and Phil Davis weren’t there. Sean is said to have pneumonia, but that was only stated online and up to this point at the show, it was not announced that they wouldn’t be there. Their replacements were… Carlos Rivera (related to Will?) and Rico Suave! No offense to the young wrestler from South Florida or the guy who has wrestled in Puerto Rico for years, but I had had enough. I walked out the door, never to return. So, I missed The Heartbreakers beating Carlos Rivera and Rico Suave, then Snow beating Chasyn Rance after Zoe made her return. So, at their next show it is Team Vision defending their AWA Tag Titles (yes, those titles have been vacant for more than a year now; then again, the AWA fed is now known as Wrestling Superstars Live due to them being sued and lost for having that trademark name and I don’t even know if they’re still around or not) against Snow and Zoe. Um, so now Jared David is a bad guy? He acted like he was a face against Maxwell Chicago! What a genius booker you are, Mrs. St. Laurent.

So, I thoroughly apologize for ever going to those meaningless Believe shows, for trying to be pals (very briefly) with Jared David in late 2007 and for going against everything I believe in by attending this event, as I knew in my heart of hearts that Jared David is still the booker here and he more than proved that to me without saying a word. I don’t fault anyone who attends these shows or who wrestles on the shows. I don’t take it personally and I understand it’s a payday and all that. I just would prefer never to give money to him ever again. I could hae asked for my money back here, but no one was around at the time and plus, the money would be blood-stained so they might as well keep the 10 bucks. From what I saw of the show, it was fine enough, but like with all Believe shows, it’s random stuff happening randomly.

As for the next show I’ll be attending, I have no idea. Next weekend, though, I’ll post Part 2 of the best matches I saw in the second half of last year. I’ll be in a better mood then than I am right now.
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