wellesley visit

[blandmannered]

Alright, so I had an interesting dinner with a few spoiled Wellesley girls that severely influenced my opinion of Wellesley for a bit. Very snobby and more over petty.  Middle classdom was auspicious at that point.  We ate oysters (what would a rabbi say?) and conversed about a.) is Tiffany's boyfriend cute, b.) how it sucks to not be on financial aid, and c.) how Tiffany's friend is so PATHETIC.  *Throws self of a bridge,* speaking of which: I'm this much closer to meeting Quentin from Sound and The Fury; the three things that impeded me were: a.) I was in Florida, b.) Quentin killed himself by jumping into the Charles, and C.) Quentin was an imaginary character.  Har har.  OH Onward -> later that night, I met normal people, went to a frat party, and drank hardish alcohol for the first time.  I didn't get drunk though- I had some spiked peach tea, and a few shots of something grape and coffeeish.  The party was "sketch" (the term they use...)- i met some boy named Isaac that asked me what my name was THREE TIMES.  Until I finally started talking about his name (Isaac) and the religious significance.  Inappropriate.  i met a normal, adorable Asian named something like "Friend" but he left :[.  i wish he would have played scrabble or something with me.  I ended up going on the roof and seeing pot.  I didn't smoke it a.) because of my new anti-embarrassment crusade (Id make an ass of myself) and b.) I encourage Kindo not to smoke,  It was fucking cold :/

Went to MIT and i've been staying with Camille.  My emotional state has been relatively unstable.  I started my period last night, and ended up writhing in pain for a bit.  I ended up SITTING on the MIT shower floor.  :/.  went to the MFA and decided how bored I was by visual art.  I've been feeling really awkward for the past day or two.  I'm not sure what bounds to cross with Camille.  But she's assertive enough.  The people in her dorm make me feel really awkward (except her roommate Jingyun.)  I just felt so inferior and off balance. I ended up making cookies for Camille and her dorm-mates, but I was too shy to offer them to anyone.  So when people ask i feverishly encourage them to eat them.  I made an ass out of myself a few times; mentioning the wrong body preserved in Russia- querying about socialized medicine in China (my asians are uniformed, I assume.) This guy Brian really made me feel like a housewife :/ Which brought up the questions I had concerning bragging and whatnot. Why should one brag and why should one NOT brag? Should one not say something merely to avoid hurt feelings over truths? Does a dismissive attitude's sense of realism overshadow the benefits one can gain from not having a dismissive and condescending attitude? And of course this brings issues of merit and I end up in a determinism battle :/