My app(you trick as marks)
name: Jack Daniels
age: A tale as old as time itself, when men once roamed these prairies...
location: What are you, a cop?
favorite bands: 311, Deftones, The Joannasford Stick and Jug band, and Michael Bolton
hated bands: Yours(if you're in one), your friend's(if he/she is in one), and mine(if I'm in one)
top 5 albums: Jesus, you people want so much from me. Ok, top 5: 5)Supertramp Breakfast in America, 4) 311 Grassroots, 3) Deftones Adrenaline, 2) Deftones White Pony 1) Joannasford Stick and Jug band From muddy banks to unclean shores; the autobiography of the possum
Make a soundtrack to your life (less than 30 songs please) I don't have that kind of time on my hands and I'm also typing very slow because i got my hand stuck in a bag of werther's originals.
bio(anything interesting you feel we should know) well, after destroying the death star for the second time, me and the other rebels from the alliance went to Sonic and had ourselves a couple of chillidogs. after meeting some professor, and him babbling incoherently about some kind of flux KO-PAS-IT-OR, he calls me marty and i get into his vehicle. 3 hours later, im found in a ditch at the mile 29 marker off of the NJ turnpike. Some souvenirs were bruises, missing teeth, and a loss of innocense.
instruments: geetar, and a diabolical intelligence
favorite movies: anything with LL Cool J in it
types of music you listen to: well, if you call the sound of women crying in a dark, damp basement while chained with shackles to an old cobblestone wall while i push thumbtacks into my penis music, then you get a general idea
Do you like metallica? Validate. the only metallica i know released 5 albums(kill em all, ride the lightning, master of puppets, and justic for all, and the black album.
personal influences: snoop dogg, the postman, koko B ware, the junkyard dog, Cledis Joannasford, and the mack of them all...the archbishop don 'magic' juan
Random Thought Provokers: When I see a child alone somewhere...
What makes you laugh?: You, silly silly beaver
If you had an endless supply of money, describe your lifestyle: well, id probably lead a very quiet life...sure, there would be rocket cars and old e farther than the eye could see, but i would probably take up a nice, quaint hobby like painting, stamp collecting, or purchasing people's souls(or parts of,at least)
Who is your hero?: Probably the nightstalker sam Ramirez...look him up, you can thank me later
Whats your best characteristic?: How I move silently in the shadows has served me well in the past...that and my acute ability
Whats your weak point?: There isn't a weak part on me
Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours?: Depends...how many kids do you have and what age are they?
How many pairs of underwear do you own?: I don't like to wear underwear...or pants for that matter. I usually just put two holes in a garbage bag or staple some paper there
Seriously... Where does the other sock end up?: In an alternate dimension where red means go and green means stop, and there are no jews
Who do you blame for your mood today?: you for making me fill out this damn app
Have you ever seen a dead body?: I hope to see yours sometime soon, so unless you mean the ones in my dreams, then I guess my answer is no
Is a blowjob cheating?: cheating how? if you do it for good grades, sure, but for any other reason i see it more as a common courtesy
Do you drink/smoke/do drugs?: i wanna drink you, smoke the ash from your burnt cadaver, and turn...yes
What should we do with stupid people?: We already have done something with them...it's called the south
What happens after you die?: well, most likely you are first transported to some facility where undertakers either gangbang you immediately or soak you in water then create holes in your body in order to penetrate and therefore come closer to God
How big is your bed? Big enough?: Sure it's big, I can stack(so far) 45 dead children(ages 5-9)...I'll let you know when I get a chance to try more.
How long do you think you will live?: well my physical body should be good for a total of 50 years, but my evil will live on in the ones I've 'abused' and let live/
Do you respect your parents?: No, I never met them. I raised by various forms of crustaceon off the coast of Sicily...I hate I-talians
Ok, since you said make up I'll tell you a real one. A couple of years ago I just got out of high school and decided to take a roda trip across the US to celebrate my new found freedom. Well all went smooth until I came to the border of Arkansas where I met Prince at a truck stop. We played some hopscotch, had dirty sex inthe bathroom(by dirty sex, i mean duct tape, crisco, fecal matter, and Ben Affleck were involved). Suffice to say, I never did get rid of those crabs. I now live in Vermont where I am married to Billy Dee Williams.