Royal Bluebell [SiChul]
Title: Royal Bluebell
Pairing: SiChul
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own them.
Summary: HeeChul and SiWon arrive at the younger's favorite place.
AN: Sequel to The End Of The Circle. This is for phuheechul because it's her birthday today. So happy birthday. Hopefully, you'll have a great day :)
For the flower: It's actually a royal bluebell, but remember, this is pure fiction, so this flower exists in real life, but not there where it is written in this fic. And for this fic, it's rare to see it, okay? Also, I don't know the true meaning of this flower, so I just made up my own. Pics are in the fic.
--
HeeChul was still crying. SiWon just let him, because, in fact, tears were silently sliding down his cheeks as well.
"Why can't I just remember, SiWon?" HeeChul sniffed quietly.
"Shh, it's okay. Let's just start anew," SiWon whispered. His right hand was holding HeeChul's and with his free hand, he wiped the tears away.
He didn't want him to cry anymore.
They walked in silence afterwards. The sun was rising.
HeeChul looked at SiWon with surprise. He had stopped crying as well.
"We have been in the train the whole night," he realized and SiWon nodded. "Are you tired?" he asked in concern.
HeeChul shook his head. "No."
"We're almost there," SiWon told him with an encouraging smile.
HeeChul returned that smile. He felt this insecurity inside, but he couldn't care less right now. SiWon had told him, they would begin anew, so why feeling ashamed, or afraid, or hesitant, or just unsure?
"SiWon?" HeeChul suddenly asked. His voice was barely above a whisper and SiWon turned to face him, giving him his whole attention. "Yes?"
"I'm just a bother for you. Just admit it. So what if I don't want to start anew?" HeeChul didn't look at SiWon, instead his gaze was lowered to the ground.
SiWon gulped. "Please, don't. We can do it. We were together as friends before and everything broke apart. But we still managed to be lovers afterwards," he told HeeChul who just sighed and added, "And everything broke apart once again."
SiWon felt his heart aching, but he quickly shook his head. "No, HeeChul, no. We loved each other!" he stated desperately.
"I do believe we had something great, but it's in the past. SiWon, I can't remember!" HeeChul exclaimed, just as desperate.
"Please stay with me for a little more," SiWon pleaded and HeeChul nodded.
"Give me a chance. It's just the same with a new lover. Let's just fall in love, once again," SiWon said, as if it was the most obvious and easiest thing, and there was no doubt at all. SiWon wanted to make it even clearer with a kiss. He came closer to HeeChul's face, but HeeChul still seemed to be too uncomfortable, so SiWon backed away with a sad sigh. "Sorry," he murmured.
Tears were in his eyes.
"SiWon, can you tell me why I forgot?" HeeChul asked to have something to talk about instead of walking in an awkward silence.
SiWon nodded. "You can't remember that, either?"
"No," HeeChul admitted. He looked sad and SiWon felt sorry for him.
"I only know you have been in a car accident," SiWon explained. HeeChul seemed to be satisfied with that answer. At least, it was enough to know for him.
But SiWon didn't tell him that it was a miracle that he was still here right now, walking with him. HeeChul should had been dead, and if not so, he should had been unable to move, but HeeChul was lucky. After ten months, he was fine once again. He was able to move. He was able to talk. He was able to live again.
Only his memory was still lost.
The doctor had said SiWon shouldn't hope for another miracle. SiWon didn't listen to that doctor at first. He had tried everything, but eventually, even he had to admit to himself that the doctor had been right and it was hopeless.
Taking him to his favorite place right now was just to make himself happy. It wasn't for HeeChul to remember.
"We're there," SiWon suddenly announced when they left the forest and came to a big field. Many flowers in different colors were blooming on it. The sun was already shining down on that little place on earth.
HeeChul was surprised. He stared at the beautiful sight in front of him in awe.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" SiWon asked with a small smile. This place did its job very well, letting him forget about all the bad things. There were just HeeChul and him in this comfortable silence.
"Do you like it?" SiWon asked expectantly.
HeeChul nodded, his eyes wandering around.
"My legs are tired," he suddenly stated and sank to the ground.
SiWon watched him with a smile while HeeChul, surrounded by flowers, was smiling happily as well. "It smells so good."
SiWon nodded. "I know," he replied and sank on his knees next to HeeChul.
"This has been our favorite place," SiWon admitted quietly.
HeeChul, who didn't react at first, slowly turned to look at SiWon. He didn't say anything, when he realized that tears were falling down SiWon's cheeks. It wasn't enough to forget when HeeChul was still next to him, oblivious to everything that had been before.
HeeChul's heart ached. He knew he was hurting SiWon. He didn't want to, but he just did, because he forgot.
"I still can't remember," HeeChul murmured sadly.
"It's okay," SiWon sniffed.
HeeChul stared at him. He wanted to change it. He didn't want to be the cause for SiWon's sadness. He wanted the other man to be happy.
HeeChul slowly reached out for SiWon's face. He still felt insecure, but finally, he pressed his lips onto SiWon's. It was a simple kiss, but it was longer than that one in the train.
SiWon was at least just as surprised, but closed his eyes.
After a minute, HeeChul pulled away, slowly opening his eyes at the same time as SiWon did. Their eyes met and SiWon hated his heart which was burning painfully while skipping a beat in fake hope.
"Thanks for showing me this, SiWon. It can become our favorite place once again, right?" HeeChul asked softly, carefully wiping SiWon's tears away.
SiWon only nodded.
The sun made all the colors of those flowers sparkle.
SiWon stood up with a smile. "Your legs are still tired, right?" he asked and HeeChul nodded. "Yes."
"I just want to check something, okay? You can stay here, I'm not far away," SiWon announced and HeeChul nodded again.
SiWon smiled a warm smile before he turned and left, walking over the big field in no particular direction.
HeeChul watched him. It was killing himself, seeing SiWon breaking down inside, so he let him go.
SiWon wandered around. The field was big and some trees stood in the middle, making it impossible for HeeChul to watch SiWon, when he disappeared behind them.
He kneeled down as soon as HeeChul couldn't see him anymore.
But he didn't cry. He just picked up a flower. And another, with a different color.
SiWon continued to pick the most beautiful flowers up, just like a little kid.
>It's boring. Let's explore this forest," HeeChul had suggested. Their parents had taken a rest on a parking place.
I was eight and too young to think about consequences, so I agreed.
The two of us secretly ran away. We wandered through the forest for a long time, chasing each other, or shouting around, until HeeChul suddenly stopped. 'Look!' he said and stared at the sight in front of him in awe.
I stopped next to him and my expression was similar to his when I saw the beautiful place in front of me. There was a big field with flowers in all kind of colors.
"It's so beautiful," I stated and HeeChul immediately agreed. "These flowers are so pretty," he said and quickly ran further into the field where he was surrounded by them.
HeeChul and I picked the most beautiful ones up. We wanted to give them to our parents, so they won't be mad at us for running away.
On our way back, I told HeeChul that I wanted to come back to that place someday.
'When I grow up, I'll take you there again, SiWonnie," HeeChul said to me.<
SiWon laughed silently. Their visit this time was so similar to back then.
SiWon remembered HeeChul having exactly the same expression when he first saw this place.
Half an hour passed with SiWon picking up more and more flowers. He was lost in his own happy memories and he didn't want to come back to reality just yet.
But he couldn't let HeeChul be alone for so long, so he decided to finally return.
But when SiWon came back to the place, where he had left HeeChul, the other one wasn't there anymore.
SiWon looked around in confusion and worry. "HeeChul?!" he called but received no answer.
"HeeChul?" he shouted, louder this time.
"Why won't you call me HeeChullie anymore?" HeeChul asked with a pout on his lips.
SiWon jumped around, staring at HeeChul. "Oh my, don't ever scare me like that again."
"Only when you call me HeeChullie," HeeChul announced, still keeping his expression.
SiWon chuckled. "Alright,...HeeChullie." It hurt, calling HeeChul like that. SiWon had realized it before in the train.
"Here, this is for you," SiWon then announced and gave his flowers to HeeChul.
"Thank you," HeeChul said. "I have something for you, too," he added with a smug smile.
SiWon raised his eyebrows. "What?"
Without saying anything, HeeChul gave SiWon a little dark blue flower.
SiWon gasped in shock. This flower held so many memories of them, so how was it possible that HeeChul was giving him exactly this flower when there were still hundreds of other ones?
"It's so beautiful, isn't it?" HeeChul asked with a smile. His eyes were sparkling.
SiWon nodded, still in shock, and slowly reached for the little flower to take it. "Yes,...beautiful...," he murmured, more to himself.
"Sit down with me, SiWon," HeeChul told him and SiWon sank down to the soft ground. "How have you found it? It's rare." He watched HeeChul smile. This place didn't only help him, but also HeeChul to be happier, as it seemed.
"I know," HeeChul replied.
SiWon sighed. Seeing this flower once again, made him sad, but he hid it well. He didn't want to upset HeeChul. SiWon reached for HeeChul's hand and intertwined their fingers, while taking a closer look to the beautiful plant in his other hand.
"So beautiful...," he murmured again.
HeeChul leaned closer to SiWon, so he could lay his head onto the other's shoulder. He felt more and more comfortable around SiWon.
"SiWonnie...this flower...it's special, right?" HeeChul asked innocently.
"Yeah, for me, it is," SiWon replied, keeping his gaze on the flower and its unique color, when the sun was shining on it.
"SiWonnie," HeeChul said again.
>I asked you if you trusted me.
You said, 'Yes.'
So I made you close your eyes and let you promise not to look.
You kept your promise and I led you by your hand through the forest and to the field.
'Open your eyes,' I whispered into your ear and you did. Your eyes were shining with happiness at the sight of this beautiful place. 'I know this,' you told me and I smiled happily, saying,'I know. Do you remember when we ran away to play in the forest, when we were young? We found this place.'
Your eyes widened in sudden realization. You remembered.
'I promised to take you to this place once again someday. I keep my promise,' I said with a satisfied smile. You seemed to be so happy in that moment, because after I finished talking, you turned to me and kissed me until we were lying on the soft ground, between all the flowers.
We were laughing loudly, just lying there, looking at the sky or the flowers, or each other.
Only after some more minutes, you got up and helped me stand as well.
We strolled through the field, hand in hand. I remember this warmth and love of you, when all of a sudden, you noticed something and stopped.
I didn't know what was going on, but I stopped walking to stare at you.
You let go of my hand to kneel down. 'HeeChullie, look,' you said to me and I kneeled down next to you.
In front of us was a little blue flower, more beautiful than any other one around. It was shining and shimmering in the sun.
'Wow, it's so pretty,' I whispered and you agreed with me.
We stayed there, just lying next to that flower, and declared it as our special flower.
'It stands for hope, miracles and love that will never stop growing, even though there might be some obstacles. It stands for a difficult, but happy life,' you told me.
'I hope it will guard us and bring us happiness,' I said to you and you kissed me deeply. 'It will. I'm sure of it.'<
SiWon pushed HeeChul's head away to stare at him in shock. He was speechless.
"I remember. I can remember, SiWonnie," HeeChul whispered so quietly, that SiWon was barely able to hear it.
But he did and his eyes started to water. "You remember?" he repeated in disbelief and HeeChul nodded with a happy smile, even though tears formed in his eyes as well.
"You remember...HeeChullie!" SiWon immediately embraced HeeChul tightly, before kissing him deeply and passionately. "HeeChullie," he said once again and tears of happiness fell down his cheeks.
"I do. Everything," HeeChul told SiWon and reached for the other's hand in which the little blue flower still was.
"This is our special flower. I found it and it helped me to remember. SiWonnie, you were right. It stands for a difficult, but happy life. It stands for our life," HeeChul stated and kissed him happily.
"I love you, SiWonnie," HeeChul said. His smile was brighter than ever.
"I love you, too, HeeChullie." SiWon sniffed a little and tried to wipe his tears away. "I'm so happy," he whispered in relief.
"Me, too," HeeChul said and pressed his cheek to SiWon's.
"The doctor said, you probably would never remember. He said it was a miracle you even survived and are healthy. So this...it's another miracle," SiWon finally told HeeChul the truth.
The other one was shocked at first, but then started to smile once again.
"Now, we can stay together."
And they kissed.
Pairing: SiChul
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own them.
Summary: HeeChul and SiWon arrive at the younger's favorite place.
AN: Sequel to The End Of The Circle. This is for phuheechul because it's her birthday today. So happy birthday. Hopefully, you'll have a great day :)
For the flower: It's actually a royal bluebell, but remember, this is pure fiction, so this flower exists in real life, but not there where it is written in this fic. And for this fic, it's rare to see it, okay? Also, I don't know the true meaning of this flower, so I just made up my own. Pics are in the fic.
--
HeeChul was still crying. SiWon just let him, because, in fact, tears were silently sliding down his cheeks as well.
"Why can't I just remember, SiWon?" HeeChul sniffed quietly.
"Shh, it's okay. Let's just start anew," SiWon whispered. His right hand was holding HeeChul's and with his free hand, he wiped the tears away.
He didn't want him to cry anymore.
They walked in silence afterwards. The sun was rising.
HeeChul looked at SiWon with surprise. He had stopped crying as well.
"We have been in the train the whole night," he realized and SiWon nodded. "Are you tired?" he asked in concern.
HeeChul shook his head. "No."
"We're almost there," SiWon told him with an encouraging smile.
HeeChul returned that smile. He felt this insecurity inside, but he couldn't care less right now. SiWon had told him, they would begin anew, so why feeling ashamed, or afraid, or hesitant, or just unsure?
"SiWon?" HeeChul suddenly asked. His voice was barely above a whisper and SiWon turned to face him, giving him his whole attention. "Yes?"
"I'm just a bother for you. Just admit it. So what if I don't want to start anew?" HeeChul didn't look at SiWon, instead his gaze was lowered to the ground.
SiWon gulped. "Please, don't. We can do it. We were together as friends before and everything broke apart. But we still managed to be lovers afterwards," he told HeeChul who just sighed and added, "And everything broke apart once again."
SiWon felt his heart aching, but he quickly shook his head. "No, HeeChul, no. We loved each other!" he stated desperately.
"I do believe we had something great, but it's in the past. SiWon, I can't remember!" HeeChul exclaimed, just as desperate.
"Please stay with me for a little more," SiWon pleaded and HeeChul nodded.
"Give me a chance. It's just the same with a new lover. Let's just fall in love, once again," SiWon said, as if it was the most obvious and easiest thing, and there was no doubt at all. SiWon wanted to make it even clearer with a kiss. He came closer to HeeChul's face, but HeeChul still seemed to be too uncomfortable, so SiWon backed away with a sad sigh. "Sorry," he murmured.
Tears were in his eyes.
"SiWon, can you tell me why I forgot?" HeeChul asked to have something to talk about instead of walking in an awkward silence.
SiWon nodded. "You can't remember that, either?"
"No," HeeChul admitted. He looked sad and SiWon felt sorry for him.
"I only know you have been in a car accident," SiWon explained. HeeChul seemed to be satisfied with that answer. At least, it was enough to know for him.
But SiWon didn't tell him that it was a miracle that he was still here right now, walking with him. HeeChul should had been dead, and if not so, he should had been unable to move, but HeeChul was lucky. After ten months, he was fine once again. He was able to move. He was able to talk. He was able to live again.
Only his memory was still lost.
The doctor had said SiWon shouldn't hope for another miracle. SiWon didn't listen to that doctor at first. He had tried everything, but eventually, even he had to admit to himself that the doctor had been right and it was hopeless.
Taking him to his favorite place right now was just to make himself happy. It wasn't for HeeChul to remember.
"We're there," SiWon suddenly announced when they left the forest and came to a big field. Many flowers in different colors were blooming on it. The sun was already shining down on that little place on earth.
HeeChul was surprised. He stared at the beautiful sight in front of him in awe.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" SiWon asked with a small smile. This place did its job very well, letting him forget about all the bad things. There were just HeeChul and him in this comfortable silence.
"Do you like it?" SiWon asked expectantly.
HeeChul nodded, his eyes wandering around.
"My legs are tired," he suddenly stated and sank to the ground.
SiWon watched him with a smile while HeeChul, surrounded by flowers, was smiling happily as well. "It smells so good."
SiWon nodded. "I know," he replied and sank on his knees next to HeeChul.
"This has been our favorite place," SiWon admitted quietly.
HeeChul, who didn't react at first, slowly turned to look at SiWon. He didn't say anything, when he realized that tears were falling down SiWon's cheeks. It wasn't enough to forget when HeeChul was still next to him, oblivious to everything that had been before.
HeeChul's heart ached. He knew he was hurting SiWon. He didn't want to, but he just did, because he forgot.
"I still can't remember," HeeChul murmured sadly.
"It's okay," SiWon sniffed.
HeeChul stared at him. He wanted to change it. He didn't want to be the cause for SiWon's sadness. He wanted the other man to be happy.
HeeChul slowly reached out for SiWon's face. He still felt insecure, but finally, he pressed his lips onto SiWon's. It was a simple kiss, but it was longer than that one in the train.
SiWon was at least just as surprised, but closed his eyes.
After a minute, HeeChul pulled away, slowly opening his eyes at the same time as SiWon did. Their eyes met and SiWon hated his heart which was burning painfully while skipping a beat in fake hope.
"Thanks for showing me this, SiWon. It can become our favorite place once again, right?" HeeChul asked softly, carefully wiping SiWon's tears away.
SiWon only nodded.
The sun made all the colors of those flowers sparkle.
SiWon stood up with a smile. "Your legs are still tired, right?" he asked and HeeChul nodded. "Yes."
"I just want to check something, okay? You can stay here, I'm not far away," SiWon announced and HeeChul nodded again.
SiWon smiled a warm smile before he turned and left, walking over the big field in no particular direction.
HeeChul watched him. It was killing himself, seeing SiWon breaking down inside, so he let him go.
SiWon wandered around. The field was big and some trees stood in the middle, making it impossible for HeeChul to watch SiWon, when he disappeared behind them.
He kneeled down as soon as HeeChul couldn't see him anymore.
But he didn't cry. He just picked up a flower. And another, with a different color.
SiWon continued to pick the most beautiful flowers up, just like a little kid.
>It's boring. Let's explore this forest," HeeChul had suggested. Their parents had taken a rest on a parking place.
I was eight and too young to think about consequences, so I agreed.
The two of us secretly ran away. We wandered through the forest for a long time, chasing each other, or shouting around, until HeeChul suddenly stopped. 'Look!' he said and stared at the sight in front of him in awe.
I stopped next to him and my expression was similar to his when I saw the beautiful place in front of me. There was a big field with flowers in all kind of colors.
"It's so beautiful," I stated and HeeChul immediately agreed. "These flowers are so pretty," he said and quickly ran further into the field where he was surrounded by them.
HeeChul and I picked the most beautiful ones up. We wanted to give them to our parents, so they won't be mad at us for running away.
On our way back, I told HeeChul that I wanted to come back to that place someday.
'When I grow up, I'll take you there again, SiWonnie," HeeChul said to me.<
SiWon laughed silently. Their visit this time was so similar to back then.
SiWon remembered HeeChul having exactly the same expression when he first saw this place.
Half an hour passed with SiWon picking up more and more flowers. He was lost in his own happy memories and he didn't want to come back to reality just yet.
But he couldn't let HeeChul be alone for so long, so he decided to finally return.
But when SiWon came back to the place, where he had left HeeChul, the other one wasn't there anymore.
SiWon looked around in confusion and worry. "HeeChul?!" he called but received no answer.
"HeeChul?" he shouted, louder this time.
"Why won't you call me HeeChullie anymore?" HeeChul asked with a pout on his lips.
SiWon jumped around, staring at HeeChul. "Oh my, don't ever scare me like that again."
"Only when you call me HeeChullie," HeeChul announced, still keeping his expression.
SiWon chuckled. "Alright,...HeeChullie." It hurt, calling HeeChul like that. SiWon had realized it before in the train.
"Here, this is for you," SiWon then announced and gave his flowers to HeeChul.
"Thank you," HeeChul said. "I have something for you, too," he added with a smug smile.
SiWon raised his eyebrows. "What?"
Without saying anything, HeeChul gave SiWon a little dark blue flower.
SiWon gasped in shock. This flower held so many memories of them, so how was it possible that HeeChul was giving him exactly this flower when there were still hundreds of other ones?
"It's so beautiful, isn't it?" HeeChul asked with a smile. His eyes were sparkling.
SiWon nodded, still in shock, and slowly reached for the little flower to take it. "Yes,...beautiful...," he murmured, more to himself.
"Sit down with me, SiWon," HeeChul told him and SiWon sank down to the soft ground. "How have you found it? It's rare." He watched HeeChul smile. This place didn't only help him, but also HeeChul to be happier, as it seemed.
"I know," HeeChul replied.
SiWon sighed. Seeing this flower once again, made him sad, but he hid it well. He didn't want to upset HeeChul. SiWon reached for HeeChul's hand and intertwined their fingers, while taking a closer look to the beautiful plant in his other hand.
"So beautiful...," he murmured again.
HeeChul leaned closer to SiWon, so he could lay his head onto the other's shoulder. He felt more and more comfortable around SiWon.
"SiWonnie...this flower...it's special, right?" HeeChul asked innocently.
"Yeah, for me, it is," SiWon replied, keeping his gaze on the flower and its unique color, when the sun was shining on it.
"SiWonnie," HeeChul said again.
>I asked you if you trusted me.
You said, 'Yes.'
So I made you close your eyes and let you promise not to look.
You kept your promise and I led you by your hand through the forest and to the field.
'Open your eyes,' I whispered into your ear and you did. Your eyes were shining with happiness at the sight of this beautiful place. 'I know this,' you told me and I smiled happily, saying,'I know. Do you remember when we ran away to play in the forest, when we were young? We found this place.'
Your eyes widened in sudden realization. You remembered.
'I promised to take you to this place once again someday. I keep my promise,' I said with a satisfied smile. You seemed to be so happy in that moment, because after I finished talking, you turned to me and kissed me until we were lying on the soft ground, between all the flowers.
We were laughing loudly, just lying there, looking at the sky or the flowers, or each other.
Only after some more minutes, you got up and helped me stand as well.
We strolled through the field, hand in hand. I remember this warmth and love of you, when all of a sudden, you noticed something and stopped.
I didn't know what was going on, but I stopped walking to stare at you.
You let go of my hand to kneel down. 'HeeChullie, look,' you said to me and I kneeled down next to you.
In front of us was a little blue flower, more beautiful than any other one around. It was shining and shimmering in the sun.
'Wow, it's so pretty,' I whispered and you agreed with me.
We stayed there, just lying next to that flower, and declared it as our special flower.
'It stands for hope, miracles and love that will never stop growing, even though there might be some obstacles. It stands for a difficult, but happy life,' you told me.
'I hope it will guard us and bring us happiness,' I said to you and you kissed me deeply. 'It will. I'm sure of it.'<
SiWon pushed HeeChul's head away to stare at him in shock. He was speechless.
"I remember. I can remember, SiWonnie," HeeChul whispered so quietly, that SiWon was barely able to hear it.
But he did and his eyes started to water. "You remember?" he repeated in disbelief and HeeChul nodded with a happy smile, even though tears formed in his eyes as well.
"You remember...HeeChullie!" SiWon immediately embraced HeeChul tightly, before kissing him deeply and passionately. "HeeChullie," he said once again and tears of happiness fell down his cheeks.
"I do. Everything," HeeChul told SiWon and reached for the other's hand in which the little blue flower still was.
"This is our special flower. I found it and it helped me to remember. SiWonnie, you were right. It stands for a difficult, but happy life. It stands for our life," HeeChul stated and kissed him happily.
"I love you, SiWonnie," HeeChul said. His smile was brighter than ever.
"I love you, too, HeeChullie." SiWon sniffed a little and tried to wipe his tears away. "I'm so happy," he whispered in relief.
"Me, too," HeeChul said and pressed his cheek to SiWon's.
"The doctor said, you probably would never remember. He said it was a miracle you even survived and are healthy. So this...it's another miracle," SiWon finally told HeeChul the truth.
The other one was shocked at first, but then started to smile once again.
"Now, we can stay together."
And they kissed.