twaaaaaaaam
yea so thinking abit....i've realized just how much I've changed. I mean I knew i couldn't remain te same forever but yea. The main thing that's changed me was my love with Brandon. I think i've really grown up because of all that I've gone through now. I'm not saying I'm some mature adult. But I am more mature.
I wrote this letter to him.
Dear Brandon William Shea,
All that has ran through my mind since the moment I met you on that cruise 8 months ago was how lucky I was someone like you was introduced into my life. From the first time you bit my neck in the elevator, to our first kiss in your cabin. All the memories of walking with your hand in mine and of the feel of your lips. Oh how it's just bliss. Then as quickly as this feeling of pure joy arouse..it was ripped by the department of the cruise. I couldn't even speak that whole day. I just wanted you back into my arms. A feeling that has never gone away. Just the very thought of you could brighten my whole day. You opened up my eyes Brandon. You showed me what love is....and how it feels to BE loved. something I'd never gotten from the string of mentaly abusing boyfriends and the physically abusing father. I told you I loved you long before you loved me too. When others woulda have given up hope, I waited...patiently. Knowing...HOPING that one day you'll realize I was the one. And when that night finally arrived...the night you said "Krysta...I love you"..That completed me. It went well for awhile...I had developed a sense of insecurity from my last boyfriends..which led me to think that i nthat week we didn't talk you would come to your senses and find some other girl. But no, you still loved me. Things we're awsome...until you shattered my world by telling me you liked cheyenne and wanted to be with her. I literally felt my heart break. I know it's only supposed to be metorphically speaking...but this was literal. I knew though, I knew that something woulda happen. There was no way you could love someone and just leave them like that in a heartbeat. and Alas..you came back to me. I forgave you whole heartedly. Things had to of course be mended. And they where. Once again things we're bliss..we had some bumps, yes. but what is life without them? Then came that fateful day. Which started from an IM from you an hour after you professing your love to me...denying it all. I was confused...This couldn't be true. and in my heart I knew it wasn't. Everything started falling apart....from the lies to the heart break. You telling another girl that you loved her..then destroying the TRUE love you had with me. And don't doubt me when I say th at what you and I had was and still is true, absolute, pure love. So..I guess what this whole letter is about...is, well. I love you. and Even as I sit here, crying, I know that I did, do and will always love you. My whole life growing up I believed that love was when you found the other half of your soul. the other half of your heart. I found that in YOU! You, Brandon William Shea are my true love. and If i had the chance i would go through every hurt youa nd I have had again because just loving you, and hearing you tell me you love me, and meaning it, makes it worth every last heart break. every last tear drop. The tears I am shedding right now I would gladly shed 1,000 more times if it just meant that I still felt this love for you. Right now I am exposing myself in a way i've never done...My only hope for this letter is that you'll just, if anything, peek a glimpse inside my heart. And that you'll know that even when you think you had no one....Even when your world is falling apart. I will always be there to catch you. To wipe and kiss your tears away. I will always be there to Love You.
sincerely heartfelt,
Krysta Laurent June
I wrote this letter to him.
Dear Brandon William Shea,
All that has ran through my mind since the moment I met you on that cruise 8 months ago was how lucky I was someone like you was introduced into my life. From the first time you bit my neck in the elevator, to our first kiss in your cabin. All the memories of walking with your hand in mine and of the feel of your lips. Oh how it's just bliss. Then as quickly as this feeling of pure joy arouse..it was ripped by the department of the cruise. I couldn't even speak that whole day. I just wanted you back into my arms. A feeling that has never gone away. Just the very thought of you could brighten my whole day. You opened up my eyes Brandon. You showed me what love is....and how it feels to BE loved. something I'd never gotten from the string of mentaly abusing boyfriends and the physically abusing father. I told you I loved you long before you loved me too. When others woulda have given up hope, I waited...patiently. Knowing...HOPING that one day you'll realize I was the one. And when that night finally arrived...the night you said "Krysta...I love you"..That completed me. It went well for awhile...I had developed a sense of insecurity from my last boyfriends..which led me to think that i nthat week we didn't talk you would come to your senses and find some other girl. But no, you still loved me. Things we're awsome...until you shattered my world by telling me you liked cheyenne and wanted to be with her. I literally felt my heart break. I know it's only supposed to be metorphically speaking...but this was literal. I knew though, I knew that something woulda happen. There was no way you could love someone and just leave them like that in a heartbeat. and Alas..you came back to me. I forgave you whole heartedly. Things had to of course be mended. And they where. Once again things we're bliss..we had some bumps, yes. but what is life without them? Then came that fateful day. Which started from an IM from you an hour after you professing your love to me...denying it all. I was confused...This couldn't be true. and in my heart I knew it wasn't. Everything started falling apart....from the lies to the heart break. You telling another girl that you loved her..then destroying the TRUE love you had with me. And don't doubt me when I say th at what you and I had was and still is true, absolute, pure love. So..I guess what this whole letter is about...is, well. I love you. and Even as I sit here, crying, I know that I did, do and will always love you. My whole life growing up I believed that love was when you found the other half of your soul. the other half of your heart. I found that in YOU! You, Brandon William Shea are my true love. and If i had the chance i would go through every hurt youa nd I have had again because just loving you, and hearing you tell me you love me, and meaning it, makes it worth every last heart break. every last tear drop. The tears I am shedding right now I would gladly shed 1,000 more times if it just meant that I still felt this love for you. Right now I am exposing myself in a way i've never done...My only hope for this letter is that you'll just, if anything, peek a glimpse inside my heart. And that you'll know that even when you think you had no one....Even when your world is falling apart. I will always be there to catch you. To wipe and kiss your tears away. I will always be there to Love You.
sincerely heartfelt,
Krysta Laurent June