AIM Quicklog go
WHO: Blackarachnia & Axel
WHERE: Somewhere near where the Decepticons are hanging out.
WHEN: 4/23; very very very early morning
WARNINGS: none
SUMMARY: Some talking
FORMAT: AIM Quicklog
Axel: "ow that's a lot harder than the floor"
*looks up, follows up her leg etc* .... hoooooooly shit.
"I must be drunker than I thought."
Blackarachnia: *just stares down at him*
[blinks, and shakes head] Huh. This your real form?
Yes. *still staring down at him*
[grins lopsided] Nice.
Xigbar'd pee himself at the sight of you - he likes giant robots.
Would be better if I were completely inorganic. *slowly sits or something*
That's lovely...
Xigbar's an ass.
So is an old fri- well he's not anymore so what does that matter.
Ohhhh the guy on the communtiy that uh... what's his face.
The one that sounds like a total dick.
Centurion or something.
Sentinel.
YEAH
And...he wasn't always like that.
*siiigh*
What, is he your ex or something?
*hisses*
right, right. No no subject. bad axel.
SO. What's up.
Not my mood. *sighs again and rest her chin on her hand*
Ohh. Okay, gimme a second. I need to be sober for this.
Uh...okay.
[goes off to one side and just kind of... lights himself on fire]
*watches*
[is basically burning the alcohol out of his system. SCIENCE WHAT SCIENCE]
*respects his science in silence then*
[and fire turns off!] there we go. Much better.
[sits down across from her] And the best part is, no hang over.
Lucky you. Such a trick wouldn't work for me.
Well, naturally, no. It's a fire elemental thing.
Of course. *goes silent*
So. I'm gonna warn you, I'm not the best at giving comfort.
It usually ends up really awkward and insincere, and something tells me that's not what you want right now.
I wouldn't expect it to be easy to comfort a giant robot anyway.
[shrugs] Giant robot, giant spider, talking lions, vampires, nightmare horrors from the center of the universe... people are people.
I suppose... *another sigh, shoulders falling a bit* You know I was finally getting used to this place then the blasted 'porter had to bring him in.
the porter usually isn't the bringer of good news. I'm guessing this new guy's a pretty big thorn in the past
He was...a friend just as Optimus was.
Ah.
So what's the hang-up? Too much has changed between then and now, and they're totally different people?
Pretty much. I don't know why I keep dwelling on the past, it's not doing me any good.
[just... nods]
Probably because the past is happier than the present.
Yeah...a lot happier.
[is quiet]
*is quiet as well as she lowers her head*
Man, I'm usually not one to join IN on the emo party.
Still, I know what you mean. If he showed up here and was the same person he was when i left...
*she blinks, all four eyes focused on Axel* If it hadn't been for those stupid spiders...
Or my own useless abiblity.
What, stealing other people's powers? That's not useless.
It is when it has a time limit.
well.
all the same, be glad it was spiders, and not something worse.
I can't think of anything worse that could have been down there. I think a few surviving Decepticons would have been easier to deal with than that horde of giant spiders.
[lowers his head a little and looks up at her] What about unkillable monsters that eat hearts?
*quietly thinks about that*
I don't know...never dealt with anything that eats sparks.
Mmm, well then that makes one of us.
*sigh* ...At least Optimus talked to me like I wasn't a monster.
Oh, now that's just a dick move.
(1:22:04 AM): I didn't choose to be this...okay well I did choose to be a Decepticon which was a stupid mistake but...still.
(1:22:15 AM): I never wanted to be some mutated techno-organic freak.
No one ever wants what fate's shoved into their laps. But look at the bright side - you've got a way of going back to normal, right?
Unless some heartless show up or I go back to being a total bastard, I'm stuck like this for good.
Yes, but there's a few bugs to work out.
What do you mean?
[looks up, and SMIRKS] Want to hear a story?
Uh...sure, I suppose so.
well.
Once upon a time, there was a young man. He lived a normal life in a normal city, doing normal things that normal guys in their early twenties do. Back then, if you would haev told him that his world was part of a huge multiverse - one star in an entire galaxy - he would have laughed his ass off and called you crazy.
Anyway, one day this young man is minding his own normal business, and suddenly the shadows around him came to life. The shadows ate everything around him - his family, his friends, his neighbors, the neighbor's obnoxious dog...
And since there were only more and more of them with every heart they ate, they finally turned toward the normal young man who was having a very not normal day. And instead of doing what normal people do and dying like a good boy, he decided that he was just too damn stubborn to die.
So the shadows came and ate his heart as well, and since he was so stubborn, he woke up somewhere else instead. No heart, and no memories save his name and a few other flickers.
And then, he ran into some other people like him - people with no hearts and barely a name to hang onto. and their boss was rebuilding the center of the universe - rebuild the unvierse, regain your heart, your life. great plan, huh?
So he went along with it - after all, why give a crap about anything or anyone when you have no heart to care about them with?
And he was damn good at his job - outing traitors, lying, cheating, tricking, stealing...
And then some kid like him - no heart, no memories, just a name - comes along and screws it all up.
Befriends him.
And after a year of learning what it's like to have friends again, to be human, to feel after not feeling for so long... his friend leaves him in the dirt.
And guess who has to go drag his traitorous ass back?
So the Nobody went to drag his friend back dead or alive, except his friend's been kidnapped by some vengeful jerk and stuck inside a Virtual Reality. And said jerk had the courtesy to completely wipe the friend's memories, so when the Nobody shows up? he doesn't remember him at all.
so what's a Nobody supposed to do, huh? Kill his best friend, or be killed for being a traitor himself.
.... yeah, I'll shut up now.
Sounds pretty...crappy. I sometimes wish I hadn't had any memories after all that...or better yet have not come back online.
Although if I had been without my memories I probably would have gone searching for them or something.
[snorts] That's the funny thing - they always remain two inches out of your grasp.
Memories are tied to the heart, after all.
No memories are just files stored away. I suppose I could delete them if I wanted...but then what am I to do then? I suppose without them I don't have my goals.
Probably not.
see, that's the funny thing about this interuniversal kerfuffle. my rules are way different than yours.
You might be right about the memory thing. I don't know. I'm no expert on the property of sparks. Maybe it's the same for us.
Maybe. [sits back] I guess this is my roundabout way of cheering you up - you're lucky to have your heart. Spark.
Well, if I didn't have it I'd be offline.
See? Positive thinking.
So...does that make you some kind of what is it...zombie or something?
Pretty much. I think the official term is Psychological Zombie.
I literally have no emotions - any behavior that would indicate otherwise is me being a very, very good actor.
Hmm, I see.
[[so isn't saying anything about Roxas]]
It's easier to forget that way, though. Act enough and eventually I can almost fool myself.
I imagine.
So. Now you know my dark, dirty secret. Only other people that know are Hiruma and starscream.
Naturally, I don't give a hoot if you tell anyone - can't. ahaha.
Heh. I'm not really one to talk about such things anyway. I can't imagine it coming up in some conversation.
... that WOULD be a really awkward conversation.
It certainly would.
Ugh, I'd still like to crush him. Although that probably wouldn't be the best idea.
Who, that Sentinel guy?
Yes. It'd be easy right now.
Probably not, if your other boyfriend is as much of a do-good as he comes across.
He's not my boyfriend. I don't see that ever happening anyway.
[shrug]
Knowing heroes, it's generally not a good idea to step on their acquaintances. That's when they pull out the weapon and start hitting.
Yes, yes I know. Trust me.
[snortlaughs] Man, Iron Man sure has a weird definition of hero. Here we are, two morally ambiguous "monsters" sitting on a roof top discussing our villanous exploits. Funny, isn't it?
[[uses air quotes]]
Well, as I've been told he has no controll over that 'porter of his. So I believe it's the transporter that is the one with poor judgement.
It also has a sick sense a humor.
I'll believe that as truth if Roxas shows up.
Roxas?
Remember the friend I told you about?
Ah.
*hissing* Ugh, I hadn't thought very much about Sentinel until he had to fragging show up. I really hate this place.
do you?
Yes, I do. It was tolerable before, even when I was stuck in a human shell but now... *hissing again*
You know, I hate to rain on the parade, but what if this isn't permanent?
If what isn't permanent?
Having your original body back.
Someone already reverted to being human again. It was on the comm earlier.
First off this isn't my orignal body.
And...if that's the case.
It just makes this place even worse...and I guess I'll just finish off the rest of the alcohol Thundercracker left me.
Bad idea. If that happens, find a healthier outlet.
I can't think of one.
Beating someone up?
Well, that's not healthy for them, but.
Last time I tried that Optimus had to save my aft.
Ah.
... what, did you try to take on someone five times your size or something?
...It showed up out of nowhere okay. I was dealing with smaller guys.
Of course now that thing wouldn't have been a problem.
Of course not.
*siiigh* I wonder how things would be if I'd gotten out of the cave without being turned into this.
Well, what DO you think?
I don't know. Finished up at the Academy and then...who knows. Maybe somehow I still would have ended up joining the Decepticons. Maybe not.
Maybe, maybe, maybe.
See, that's the problem with dwelling on the past - it wraps you up so tightly, you start to suffocate.
Well, when I don't have other things to do it happens.
I can't do anything else on my little project just yet so I'm stuck waiting and dwelling on the past.
I think you need a hobby.
Probably.
Anything in mind?
Nope.
There was plenty to occupy my time with when I was stuck as a human. Two jobs plus all the things humans have to do to survive.
true! but all work and no play makes jack a dull boy
Good movie.
Eh?
Oh, it's a horror movie I watched recently. About some writer that goes crazy in a haunted hotel.
Oh. I don't watch many movies or a lot of television.
It's a great way to get your mind off of things. Escapism in its finest form.
Reading is good, too
I did a lot of that too when I was a human. Mainly stuff on biology and some history.
Well then, why not now? It'll give you something to do besides mope
It's not as easy to focus on reading like this, multitasking is simple now. My head isn't all cluttered like it was when I was a human.
Ah. [thinking] Man, that must be really efficient.
It is.
I'm also a lot saner..or was until the 'porter decided to do what it did.
Hmm. Might want to get that checked out.
Then again, sanity is over-rated. Unless it's Saix.
[shudder] now THERE'S someone I don't want to see ever again.
Sanity is over rated...except when thoughts become to loud to even sleep.
Ah.
[shrug] I only sleep when I have to, which isn't very often.
I wasn't sleeping much...which is probably why I ended up sick but honestly how couch I sleep when there was so much to do?
Good point. But remember, patience is a virtue.
Rush too much, and the results aren't perfect.
And there's nothing more satisfying than a perfectly executed plan.
True but it's hard to be patient when I don't want to be partially...or in the case before completely, organic anymore.
No. But think of how much better it'll be when you do it RIGHT.
So you've got to swallow some indignity, big deal.
I've been this way for a thousand stellar cycles, that just makes it even harder to be patient
Well, then you'll just have to cope, i suppose.
Ugh.
Sorry I'm not much help, but, like I said. I suck at giving comfort and advice.
Yeah well I can't blame you for that.
Glad you understand.
Yeah well, I'm not used to even having someone to talk to. The other Decepticons don't want to talk to a freak like me, the Dinobots are idiots...
Hah, well... I'm glad I could be of use, then.
Yeah, I think I'm good now.
Super. Want me to bring you back a souvenier from Vegas?
Hmm, sure. If you really want to.
Why not. Knowing Hiruma, we're going to be up to our ears in cash anyway. I have never seen anyone count cards like him. Not even Luxord.
Well then it better be something good.
Sure thing.
Anyway, have fun with your projects - and don't let some jerkass from your past get you down.
I'll try.
Good girl. Later~ [and poofs out]
Axel: "ow that's a lot harder than the floor"
*looks up, follows up her leg etc* .... hoooooooly shit.
"I must be drunker than I thought."
Blackarachnia: *just stares down at him*
[blinks, and shakes head] Huh. This your real form?
Yes. *still staring down at him*
[grins lopsided] Nice.
Xigbar'd pee himself at the sight of you - he likes giant robots.
Would be better if I were completely inorganic. *slowly sits or something*
That's lovely...
Xigbar's an ass.
So is an old fri- well he's not anymore so what does that matter.
Ohhhh the guy on the communtiy that uh... what's his face.
The one that sounds like a total dick.
Centurion or something.
Sentinel.
YEAH
And...he wasn't always like that.
*siiigh*
What, is he your ex or something?
*hisses*
right, right. No no subject. bad axel.
SO. What's up.
Not my mood. *sighs again and rest her chin on her hand*
Ohh. Okay, gimme a second. I need to be sober for this.
Uh...okay.
[goes off to one side and just kind of... lights himself on fire]
*watches*
[is basically burning the alcohol out of his system. SCIENCE WHAT SCIENCE]
*respects his science in silence then*
[and fire turns off!] there we go. Much better.
[sits down across from her] And the best part is, no hang over.
Lucky you. Such a trick wouldn't work for me.
Well, naturally, no. It's a fire elemental thing.
Of course. *goes silent*
So. I'm gonna warn you, I'm not the best at giving comfort.
It usually ends up really awkward and insincere, and something tells me that's not what you want right now.
I wouldn't expect it to be easy to comfort a giant robot anyway.
[shrugs] Giant robot, giant spider, talking lions, vampires, nightmare horrors from the center of the universe... people are people.
I suppose... *another sigh, shoulders falling a bit* You know I was finally getting used to this place then the blasted 'porter had to bring him in.
the porter usually isn't the bringer of good news. I'm guessing this new guy's a pretty big thorn in the past
He was...a friend just as Optimus was.
Ah.
So what's the hang-up? Too much has changed between then and now, and they're totally different people?
Pretty much. I don't know why I keep dwelling on the past, it's not doing me any good.
[just... nods]
Probably because the past is happier than the present.
Yeah...a lot happier.
[is quiet]
*is quiet as well as she lowers her head*
Man, I'm usually not one to join IN on the emo party.
Still, I know what you mean. If he showed up here and was the same person he was when i left...
*she blinks, all four eyes focused on Axel* If it hadn't been for those stupid spiders...
Or my own useless abiblity.
What, stealing other people's powers? That's not useless.
It is when it has a time limit.
well.
all the same, be glad it was spiders, and not something worse.
I can't think of anything worse that could have been down there. I think a few surviving Decepticons would have been easier to deal with than that horde of giant spiders.
[lowers his head a little and looks up at her] What about unkillable monsters that eat hearts?
*quietly thinks about that*
I don't know...never dealt with anything that eats sparks.
Mmm, well then that makes one of us.
*sigh* ...At least Optimus talked to me like I wasn't a monster.
Oh, now that's just a dick move.
(1:22:04 AM): I didn't choose to be this...okay well I did choose to be a Decepticon which was a stupid mistake but...still.
(1:22:15 AM): I never wanted to be some mutated techno-organic freak.
No one ever wants what fate's shoved into their laps. But look at the bright side - you've got a way of going back to normal, right?
Unless some heartless show up or I go back to being a total bastard, I'm stuck like this for good.
Yes, but there's a few bugs to work out.
What do you mean?
[looks up, and SMIRKS] Want to hear a story?
Uh...sure, I suppose so.
well.
Once upon a time, there was a young man. He lived a normal life in a normal city, doing normal things that normal guys in their early twenties do. Back then, if you would haev told him that his world was part of a huge multiverse - one star in an entire galaxy - he would have laughed his ass off and called you crazy.
Anyway, one day this young man is minding his own normal business, and suddenly the shadows around him came to life. The shadows ate everything around him - his family, his friends, his neighbors, the neighbor's obnoxious dog...
And since there were only more and more of them with every heart they ate, they finally turned toward the normal young man who was having a very not normal day. And instead of doing what normal people do and dying like a good boy, he decided that he was just too damn stubborn to die.
So the shadows came and ate his heart as well, and since he was so stubborn, he woke up somewhere else instead. No heart, and no memories save his name and a few other flickers.
And then, he ran into some other people like him - people with no hearts and barely a name to hang onto. and their boss was rebuilding the center of the universe - rebuild the unvierse, regain your heart, your life. great plan, huh?
So he went along with it - after all, why give a crap about anything or anyone when you have no heart to care about them with?
And he was damn good at his job - outing traitors, lying, cheating, tricking, stealing...
And then some kid like him - no heart, no memories, just a name - comes along and screws it all up.
Befriends him.
And after a year of learning what it's like to have friends again, to be human, to feel after not feeling for so long... his friend leaves him in the dirt.
And guess who has to go drag his traitorous ass back?
So the Nobody went to drag his friend back dead or alive, except his friend's been kidnapped by some vengeful jerk and stuck inside a Virtual Reality. And said jerk had the courtesy to completely wipe the friend's memories, so when the Nobody shows up? he doesn't remember him at all.
so what's a Nobody supposed to do, huh? Kill his best friend, or be killed for being a traitor himself.
.... yeah, I'll shut up now.
Sounds pretty...crappy. I sometimes wish I hadn't had any memories after all that...or better yet have not come back online.
Although if I had been without my memories I probably would have gone searching for them or something.
[snorts] That's the funny thing - they always remain two inches out of your grasp.
Memories are tied to the heart, after all.
No memories are just files stored away. I suppose I could delete them if I wanted...but then what am I to do then? I suppose without them I don't have my goals.
Probably not.
see, that's the funny thing about this interuniversal kerfuffle. my rules are way different than yours.
You might be right about the memory thing. I don't know. I'm no expert on the property of sparks. Maybe it's the same for us.
Maybe. [sits back] I guess this is my roundabout way of cheering you up - you're lucky to have your heart. Spark.
Well, if I didn't have it I'd be offline.
See? Positive thinking.
So...does that make you some kind of what is it...zombie or something?
Pretty much. I think the official term is Psychological Zombie.
I literally have no emotions - any behavior that would indicate otherwise is me being a very, very good actor.
Hmm, I see.
[[so isn't saying anything about Roxas]]
It's easier to forget that way, though. Act enough and eventually I can almost fool myself.
I imagine.
So. Now you know my dark, dirty secret. Only other people that know are Hiruma and starscream.
Naturally, I don't give a hoot if you tell anyone - can't. ahaha.
Heh. I'm not really one to talk about such things anyway. I can't imagine it coming up in some conversation.
... that WOULD be a really awkward conversation.
It certainly would.
Ugh, I'd still like to crush him. Although that probably wouldn't be the best idea.
Who, that Sentinel guy?
Yes. It'd be easy right now.
Probably not, if your other boyfriend is as much of a do-good as he comes across.
He's not my boyfriend. I don't see that ever happening anyway.
[shrug]
Knowing heroes, it's generally not a good idea to step on their acquaintances. That's when they pull out the weapon and start hitting.
Yes, yes I know. Trust me.
[snortlaughs] Man, Iron Man sure has a weird definition of hero. Here we are, two morally ambiguous "monsters" sitting on a roof top discussing our villanous exploits. Funny, isn't it?
[[uses air quotes]]
Well, as I've been told he has no controll over that 'porter of his. So I believe it's the transporter that is the one with poor judgement.
It also has a sick sense a humor.
I'll believe that as truth if Roxas shows up.
Roxas?
Remember the friend I told you about?
Ah.
*hissing* Ugh, I hadn't thought very much about Sentinel until he had to fragging show up. I really hate this place.
do you?
Yes, I do. It was tolerable before, even when I was stuck in a human shell but now... *hissing again*
You know, I hate to rain on the parade, but what if this isn't permanent?
If what isn't permanent?
Having your original body back.
Someone already reverted to being human again. It was on the comm earlier.
First off this isn't my orignal body.
And...if that's the case.
It just makes this place even worse...and I guess I'll just finish off the rest of the alcohol Thundercracker left me.
Bad idea. If that happens, find a healthier outlet.
I can't think of one.
Beating someone up?
Well, that's not healthy for them, but.
Last time I tried that Optimus had to save my aft.
Ah.
... what, did you try to take on someone five times your size or something?
...It showed up out of nowhere okay. I was dealing with smaller guys.
Of course now that thing wouldn't have been a problem.
Of course not.
*siiigh* I wonder how things would be if I'd gotten out of the cave without being turned into this.
Well, what DO you think?
I don't know. Finished up at the Academy and then...who knows. Maybe somehow I still would have ended up joining the Decepticons. Maybe not.
Maybe, maybe, maybe.
See, that's the problem with dwelling on the past - it wraps you up so tightly, you start to suffocate.
Well, when I don't have other things to do it happens.
I can't do anything else on my little project just yet so I'm stuck waiting and dwelling on the past.
I think you need a hobby.
Probably.
Anything in mind?
Nope.
There was plenty to occupy my time with when I was stuck as a human. Two jobs plus all the things humans have to do to survive.
true! but all work and no play makes jack a dull boy
Good movie.
Eh?
Oh, it's a horror movie I watched recently. About some writer that goes crazy in a haunted hotel.
Oh. I don't watch many movies or a lot of television.
It's a great way to get your mind off of things. Escapism in its finest form.
Reading is good, too
I did a lot of that too when I was a human. Mainly stuff on biology and some history.
Well then, why not now? It'll give you something to do besides mope
It's not as easy to focus on reading like this, multitasking is simple now. My head isn't all cluttered like it was when I was a human.
Ah. [thinking] Man, that must be really efficient.
It is.
I'm also a lot saner..or was until the 'porter decided to do what it did.
Hmm. Might want to get that checked out.
Then again, sanity is over-rated. Unless it's Saix.
[shudder] now THERE'S someone I don't want to see ever again.
Sanity is over rated...except when thoughts become to loud to even sleep.
Ah.
[shrug] I only sleep when I have to, which isn't very often.
I wasn't sleeping much...which is probably why I ended up sick but honestly how couch I sleep when there was so much to do?
Good point. But remember, patience is a virtue.
Rush too much, and the results aren't perfect.
And there's nothing more satisfying than a perfectly executed plan.
True but it's hard to be patient when I don't want to be partially...or in the case before completely, organic anymore.
No. But think of how much better it'll be when you do it RIGHT.
So you've got to swallow some indignity, big deal.
I've been this way for a thousand stellar cycles, that just makes it even harder to be patient
Well, then you'll just have to cope, i suppose.
Ugh.
Sorry I'm not much help, but, like I said. I suck at giving comfort and advice.
Yeah well I can't blame you for that.
Glad you understand.
Yeah well, I'm not used to even having someone to talk to. The other Decepticons don't want to talk to a freak like me, the Dinobots are idiots...
Hah, well... I'm glad I could be of use, then.
Yeah, I think I'm good now.
Super. Want me to bring you back a souvenier from Vegas?
Hmm, sure. If you really want to.
Why not. Knowing Hiruma, we're going to be up to our ears in cash anyway. I have never seen anyone count cards like him. Not even Luxord.
Well then it better be something good.
Sure thing.
Anyway, have fun with your projects - and don't let some jerkass from your past get you down.
I'll try.
Good girl. Later~ [and poofs out]