My Personal Experience of Rape....

[blogtastic_dee]

In the future, when I think back upon the news and media of 2012 and 2013, there's a word I'm going to recall having heard a lot of, "RAPE." The instances are too many for me to hyperlink to now, but a short list might highlight: Tosh O., Military Rapes, Rape Jokes, Legitimate Rape, Rape Easy, Steubenville, Sandusky, and Rape Culture. There are far

Comments

[anonymous]

You are not alone. I too have had an experience not unlike this that took me years to see for what it was, a date rape. I too am forever changed by one night.

[blogtastic_dee]

We often have occurrences that change our lives. Like B.C. and A.D. time keeping, most of us have a before-something and after-something world view. And sometimes there's several in one life. I'm sorry that one such life changing event was, for you, a rape. I can guess that a lot of people who have suffered rape feel that way, but I can't know that for certain because I can't recall ever having sat down with a chum and asking how such a moment impacted their life. Sad, huh?

Well, I extend my kindest and fondest wish that Life will afford you a better 'before' and 'after' moment someday, though it can never erase that past one.

[blogtastic_dee]

And thank you for supporting what I shared. I'm sad it's not a unique experience, but it's pretty amazing to have an exchange about it.

[anonymous]

Beautifully written! Thank you for writing this. I am certain this will help a lot of women.

[blogtastic_dee]

Thank you so much for the compliment! If people read it, I do hope the discourse proves helpful. :o)

[ajr51594]

Oh Delya. I just want to hug you. Thank you for sharing this part of your history. I don't know what else to say. And maybe that is part of it too. Someone who has not experienced this fears not saying the right thing. I agree that something is happening with the media, it's like they want to desensitize us to rape, to hearing about it and talking about it. I don't think women should suffer in silence, but it seems like all these politicians are trying to normalize it almost? I don't know. It's fishy. The real conversation about it is what you have done here. I wish you peace about this event, Delya. Hugs.

[blogtastic_dee]

Yes, I agree the word has been used to excess. I think my problem (and I can't speak for rape victims / survivors, since we're a pretty quiet lot of folks, overall) is that the shrieking doesn't feel like it's doing anything. I don't gain anything personally from hearing what demons some men can be, and how bad a problem it is, or how unsafe I am all the time. What has been simply incredible for me today is saying what I actually feel or felt (kind of stupid and embarrassed, honestly) and having some really kind and lovely people text, email, reply and tell me about their experiences. On a purely selfish level, I've enjoyed the validation of having my writing or thoughts praised. But the best bit is truly just talking in a real way. It doesn't give me half the anxiety that the constant news reports give me.