Oh. My. Gosh. This is...GENIUS. Really, it is! I am so, so happy with this. L-Let me start at the beginning.
Your writing skill is...SUPERB. For the relatively small IchiHitsu fandom, your skills is top-tier. Let me point this part out: Ichigo’s dad enthused the idea, Yuzu, Ms. Knut, and Orihimi latched on, begging Toshiro. He loudly roared his refusal. Karin ignored everyone. Ichigo snickered. HOW DO YOU DO IT? In two sentences, you've literally constructed the personality of all the characters involved. It's absolutely GENIUSSSS!!! *O*
...I am a sucker for characterization and IC-ness. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for that. This paragraph had me squealing in delight: “Ichigo!” Toshiro hissed and squirmed uncomfortably. He hated public displays of affection. Especially around that gossip-mongering blabbermouth of a fukutaichou. Suddenly suspicious teal eyes shrewdly scanned the hall but found no trace of big-boobed, peeping toms. He looked up at the ceiling and, ever the cynic, snorted in derision. “What
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I'm glad you like it, I tried really hard to keep them IC but was afraid I'd failed. I think of Hitsu as a dominate uke; he's the 'girl' in the relationship, but he's no pussy- he's one bossy bitch. I can't see Ichigo as being uke ever; he's soo seme in my book, but he's also a very whipped strawberry when it comes to Hitsu. I think Hitsu would have him wrapped tightly around his little pinky. ^^ I usually don't like girl characters (that's how I got into yaoi hehe...) but I do like Matsumoto and Yoruichi for some odd reason. Especially when Matsu is making Hitsu miserable. ^^
*reaches up to nose and pulls blood away* I didn't even know I was bleeding....but anyway, not only was the lemonade delicious, I think you did a wonderful job with the actual writing of the story. It was wonderfully well embellished, especially for a Christmas fic. I've just started perusing this community, but I'm already hooked. Good Job and Good Luck =D
Thanks. ^^ I'm glad I didn't screw the lemon up, and I'm glad the acutual writing was good, too! Hopefully it means my writing skills are improving. ^^
well you're dont have anything to worry about :) have you ever thought about being a writer? (though i dont know how old you are so this might not apply to you anymore...) you're writing style is amazing.
Comments 7
Oh. My. Gosh. This is...GENIUS. Really, it is! I am so, so happy with this. L-Let me start at the beginning.
Your writing skill is...SUPERB. For the relatively small IchiHitsu fandom, your skills is top-tier. Let me point this part out: Ichigo’s dad enthused the idea, Yuzu, Ms. Knut, and Orihimi latched on, begging Toshiro. He loudly roared his refusal. Karin ignored everyone. Ichigo snickered. HOW DO YOU DO IT? In two sentences, you've literally constructed the personality of all the characters involved. It's absolutely GENIUSSSS!!! *O*
...I am a sucker for characterization and IC-ness. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for that. This paragraph had me squealing in delight: “Ichigo!” Toshiro hissed and squirmed uncomfortably. He hated public displays of affection. Especially around that gossip-mongering blabbermouth of a fukutaichou. Suddenly suspicious teal eyes shrewdly scanned the hall but found no trace of big-boobed, peeping toms. He looked up at the ceiling and, ever the cynic, snorted in derision. “What ( ... )
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I usually don't like girl characters (that's how I got into yaoi hehe...) but I do like Matsumoto and Yoruichi for some odd reason. Especially when Matsu is making Hitsu miserable. ^^
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