ok i was confiding in nick that i was nervous about calling spencer on the phone. and he just was like " solve ur damn problems and stop whining." ummmm i wasnt whining and i told him that.. i was like " i was talking in my normal voice". and he was like " well stop complaining". I mean this is insane.. i tell people i keep things to myself because ( Read more... )

nothing. i got nothing to write about. devin isnt mad at me. thats awesome. cause thats my best friend. we talked about selling body parts on ebay. i told him to drain the blood first. cause the blood is the most important part.. in my opinion... anyway.. my da is going to buy my etnies this week. and that rocks. may go home and then come back ( Read more... )

hm there is just this sudden impact of feeling better. i had a dream some kid attacked me in the lunch room.. it was pretty interesting.. cause i just got back up and started walking again. hm it was also weird.. because he started to deteriate once i got back up. it was so funny.. then i woke up. it was ok. i didnt want to dream anymore any way. i ( Read more... )

hm devin isnt on.. i dont think he wants to talk to a liar like me anymore.. so oh well... ill just crawl into my little cave.. and die.. like i planned.. but i dont know how i am going to end this.. i cant take much more.. i dont know how i was surviving this far.. but i did.. if i can make this.. do u think i can make more time? dont answer that ( Read more... )

Well i am still depressed. just got off the phone with kaitlin. we were talking about how parents get on our nerves. speaking of which. my mom is getting on my nerves so bad. i just think i am near the edge of claiming insanity..... wait.... ive already done that. nvm. n e way i am so bored . well depressed mostly. and a little rejected.. wait.. no ( Read more... )

I am at my dad's house. this is pretty interesting. i am having fun i guess.. i dont have to clean much. i still need to do laundry. I am really depressed still. cause i didnt get to talk to devin last night. well i did.. but not for very long i guess. which kinda sucks. but oh well.. i am on my dad's sn. so im not really fetting much response from ( Read more... )

Last night was terrible.. had some cutting thoughts. and devin and i were kinda arguing. well i feel like crap.. wondering does he still love me.. cause i still love him. i didnt cut myself. even after i had my little cry after i voluntarily signed off. he knows i lie to him.. well i mean im not lying for bad things. i was lying to protect him.. ( Read more... )

Well today was cool. last night i was over rebecca;s cause of the football game. so i spent the night. and we had fun.. today we goofed off and went to the movies. and that was all.. met some cool high schoolers. and now my nickname is billy.. " HEY BILLY, FUNKY PETE PART ONE" lol. me and alex had lots of fun like we used to have.. it was strange ( Read more... )

Well i am depressed to the MAX. i mean depressed.. but spencer made me feel better.. i wonder is devin ok..i just imed him.. but he isnt replying just yet. so ill wait. nick said the dance was repetitive. but he had fun. so go figure. man im like so sad.. i dont even know what im eating. my mom forgot to pick up my food. and she said i couldnt get ( Read more... )

Devin is upset... and when he is.. so am i. say goodbye to me.. kids cause if he goes.. i go to.. u dont understand.. he is my best friend.. he was there when no one was. so if he goes then i go to.. its just the way things are.. call me what u want.. i dont care.. cause its always been me and him in a world of nothing anyhow.. my day was ok.. it ( Read more... )